Shadow Oracle by Laura Greenwood
Four
Before I fully know whatI'm doing, I find myself knocking on Mathias' door and bouncing up and down on the balls of my feet.
Shuffling sounds come from within right up until the moment he pulls open the door, a surprised expression on his face.
"Sorry…" I start.
"What for? I'm just surprised you're done already." He steps back and gestures for me to come inside, not in the slightest bit annoyed that I'm here.
I stop as I pass him and go up on my toes so I can brush a quick kiss against his lips. I'm still getting used to what we are to one another, but it's getting easier by the day.
"Is the career department normally long-winded?" I ask.
"Sometimes."
I sigh and flop down onto his bed, which is on the opposite side of the room to my own. Other than that, his room is exactly the same, just mirrored.
"Maybe she wanted to get rid of me because I kept saying I didn't know what I wanted. I'd have gotten rid of me too."
"I'm sure that's not it." He comes to sit down next to me, flipping closed the notebook next to him.
"Sorry, I interrupted your studying."
He shrugs. "You're a welcome distraction from economics."
I wrinkle my nose just at the thought of it. He might have a point there.
"What did you tell them you wanted to do when they asked?"
"That I was considering the Reaper Guard," he responds.
"Is that what you really want?"
"I'm not sure. I thought it was when I arrived here, but I also wanted to keep my options open in case anything else felt like a better fit."
I sigh. "Why is it so complicated?"
He puts his arm around me and pulls me closer. "Because the people in charge like making things difficult for the rest of us."
I snort.
"I take it the Reaper Guard isn't something you want?" he prompts.
"It confuses me," I admit. "A part of me thinks it sounds interesting and is a natural fit, but is that just because discovering I'm a reaper is a new thing so it feels like what I have to do?"
He nods along with what I'm saying. "I understand that. Sometimes I think it's what I was interested in because it sounds like the most exciting to young reapers. But is that me? I'm not sure."
"You're not reassuring me much here."
Mathias chuckles. "I'm not sure what you expected. We're the same age at the same point in life, the only difference is that I've known I'm a reaper my whole life and you haven't. It doesn't change anything else."
"Don't be so logical," I mumble.
"We don't have to decide now," he points out. "When I came to the academy, Dad told me that no matter what happened, I shouldn't limit myself and go into things with an open mind, especially when it came to careers. He didn't settle on what he wanted to do until he was in his thirties. Mum still hasn't decided, she has a new career plan every couple of years."
"What do they do now?"
"Dad's an estate agent. He promises haunting free houses to his clients. Mum's currently training to be a cake decorator, but I don't think that's going to last as long as some of her other jobs have."
"Why not?"
"She's not very good at it." He pulls out his phone and clicks on a chat. He turns the phone towards me so I can see the photo on the screen.
My eyes widen as I take in the monstrosity being called a cake. It's wonky, and the icing that I suspect is supposed to be white is actually a sickly yellow, with too much glitter and a creepy twist of something on the top.
"Is that a flower?" I ask.
"Nobody knows. We're not brave enough to ask." Amusement and affection enter his voice. No matter what he thinks of his mum's cake decorating ability, it's clear he loves her. It makes me less nervous about meeting them soon. They created someone as loving and kind as Mathias, that says something.
"Neither of your parents do reaper jobs?" I check.
"No. Though Dad's half-counts. And he used to be in the Reaper Guard himself."
"Why did he leave?"
"I don't know. He's never told me. I think because he doesn't want to influence my choice."
"Ominous."
"Perhaps a little," he agrees. "But I don't think it necessarily means anything. I'm not him, which means whether or not the Reaper Guard is a good fit for me is a different question to whether it's right for him. The same goes for you."
"Would you be sad if I didn't join with you?"
He shrugs. "It'll suck not getting to spend as much time with you regardless of what careers we choose, but that's just something life will throw at us in a couple of years."
The casualness of his statement does nothing to distract me from the fact he's clearly thinking we'll still be together in a few years time. Warmth floods through me at the idea.
"But neither of us have to decide anything now," he points out. "All we have to do is keep studying the subjects we find interesting and make sure we don't limit ourselves to one thing or another. And we can keep our reaper bounty points up. It's not like we're automatically drafted into the Reaper Guard if they're good, but we have the choice to join if they are."
