Hateful by Eden Beck

Chapter Five

“We should head to the assembly,”Rafael says nonchalantly as he tosses me a banana. I stare longingly at the little cupcake on his plate as he sits across from me. I’ve never wanted a cupcake so much in my life, but I can practically feel my hips starting to sway beneath where I’m seated in the dining hall.

As if to mock me further, my stomach lets out an enormous rumble. I’m not even hungry. I filled up on greens and chicken since I’m not exactly trying to starve myself, even if my stomach would like me to think that I’m going to die if I don’t just eat the damn cupcake.

Rafael is staring at me when I finally look away from the dessert and up at him.

“Is it important, like, at all? Can’t I just skip it?”

Rafael shrugs. “It’s about time to do the annual competition against the girls’ school.”

I peel my banana with a sigh. “How is it we interact so much with the girls’ school, yet they’re not mentioned anywhere in the brochures?”

Would have saved me a lot of trouble if I’d found out about them instead of Bleakwood in the first place. Though then again … I probably wouldn’t have gotten in there if what Dean Robin said is true.

There’d have been no point in her getting me into her school. As long as I’m here at Bleakwood, she can use me.

“Well, it’s not really official. It’s just kind of for fun,” Rafael says. “Or what passes for fun around here.”

“So it’s not that important, then?” I say. My gaze has wandered over to the door. It’d be nice to get away from everyone for one afternoon. I might have just gotten here, but I could use a moment to clear my head. I need to get back into school mode. Into boy Alex mode. I need a moment to put myself together and decide what my next step is now that The Brotherhood seems to be done with me.

But Rafael doesn’t seem as quick to brush this assembly away as I am. “Oh, no, we all take it very seriously.”

I pause mid-bite to look at him in exasperation.

Rafael gives me a rakish grin and sets his sandwich aside. “You have siblings, right?”

“Four brothers.”

His eyebrows shoot up. “Really? Wow.” He shakes his head. “Anyway. It’s a sibling rivalry kind of thing. Sure, it’s not official, but it’s very competitive.”

The last time I saw him this excited he was planning what turned out to be a very surprising school dance. The least I can do now is humor him, at least until I’ve heard a little more about this so-called competition between the schools.

“So,” I ask, “what do we normally do? What’s this whole thing about?”

“Sports stuff mostly. Tournaments. Sometimes other clubs get involved—I heard one year they had a cooking contest.”

I pat my stomach sadly, my eyes continuing to wander across the dining hall to people’s desserts. “I hope it’s not that this year.”

Now that would be torture.

Rafael just shrugs. “Usually The Brotherhood represents Bleakwood, so I agree. Don’t want to see the mess Jasper would whip up in the kitchen.”

I wrinkle my nose and bite into my banana. At least that means they won’t bother me as much. That could explain the way they’re all ignoring me now. Maybe Jasper has convinced them to focus on these games … or maybe they didn’t need convincing at all.

Maybe bullying me was just another diversion, and now … well … that diversion has been replaced by a new one.

I let my gaze settle on the three of them, all on the other side of the hall, sitting at the same table. Jasper looks better than he did this morning. He’s livelier, smiling, joking even. Heath is doing most of the talking, as per usual. He picks up his fork and gestures wildly with it, then mimes some sort of swordfight until Beck cracks up beside him, his cheeks lifting to make his eyes squint.

“Earth to Alex?”

I tear my eyes away and take another bite of my banana. “As long as I don’t have to compete or see the headmistress, I’m fine.”

Rafael nods sagely. “Then you better stay out of The Brotherhood’s way. They’re avoiding you now, but they marked you at the beginning of the year. You know the other shoe’s gonna drop soon.”

I bristle as I look back over them. All three of them are laughing now. If I didn’t know better, I’d think they were normal, everyday boys. Innocent. Fun-loving. Good-natured.

My face twists into a scowl.

Rafael might say that, but he doesn’t know what Jasper did. He doesn’t know what Jasper knows.

With my salad and banana scarfed down and my trash tossed into a garbage bin, I exit the dining hall in Rafael’s wake just as the PA system announces that we need to report to the assembly hall. Rafael raises his eyebrows at me in a very “I told you so” sort of gesture.

