A Real Cowboy Always Protects by Stephanie Rowe

Chapter Thirteen

Skylar feltlike her heart would shatter into a million pieces, listening to Logan and Chase talk. She'd lost so much, but nothing like what they had endured. She had baggage, but nothing like what haunted them.

She looked down at her hand, still entwined with Logan's. With each word he'd spoken, his grip on her hand had become tighter and tighter. His words had felt like a warning to get her to back off, but the way he held her hand was a desperate plea not to let him drown.

"I make enemies," Logan said, drawing her attention back to the present, to the issue they were facing. The issue of surviving.

I make enemies.

Those three words were so simple, but they sounded so terrible to Skylar. The way Logan said it made it seem like they defined him. I make enemies. What a terrible, lonely way to live. Instinctively, she squeezed his hand, but he didn't look at her.

He also didn't release her.

Chase frowned. "That's your life? I make enemies? And that's what you choose? That sounds good to you?"

Logan's grip tightened on her hand. "I make enemies of bad guys, because I'm one of the good guys. Do you know what an incredible feeling that is, Chase? To be a good guy?"

Chase sighed. "I do. Every time I look at J.J., or Mira, or Alexander, I know exactly what that feels like. There's no bigger miracle than for one of us to feel that way."

Logan nodded, and emotion squeezed Skylar's heart so tightly that she felt like she couldn’t breathe. These men. God, these men. She felt like she'd been given a gift of this moment, a raw, unfiltered view into their very souls.

A view that they probably never gave anyone, except each other, and Mira, of course. She was sure Mira was inside that circle, holding it open for Chase, so he could find his way out whenever it tried to trap him.

Logan looked at Skylar, then back at Chase. "Skylar lives across the hall from me. Last night, two of my enemies found me. They used her to try to get to me. I killed one. The other got away, but Skylar saw him, and he knows that. He knows where she lives." He didn't say the rest, but he didn't need to.

Chase rubbed his jaw, not with weariness, but with focus. Adrenaline. Purpose. Skylar could feel the energy in the room shift from the agony of their shadows to purpose and determination. "Your team is searching for him while you get off the grid with Skylar?"

Logan nodded, absently bending and unbending her fingers, as if he were too restless to sit still, and it was her hand that he needed to ground him.

"Could they track you here?" Chase asked.

"Highly unlikely." Logan leaned forward again, moving her fingers back and forth restlessly. "Even if it's an internal leak, they won't find leads back to here. That's why I chose to bring Skylar here. I don't believe they would find us, but it's always possible."

Chase rubbed his jaw. "What about your emergency contact info? Death benefits? If it's internal, they could find us that way."

"No." Logan shook his head. "I didn't put anyone down. According to my paperwork, I have no heirs. No emergency contact. Nothing."

Chase frowned. "So, if you died, no one would tell us? You literally pretended that we don't exist?"

Logan stiffened. "I had to. It was the only way to keep you safe." He met his brother's gaze. "It was the right choice. I did it for you."

Skylar could see the depth of pain in Chase's eyes. The bond between the brothers was so apparent, and yet Logan had literally chosen to pretend they didn't exist. When he'd said he was alone, she hadn't realized how far he'd taken it.

Chase flexed his jaw, but he didn't take it further. Instead, he simply said. "Well, I'm glad you came home for our help." His voice was even. Measured. Hiding all the emotion that was roiling in his eyes. "What do you need? You want to stay here?"

"No. The ranch is in the Stockton name. I don't want to take that chance. What about the River House? Don't the Harts own it?"

Chase nodded. "Brody and Keegan Hart are there full time right now, and those men know how to fight. Ryder's there with Zoey as well. Plenty of room, and plenty of back up."

"Perfect." Logan grinned. "Those guys are tough."

"They are," Chase agreed. "We all are."

There was no mistaking the absolute confidence of the two men, in themselves and each other. Even with their difference in skin tone, they looked so much alike. Same focus. Same intensity. Same smile. But Chase was softer, warmer, as if Mira and his kids had broken down the walls that Logan kept wrapped around him.

"What do we tell them?" Chase asked. "The family."

"I can't tell them I'm in the CIA," Logan said. "But I want them to be ready for a threat."

Again, regret flickered in Chase's eyes, but he didn't argue. Instead, he glanced at Skylar. "How about a jealous ex-husband?"

Logan laughed. "How fast will it take for them to get online and look him up? They'll realize she hasn't been married before in about two seconds."

Skylar cleared her throat. "I've been married."