I nod. "That sounds like a good idea."
Before I can say anything else, my phone begins to ring. I frown.
"Isn't that Agent Fielding's ringtone?" Mathias asks.
I nod. She's one of the only people who isn't set to mute. "But I'm not expecting a call."
"Then it's probably important." Hence why she isn't set to silent in the first place.
I dig my phone out of my pocket, unsurprised to find caller ID confirming our suspicions. I hit the green button and get to my feet so I can pace while I talk. I'm not sure why I like to do that, but it helps me think.
"Hello?"
"Syxe?" Agent Fielding asks.
"Speaking." It is my phone after all.
"I just wanted to call and give you an update."
My heart starts to race and my hands feel slightly slippery with sweat. "Okay."
"I talked to Reed Smithers today."
"She agreed to that?"
"Surprisingly quickly," she says down the line. "She said something about feeling very isolated now you and the other girl you'd been living with had moved out."
"Annalise. She took the Shadow Oath when I refused to." She must have moved into the adult dorms at the Shadow Association headquarters.
"Yes. Well, she told us enough about what's going on for me to be able to petition a judge. We should be able to legally step in and remove any minors from the Association's care within a week or two."
"A week?" Relief crashes through me. "That's amazing."
"It's not certain yet. I'm reasonably sure we'll be able to, but there's still a chance that things will go wrong. But I didn't want you to be surprised if you saw any news reports about it without me telling you," Fielding says.
"Thank you." I know she doesn't have to keep me in the loop, especially not when I'm only a witness. Though maybe that's why she's doing it. So much of her case is resting on what I've told her that she needs to keep on my good side so I don't end up rescinding any of it.
Not that I plan to. I'm glad someone is working to stop the Shadow Association from continuing the way they have.
"Anyway, I just wanted to let you know. I'll see you at our next meeting."
"Thanks, see you then," I respond.
The line goes dead and I let out a deep sigh.
"That sounded like good news," Mathias says.
"She said they think they'll be able to get the children out. Reed talked to her while she was away from the house."
"The girl who used to tease you?"
I nod. "Just because I don't like her doesn't mean she deserves to be controlled the way I was."
"I know," he agrees. "And it doesn't mean she can't be useful to Fielding's investigation too."
"Exactly. Whatever gets the most people to safety." I sit back on the bed beside him, confusion overtaking me for a moment. "Why don't I feel like it's a victory?"
"Because it's only a small one?" Mathias suggests. "What you really want is far bigger than getting some children out of the house."
"No, it isn't that. I mean, I think it is that. But it's more than that. These are the people I grew up with."
"Ah. I see."
I shuffle around so I can see him properly. "You do?"
He nods. "They're not your friends, and you didn't have a good time in that house, but it was still your home. You're going to feel weird about it not being anymore."
"I suppose..."
"What were you planning on doing when the holidays come around?" he asks.
My eyes widen. I've never once considered that, which is something he seems to have figured out already.
"See, meeting my parents is a good thing," he jokes. "You'll come spend it with us."
"And your family will be all right with that?"
"They will be if they don't want me to stay here and not come home. But that's not the point I was trying to make. It's just that that house is where you grew up, it's the only place you've ever called home. You're going to have some mixed feelings about it, and that's okay."
I close my eyes and rest my head against his shoulder, feeling safe while I'm in his arms.
"I feel exhausted already," I mutter.
"That's because you've been living life on the edge for too long. Do you have any other classes today?"
I shake my head.
"Good. Then I'm going to order some pizza and we can watch a film. Your choice which," he instructs semi-sternly.
But I know I can say no if I want to.
"That sounds nice. Make sure you get some of those chicken wings the takeaway place does."
Mathias chuckles. "I wouldn't dream of ordering without them."
A small smile lifts the corners of my lips. Being around him is so easy and fills my world with a peace I've rarely experienced when I'm around other people. After sharing a room for so long, I'm surprised by how much I search out others to be around.
But maybe it's nothing to do with him. In all likelihood, I feel better because I'm the one in a better place, and the people I want to be around are people I enjoy spending time with.
The reasoning doesn't matter. At the end of the day, I like being around Mathias, and that's a good enough reason to do it for me.