“Are you gonna be on the committee for this too?” I ask him.

“No,” he replies flatly. “I had enough drama with the dance committee. I’m not doing something with this much pressure on it.”

I nod. Last semester at the catastrophic winter dance, Rafael was on the committee organizing the whole thing. For him, it was at least mildly successful.

I, on the other hand, got chased into an abandoned classroom and almost beaten to death … and more. I still wonder what would have happened if Jasper hadn’t discovered I was a girl.

He’d gone into a frenzy, the details of which still seem blurry in my head. I know what he was thinking of doing. I know he wanted to hurt me, to humiliate me … but he didn’t.

Not entirely, anyway.

Not before he was startled out of his rage and the shame of what he was trying to do overwhelmed him.

I just didn’t expect that shame to last. Not with Jasper. Not when I’ve seen the things he’s capable of in just a few short months.

My stomach clenches as we enter the assembly hall and I catch Jasper out of the corner of my eye. To my surprise, his eyes meet mine for just a moment before he wrenches them away, pulling Heath and Beck with him as he marches in the opposite direction as I’m heading. I should be okay with that, right? I should be glad he’s avoiding me.

But it stings.

It feels like I’ve been cast aside. But cast aside by … what?

“Oh look, it’s Neville.” Beside me, Rafael grabs my arm and starts tugging me across the assembly hall to a group of seats near the nerdiest-looking boy I’ve ever seen. He smiles shyly at us as we slide in beside him.

“Hey, Rafael,” Neville says quietly.

“Hey there. Seen anybody else?”

“No. Fox isn’t here yet.”

I watch them talk out of the corner of my eye, pretending not to be interested, but I’m honestly intrigued. They’re talking to each other as though they kept in touch over Christmas break. Rafael didn’t keep in touch with me over Christmas break.

I know I’m just being some kind of extra sensitive, so I force the thought away and scan the rest of the room. I see some familiar-looking classmates other than The Brotherhood, who have seats near the front. There are a plethora of older students that I don’t recognize. The stage has a podium with a microphone on it, but is otherwise empty—that is, until a group of school administrators, including our dean, walks onto it.

Dean Robin, is with them.

I feel myself clench. Her eyes sweep across the crowd and find me easily; our gazes lock, and it feels like she’s boring straight into me.

Unlike The Brotherhood, it doesn’t look like she’s ready to move on from me. Not when there’s something she needs from me.

I just don’t know what that is yet.

A squeal of microphone feedback cuts through the chatter in the hall and Dean Robin winces, so I’m spared her gaze for now. Dean Withers clears his throat, looking embarrassed.

“Sorry about that,” he says. His voice echoes around the hall though the crackling microphone. “Anyway—as the upperclassmen will already know, it’s time for our annual competition with the girls’ school, headed by Headmistress Robin.”

The head of the girl’s school masks her grimace with a polite smile, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. She hates being called “headmistress”.

It’s a fact that is not missed by anyone here … which makes Dean Withers’ use of it all the more insulting.

Our dean rambles on for some time about things like sportsmanship, good will, working together … those sorts of things, until he finally comes to the subject that everyone is actually here for—the subject of the first challenge between the schools.

“As it’s still cold, the first event will be an indoor puzzle challenge.”

“That sounds lame,” I sigh to Rafael, who nods. He’s already pulled out his notebook and has begun doodling a rude drawing of the man on stage.

“It will be held here, in the gymnasium in a few weeks,” the dean continues, unaware that beside me, Rafael has drawn him with spittle flying out of his mouth. “In a few days’ time, there will be posters and flyers with more details posted around the school. There will be specific dates, times, and methods for applying to compete.”

What a joke. We all know who’s actually going to be competing.

And from the pinched up look on Dean Robin’s face, so does she.

I stop paying attention and start watching Rafael’s drawing take shape. I don’t care about this competition nonsense, especially if The Brotherhood is going to be representing Bleakwood. I just need to focus on my grades.

The dean drones on about some other announcements—something about some hiking trails outside the school, menu changes in the dining hall—stuff that I don’t care enough about to pay any attention. I’m so absorbed in the sketches unfolding on Rafael’s paper that I’m startled when he snaps his notebook shut and stands up.

“Let’s go,” he says with yet another sigh.