Logan looked at her in surprise. "Really? I thought you were just engaged."

"Nope. We were married." She tried to ignore the curiosity on Logan's face. "It's no big deal. It's fine." The same lie she'd been telling the world ever since it happened.

"Was he ex-military?" Chase asked hopefully.

Skylar laughed. "No, not even close. No one would believe he's not a great guy." No one, indeed. No one would believe any other side of the story.

Logan cocked his head, studying her more carefully, so she finally pulled her hand free of his and turned to face Chase. "What if I witnessed something? I can't talk about it, but it put me in danger."

Chase nodded, and looked at Logan. "I think that makes sense. Then there's less to tell, less to screw up."

"Works for me." Logan leaned back against the couch, his arms draped along the back.

His body language casual, but she could feel the weight of his gaze. Dammit. She didn't want to talk about her life. She didn't want his focus on her. Her problems were nothing compared to his. She felt stupid even having them.

"We need to tell them that the man is highly trained," Logan said. "They need to be ready."

Chase nodded. "Former military black ops?"

"That works."

She was being hunted by someone with former military black ops skills? Well, that was fun. Surreal.

This was real life stakes. Suddenly, the weight of everything seemed to crush down on her too much. Logan's pain of his past, of severing himself from the family he so clearly loved, her own issues, a freaking assassin hunting her.

"I need a minute." She stood up, walked to the window, braced her palms on the sill, and looked out across the plain, trying to pull herself together.

She'd fought hard to become resilient. To look at life with humor. To laugh even when things became tough. Her dad had taught her that. But right now, in this moment, she couldn't find the woman she'd fought so hard to become.

She took a deep breath, studying the vista before her, trying to find even a single good thing to focus on. Her gaze fell upon the pink wildflowers at the edge of the huge lawn. Bright pink, glimmering in the midst of the brown grasses of the fields behind them. Light. Laughter. What did they smell like?

She took a deep breath, feeling things begin to settle inside her. The landscape was so gorgeous. So free. So unfettered. "It's beautiful here."

Logan walked up behind her, pausing just behind her. Not touching her, but so close. "It is. I forget what it's like until I come back. It's always a surprise to me how it feels to be here."

"Wait until you see the rest of the place," Chase said as he walked up to stand beside them. "It's fantastic."

"I bet." Normal conversation about scenery. His home. It felt good. Grounding.

Logan looked over at Chase. "When will people be here? I want to talk to Ryder, Brody, and Keegan before we invade their place."

"No one's supposed to arrive before eleven, but I'm sure Mira has already made some calls." Chase grinned. "Everyone's going to want to meet your fiancée. I'm guessing we have about five minutes until people show up."

Fiancée? Skylar had totally forgotten about the whole "pretend to be engaged" thing. "How many people are coming?" The words were just leaving her lips when she heard a car horn out front, doors slam, and the sound of children shouting. Crap. She was not in the headspace to do this right now.

"A lot." Logan rested his hand on the back of her neck. "Don't look so worried. We'll pull it off."

She nodded. "Right. Sure. Okay." She looked at Chase. "Can I use your bathroom?"

"You bet." He pointed. "Down the hall. Third door on the left."

"Great." She ducked out from under Logan's arm, and hurried down the hall. Her chest was tight, and she felt overwhelmed. As she passed by the picture window, she glanced out. There were three trucks already parked outside, two more pulling up, and there were people piling out of them. All these people were his family?

She saw three men get out, men who had the same facial structure as Logan and Chase. Men who shared their terrible past, who had clearly fought for love and happiness that life had taught them they didn't deserve.

She watched as the brother closest to her put his arm around a woman with blond hair, both of them laughing as their kids shrieked and ran to see their cousins. Yearning rushed through Skylar, surprising her. She pressed her palm to the window, watching their smiles as they greeted each other.

Family.

How could she lie to these people? Good people who believed in family and each other. People who had suffered. "You know what? I don't think this is a good idea. Let's just tell people we're friends…"

"Skylar." Logan's hands settled on her shoulders as one of the children saw her through the window and pointed.

Everyone immediately turned to look at her.

Dear God. How could they possibly pull off a fake engagement? "I can't do this, Logan."

He wrapped his arms around her waist, rested his chin on her shoulder, and waved at the little boy. "Yes, you can."

Dammit. His body felt far too warm and reassuring. Strong. Protective. Like a safe haven. She wanted to turn around, wrap her arms around his waist, and bury her face in his chest. "They're your family. They'll see right through me—"

"We're not like any family you've ever met. Trust me when I say it'll be okay."

