Watcher by Holley Trent

CHAPTER FIVE

“I really didn’t mean it that way. Are you mad at me?” Leticia stuffed her dry dress and underwear beneath the passenger seat of the rental car and then pulled her seatbelt across her body. “I didn’t mean to imply that you were just trouble.”

“It’s all right.” He turned down the air conditioner’s aggressive fan and adjusted the rearview mirrors. “Maybe you didn’t mean it, but it’s true. I’m trouble. Ask your sister.”

“Which sister?”

“The one back in Norseton.”

“What does Lisa know that I don’t know? Or, for that matter, that Graciella doesn’t know?”

Jim did one of those eyebrow lifts that not-so-subtly translated into “Oh boy,” and Leticia decided she didn’t like that. The problem wasn’t that she preferred to not be able to read his expressions. She didn’t like thinking her sister had shielded her from something. That wasn’t Lisa’s job. It was up to Leticia to decide whether she wanted to consume the information meant for her—no one else.

“I’ll text her right now,” she said.

“Go ahead.”

“You’re not going to try to stop me?”

He cut her a look that was so loaded with dare that she had half a mind to call his bluff. That wasn’t the first time he’d looked at her that way. He’d done it back in the room a couple of times, too, and each time, her indignation had flared. Usually, she could ignore a challenge. She was easygoing by nature and had learned not to make too many other people’s problems her own as a kid. Dares were different coming from one’s husband, however.

They made her want to argue.

With…her husband, who she still didn’t remember acquiring, but apparently, that was the path Fate was employing for her. Leticia would go along with it because she couldn’t think of a single good reason not to.

“Don’t let that wolf in you make you pick a fight, darlin’,” Jim said. “I’m not sitting on your good side, and it wouldn’t be fair.”

Leticia went stiff as that pile of words sorted themselves in her brain. He’d mentioned her wolf, and she had no idea what her wolf had to do with anything. The beast had offered no insight. She wouldn’t even know if it had. Her inner wolf wasn’t articulate like her sisters’.

Then she went bleary-eyed as realization dawned. “I’m not sitting on your good side.”

There was the good reason for her to question Fate’s plans. Indignation flared in her, and her clear eyes narrowed.

He steered away from the rental agency’s curb and plopped the rental agreement onto the dashboard.

As they approached the exit gate, he didn’t say a word. Neither did she.

Graciella must have told him. I’m going to choke her until her eyes bulge.

Just beyond the theft-deterring spikes at the gatehouse, Jim put the car in park and tucked away the car paperwork. He set the GPS on his phone, adjusted the air conditioning, and lowered the radio volume.

She turned off the radio and folded her arms over her chest. “I don’t need you feeling sorry for me.”

“Who said I felt sorry for you?”

“You did when you said we couldn’t have a fair fight.”

Unstirred, he turned the radio back on. “Give me two minutes. I haven’t heard this song in twenty years.”

She gestured dramatically to the console. “By all means. Enjoy.”

Normally, she would have been ashamed about her acerbic mood, but the moment she’d strapped herself into that seat, she’d started feeling like shit. Ravenous for no reason and strangely itchy. She sat on her hands to stave off the urgent temptation she had to claw at her skin. Her face felt like layers of paint needed peeling off of it, and there was a powerful, pulsing ache behind her ribs. It’d been years since she’d experienced anything close. The last time, she’d been around eleven. She’d recently started her period. Her mother had told her it was just one of those things and that she should ignore it. The discomfort would go away when “it” stopped.

Her mother had never defined “It,” and Leticia hadn’t pressed because she’d been too miserable. But she’d forgotten it then, and maybe she could do it again. Taking a deep breath in, she closed her eyes and concentrated on Jim’s song. Whatever it was, she didn’t think she’d ever heard it. She recognized a lot of hip-hop, but nothing in the lyrics was standing out to her.

Must be from before my time.

When she opened her eyes again, the itching had abated somewhat. He was merging them into the flow of traffic heading away from the airport.

Two minutes later, he turned the radio off. “I believe you were blaming me for some shit a bit ago. Were you done, or do you have some more to say?”

“Who told you?” She turned toward him so she could watch his lips move. There was no point in making her life difficult if he already knew about her impairment.

“No one told me.”

“So, you just put two and two together?”

“You can be skeptical all you want. You’re entitled to that.”

“Maybe I told you last night and just can’t remember.”

“If that were the case, would you still be pissed about it?”

