Sign Me Up by Dulcie Dameron
Jamie
on an outing this week,” Stefan says, addressing the room with his hands planted on his hips. “I think we’re all still a little bit frazzled after last week’s…incident…” Thankfully, he doesn’t meet my eyes, or anyone’s eyes for that matter, when he says it.
“But we’re still going to be doing a team-building activity,” he finishes, scanning each of our faces. It almost looks like he’s waiting for one of us to put up a fight. If we do, will he put down a mark against us?
Probably.
The Sign Language interpreter stands off to Stefan’s right with a bright smile on her face the whole time she signs. I don’t dislike the woman. She’s pleasant, friendly. But her eyes sparkle when she looks at Parker and for some reason, that gives me indigestion. My intense reaction is concerning, honestly.
As I silently wonder if I should see a doctor about my sudden condition, Stefan waves Jordy forward. She brings over a wooden chair, then sets it down directly in front of Stefan, waving her hands Vanna White style as she backs away.
“Today we’re going to be building some trust among our team members,” Stefan says, gripping the back of the chair with both hands. A guffaw works its way up my throat, but before I release it, I bite my cheek to keep it inside. He’s literally never referred to us as team members before. Welcome back, Cyborg Stefan.
“This chair represents the level of trust I expect you all to have for each other.” As soon as he says it, my eyes dart to Parker, whose gaze is already fixed on me. His eyes are wide as he blinks slowly. Stefan can’t possibly expect us to…
“And each of you,” Stefan continues with a gleeful smile in his voice, “will be displaying that trust when you fall backwards into the awaiting arms of the rest of your team members.”
My stomach bottoms out. Noooooo.
Parker moves in closer to my side, leaning down and making the sign for Why?
I hold up my hands with a look that says, how would I know?
The interpreter’s smile grows tight as if she’s as unsure about this little trust fall experiment as we are. Gladys raises her hand, then speaks without waiting to be called upon.
“I can’t climb onto that chair. I’ve got bad knees.” She raises one obstinate eyebrow as if daring Stefan to object to her claim.
“Well, you’ll still be a perfect candidate to catch your teammates.”
She purses her lips, her coral lipstick crinkling into the lines around her mouth. “I’ve got bad elbows too.”
Stefan jingles his keys in his pants pockets. “Gladys, you’re participating and that’s final.”
Her shoulders rise and fall on a deep exhale, but she makes no other moves to argue.
“Um, excuse me, Mr. Sanders?” Lucas interjects. “I’m a little uncomfortable putting my trust in others when my safety is on the line. Is there any way we could cushion the floor before we begin?”
Our boss releases a weary sigh. “I’ve already thought of that but thank you for admitting that you don’t trust your co-workers.” Lucas sputters while Stefan motions Jordy over once more. She drags over a long, padded mat that looks like it came straight from a kid’s gymnastics class. Maybe he borrowed it from his new friend, Miss Fowler.
At least now that we have a padded fall, I know my boss isn’t completely insane.
Stefan goes on to explain exactly where he wants everyone to stand while the lucky guinea pig gets to position themselves on the chair and fall backwards. Into the arms of everyone else. Hopefully.
Anxiety buzzes along my skin like an itchy rash as I tune out, utterly dazed after the odd weekend I’ve had and now this. First the family dinner at Parker’s parents’ home. It was awesome at first but left off on a weird note. Plus, there’s this stilted…something…between us today that I can’t quite put my finger on. Then, there was the upheaval of my Saturday morning routine thanks to Mike. And the subsequent conversation and invitation he laid on me afterward.
I still haven’t explained it all to Parker. Every time I tried, the words got lodged in my throat. I know he’s not going to be happy that I entertained Mike at all, let alone told him I’d consider his offer.
Mercifully, Stefan announces he will be going first to demonstrate his trust in us, his employees. Which honestly feels a little convenient. There isn’t a soul in this office that’s not going to try and keep him from falling to his death. Hello, he signs our paychecks!
We all gather around the kindergarten play mat, as previously instructed, and hold out our arms. Parker takes a spot right next to me and his skin brushes mine, sending little electric tingles spreading through me.
I shouldn’t be having these types of thoughts about him when I already know that crossing the line of friendship would ruin us…But he’s just so warm and sweet…
“Ready?” Stefan calls out, looking down over his shoulder at us. I swing my gaze over the people standing around me. Glady’s arms are barely extended out in front of her, while the sheen of sweat that lines Lucas’s brow says he’s as nervous as I feel. Eric’s tongue is sticking out in concentration and Les stands, legs spread, at the ready. And me and Parker? Well, I think we’re just both praying for a miracle.
“Here I go!”
That’s the last thing our misguided boss says before falling backward into Les’s face, busting open his lip, breaking his nose, and knocking him unconscious.
“I don’t even know what to say,” I whisper to Parker as I take a sip from my giant water jug. “I mean, I knew it was going to be bad but…that bad?” I cringe again, thinking of how blood dripped from poor Les’s messed up face while we all worked to get it under control. Parker sits on the floor of my cubicle, legs crossed, with an equally horrified expression.