"I know you're not like any family I've ever met. That's the problem."

He stiffened. "I know you don't want to be tangled up with us. With me. It's ugly here. Ugly inside me. Ugly inside my brothers." His voice was cool. Distant. Pulling back. Thinking he was too much for her.

"No." She spun around in his arms and glared at him. "Don't do that. Don't be an ass, Logan."

His eyes narrowed. "Don't do what?"

"Don't put that on me. Just because you see yourself as a damaged monster doesn’t mean I do. Don't put that on me. I see exactly who you are, and your brothers. I'm not afraid of it. I just feel bad lying to people who have been through so much, people who are going to be crushed when they find out you haven't actually found your Mira."

He stared at her, clearly stunned. "But—"

"I know it's for my safety. I know that. But unlike you, I'm not used to turning off my emotions, so it's going to be a little difficult for me." She heard footsteps on the front porch. "I need a moment. Go away." She took off before he could stop her, and didn't stop until she made it into the bathroom and shut the door.

Then she leaned back against it, let her head fall back, and let out a long breath. She couldn't do this.

And it wasn't simply because she didn't want to lie to them.

It was also because this family, this huge, loyal family was exactly what she wanted. If they welcomed her the way Mira had, she was going to fall in love with all of them, with this life, with their world.

And then she was going to have to leave it. Them. Chase. And, most importantly, Logan.

She hadn't been lying to Logan when she'd told him her heart couldn't take being shattered again. But what other choice did she have?

She literally had nowhere to go. The moment she'd locked eyes with Eugene, he'd taken all her options away from her.

She wanted to live. Even broken, vulnerable, and fragile, she wanted to live.

Which meant she had to stay here. They had to stay. They had to do whatever it took.

With a groan, Skylar pushed away from the door, walked over to the sink, and rested her palms on the counter. She stared at herself in the mirror.

She was still wearing her sweatshirt and leggings from when she'd run into Frances and Howard on her way to getting coffee. Her hair had lost its fluff. She had no makeup on. She had bags under her eyes from a night without sleep. She looked strung out, scared, and stressed.

A bag of dirty laundry would be a vast improvement. Frances would be horrified…which made Skylar start laughing.

This was her life. Bags under her eyes. Assassins hunting her. Wearing an engagement ring that wasn't hers. Making out with a man who was insanely tempting but completely off limits. Having her heart bleed for a family she'd just met.

It was insanity.

But was it better than the alternative? Working hundred-hour weeks, afraid to live, broken, numb, and alone?

She looked at herself more closely, and noticed, for the first time in a long time, there was life in her eyes. Spark. Anticipation.

She breathed deeply, realizing that she felt alive. Out of her depth, sure. A little traumatized? Absolutely. But most importantly, alive, with a chance to try on a life and see how it felt.

Maybe walking into that gunfight hadn't been to save Logan.

Maybe it had been to save herself from the quicksand that she'd allowed herself to drown in.

The CIA could have decided to stash her in a safe house somewhere. Instead, she was in Wyoming, on a huge ranch, with a bunch of people who had the skills and desire to keep her safe. Good people who had faced the worst and figured out how to thrive. Beauty. Family.

And Logan. Logan.

They weren't complete, she and Logan. That kiss had been something else. Skimming the surface. He was broken. She was…not broken…but in the process of it, for sure.

But when they were together…there was something between them.

And she wanted to pursue it. Him. This temporary life. This temporary family. This opportunity for them both to finally heal what was holding them back.

Voices echoed through the house, and this time, she smiled when she heard someone say her name and ask where she was. If there was one thing she'd learned from her dad, it was that life offered chances all day long, and only fools turned them down.

She had three weeks. Or less. Or more. What was she going to do with it?

Mope around? Or try to use the chance to begin to move past the demons that had held her captive for so long and get busy living?

She stared at herself in the mirror. "Get busy living, of course."

One of her biggest demons was trust. Logan had a lot of issues, clearly, but trustworthiness wasn't one of them. Maybe he could teach her to trust again, and in return, she could help bring a smile back to his face. He'd sworn he'd stay by her side to make sure she was safe, and she believed him.

And the fact Logan was hot, tempting, and distracting? Completely irrelevant.

Skylar let out her breath. She could do this. Stay chill. Enjoy the ride. Make the most of the opportunity. Refuse to allow a professional killer and other fun stuff to haunt her.

She splashed some water over her face and took a deep breath. "I got this."

She took one last look at her face, grinned at the sparkle in her eyes, and then went out to meet her future in-laws.