Special Delivery by April Wilson

Chapter 18 – Molly

Molly Ferguson

Watching Jamie take care of Luke is bittersweet. Jamie loves kids, and I know he wants one of his own. I do, too, or at least I used to think I did when I was younger. But so much has happened since the idealistic days of my youth. I had a breast cancer diagnosis, surgery to remove both breasts, followed by my marriage slowly falling apart to the point that it turned abusive. I’m thirty-five now, no longer a spring chicken. And there’s my cancer to think about. Even though I’ve had a double mastectomy, there’s always a small chance it could come back. They can’t remove all of the breast tissue—at least a tiny bit is left.

I don’t spend my life dwelling on my bout with cancer or worrying about what the future might bring, but the facts are always there, deep in the recesses of my mind.

Would it be fair for me to marry Jamie?

What if my cancer comes back?

Jamie is the most selfless, most compassionate and loving person I’ve ever had the fortune to know. He has so many good qualities, and so much love to give. And he’d make a fantastic father. Even blind, he’s capable of anything he sets his mind to.

Luke has finished eating his waffles and drinking his milk from a sippy cup. Jamie’s doing a great job keeping him occupied while Shane and Beth are upstairs resting after their ordeal. Luke’s been asking for his parents on and off all morning, but so far, we’ve managed to distract him. There haven’t been any toddler tantrums yet.

We hear a bit of a commotion in the hallway, and then Jake and Aiden come bounding into the dining room, both dressed in swim trunks and practically vibrating with excitement.

Aiden is carrying a blow-up dinosaur swim toy. “We’re going swimming!” he says, a huge grin on his adorable face. His brown eyes are big and bright, and he’s clearly excited.

“I’m taking the little guy swimming while his sisters nap,” Jake says. “You guys want to join us?”

Luke’s eyes get big, too, when he sees Aiden’s bright green dinosaur floaty. He starts jabbering and slapping his hands on his high chair tray.

“I think somebody wants to go swimming,” I say to Jamie.

Luke climbs to his feet and throws himself toward Jamie, who catches him easily and pulls him onto his lap. “You wanna go swimming, buddy?”

Squealing, Luke bounces up and down on Jamie’s thighs.

“I think that’s a yes,” I say, laughing.

“That’s definitely a yes,” Jake says.

“All right, buddy, hold on,” Jamie says. Then to me, he asks, “Do you know if Beth brought any swim diapers?”

“I believe there are some in his diaper bag,” I say. Since we’re on babysitting duty, we have his diaper bag in our room.

“We’ll be right down,” Jamie says to his brother. “As soon as we get this guy cleaned up and changed.”

Aiden literally jumps for joy, bouncing excitedly on his feet. “Luke, we’re going swimming!”

Luke hauls himself up onto his feet and throws his arms around Jamie’s neck.

“Okay, we’re going, we’re going,” Jamie says and laughs.

When Jamie hugs Luke back, my heart melts. This man needs to be a father.

* * *

After washing off Luke’s sticky fingers, we take him upstairs to our room to change him into a swim diaper.

“I’ll do it,” Jamie says as he lays Luke on our bed. “Can you hand me the diaper?”

I watch with great amusement as Luke squirms and rolls with excitement, reaches for his stuffed kitty toy, and tries to get up before Jamie’s done. He’s just being a typical toddler, and Jamie takes it all in stride with the patience of a saint.

“Hold still, little man,” Jamie says with a laugh. He’s using Cooper’s nickname for Luke. “I only have two hands, you know.”

It’s fascinating to watch Jamie with the little ones. It’s like he has a sixth sense about what they’re going to do next. I’ve noticed he keeps one hand on them at all times—I think that’s how he can anticipate their every action before they take it. I suspect he feels their muscles contracting before they actually make the move.

Luke squeals as he tries to roll away half naked, but Jamie stops his getaway attempt with one hand while he tugs the swim diaper in place.

Jamie’s the first one to volunteer to change a diaper, wipe sticky little fingers, or wash a dirty face. I suspect he’s trying to demonstrate his child caretaking abilities, but he doesn’t need to prove anything to me. I know he’s incredibly competent at everything he sets his mind to.

Once the swim diaper is in place, Jamie pulls Luke up to stand on his feet. “Ready to go swimming?”

Luke bounces on the bed, chattering like crazy, and then he launches himself into Jamie’s arms.

Jamie smiles. “Let’s get changed.”

