Aria by Jennifer Hartmann

Epilogue

Noah stepped inside his front door, dropping his keys onto the entry table. They clinked against the glass surface, and Noah hoped he hadn’t woken Beth or the boys.

The house was dark and quiet as he descended the staircase, his footsteps heavy. New photos adorned his hallway walls, a constant reminder of the beautiful life he had made for himself. As Noah stepped inside the bedroom with tired feet, he used the flashlight on his phone to light his path. Beth lay curled up in their bed, wrapped tightly in the sheets and blankets. Noah couldn’t help but smile at how peaceful she looked.

As Noah peeled off his jacket, his eyes were drawn to the small drawer of his nightstand. He hesitated, then approached the side of the bed and sat down. The mattress sunk beneath his weight. He carefully opened the drawer, glancing at Beth as the hinges creaked in rebellion. She stirred for a moment and then fell still. Noah reached inside the bedside drawer and pulled out a piece of green construction paper. He pressed it between his fingertips, memorizing the feel of its coarse and pulpy texture. He turned his cell phone towards the paper and watched as the words were illuminated under his gaze. Noah’s breath hitched in his throat as his eyes read over the familiar handwriting.

Dear Noah,

I’m not sure how I’m supposed to fit everything in my heart into one letter, but I’ll try. You’ve probably noticed by now that I’m gone. I know if I tried to tell you this in person, you would convince me to stay and I would give in. I’m weak when it comes to you. I suppose we are all weak when it comes to love.

I do love you. I love you so much I’m sitting here sobbing as I write this, second guessing myself with every stroke of my pen. But I need to do this. I can’t be with you, Noah. I can’t be with anyone right now. I’m broken, and I don’t want to hurt you.

I know that sounds contradictory. I’m hurting you with this letter. But that’s not what I mean. I’m talking about the dark, ugly hurt. I can’t possibly make you happy if I can’t even make myself happy. I know you probably can’t see it because you are consumed with anger. But I promise… one day you’ll understand. One day you’ll see why I needed to do this. And only then, when you are exquisitely happy and your life is full of beautiful things, you will thank me.

You said we were a duet. I wish I could be your second half. I wish I could be a part of your perfect duet. But I am an aria. I am meant to fly alone.

I wish so many wonderful things for you. I hope you find love again and continue to make music. I hope all your dreams come true. I hope one day, when the anger has subsided and you are lying in bed with the woman you love, you will read this letter again. I hope you’ll read it in a new light and see how everything is exactly as it should be.

Thank you for everything you’ve done for me. Thank you for believing in me when I couldn’t. Thank you for all the nights you stayed up with me as I bared my soul to you. Thank you for the movie dates, the homemade pancakes, the laughs over whiskey, and everything in between. Thank you for Sam.

I love you, Noah. No matter what happens, you will always be the only song in my heart.

You will be my aria.

Love, Chelsie

Noah stared at the jaded green paper for a long time before tucking it back into the drawer of his nightstand. He ran a hand over his weary face, visions of Chelsie filtering through his thoughts. He sat there in the darkness for what felt like a lifetime before pulling at the covers and climbing into bed. He scooted over to the opposite side where Beth was sleeping and pulled her close, nuzzling his face against her hair. She instinctively inched herself against him and squeezed his hand as she fell back into a quiet sleep.

Noah was happy – exquisitely happy. He loved Beth with all his heart.

Chelsie had been right all along.

When he closed his eyes, exhaustion overtook him, and Noah drifted off into a familiar place in his dreams. It was there that he found her. She was sitting at his kitchen table, shoveling pancakes into her mouth and laughing with Sam.

“Easy there, tiger,” he said with a wink.

Chelsie stood up from her chair and strolled over to him, her silk robe trailing languidly behind her. “I can’t help it. You know I love your pancakes.”

“And you know I love you.”

Noah kissed her mouth and he could almost taste the sticky, sweet syrup on her lips.

“Noah, our song is playing. Will you dance with me?”

He paused for a moment, trying to hear the music. “I don’t hear anything,” he said.

She grinned. “I do.”

And so, they danced in his kitchen to a silent song, holding each other close and moving their bodies together in perfect time.

Chelsie laughed, her long, blonde hair cascading all around her as Noah spun her in a circle. She looked up at him then, her emerald eyes gleaming with unparalleled joy. Noah had always said he could get lost in those eyes.

And in his dreams, he did.

The End.

** The story continues with “Coda” – the second and final installment, due for release summer of 2020! **