“I—” She clammed up because she actually didn’t know. Idly, she scratched the underside of her prickling wrist. The whole joint ached beneath the itch like she was going through another growth spurt. She was too old for those, so it couldn’t be that.

She didn’t even know why she’d floated the idea that she’d told him, except that she felt like she had no power in the situation.

His expression softened, and she wanted to despise him for thinking she needed that, but she couldn’t.

She just…couldn’t.

“You’re used to flying under the radar,” he said. “You’re not used to people paying enough attention to you to notice your habits.”

“And you’ve been doing that? Paying attention?”

“I pay attention.”

Those three words doused the lit dynamite in her, and instead, kindled something even more dangerous: worry.

“Stop.” That command of his came with the briefest cupping of her chin.

Curling her grip around her purse strap, she forced down a swallow. “So, you knew before yesterday?”

“A long time before yesterday.”

“And you didn’t…consider that when you married me?”

“Why?”

“You know why.” And she would never forgive him if he made her spell it out.

They’d come to a red light.

He stared straight ahead and drummed his fingertips atop the steering wheel.

Grappling with her amorphous emotions, she fidgeted with the corner of her thumbnail. She didn’t like to be left alone with her thoughts. She’d thought she did when she’d started living on her own but being around Jim had made her understand that what she’d really liked about that was the change aspect. She’d moved into a new phase of her life, and everything seemed to be a breathtaking new learning experience.

“Do you want to move on from this, or no?” Jim asked.

“No.” Her cheeks itched so bad.

“All right.”

If they were dwelling on the subject, Leticia couldn’t tell. He wasn’t saying a damn thing.

His phone rattled in the cupholder. He put it on speaker as the light turned green.

“Adam,” he greeted, and Leticia snapped to attention as though the man were standing right there beside her window.

“Where you at?” Alpha asked. “Can you talk?”

“Driving. Just left the rental agency. The rest are going to wait on flights. It’s just Leticia and me.”

“Shit.”

“What’s up?”

“Might have to go back to the drawing board on this, but I’ll float the scenario to you anyway and see if you’ve got ideas. You know anything about Petra’s phony mate calls?”

“Yeah, a little. Leticia was telling me about them earlier.”

“Okay, saves you from having to hear the backstory, then.”

“What happened?” Leticia asked with redirected alarm. “Did we mess something up? Oh my gods, please don’t tell me we made a problem for you.”

Alpha chuckled. “No, no. It’s all right. No need to put your worry pants on. Had a confab with the Afótama royals this morning, and they said to go ahead. If Wolves need urgent resettlement, we should go ahead and fetch them and figure out the backend business later on. That’s a standing edict. We won’t need to get permission for the next time.”

Oh.

Something Leticia had been a part of had turned out to be a “very good thing.” That spot of brightness was like a salve to her rebelling body. The aches and itches seemed to be in retreat.

“Did Petra have a hunch someone needed an immediate extraction?” Jim asked.

“That was what her gut said.”

“Where are they?” Jim asked.

“South Dakota.”

The network of muscles around Jim’s jaw hinge twitched, and his grip tightened so much around the steering wheel that it squeaked.

South Dakota? What’s wrong with South Dakota?

“Give me a minute.”

Leticia didn’t ask what was wrong when he pulled off the road and tapped on the hazard lights. She kept quiet even as he pinched the bridge of his nose and pushed out increasingly more ragged breaths.

Alpha may have claimed differently, but it seemed to Leticia that someone had definitely messed up. For the moment, she was choosing watchful patience. She was focusing on listening and learning, so her body’s annoyances stayed in the background of her thoughts.

“My thinking was that you could change your flight and get as close to there as you could,” Alpha said.

“Not out of Vegas. I checked everything departing from here, and nothing’s going to get me near.”

“How about out of Phoenix?”

“Not sure about that. You’ll have to look and tell me.”

“Let me get the team on it and call you back. I’ll try to get you home for at least some of your birthday.”

“Do what you have to, Adam. I can celebrate some other day. I’m used to it.”

“You shouldn’t have to be.”

Jim’s breathing had settled, but the tautness of his jaw remained.

Earlier, Leticia marveled at how smooth it looked and how much younger he appeared when he grinned. The agedness had returned, and she knew she was part of the reason.

She’d been told by plenty of Wolves in the past that she made them angry, or she made them do bad things, but none of them had been romantic partners. She didn’t even know if she could call him that. He’d certainly seemed to be in a hell of a hurry to ditch her in Vegas.

