Sheriff’s Pregnant Ex by Leslie North

9

Caitlin ran into the lake until it deepened and then swam as she tried to put distance between herself and Brian. The cool water did nothing to calm her emotions. Brian had cared for her, apparently deeply, back when they were in college? That was a revelation. They’d been good together, and she’d thought she was in love with him. But he’d loved her?

No, he hadn’t said that, not in so many words. He’d said he wanted more, which could mean so many different things. But the possibility of it all made her heart hurt. What if they’d had an honest conversation about their feelings for each other back then? What if she’d willingly gone to the party at the Thorne Ranch—or even explained her reasons instead of assuming he’d understand? What if she’d fought against their breakup?

She paused, treading water for a minute as she struggled to get her bearings. Brian was swimming toward her, his strokes powerful as he ate up the distance between them. Panic like she’d felt on shore overtook her again and she set out away from him, pouring her energy into cutting through the water while trying to stave off the thoughts bombarding her.

Had she thrown love away? But no, no. It would never have worked between them. Brian loved Darby Crossing and couldn’t wait to return to their hometown. She had only painful memories associated with where she’d grown up and couldn’t imagine a life for herself here. She’d wanted the wide world, not just a corner of it. And that hadn’t changed. He would never leave, and she wouldn’t stay. She’d kidded him that he was married to the town, but it was true. She, on the other hand, was always looking for a way out.

Expecting…hoping for anything more would only break her heart. And worse, she couldn’t hurt Brian. He was too good a man to suffer heartbreak.

She gasped when a hand closed around her calf, and she was pulled backwards until her body was tight against Brian’s. He rarely put his strength on display, but he was doing it now. His hold on her made it clear that she wasn’t getting away.

He was breathing heavily, but then so was she. “I want you to answer me this question,” he said. “What would you have done back then if I’d told you that I’d fallen in love with you?”

How was she supposed to answer that? “I don’t know,” she said, planting her hands on his shoulders and trying for a little distance between them. “You can’t ask me that now. How can I possibly answer?” They couldn’t go back in time and make different choices. He’d said it himself. No one could change the past.

He gave her a long look, his eyes searching hers. “All right. Fair enough. We’ll leave the past alone. What would you say now if I said I was starting to care for you again?”

Her heart flipped in her chest. She was thrilled. No, she was terrified. Oh, god. She didn’t know what she was feeling. It was so much more than she’d ever expected. All she knew for sure was that touching him felt right, being with him felt right.

Her fingers curled into his shoulders, bringing him closer when she’d intended to push him away. She could think of no words to say, so she kissed him, softly, questioningly at first, but passion soon swept them along. Their bare skin rubbed together, igniting her desire as he deepened the kiss. The water lapped against them, but nothing could come between their bodies and the feelings that drove them on.

“Why do we always end up in places where we can’t make love?” he gasped when the kiss ended.

“Is this worse than my car?” Her fingers were in his hair, flicking away the droplets of water.

“Different,” he said, as they bobbed in the water. “Come make love with me, darlin’.”

They swam to shore together. As soon as her feet hit the sandy bottom of the lake, Brian lifted her in his arms and stalked toward the picnic blanket. He dropped to his knees, putting her down gently in the center. Without pausing, he removed her bikini and his swim trunks.

“Good thing we’ve got the place to ourselves,” she whispered when he lowered himself on top of her.

“We’d be trying out the backseat of my truck otherwise.” He kissed her then, robbing her of speech for several minutes. “The ground’s too hard for you,” he muttered and rolled them until she was on top.

“Um…I like this.” She pushed up a few inches and studied his face in the sunlight. She felt an almost overwhelming urge to tell him that she was falling in love with him again, but she kept the words inside her. It wasn’t fair to say it when she had no intention of staying. It would only hurt them both. There wasn’t a future for the two of them.

But they could have now. Her fingers played with the hair on his chest. She could show him love, and not say the actual words. Maybe he was thinking the same thing as his hands coasted down her back and squeezed her butt.

Giving in to the passion. She could do that much for him.

“I think I could stay like this with you forever, darlin’,” he said.

“Forever?” she smiled at him. “I think you’d be looking for some release pretty quick.”

“I’m a patient man.”

“We’ll see about that.” She dipped her head and ran her tongue over his nipple, and felt pleased when he sucked in a breath. “Have I told you how handsome and sexy you are? How much I love to touch you?”

“Touch away,” he whispered, so she moved slowly down his torso, kissing him, until she reached his erection and ran her tongue over the tip. “Ah, darlin’.” With his words as encouragement, she took him in her mouth and plunged down on him. “God damn, that’s good.”

