Lost and Found Family by Jennifer Ryan

“I’m four and I know all the numbers of the alphabet.” Nick said.

“It’s not numbers, it’s letters,” Jack corrected. “He’s still a baby. He gets mixed up.”

Nick persisted. “I am not a baby. Mama says I’m a big boy now. I go to pre-K.”

Luke had worried about leaving Sarah with Ace, but listening to the boys chatter as they made their way to the horses outside made him smile. So full of energy; it felt good to hold them in his arms with their little hands clinging to his shoulders.

Luke pretended the boys were weighing him down. “You’re both big boys.” He hefted them up a bit higher. “That’s why you get to ride these big horses.”

“I want the brown one,” Nick yelled.

“They’re both brown, dummy,” Jack said to his brother.

“Jack, don’t call Nick names. That’s not nice. Now, which brown one do you want, Nick?” Luke loved how Nick concentrated with his eyes narrowed and his mouth quirked in a crooked frown.

“The one that’s all brown. The other one has a white nose. I don’t want that one.”

“Okay, Stella is yours. Jack, you get Mandy. Both these girls are great riding horses. They’re very gentle. First, we’re going to introduce ourselves to them, and then we’ll go over the rules before we ride. Deal?”

In unison the boys echoed Luke, “Deal.”

Luke set the boys down and walked them up to the waiting horses and one of his ranch hands, Miguel. As if on cue, the horses lowered their heads to the boys, ready for a pat. The boys enthusiastically stroked the horses.

“She tickled my hand. Her nose is soft.” Jack pulled his hand back to his chest. “Nick, she tickled me.”

Nick patted Stella’s soft nose. “Yeah, mine tickles, too. Let’s go for a ride!”

“Okay, boys, here are the rules. You have to wear these helmets, just in case you fall off.” Luke plunked a helmet on each of their heads. “Hold on to the reins.” Luke held them up. “These straps here. Don’t pull. And no yelling at the horses. Loud noises scare them. The last rule is that you have to do exactly what Miguel and I tell you to do. Deal?”

“Deal.”

“Deal.”

“Okay. Buckle your helmets. Let’s go over to the indoor training ring and Miguel and I will teach you how to ride.”

Luke and Miguel settled the boys up in the saddles. Their faces lit up with the kind of joy Luke hadn’t felt in too long to remember. Nerves replaced some of that excitement when the horses jostled them a bit while they walked down to the ring, but half an hour later, and several rounds about the ring, the boys were back to having a ball.

Luke nodded to Miguel and they stepped away as Jack and Nick rode on. “You’re on your own, boys.”

“I’m doing it.” The pride in Jack’s eyes made Luke’s chest tight.

“Me, too,” Nick whispered, not wanting to spook his mount.

Jack laughed with excitement and Luke couldn’t help but smile at the little boy. He was so cute and full of fun.

Luke remembered what it had been like as a kid getting up on a horse for the first time and trying to outride his younger brother. His father and mother taught them just as Luke had taught Jack and Nick. He remembered the pride in his father’s eyes when he watched them ride.

Luke felt a pang in his heart. His brother, Jason, had found love and started a family of his own. Luke loved his niece and sometimes found himself feeling jealous of his little brother.

Yesterday, seeing the boys with their mom, he’d felt that twinge of envy again.

He’d love to see his own boys riding the horses and running around the ranch like he and his brother had done for so many years. Maybe a little girl, her long hair waving in the wind.

He really wanted a family.

Not going to happen without the right woman. And he’d tired of the dating game, because that’s exactly how it felt.

Women had become a convenient date for whatever business or social obligation he had to attend and a warm body in his bed to fulfill his physical needs. Even the sex felt stale, a moment’s distraction. All of it left him empty in more ways than one.

He’d let it happen.

He’d made it happen.

Which is why he’d stopped dating months ago.

He’d really wanted to try with his last girlfriend, but she lived in Silicon Valley and the drive out to the ranch in Carmel and back to Silicon Valley grew to be a chore for both of them. She found excuses to be there while he made it clear his place was at the ranch. The whole thing fizzled out. At least she hadn’t stolen his credit card and racked up a huge bill like the woman he dated before her.

But the thief and the relationship-going-nowhere punctuated Luke’s dating bad luck. So he focused on the ranch, giving himself time to be alone and figure out what he really wanted.

A kind, loving woman who would be a best friend and partner and a house full of happiness and sweet—and a little wild—kids.

Nick turned to him. “Are you watching?”

“I am, buddy. Great job.”

Pride lit Nick’s eyes and he sat up straighter.

It felt damn good to give Nick that sense of accomplishment and be a part of his life if only in a small way. Luke hoped Nick remembered today and how brave and free he felt riding.

“Sit up in the saddle, Jack. You guys are doing great. Wait until your mom sees you.”

“Where is Mommy?” Nick asked.

Luke tried not to let his worry for Sarah overwhelm him. “She’ll be here soon.”