The yellowjackets were back in her brain and with sharpened stingers.

No!

She balled her hands into fists and tried to find some relevant thought to offer to the conversation. Whether they wanted her to be or not, she was a part of the mess.

“I don’t know a whole lot about them,” she announced. “The Wolves up there, I mean. Nothing beyond the usual rumors. You always have to be cautious with those.”

“I think any Wolf that has been on the road a while knows that’s a territory to avoid,” Alpha said. “It’s the Wild West up in those parts. I never let the boys take jobs there during our roaming years, even when we were hurting bad for the money.”

Leticia leaned forward, propping her elbows onto her knees. She gave her temples slow, gentle rubs and tried to order the scraps of information she’d haphazardly filed away in her brain. Perhaps one day, she’d be like Lisa and immediately know exactly what information was throwaway and what could potentially be critical. That took practice, though, and she hoped the pack would trust her enough to get it.

“I feel like I remember the message from the South Dakota woman,” she said. “She was light on details, and I distinctly recollect wondering if she was responding from someone’s account. Petra did a lookup on the phone number she left, and it belonged to a truck stop.”

“She might have found someone who felt sorry enough for her to let her send the note through their email,” Alpha said.

Felt sorry enough…

Grimacing, Petra put her head against the rest.

She’d been so worried about how Jim might treat her if he knew about her ear that she hadn’t let herself believe that he’d see her the same way he saw every other refugee that ended up at Norseton.

She’d never wanted anyone to think she was special. She’d felt like other people were more deserving, but that was what she was. That didn’t mean she was going to be handled like delicate pottery. Acknowledging differences was just the first step to creating equity. There were probably allowances made for every single one of Norseton’s Wolves, and it was perhaps time Leticia sought hers.

“Okay, give me a minute.” Alpha disconnected.

Leticia suddenly wanted the radio back on and turned up loud. The terrible noise would at least be something to react to. At least she would be doing something then and not wondering if Jim was giving the side of her face that hard Wolf stare or if he was thinking of new ways to ignore her.

The fact of the matter was that she was sitting in that rental vehicle next to her husband, and she didn’t know if she was angry or sad or excited or just stupid.

Things had been so sweet and easy for Graciella and Finn. The energy between Leticia and Jim felt like cold umbrage. There was nothing sweet about that ache in her gut or the quickness of her heart.

She put her hand over it and closed her eyes.

This doesn’t feel right.

Jim’s phone rang once before he answered. “Adam.”

Leticia breathed, grateful for the interloper.

“Hey, listen. We can get Leticia on a flight into Albuquerque this evening if —”

“No,” she said with more intensity than she’d intended, and her heartbeat quickened even more. One simply didn’t tell Adam Carbone “No,” and definitely not like that.

“You didn’t even let me finish.”

“No,” she repeated, or maybe it was the yellowjackets calling out in a singular voice. She couldn’t think straight with all the upheaval surging in her body.

Defying the discomfort, she twined her fingers and stared out her window. The view wasn’t impressive. There was a warehouse to her right. The blandness of scenery made it easier for her brain to process sounds.

“Uh. Okay.” Alpha sounded genuinely perplexed, which Leticia had never heard from him before. “So, you staying in Vegas for another night?”

“No,” she heard herself saying, almost as though she’d drifted out of her body and some other entity had taken control of her vocal cords. “I don’t know if you heard,” the voice continued, “but I got married yesterday. To him. Jim.”

She looked at Jim then, or that combative part of her that needed to push and not just be told what to do.

He was wearing his “Watcher” face: inquiring eyes, but everything else was “I really don’t care.”

Well, I care, motherfucker.

Alpha was silent.

Leticia fidgeted with her ring and snapped her gaze back to the warehouse wall. “We were actually in the middle of a conversation about how long he’s known I can’t hear out of one ear when you called.”

Alpha still had nothing to say.

Jim’s whispered warning of “Leticia” hit her right side sounding like “Tish.”

She hated that she kind of liked “Tish.” That was what Gomez called Morticia sometimes.

Gomez and Morticia Addams were in love, though. Thoroughly, terribly, eternally in love. Leticia was too inconvenient to love. And perhaps too young. He’d somewhat alluded to that.

Any excuse not to have me.

“So, you need time to have a conversation or something?” Alpha asked. “Is that what you’re telling me?”

“Or something,” Jim muttered.

