A Curvy Girl for the Prince by S.E. Law

9

Matilda

Ihack at the steaming dirt beneath my feet, trying not to breathe in the fumes. The earth beneath the pick cracks open, revealing luminescent shimmers of some strange, unearthly material. Clearly, it’s toxic because nothing natural looks like that. I raise my hand, and a droid floats over with a camera, which it aims at the bubbly liquid.

“Affirmative,” it says in a flat voice, clicking on the shutter. “Shovel, please.”

Another droid floats over with a shovel in its mechanical claw, which it hands to me.

“Collect and retrieve,” it commands. “Agent 2-6-1 reporting.”

I take the shovel and begin hacking away at the soil again. Meanwhile, women all around me toil in similar conditions. My back aches, my hair sticks to my forehead, and I’m dressed in dirty rags. I’ve been sent to the Colonies for no reason whatsoever. I don’t get it, and wonder what I did to deserve this.

After all, I was kidnapped during a date with Albert Ray, and I still don’t understand why. Everything seemed fine. I showed up at the bowling alley, and Albert was courteous. Friendly, even. But then, some crazy manager offered me new bowling shoes, and when I woke up, I was hog-tied in the back of a van, while Albert regarded me from a hard metal seat bolted to the vehicle wall.

“So you’re Haakon’s whore,” he said in a flat tone.

I blinked at him, stunned, but I couldn’t say a word because I was gagged. What the hell? How rude! Fortunately, he unfastened the handkerchief around my mouth, and I coughed a few times before throwing him an evil glare.

“I’m not anyone’s whore,” I spit. “Besides, who the hell are you? What the fuck are you doing? I’m going to tell my parents.”

Albert’s expression didn’t change, and it was eerie.

“You’ll do no such thing,” he said. “Because you’re headed to the Colonies.”

I gasped.

“What? Do your parents know you’re doing this? Is this some kind of joke?”

Albert merely shrugged and looked around with disinterest. It’s mind-boggling how someone so handsome can appear cold and cruel at the same time, his blue eyes lifeless.

“Actually, this was my dad’s idea. John’s got some plan to overthrow the monarchy and take over the country himself.”

I stare.

“Are you serious? Your dad wants to start a revolution? He’s going to make himself King?”

Albert shrugs, again with total disinterest.

“Yeah, I guess so. And after we figured out that you’re Haakon’s whore, we hatched a plan. Haakon’s going to come and save you from the Colonies, and that’s when my dad is going to strike. While the throne is unprotected, John’s going to move in and seize the crown. It’ll be a coup d’état.”

I goggled at him.

“Holy shit,” was my whisper. “I can’t believe it.”

My date merely shrugged again.

“Yeah, whatevs. My dad’s always up to something. World domination is his goal, so what did you expect?”

I could hardly think, but then Albert slapped me across the face hard, knocking me out. When I woke up, the feckless boy was gone. Now, I toil in the pits of the Colonies. The wind howls as it blows over the mines, and the sun is a hazy orange from all sorts of toxic fumes. I sure as hope that I don’t die because I have no doubt that we’re being exposed to poisonous chemicals, seeing that the skin on my hands is peeling, and that I have constant mucus clogging my lungs. Furthermore, we’re monitored all the time, but not by people. The overseers use floating droids that watch every move, their artificial eyes unblinking.

But then I get an idea. Speaking under my breath, I address the girl next to me. Darcy and I have become “friendly” even if we’re not exactly friends. After all, who could make friends in a terrible place like this?

“Darcy, is that droid malfunctioning?” I mutter under my breath.

She pushes the hair back from her grimy face, pausing for a moment in her work. She’s an attractive woman from rural America, and I’ve never asked how she came to be in the Colonies. But sometimes, when we lie in our bunks at night, she tells me of her family’s farm, and how idyllic it is. Evidently, Darcy lives there with her dad, and has fond memories of milking cows, mucking out stalls, and churning butter. It sounds like a crazy lifestyle to me, but when I tell her stories of my time at the palace, it sounds just as insane to her.

Darcy glances at the droid.

“No, I think the robot’s fine,” she murmurs back. “Why?”

I eye the droid from under my lashes, and watch as it hovers unsteadily in the air.

“Well, I think these two droids are glitching,” I mutter. “See how the red light in front blinks?”

Darcy pauses in her work again, trying not to stare.

“Yes, why?”

I pause again.

“Well, because I think we could ride them to Lysenia. We could make an escape.”

That makes my new friend break form, and she shoots me a bewildered look.

“Are you kidding, Matilda? What are you smoking? Lysenia is thousands of miles away, and how would we even steal one of these things?”

I shake my head.

“I have a plan,” I whisper. “All we have to do is get onto the droids, and see what happens.”

She squints.

“Yeah, but do you even know the way to Lysenia? We’re in the Colonies, girlfriend. This is thousands of miles away from civilization.”

I nod.

“Yes, but you see, I don’t think we’re in the original Colonies. I think this is a satellite location and we may be only fifty miles or so from the kingdom. At least, that’s what I overheard the guards saying the other day.”

Darcy shakes her head.

“I don’t know about you Europeans,” she mutters. “This place is fucked up, that’s all I know.”

I nod, before flinging a pile of the toxic dirt over my shoulder.

“But do you want to try at least? I mean, we can’t stay here forever. You keep saying that some evil ranchers want to take over your family farm, so you need to get back to America to save it! Besides, what happens if we try to escape and fail? They’ll just bring us back to the Colonies, and we’ll start all over again. See? We have nothing to lose.”

Darcy stares at me, her brown eyes wide.

“They could execute us for trying to escape, Matilda,” she says in a low tone. “You forgot that.”

I nod.

“Yeah, but we might as well try, right? If we stay here any longer, we’re going to die from exposure to poisonous chemicals anyways. Come on, let’s give it a go. I’ve been watching these two droids for a while, and they’re definitely glitching. Come on,” I coax. “This is our chance!”

Darcy’s still unconvinced, however.

“I don’t know,” she hems and haws.

“Well, I’m going to do it,” I say with conviction in my voice. Then, without waiting for her reply, I beckon to one of the droids.

“Agent 2-7-1,” I say. “I need a moment.”

The droid floats over. It’s about the size of a large vacuum cleaner and hovers over the ground, its eye unblinking.

“What is your question?”

I feign an injury and double over, clutching my ankle.

“Can you take me to the medical tent? I twisted my ankle shoveling this toxic stew, and I need to see a doctor. Owww!” I howl piteously. “Please.”

The droid assesses my leg, and then lowers itself to the ground.

“Transport available,” it intones in a robotic voice. “Step aboard.”

I gingerly hoist myself onto the droid, straddling it like a bronco. Then it lifts in the air as I wink at Darcy.

“I’ll be right back,” I whisper at my friend. But as we levitate and begin to soar over the toxic fields, something horrific happens. One of the guards sees me, and the dark figure zooms over the fields towards us, bent on interception. Oh shit. My plan has failed before it’s even begun, and now I’m going to be shipped off to the real Colonies for sure.