I take over babysitting duty while Jamie goes into our closet and changes. When he’s done, I change into my navy blue one-piece swimsuit. When we’re all ready, we head downstairs to the poolroom, where we find Jake and Aiden already in the water, playing in the shallow end as Aiden floats in his dinosaur.

Jamie sets Luke on his feet, and the toddler pulls him toward the pool.

“You guys go ahead,” I say as I take a seat on one of the poolside loungers. “I think I’ll just watch for a while.”

I never tire of watching Jamie in the pool. As a former Navy SEAL, he’s completely at home in the water. Even blind, he navigates the pool with an uncanny ability.

After putting some pint-sized armband floaties on Luke, Jamie carries him into the pool.

Jake splashes Aiden, which makes the little boy squeal with delight. It’s wonderful how Jake has taken so readily to being a father. Not only is he the father of twin baby girls now, but he has also legally adopted Aiden, Annie’s son from her first marriage.

I’m pretty sure Jamie envies his two brothers who have recently become fathers. And his sister Sophie will join the parenting ranks soon.

Jamie’s sitting in the shallow water with Luke in his lap. Luke keeps lunging for Aiden’s floating dinosaur. To distract him, Jamie carries Luke deeper into the pool, where the water is waist-high on Jamie. Jake pulls Aiden along, and the four of them are near the middle of the pool.

Luke suddenly seems a bit leery of the water, and he clings to Jamie like a little monkey, his legs wrapped tightly around Jamie’s waist, his little hands clutching Jamie’s shoulders as if his life depends on it.

Jamie rubs Luke’s back and says something to him, obviously trying to comfort him. He bobs in the water, just enough to get Luke’s feet wet, and Luke chortles with glee as he begins to relax.

Jake says something to his brother, and Jamie nods. Then Jamie hands Luke over to his brother and pulls Aiden from his dinosaur floaty.

Holding Aiden, Jamie sinks down into the water so that only their heads are above water. Jamie says something to Aiden, who nods hesitantly. Then Jamie carefully rolls Aiden over onto his back and holds him as he teaches Aiden how to float on his back. At first, Aiden is tense, and he has a death grip on Jamie’s hands. Jamie slowly walks him around in the water, showing him how to position his body so that he stays afloat. Jake watches with an approving smile.

After a few minutes of practice, Jamie releases Aiden’s hands and coaches him to float on his own. After some misguided attempts, Aiden succeeds. Jamie steps back from the boy as Aiden floats on his own.

“Daddy, I’m doing it!” Aiden yells. “I’m floating.”

Jake hands Luke back to Jamie and he scoops Aiden up into his arms. “That was awesome, buddy. Good job.”

“I can swim now,” Aiden says.

Jake laughs. “Well, let’s not get too carried away.”

I can hear the guys talking about swimming lessons. While they’re deep in conversation, I wade into the water and take Luke from Jamie. Luke clings to me, his little legs around my waist and his tiny hands fisting the straps of my swimsuit. I walk around the pool, bobbing with him in my arms. Gradually, he relaxes enough to laugh when we bob up and down in the water.

Luke points toward the pool entrance and squeals with delight when he spots Shane walking in. “Dada! Dada!”

Shane comes to stand at the side of the pool, his hands on his hips.

I walk over to the edge with Luke and hand him up to Shane. “Looking for this little guy?”

Shane nods. “Beth wants him. I think she’s having withdrawal.” He grabs a dry towel from a cart and wraps it around his son before perching him on his hip. “Thanks, Molly. We appreciate you and Jamie watching him for us.”

“Anytime,” I tell him.

Jamie swims over toward us. “How’s Beth?”

Shane readjusts his hold on Luke, who’s tucking his head into Shane’s chest. “She’s doing about as well as can be expected. Her fever is down, but she’s in some discomfort.”

“Dada,” Luke says, reaching up to pat Shane’s bearded cheek.

Shane leans down and kisses the baby’s head. “Hi, buddy. I missed you.”

“And the baby?” I ask.

“Ava’s doing well. Right now, Beth needs rest more than anything, but I think she’s having trouble settling down without Luke.” Shane lifts Luke high up, bringing their faces level with each other. “Ready to go see Mama?”

Luke’s expression morphs into a big grin, and he kicks with excitement.

After Shane and Luke leave, Jamie asks me if I want to swim laps with him.

“Sure, but I’ll just slow you down,” I tell him. I’m a decent enough swimmer, but I don’t have the strength to keep up with his powerful strokes.

He wraps his arms around me and pulls me close for a kiss. “I’ll take it easy on you, I promise.”