Leticia scoffed.

Stop it.

She hadn’t meant to do that, but it’d just come out. She was going to be in such deep shit if Lisa found out she’d disrespected their alpha.

“So, I shouldn’t try to put the two of you on a flight, then? I was going to tell you to drive into Salt Lake City and fly up to Rapid City from there.”

“I don’t want her anywhere near South Dakota,” Jim said.

“I’m not a child, Jim,” Leticia snapped. She looked at him because she had to, and there was fire in those all-seeing eyes.

“No, you’re not a fucking child, but you are my wife. I don’t want you in South Dakota.”

“Oh, so you don’t think I can take care of myself?”

Jim huffed and shifted the SUV out of park. “What the fuck is this mood of yours?”

“Maybe it’s my Norseton Pack’s Worst Wife and Worst Wolf mood. Hmm?”

He made a new face. It was a “what in the fresh hell” face.

She folded her arms over her chest and smiled contentedly as she stared through the windshield.

The yellowjackets had liked that. She wasn’t the predictable babe he’d thought he bargained for. In fact, she was a terror. That was a new role for her, but at that moment, she was enjoying it.

Once back in the flow of traffic, heading toward Salt Lake City, he said, “I’m not used to having to explain every move I make. I work in silence, and people tend to let me do my job. There’s a reason Adam called me and not one of the Wolves on the ground right now in Norseton. Isn’t there, Alpha?”

Leticia had never heard Alpha sigh before that moment.

That’s…not a good thing.

That scared the yellowjackets into silence. In fact, it chased them out of her head entirely, like a killing frost.

“Go on and tell her. Let her hear it from you, so she knows you’re fine with it.”

“You sure?” Alpha asked.

“Have at it. She’s seen me with my clothes off. What’s one more piece of naked truth?”

Leticia tried to read Jim’s face for any clues whatsoever about what kind of bomb Alpha was going to drop on her, but he’d neutralized his expression again. He looked like the Jim she knew from two days before who never had more than a sentence to say to her. He didn’t look like the Jim who’d smiled at her and offered to do her laundry.

That Jim hadn’t lasted long.

“Leticia, there are…a few Wolves out there who can break their shapeshifts,” Alpha said.

“Break a shapeshift?” She repeated the words a few times in her head, trying to puzzle together what they meant in that order. That phrasing was new for her. A glance at Jim gave no context. “I heard you, but I don’t understand what you mean.”

“Meaning he can start and decide not to finish. Or he can start and decide he doesn’t want to be his usual wolf. He might want to be someone else’s wolf. Or someone else’s…person.”

“Someone else’s… What does that mean?”

Still no clues from Jim. His focus was on the road.

“I mean he can control the end result. He can shift to look like any other Wolf he’s seen. Or if he’s having a really good day, any other man as well. He can get into places no one else can. By the time folks realize his scent and mannerisms are wrong, it’s too late. He’s already gone. He’s gotta be really focused to be that good, Leticia. Do you understand?”

Something compelled her to look at Jim one more time. She almost missed the tell, but there it was—the briefest creasing of his forehead and pull of tension in his jaw.

Understanding dawned on her like the sun on the other side of a storm-filled night.

He was…something else. Something that wasn’t like her or anyone else at Norseton. A powerful anomaly in a pack full of frightening anomalies.

And he’d married her—a woman who knew absolutely nothing about anything that mattered. He was holding her out at arm’s distance, but he had made that trip down the altar. No one had forced him to buy those rings.

If he hadn’t been hers, she would have been terrified of him and his rare magic. She would have stayed away from a Wolf like him.

He…married me. He wanted…me?

Apparently, he did.

That was why he was so careful.

So slow with her.

If she were there, tagging along to South Dakota to soothe an ego that had somehow become malignant, he would fail.

That was what Alpha was warning of. Jim would fail because his focus would be on her.

She’d make what would otherwise be a straightforward mission dangerous for him simply because some part of her had felt compelled to argue.

Why? Why argue?

The impatient response in her mind was “Because,” but Leticia didn’t put that word there. That wasn’t hers, so she ignored it.

She wouldn’t be the worst Wolf and wife in Norseton. She’d learned ages ago how to be a good packmate, and she could be that for her husband as well, even if she couldn’t really understand him, or even herself lately.

“Take me back to the hotel, Jim,” she said quietly. “I’ll wait for a flight with my sister.”

And maybe try to screw my head back on. What is wrong with me?