At that moment, Ace sprinted across the road and into the field with Sarah riding bareback low over his neck. Her hair flew out behind her like Ace’s tail. Woman and horse appeared to be in flight.

His heart raced. True fear clamped his lungs tight and stopped his heart. Sarah was a little bit of a thing, and Ace was a huge stallion. If she fell, she could be seriously injured or killed at the speed Ace galloped.

Just when he was about to go after her, Jack called out to him, “Look at Mommy go. I want to ride like that.”

Jack set his feet wide to kick his horse and make her take off, but Luke scolded, “Don’t!” Jack slowly lowered his feet. “It’s dangerous. You could get hurt. Remember the rules we talked about?”

“Yes. No going faster than a walk, or I could fall and hurt myself.”

“That’s right. We’ll have to tell your mommy that when she gets back.” Luke had a few other choice words for her about being reckless with his horse and her life.

His anger simmered, but he continued instructing the boys, watching their progress around the arena. Fifteen minutes later, Ace and Sarah returned from the field and headed for the arena entrance. She trotted in, and although Luke was steaming mad, he couldn’t help but notice Sarah looked magnificent. Flushed from the ride, a huge smile graced her beautiful face for the boys. She matched Ace’s pace to that of the boys and their horses.

“Hi, boys. Having fun? You look like real cowboys.”

“Like Luke?” Jack asked.

“You sure do. Keep practicing, I’m going to talk to him.”

He tried to keep his voice low, but he really wanted to yell. “Are you crazy? That horse could kill you, and you take off bareback on him with no regard for his safety, or yours.”

“You don’t have to snap at me. I’m an experienced rider, and Ace is a great horse.”

“He’s a very expensive horse, and I can’t take the chance that he’ll get hurt with you riding him like a maniac. What the hell were you thinking?”

“Listen, I took care of your horse and exercised out his frustration from the morning. I can see you’re upset, but the horse is fine.”

He kept his concern on the horse because thinking about her being hurt still made his anger and fear rise. “He’s got a bad hoof. Did the doc take care of it?”

“The hoof is fine. Nothing but a stone. You need to fire that terrible vet. Ace doesn’t trust him. I don’t either, for that matter.”

“Is that so?” He didn’t like her telling him what to do on his ranch. But maybe she had a point. He’d been having doubts about the vet’s skills and lack of enthusiasm for his job.

“He doesn’t keep his tools clean, he has no patience with temperamental horses, he’s arrogant, and he lacks common sense when it comes to dealing with irate horses. You should contact Dr. Fields. She works at a ranch I know about. She’s great with horses and is building a reputable list of clients.”

He usually didn’t mind someone making suggestions, but something about her showing up and taking authority of his prized horse and sending him off to babysit rubbed him the wrong way and his mouth ran away with him. “Taking care of Ace for me is one thing, telling me who I should hire and fire is something else. I run this ranch, and I make the decisions. You don’t get to take over just because you feel like it. Maybe that worked with Sean when you took over his life and business, but it won’t work with me.”

The stillness in her unsettled him.

He’d gone too far, and said things he didn’t really mean.

By the look in her eyes, he’d hurt her feelings, but she quickly hid that away and blanked out everything on her face.

She swung her leg over Ace’s back, slid down his side, and landed on the dirt. Her leg gave out, but she caught herself. He thought he saw a flash of pain, but she turned away before he could really tell.

He looked Ace over for any sign he’d been hurt or favored his back leg. The horse looked fine and stared adoringly at Sarah, irritating Luke even more.

She gave him that blank look again. “Thank you for teaching the boys to ride. I’m sorry I missed the lesson, but it appears they’ve learned a lot in a short time. I appreciate your taking the time with them. They’ll never forget it.” With that sincere gratitude, she turned and walked to where the two boys had halted their horses in order to watch their exchange, making him regret raising his voice and talking about Sean in front of them.

“Come down now, boys. It’s time for lunch.”

The boys dismounted just like he taught them, with an assist from Sarah.

Luke wanted to put a stop to this, but didn’t know what to say.

She tied the horses’ reins to the arena fence, grabbed both boys by the hands, and turned them to face him. “Thank Luke for the riding lesson.”

“Thank you, Luke.” Nick looked downright sad about cutting the day short.

“Thank you,” Jack said to the ground, then turned his disappointed gaze to Sarah. “Mom, I thought we were going to see the whole ranch and have lunch with Luke.”

“It’s time to go. No arguments.”

The disappointment on the boys’ faces cut Luke deep.

Before he could say anything else, Sarah turned her back on him, and took the boys with her. He should go after her and apologize for yelling and . . . and what? Being stupid. The truth was he had no idea why he was mad, except that ever since he’d seen her yesterday, he couldn’t stop analyzing his life. And he didn’t like what he was thinking.

Ace fussed again, so Luke turned his back on Sarah and the boys to calm the horse. He ignored the sound of their car driving away and the loneliness that settled over him.

“Where’d they all go?” Jerry asked, coming up behind him.

