It Started with a Bang by Piper James

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Ryder

I’d spent days trying to think of ways to make things right with Belle. I missed her more than I thought possible, and I was going a little crazy torturing myself over the way things turned out.

I let her believe I was the selfish ass she accused me of being. I left without fighting for her. For us. And I never told her how I really felt. I never told her I’d fallen in love with her.

But every idea I came up with fell flat. Part of me wanted to go over and confront her. To make her listen. But I knew seeing me so soon would cause her pain, and I’d already hurt her enough.

At least, that’s what I told myself when my conscience kicked in, telling me I owed her an explanation. I knew it was a cop out. An excuse to stay away when the real reason I didn’t go to her was because I was scared.

Scared she wouldn’t feel the same way I did. That she’d tell me she didn’t want me and kick me out after my confession of love. That she’d order me from her life forever, and it really would be over.

I hoped that if I gave her some time, she’d eventually realize that while I had lied about a few things, I hadn’t set out to intentionally screw her over. And once she figured that out, she’d come to me and give me a chance to explain myself. We’d straighten all this out and decide where to go from here.

When that didn’t happen, I tried to nudge her into action by returning the money she paid me up front. I never wanted nor needed it, and there was no reason to leave it sitting, untouched, in my bank account. By returning it, I thought I was showing Belle I didn’t care about her money…that it was her I wanted.

But my plan exploded in my face. A few days after the transfer went through, the motel manager showed up at my door with a package addressed to me. Inside, I’d found paperwork terminating my marriage.

Belle had served me divorce papers.

My body filled with hurt as I read through the pages. The verbiage was cut and dry, lacking any emotion whatsoever. Citing irreconcilable differences as the reason, the document laid out in very clear terms that we’d each leave the marriage with what we brought into it. No questions about property division or assets. No mess.

Like the marriage never even happened.

Anger very quickly pushed out the hurt. Finding a pen in the night stand drawer with the motel’s name printed on it, I scribbled my signature across every line marked with a brightly colored sticky note. I mumbled to myself as I signed, and if anyone had been there to witness it, they probably would’ve thought I was insane.

“If this is what she wants, then fine,” I spat between clenched teeth. “We’ll end this fucking thing and get on with our lives.”

Once I double-checked I didn’t miss any signatures, I stomped outside and went straight to Chase’s door. My first instinct was to pound my fist against it, but I managed to restrain the urge and knocked sensibly. I didn’t want to scare Daniel.

“I need the truck keys,” I said by way of a greeting when Chase swung the door open.

“Hey, you okay?” he asked, pulling the set of keys from his pocket and handing them over.

“I’m fine,” I said, striding away before he could stop me.

I didn’t want anyone talking sense into me right now. I was pissed, and I needed to lash out at the person responsible for my anger…my soon-to-be ex-wife.

I’ve done nothing but try to please her for weeks, so why stop now? If divorcing me will make her happy, then so-fucking-be-it.

My jaw clenched harder as the thoughts ran through my mind. Slamming the truck into gear, I stomped on the gas pedal, making the tires spin and squeal before I peeled out of the lot. I saw Noah and Ethan in my rearview, rushing out to stand beside Chase as they all watched me speed away.

At least they couldn’t follow me or try to stop me or anything, since I was in the only vehicle we had in Texas. Thank God for small favors.

By the time I got out to Belle’s house, my anger had boiled down to a strong simmer. I turned into the drive at a normal speed. The front door opened as I rolled to a stop, and Thanos bounded down the steps, charging me as I hopped down from the truck.

I squatted down, throwing my arms around him as he pushed into my chest and licked my face. I told him he was a good boy, and I’d missed him, too, laughing as the sound of my voice made his movements even wilder. Belle’s voice rang out, calling his name, and he gave me one last lick before trotting back toward her.

“What are you doing here, Ryder?” she asked, and the sound of my name on her lips sent a shiver down my spine.