I stand beside him, slightly disoriented, and look around the room. All around me students are getting to their feet to head back to their classes. My eyes flick up toward the stage. Dean Robin still stands there, arms folded.

And once again, she’s looking directly at me.

My stomach churns at the sight of her. I duck behind Neville, shielding myself from her sight, and shuffle out behind him.

“You okay?” Neville asks concernedly as I crouch next to him.

“I’m fine.” I glance over his shoulder. The girls’ dean has disappeared from the stage, so I’m clear. For now.

She knows where to find me, so I know it’s just a matter of time until she does.

Neville, Rafael, and I let the crowd carry us out of the assembly hall and into the corridor outside. I shrug my backpack onto my shoulders and tug on the straps.

“So, next class?”

Rafael stops. “I think someone might want to talk to you,” he says, nodding ahead of us.

And it seems that time is now.

Somehow, Dean Robin has already found me. She saunters toward us with her heels clicking across the tiled floor, reminding me in a way of how Olive used to do it whenever she was around baiting Jasper by flirting with me. I look around frantically for escape routes, but there are students everywhere.

I can’t exactly hide, but I can attach myself to a group moving past. I can make it difficult for her to catch me without making a scene. And that, I think, is something that neither of us wants.

I don’t want to talk to her. Right before I left last semester, she said something about me helping her, trying to get some dirt on Bleakwood. I’m not ready to do that. I don’t want to. I only agreed so she wouldn’t expose the fact that I’m a girl and get me expelled.

She doesn’t seem like the kind of person I want to get overly involved with. But she also seems like the kind of woman that I don’t want to cross.

“Mr. Trevellian! It’s good to see you.”

I freeze, my face forming a rigid smile out of habit. “Hi, Headmistress Robin.”

“Dean Robin,” she corrects me, coming to stand in front of me. I see a flicker on her face for a moment when I use the insulting term. It slipped out in the moment I turned to address her. My own little rebellion.

It’s a small thing, and one that leaves me feeling the littlest bit guilty. But I like how it sounds rolling off my tongue, so I make up my mind here and now that she’s Headmistress from here on out.

She’s still staring at me with those piercing eyes of hers. “How was your break?”

“Fine,” I say, shuffling my posture so that I’m still slowly moving away from her.

She doesn’t reply, and I let the silence between us stretch out for as long as I can stand it. I don’t have anything to say to her. I can force her to take the initiative.

Finally, she sighs and says, “I was wondering if you’d have time—”

I’m steeling myself up to just agree, to face this surely inevitable thing when suddenly Rafael comes to my rescue.

“Alex, we need to get going,” Rafael interrupts her, seizing me by the elbow. “You know how our professor gets when we’re even a little bit late for class.”

“Right,” I reply gratefully, taking a whole step back away from her this time. No more timid shuffle. “Nice seeing you, Headmistress.”

“Dean,” she calls after me as we rush past her.

Neville follows in our wake, stumbling over his own feet. “Don’t you have a free period after this?” he asks Rafael curiously.

“Just keep walking, Neville.”

The three of us push down the hallway before darting around a corner toward a nearly deserted corridor.

“Thanks,” I pant as Rafael releases me. “I owe you.”

He shrugs. “Not a big deal. I lie about stuff all the time.” He gazes past me toward the main corridor, where the throng of students still pulses. “You’re going to have to talk to her, eventually.”

“I know,” I sigh. I lean against the wall and run my fingers through my short, choppy hair. “But I’d like to avoid her for at least a week.”

“She’s going to be here often. She takes a huge part in the planning of the whole competition.”

I groan, my fingers still twisting through my hair.

Neville watches us in confusion. “What’s wrong with the headmistress lady? Why does she wanna talk to you so badly?”

Rafael sighs. “Just go to class, Neville.”

Frowning, Neville does as he’s told. I watch his back disappear into the crowd. I’m jealous of how freely he can walk around.

Rafael pats my arm. “You need to figure out how you’re going to handle all this.”

“I am handling it,” I say, a little snappier than I intended.

He nods. “Okay then. I’m going back to the dorm.”

“Sure.”

He walks away. I’m not handling anything, and he knows it.

So, I guess that means at least one of us does.