Beauty and the Beastly Highlander by Kenna Kendrick

Chapter Thirty

Etna caught up with Lochlan just as the man made it to the front gates of the castle. Lochlan had been riding so fast that Etna didn’t dare match his speed with Malina on the saddle. He was like a man possessed, and it seemed to her as though he didn’t want to lay eyes upon another human.

So, Etna left him alone, not speaking to him as they dismounted their horses. She could respect that Lochlan needed space and that she would only make things worse if she tried to make him feel better.

He needs to be on his own for noo. There’s nothin’ I can do to help him.

But even though Etna thought that the best course of action was to leave him be for a while, Arlene seemed to have a different opinion. Of course, Etna couldn’t blame her. She didn’t know what had happened down at the lake.

Etna saw Arlene rush out of the castle, her legs carrying her with a surprising speed for her age. When she got to them, she grabbed Malina, a sob of relief bursting out of her. Then, once she had reassured herself that Malina was safe, she urged her to go into the castle and to her chambers.

Once she was gone, Arlene turned to look at Etna and Lochlan, looking at them both with the same concerned look she had given Malina.

“Are ye two alright?” she asked. “Where is Finley? What happened?”

Etna glanced at Lochlan, but the man wouldn’t even look at Arlene. He shook his head quietly before he began to walk away, despite Arlene’s protests.

“Lochlan!” she called after him. “Where are ye goin’? What happened?”

“Wait,” Etna said, placing a gentle hand on Arlene’s shoulder. “I’ll tell ye everythin’. Let him go. He needs some time.”

Arlene frowned at her in that way that always had Etna telling her everything. She led her inside the castle with that hand on her shoulder and asked one of the servants to bring them some tea, but Arlene was quick to interrupt.

“It doesna seem like a night for tea,” she said. “Bring the whiskey.”

As they sat in the drawing-room, Etna tried to find the right words to explain everything that had happened to Arlene. She had already gone through enough excitement for one day, and at her age, she didn’t want to upset her any further. But as she told her everything, Arlene kept her composure. By the end of it all, she seemed relieved over everything else.

“At least everyone is safe,” she said. “And Finley can stop worryin’ about those brigands.”

“Arlene . . . did ye ken?” Etna asked, too curious for her own good. “Did ye ken about Anna’s death?”

“If ye’re askin’ if I kent that Finley killed her, then aye,” she said. “He never told me the entire story. I only kent that he killed her and that it wasna his fault. I never doubted it. He really did love that woman. He could have never done any harm to her out of malice.”

Etna remained silent, not knowing what to say. A part of her wished that she could have known Finley before he had changed before his marriage to Anna, and her death had turned him into a completely different person. But she had also grown to love the man he was now, and she couldn’t imagine anyone different.

“Ye’re doin’ him a lot of good,” Arlene told her then, with a small smile on her lips. “He has changed verra much since ye first came here. Noo, if only there was someone like that for Lochlan . . . it seems like the lad will need it. Weel, Etna . . . did ye ken?”

“About Mairi and Lochlan?” Etna asked, and when Arlene nodded, she hesitated, unsure of what to say. But if she lied to her, Arlene would know. She always knew. “Aye, I did. I saw them together once, and then Lochlan told me everythin’. But had I kent about her, I—”

“Ye couldna have kent,” Arlene said. “Na one could. We all thought that Mairi was a good lass. She wouldna have been the best match for Lochlan, but I would be more inclined to allow him to marry her than to marry him off to some of the noble lasses.”

Etna didn’t miss how Arlene spoke about permission, and she didn’t doubt that even though Finley was the Laird, she had plenty of influence over what the two brothers did, especially in their personal lives. But she doubted that what Lochlan needed at that moment was another woman, and she hoped that she wouldn’t meddle right away.

“Weel, I think it’s time for me to retire for the night,” Arlene said after knocking back the rest of her whiskey. “Goodnight, dear. And thank ye.”

Etna was too surprised by the way Arlene had knocked back half the bottle of whiskey while the two of them were talking to wonder what she could have possibly thanked her for. She had done what anyone would have done. She didn’t need a thank you.

