Maxed Steel by M.J. Fields
Probably Gonna Need a Sign
Max
Whistlingthe tune of “Love You Like The Movies” as she walks out of the bathroom gained me a glare. Singing softly behind her has her shaking her head as she walks toward the car, so I sing louder and grab her hand, keeping it in mine as she tries to jerk it away.
“I’ll never let go, Miller. I’ll never let go.”
“Yeah, well, you just may have sealed both our fates.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” I sing.
“Okay, just stop,” she hisses.
“Like Townley loves homework. Like Seashore loves drama. Like Jase loves Carly.”
“Would you shut up?” she says loudly.
“Like Max loves Saylor’s momma.”
She about trips over air as she scolds me. “Oh my God, there are people, Max.”
I keep singing, and she keeps acting all annoyed and shit, but her ass—that ass I am gonna make a meal out of—starts swaying a little bit as she hurries to get to the car, while I remind her, in song of course, “In case you forget what we just did, I’ll write it all down—”
“For real, Max, just …” She starts laughing. “Stop!”
At the car, I cut her off and sing at the top of my lungs, “I’ll grab your hand, ask you to dance—”
She spins around to give me hell, I suppose, but I turn her like a top, making it a dance.
“—in the middle of the street.” I pull her against me, and she buries her face in my shirt as I continue, “Learn to sign, cheesy lines, like baby you complete me.”
“You’re doing great, man!” someone yells, and a horn honks, then a bunch of other vehicles are doing the same.
“You are such a jackass.” She laughs as she peeks up at me.
“If you ever forget, where we’ve been and what we did, I’ll write it all down, sing it out load again and again. I promise, if you let me, I’ll love you like a movie.” I stop singing and tip my head down. “I love you, Mila. Didn’t plan on what happened up there, just needed those lips and a taste.”
She says nothing, but she looks a little scared.
“Nothing and no one will ever hurt you, Blue, I promise.”
She fists my shirt and pulls me closer, and yeah, I kiss her.
Against her lips, I ask a burning question, “Which one of them got to you?”
She looks at me curiously.
Lips still on hers, I reach behind her and open the passenger door, kissing her quickly before stepping away. “My mom and dad are the only two people I told about Saylor, Blue. Kiki was eavesdropping too, but I made them promise to stay out of it so you and I can tackle the issue together. So, tell me which one told you I knew about Marriott Marc?”
She slides into the car and huffs, “Way to ruin a moment.”
“Legit question.” I lean in and buckle her up, kissing her cheek on the way out.
“Neither,” she answers, and then I step back and close the door.
Sliding into the driver’s seat, I buckle up and take her hand. “See, how this works is, it’s me and you against the world.”
“So, you’re a relationship expert now?” she asks.
“Got my Doctorate. Fucking pro status. Level 10. Just follow my lead, and we’ll be celebrating seventy-five years while still getting it on daily.”
“What if I don’t want to get it on daily?”
My jaw legit drops, and she turns away so I don’t see her trying not to laugh.
Turning on the car, I ask, “You Maxed Out already after round one?”
“We’re going to have to work on your confidence, because it’s clearly lacking.”
“Raised with it, Blue. Been beat up a couple times, bruised pretty badly, but didn’t break.”
She gives my hand a squeeze, rests her head back against the headrest and, in a condescending as fuck tone, says, “Please make us mere mortals feel better about ourselves and tell us what happened that bruised a god.”
“Appreciate the whole god thing, but I’m not one. I prefer legend,” I correct her.
“If only in your own mind.”
“Not gonna lie, Blue, I love it when you give it back as good as you get, but I’d prefer it be when I like”—I scratch my head, as if in thought—“fuck you doggy. You know, slam that ass up against me, meeting me thrust for—”
She smacks me. “Shut up.”
I take her hand, kiss it, and then hold it against my heart. “You want vulnerable, I guess I can give it to you. But then you gotta give me something, too.”
I shift the car in drive and get us back on the road. “Growing up close to my crew, being the youngest, I compared myself to them and our fathers. Took forever to get big like them. It sucked.”
“Well, I think you’re at least average now with the jewelry.” She laughs at her own burn.
I kiss her hand. “You got jokes when I’m being all vulnerable and shit.”