“I brought you these,” I said, waving the pages in the air.

Her eyes widened a bit, then narrowed as she watched me move closer. I stopped at the bottom of the porch steps, leaving at least six feet of space between us. She made no move to reach out for the paperwork, keeping her arms crossed firmly over her chest.

“You didn’t have to rush them out here, yourself,” she said, her face carefully blank. “You could’ve just had a messenger bring them by on Monday.”

“I didn’t think you’d want to deal with this at work,” I said.

She sucked in a sharp breath, her chest shuddering on the exhale. Pain flashed across her features, and I silently cursed myself for bringing that up.

She probably still thought I was taking her job. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if Jaxson had kept my refusal to himself. He wouldn’t want to look like a fool, and in his eyes, having someone like me refuse an offer from the great Jaxson Parker would be humiliating for him.

I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but her next words froze me in my tracks.

“I don’t work there anymore.”

“What?” I asked my head rearing back. “Did he fire you?”

A bitter laugh burst through her lips. “You mean he didn’t tell his new CEO about my resignation? I told him to go fuck himself right after he told me he was giving you my job.”

“But…what about your dream to use the company for good?” I asked, the words popping out before I thought them through properly.

“You stole those dreams from me,” she said, her voice cracking with emotion.

“Belle,” I said, “I’m so—”

“Don’t,” she interrupted, throwing up her hand as if that would stop me. “Do not apologize to me.”

I felt like I was standing on a precipice, and whatever decision I made right now was going to affect the rest of my life. I could give her the papers and walk away, saving her anymore pain and heartache. Or I could fight. Make her listen to me and hope that what I’d say would actually make a difference.

“Just give me the papers, Ryder,” she said, holding out a hand for them.

There was a deadness to her voice that sparked a fire in me. My fist curled tighter around the divorce papers as I shoved them behind my back.

“I have some things to say,” I said, “and you’re going to listen.”

“I don’t have time for this,” she said tiredly.

I bolted up the steps as she turned toward the door. My fingers wrapped around her wrist, stopping her. Her gasp echoed in my ears, sending a shiver down my spine as she tugged her hand away.

“Please, Belle. Hear me out. Let me say what I have to say, then I’ll give you these papers and leave, if that’s what you want.”

“Fine. Come inside,” she said, pushing open the door to let Thanos trot in ahead of us.

Belle moved into the living room, moving to the opposite side and standing with her hands propped on her hips. Taking the hint, I kept my distance, stopping several yards in front of her and shoving the rolled-up papers into my back pocket.

This was my chance to explain, and I needed to choose my words carefully. I couldn’t afford to fuck this up. Not again.

“I didn’t accept your father’s job offer,” I said, and her mouth rounded into a small o. “I never had any intentions of taking it, Belle.”

“I heard you on the phone. You said yes,” she said, looking thoroughly confused.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I know what you heard. And you’re right, I did say yes, but only because he was demanding an answer, and I didn’t know what else to do.”

“You say no,” she said, her face incredulous. “He offers you my future, and you say no. It’s not hard.”

“It’s not that simple,” I said, shaking my head. “He told me he never intended for you to have the position. That if I turned him down, he’d sell the company before letting you take over.”

She inhaled sharply, the stricken look on her face gutting me. I clenched my hands into tight fists and pushed on, determined to get this all out before she shut down again.

“That’s why I didn’t tell you that night. How could I, Belle? How could I tell my wife that her father had deceived her so brutally? That she’d never get the one thing she truly wanted? I realized the next morning I had no choice but to tell you everything, but Jaxson got to you before I could. When he called me, I told him I’d take the position to buy us some time. I swear, Belle. That is the only reason I said yes. I don’t want Parker Industries.”

There were tears in her eyes as she stared at me, her chest curling inward as she visibly swallowed. Clearing her throat, she asked me the most important question I’d ever been asked in my life.

“What do you want, Ryder?”