“Glad you think so,” she said before taking him again. She was enjoying pleasing him with the warm sun on her back and the lap of the waves nearby. After a few minutes, she felt his hand in her hair.

“Come here,” he said, his voice hoarse with need. “I want you.”

She made her way back up his body. She meant to take her time, but he lifted her and held her so he could suckle her breasts. The desire that shot through her made her whimper his name. “I want you, too.”

He reached for his wallet, pulled a condom out, and quickly sheathed himself in it. She straddled him, so ready to have him inside her, but he had other ideas. Before she could come down on him, his fingers went between her thighs, teasing and stroking, until she nearly came just from his touch. She caught his wrist and met his eyes.

“I want us to come together. I want to feel that with you,” she whispered, aware that her face probably revealed all the feelings in her heart. With her hands on the hard muscles of his chest, she lowered slowly onto him, letting him fill her. As they always had, they easily found a rhythm to increase the pleasure of their joining, riding it until the moment when she couldn’t hold on any longer. Her orgasm rolled through her when he thrust up into her, breathing her name as he came.

She collapsed onto his chest with her head tucked into the crook of his shoulder as their breathing calmed and bodies cooled. Sex had always been good with Brian, but simple sex was not what they’d just shared. This was making love, pleasing each other as a sign of that emotion, and not just a physical release.

She pushed herself off his chest and rolled onto her side, next to him. One thing was clear to her. She owed him the words in her heart.

“Your fair skin’ll burn in this sun,” he said before she could speak. “Better put my shirt on.” He rolled away from her to grab it, giving her a full view of his butt.

“Wait,” she said, putting her hand on his side to hold him still. “What’s this?” She ran a finger over a tattoo of a yellow flower on his right butt cheek. Good boy Brian had a tatt? And then it hit her. It wasn’t just any tattoo. She caught her breath. It was an exact copy of the flower drawing she’d left for him—the one that had been a substitute in place of saying she loved him. He’d had it permanently marked onto his skin. “I can’t believe…” She didn’t know where she was going with that sentence, but she felt overwhelmed.

“Put the shirt on, darlin’.” He helped her pull the shirt over her head and fit her arms through the sleeves. It was too big on her, but that didn’t matter.

She studied his face before taking a deep breath. Her next words were going to be tough ones, but ones she had to say. “Brian, I think I’m falling for you all over again.”

His smile was instant and sexy. “God, I hope so.” He kissed her then and she felt warmth spread throughout her. He’d made it easy for her. That was so like him, which was one of the many reasons it was easy to love him.

“Tell me about getting this tattoo,” she said when they were again stretched out in the sun, side-by-side, her hand in his. “I want the details.”

“Kind of embarrassing.” He wasn’t getting away with that.

“Those are the best stories.” She rolled over and propped her chin on his shoulder. “Were you drunk?”

“I was at a bachelor party over in Carson. And, yeah, we’d had too much whiskey and were short on sense,” he admitted.

“You regret getting it?” The thought that he might bothered her.

“Not for one minute, darlin’. But it was tough to sit down the next day.”

She laughed, but felt she had to ask the next question. “Why the flower?”

“Because it was from you.” He tilted his head and his eyes met hers. “I’d carried the picture in my wallet since you left it for me that morning.”

His words stunned her. She had no idea her little picture had been so important to him, especially since he couldn’t have known then what it meant to her—what she’d almost left behind for him instead. “Do you still have it?”

“The picture? No, I ended up in flood waters up to my waist two years ago and it disintegrated.” His tone was regretful.

“Good thing it’s permanently on your butt. I wonder what that says about me. Am I a pain in your ass?” she teased. “I think I have been at times.”

“Never,” he said, so quickly and vehemently that it set her heart racing. He turned toward her, bringing them face-to-face.

“Good to know,” she whispered. “But I’m still curious. Who knows about the tattoo? Just the guys at the party?”

He shook his head. “They were so far gone I doubt anyone remembers it. And, thank god, Jake wasn’t there that night or I’d never have heard the end of it.”

“Because it’s not macho to get a tattoo of a pretty yellow flower?” she asked softly.

“Because he knew I had it in my wallet and knew it was from you.”

“Ah,” she said, understanding. Brian’s twin didn’t want him to be hurt by love. More proof that his family was a thousand times kinder and more caring than hers. “I’ll keep your secret, but I want to show you something.” She got to her feet, pulled on her shorts, and put his Stetson on her head. “Come on, sheriff. Let’s go for a drive.”