“So, you weren’t big. I’m sorry that I can’t relate, because I was.”
“Same feeling, Blue, that comparison of self to others. Doing that to yourself is like repeatedly stabbing your self-esteem, and instead of building yourself up and becoming who you’re supposed to be, it just bloodies the reflection pool so it’s just a ghost of you staring back. I know you got pissed I ditched Stanford, but I needed to get the hell away from everything for a bit.”
“I’m sorry. My joke was distasteful.”
“Well, Blue, be thankful your pussy isn’t. Fucking delicious.”
“See? I was trying to be serious, and you make a joke. You’re giving me whiplash, Max—”
“See? I wasn’t joking. Your pussy is—”
“Favorite color?” she interrupts me.
“Blue. Yours?”
“Yellow.”
“Cool. Hobbies?” I ask.
“Not a lot of time for them.”
“Understood. Then, what do you like to do?”
“Honestly, I like working at the gym. Makes me want to work out, and once I do, I always wonder why I dread it.”
I squeeze her hand. “Gives you a high, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“And the bartending thing?”
“Hate it. But need to make money, and so does Lindsey. Mine out of necessity; hers out of not wanting to feel like her parents completely control her life.”
“Understand that. Pretty lucky my folks never used money as a punitive punishment. Gimme more.”
“I used to love reading.”
“And writing.” I laugh.
“Yeah, but now that they’re requirements for school, it’s not that much of an escape.”
“Calling bullshit on that. It’s not school; it’s that you don’t have a writing partner or the muse like you did in high school. But now …” I wink.
“The time.”
“Two years and done, yeah?” I kiss her hand again.
“Yeah, two years.” She smiles, but it’s of the sad variety.
“What are you majoring in?”
“Social work.”
“Makes total sense.”
“You?”
“Marketing.”
“Oh?” She acts surprised.
“I know we aren’t pals on social media”—I raise an eyebrow at her, and she rolls her eyes—“but I got a pretty good thing going there.”
“Oh, I remember all the videos and pictures. If I hadn’t known you from school, I’d have wondered if you owned a shirt.”
Joking, I say, “Total bean flicker material for you, then, huh?”
She looks out the window. “You could say that.”
“Please, for the love of hot sex, give me a rough number of how many times you got yourself off to my posts.”
She laughs. “Oh, shut up.”
Dead serious, I tell her, “Give me a number, Blue, and I’ll multiply it by ten by our one year.”
“Not happening,” she says, her face turning red, and I bet her nips are hard … yep, they sure are.
“I’m spending an hour sucking on those titties when my class is over.”
She looks shook when she asks, “How exactly is one supposed to respond to that?”
Holding her hand tight against my chest, I answer, “Pretty much got the script down earlier. I believe it was Yes, God, yes. Yes, yes, yes, but feel free to improvise when it’s actually going down.”
“You seriously took this conversation in a different direction than it started. Can you please focus?”
“I do my best work when I go with my gut, Blue.” Thinking now is a good time to spring the whole car thing on her, I do. “Like when I bought this sweet ride as a gift for my girl so she can be safe and in a smoke-free environment.”
“Oh, hell no.” She jacks her hand back.
“Now, is that how you accept a gift, Blue?”
“This isn’t a gift, Max. This is a three row SUV. A grocery getter. And it costs more than I’ll make in a year when I graduate. If that isn’t bad enough, I can’t even imagine it wouldn’t get stolen in my neighborhood.”
“Got it for a Steel. Mom was upgrading, and this was listed as the safest family vehicle.”
“Then I hope you enjoy driving it.”
“I used a coupon,” I state.
“Oh, yeah?” she huffs. “They give coupons for this kind of vehicle in your zip code, because we sure don’t in Bayside.”
“I mean, yeah, crossed out the free for one hug and penciled in thirty-five cents off.”
“Are you trying to be funny? Because this is not.”
“May not be funny, but you and I both know Becky isn’t safe. And I can’t imagine you needing space from me, because I want to be up your ass, figuratively, for now, and then literally of course, and—”
“Max, just stop.”