I guess some mental images just can’t be erased.
If Stefan thought that innocent little kid sticking a paperclip into the electrical socket was a lawsuit waiting to happen, he’s got to know this is much, much worse. As far as the rest of us are concerned, he knowingly endangered his employees with this little trust fall nonsense.
I feel bad for him, Parker signs.
“Who? Les?”
Surprisingly, Stefan. I think he’s been genuine in trying to bring the employees together even though nothing has gone the way he planned.
I lift one shoulder in a half-hearted shrug. “I get that, I do. But if I were him, I’d have taken one look at our group as a whole and known that this team-building stuff would never work.”
That’s because you’re a realist.
I scoff a laugh. “A realist or a pessimist?” I shake my head at myself. It’s true that I try to look at things from a practical perspective, but it’s also true that lately, a certain kind of jadedness has colored my interactions with almost everyone.
I don’t want to be perpetually annoyed, but losing Pops as my support system with all the other weird stuff going on lately has sent me into a grump slump.
Parker rests a hand on my knee and his warmth seeps through my black dress pants almost instantaneously. After a moment, he signs, You are too hard on yourself.
My lips turn upward a little, but before they stretch any further, a delivery girl skips up to my cubicle with a large bouquet of flowers. “Delivery for Jamie DeFreese,” she says in a sing-song voice with a smile aimed straight at me.
“Umm, o-okay. Thanks.” I tentatively take the flowers and shoot a quick glance at Parker. His confused expression tells me these definitely aren’t from him. Not that I thought they would be. We. Are. Friends.
“Have a nice day,” the young girl chimes as she takes off back toward the hall.
I scan the flowers for the small card I know is attached and my breath catches when I see who it’s from. Jamie, the card reads. I know you’re still unsure about us, but please believe me when I say that I’ve never been more sure. You’re the one for me. I’m sorry I couldn’t see it sooner. -Mike.
“Mike sent me flowers.” My toneless explanation garners a hissing sound from Parker I’ve never heard him make before.
Lifting my focus from the flowers, I see that he’s annoyed by the tightness in his shoulders and the muscles bulging in his neck. It’s then I remember that I was supposed to explain to him what happened this weekend.
I set the flowers on my desk, then sign to Parker, “I saw Mike this weekend.” I watch his reaction closely, but other than the slight downturn of his mouth, nothing in his expression changes.
I turn toward Beatrice and run one of her thick leaves in between my fingers while I gather the courage to tell him. “Mike texted and called me on Saturday morning, waking me up,” I say while signing, making sure my voice is low enough that no one nearby my cubicle would be able to overhear. Parker leans down, paying attention.
“He begged to see me,” I continue. “And before you go getting mad at me for giving into him, I made sure and told him I wasn’t comfortable having brunch with him. I only wanted a short meeting where he could say what he wanted to say.”
The slightest lift of Parker’s lips gives me the courage to continue.
“So, he met me at Greg’s tent. And then proceeded to hug me and tell me I looked better than ever, which totally weirded me out. I finally just made him spit it all out. He apologized for not treating me right when we were together and told me he’s been thinking a lot about settling down.”
I pause before relaying the last part of the story. “And he asked me to go with him to a work party where his boss and all of their clients will be in attendance.”
Parker looks down at his shoes, the muscles in his jaw feathering as he flicks the laces over and over. When he looks away, it’s his tell that he doesn’t want to hear the rest of what I have to say. And knowing this nearly breaks my heart. He’s genuinely concerned for me when it comes to Mike. And rightfully so, I guess.
But there’s also a hint of something more in his reaction. Something that I weirdly wish was jealousy. Maybe if he was bothered by Mike the way I get bothered by his sweet little interpreter, maybe I wouldn’t feel so lousy about the way I feel when she’s around.
I gently nudge his knee with my shoe, and he meets my eyes. “I told him I could never go with him to a party like that as his date when I didn’t have romantic feelings for him anymore.”
Something akin to hope alights in Parker’s eyes as he stares at me. It unsettles me so much, I almost forget what I was going to say next.
What did he say? he asks.
“He said he was disappointed but that he completely understood. And then he asked me out on an actual date.”
Parker gives me a slow nod as one of his dark eyebrows quirks, waiting for more, I’m sure.
“I told him I wasn’t interested,” I say. “But before he left, he asked me to just think about it. He said he wants me to consider him as a boyfriend again before I outright reject him.”
Did you say you would?
I shrug. “What was I supposed to say? I’m not heartless, Parker. Besides, we dated for seven months. That’s the longest I’ve ever been with a guy. And if I’m being honest, I miss having someone like that.”
I understand, he signs with what I know is a forced smile. You’re a good person.
My heart stutters when he stands and pulls me into a tight hug. If I’m such a good person, then why does telling Parker about Mike make me feel so…wrong?