“They left.” Luke’s tone and stance should have warned Jerry he didn’t want to talk and was working on a good mad.

Jerry ignored the danger signs. “Well, I hope you thanked Sarah for what she did. She was amazing with Ace. She sings like an angel, too.”

“Yeah, she does.” He feared her voice would haunt him forever. “She told me I should fire the doc. Can you believe that? She’s not here more than an hour and she’s telling me what to do, like she runs the place.”

Jerry stuffed his hands in his front pockets. “I agree with her. I don’t know what the doc was thinking, but every time she told him to stay back he’d get closer to Ace, agitating him. She’d calm Ace all over again. When she gave Ace his shots, he didn’t even flinch. He just moved closer to her, so that he could touch her. Besides all that, she had to clean several pieces of Doc’s equipment before she used them on Ace.”

“I thought Ace just got nervous around the vet because he knew there’d be a poke or pain.” Luke rubbed his hand down Ace’s nose. “You really stood still for her?” He spoke to the horse, but Jerry answered for him.

“Yep. He didn’t even try to nip her all the while she checked every inch of him, nose to tail. Ask me, he’d have never cut himself if the doc showed any patience toward him. Doc hated that you asked Sarah to tend to Ace and did nothing but cause trouble the whole time she was working on him. Doc treated her downright rude.”

“What’d she do? Bitch and moan about it the whole time.”

“Nope, not a word. She kept singing to Ace, keeping him calm, and doing everything that needed to be done. She must have brushed him from head to tail four, maybe five times.”

He eyed Jerry, seeing the admiration in his eyes. “So you like her?”

“What’s not to like? She’s beautiful, sings better than any person I’ve ever heard on the radio, and treated your stubborn horse like a precious baby. Why are you being so hard on her?”

Luke wanted to kick his own ass. “I don’t know.” Because she might have screwed over Sean.

Because she got under his skin and he wasn’t sure he could trust her.

Jerry shook his head in dismay. “Ask me, you should’ve been a little more hospitable to your guest, especially after she worked her ass off for you.”

He raised a brow at Jerry’s tone. “Is that so?”

“God’s truth. I never seen Doc work that hard on Ace, on any animal, or for you.”

The rebuke properly cowed him. “Shit. How am I going to make it up to Sarah?”

“Seems to me a thank-you would do. I think she’d appreciate a simple kindness. She showed enough of it.”

“I don’t know any woman who only wants a simple thank-you.”

“She’s not like other women.” Jerry gave him a you’re-an-idiot look, hooked a lead rope on Ace, and walked him back toward the stables, calling over his shoulder, “It’s not like you to run off a good-looking women. Ask me, that one was a keeper.”

Was she? Margaret didn’t think so. In fact, she blamed Sarah for Sean’s untimely death. She painted a very disturbing picture of Sarah’s past.

But was it true?

He pulled his cell from his back pocket and hit the speed dial despite the fact he didn’t want to go down this road. “Dean, it’s Luke. I have a job for you.”

“You haven’t taken a new client in a while,” his top investigator said.

Yeah, he’d been focused on the ranch. He needed time away from helping people who broke the law circumvent the system, outright get away with their crimes, or serve far less time than they deserved. He had some innocent clients, but most had earned the charges against them and paid him a ton of money to get them out of trouble.

He not only wanted to know, but needed to know which side of the legal line Sarah stood on.

“I’m helping out a friend who is having difficulty getting regular visitations with her grandchildren.” True. But also not exactly a clear picture of the situation. Sarah had brought the children as requested. “Anyway, I need you to dig up everything you can on Sarah Spencer. She runs Spencer Software. I’m particularly interested in an arrest for arson when she was a teen.”

“Those records are probably sealed, boss.”

Luke sighed. “I know you can get them.” Whatever Luke asked for, Dean produced. Dean had contacts everywhere.

“It’ll cost you.”

He had no doubt. “Whatever it costs. I need those records and any others you find.”

“On it. Bad moms are the worst.”

He felt like shit for doing this. From what he’d seen, Sarah was a good mom. She’d done nothing to warrant this kind of intrusive probe into her past.

He just couldn’t live without knowing who she really was. He wasn’t even sure he’d share whatever he found with Margaret.

“Just get it done discreetly and quickly.”

“I’ll let you know as soon as I know.” Dean hung up.

Luke wondered if he’d just made a huge mistake.

He glanced around the arena. All of a sudden, the ranch felt quiet and empty.

He wanted it to feel like home, not just a place to hang and sleep. But he feared it would never really feel that way because home included the people who loved you.

And he lived alone.

Maybe he deserved it for some of the shit he’d done in his career. Like picking apart a woman’s life for no good reason. He was proud of most of his cases. He’d helped a lot of people, but a few of his clients left a black mark on his heart.

He really hoped he didn’t make things worse with Sarah.

He took Stella’s and Mandy’s reins and led them out of the training ring toward the barn to put them back in their stalls so he could check on Ace and deal with the vet. But all he really thought about was how badly he’d handled things with Sarah.