“Fuck no. I’m just getting started letting you know how I’ve been feeling since seeing you again and realizing that stupid fuck who tried to dose Ellis and got us both. Could have ended my life, Amias’s life, gotten just Ellis and raped her, fucking her head up more than it was previously due to—” I stop and shake my head. “You drive this, you won’t break down. You get in an accident, you’re safer in here than most of the cars on the road. Your truck’s fucked. It would cost six Gs to get everything fixed, and no guarantee it wouldn’t need another engine in the next couple years since the warranty on used engines is six months. You have three years on this. Makes sense. So, chill, Blue. You need to go for a drive, hang with the girls, take a weekend and chill in a cabin with Red. This makes sense.”
I let go of her hand, because she’s not even trying to hold mine, and grip the steering wheel. “What happens if you and Saylor break down at the local discount store in Bayside, the one between the paycheck loan place and the pawn shop that some addict stumbles out of, is fucked up, and decides to start shit? You get in Becky, who decides it’s time for a smoke break, and then … fuck.” I hit the steering wheel. “I lost two years with you and two years of firsts with Saylor. Consider this child support. Take the scrap money that Oakley’s old man, who owns the shop I had Becky towed to, is giving you and stop working those parties. Cops could bust them at any time, and you’d possibly end up with a charge. Guessing that may fuck up future job applications.”
“We’ve planned to stop before we turn twenty-one. We’re not purchasing the alcohol, so don’t you dare look down on me for doing what I have to do to take care of my daughter.”
“Look down on you?” I huff. “I fucking admire you. But I’m here now, so let me take care of you and her, because I can and because I want to.”
“You don’t even know if she’s—”
“Are you mine, Miller?”
She doesn’t answer.
I mumble under my breath, “This over a vehicle. You better strap in; this ride isn’t gonna be any smoother if you keep fighting me. Be like riding a fucking mechanical bull during an electrical surge.”
“Fine! I get you wanting to do all this, but I don’t want your parents’ money only to possibly disappoint them and—”
“I don’t use a dime of my parents’ money. I have a steady stream of income from my social media channels. Haven’t touched my trust fund. Been saving it up in a vault to unlock when either someone in my family needs it or I find my queen, which is you just to be clear. Guessing we’re gonna have a fight about that, too.”
“My heart hurts for you. Truly, Max, but slow down. I didn’t think I’d ever have to consider a custody …” She stops when the phone rings and the dashboard displays Oakley’s name.
I hit accept call.
“What’s the good news, Oakley?”
“None. Thing’s toast, just like I said. She’s gonna be pissed.”
“Yeah, I’m sure she will be, but that’s not your fault.” I look over at her as she pulls her knees up to her chest and hugs them.
“Boone needs you back here to babysit. Dumbass broke in here with a ball bat and took out the windows and the windshield, thinking she’d get more from insurance than for scraps. Talked my old man down from calling the cops on him after he checked out the surveillance tape. He brought a friend, too.”
“I wanna laugh, but I’m not thinking you’re finding it amusing right now, huh?”
“Not real funny, but that crazy bastard certainly is loyal to those he deems a friend. But dragging another into it was a bad move.”
“Any damages, let me know. I’ll cover his ass and his pal’s.”
“That’s good, Steel, but I got it.”
“All right.”
“You want me to tell Mila, or you need an excuse to talk to her?” he asks.
“I’m right here, Oakley,” Mila says on a sigh.
“Sorry, Mila, we tried.”
“I appreciate it”—she looks at me and finishes the sentence—“even though I may not seem like I do.”
“Hard to accept help when you’re not used to getting it, huh?”
“Isn’t like giving to a charity when your head’s up your ass about someone and just want them safe,” I snip.
“Yeah, well, um …” Oakley pauses. “So, you want her to go for scrap?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“I’ll give you cash when I see you.”
She sniffs. “Thanks, Oakley.”
“You up for catching some waves tomorrow night?” I ask him.
“You serious?” he replies.
“Dead serious. Bring a couple friends.”
“Will do,” he says then hangs up.
After a few seconds, she whispers, “Thank you.”
“Yeah. Anytime.”
Another twenty miles down the road, and she turns to me. “You surprised that you’re the one who needs the break already?”
“The ocean was my everything—my passion, my love, and it keeps me grounded. You need a break, and I’m man enough to give you the space you need. No big deal, Blue.”
A couple minutes later, she’s asleep.
I turn on the radio and just drive.