Tired as she was, she decided to head to her chambers too, but the moment her head hit the pillow, she found it impossible to sleep. Her mind was swarming with thoughts, replaying what had happened that night over and over. She tossed and turned, but no matter how much she tried, sleep evaded her. And so, the gentle knock on her door made her sit upright with a frown, worry brewing inside her at the thought that something else had happened.

* * *

When Finley returned to the castle after rounding up the prisoners and helping with the injured men, he cleaned himself up, washed the blood off his skin, and then tried to sleep. But the excitement of the day was still lingering over him, making it impossible to rest.

Hesitantly, he made his way to Etna’s chambers, knocking softly on her door to not wake her if she was already asleep. But the door soon opened, and Etna stood before him, looking radiant even after everything she had been through.

Finley immediately pulled her into his arms, letting his head fall on her shoulder. For a moment, Etna seemed to not know what to do, but then her arms wrapped around him, pulling him into the room.

When their lips met, Finley’s shoulders relaxed, and he closed his eyes with a sigh, finally feeling at ease. He rested his forehead against Etna’s own, laughing when she went cross-eyed, looking at him.

“What’s so funny, me Laird?” Etna asked, but there was a smile on her lips, too, though only for a moment. When it disappeared, it was replaced by a concern that Finley hated seeing on her face.

If only I could take all her worries away like she took mine.

Of course, he knew that it wasn’t that simple. He, too, was still worried, about Malina, about Lochlan, and about Etna. They had all been through so much that day, and Finley didn’t know how long it would take for all of them to recover. But he was determined to be by their sides, to protect Etna and Malina and make amends with Lochlan.

“Is everyone alright?” Etna asked. “The wounded?”

“The healer is tendin’ to them all,” Finley assured her as the two of them sat on the edge of her bed. “He says they will all recover. We dinna have any dead on our side. And with the brigands that we captured, it’s only a matter of time before we find whoever is left.”

Finley wasn’t convinced that all the brigands had been there that night. He was certain that there were many more of them, and he wouldn’t stop until all of them were captured or dead.

“And Lochlan?” Finley asked. “Ye came back with him, did ye na?”

“Aye, I did,” Etna said. “But I havena seen him since then. I thought that it would be best if I gave him some time.”

“I suppose that is for the best,” Finley agreed. He would talk to him before long, but as things were, he wanted to give him some time to mourn. Despite everything that Mairi had done, love wasn’t something that Lochlan could simply stop feeling. Finley had gone through the very same thing.

“What about ye?” Etna asked as though she could read his thoughts. “After everythin’, ye heard . . .”

Her voice trailed off and her gaze held such sorrow that Finley leaned closer, trying to kiss it away. After all, he had never been good at talking, and kissing was better than discussing something that painful. But Etna quickly pulled back, cupping his cheek with her hand and giving him an insistent look.

“Tell me,” she said. “Ye canna hide how ye feel forever, Finley. It’s na good for ye.”

Shrugging a shoulder, Finley fell back onto the bed, stretching his arms over his head. It had been a while since he had last let his guard down like that around another person, but it felt good to do so. It felt natural with Etna.

“I dinna ken,” he said. “It all sounds like a nightmare. To find out that Anna wasna the person I thought she was at all . . . I always wondered why she turned against me, but I couldna have thought that she had hated me for so long. I thought . . . I thought that she loved me; I truly did. But I suppose I was wrong. Our entire relationship was a lie.”

Etna couldn’t even begin to imagine the kind of burden that realization could have placed on Finley. At least now, it seemed that he had some sort of closure, the answers he had gotten from Mairi explaining everything that he needed to know.

“To be honest, I had often wondered if there was someone else,” Finley admitted with a sigh. “I thought perhaps she could love two people at once, but . . . if she had told me, I would have understood. Or at least I’d like to think I would. I loved her, and if I couldna make her happy but someone else could, then I’d let her go. Even if that someone was Mairi. It would have been difficult for them, but perhaps I could have helped them if she had told me. Perhaps we could have . . .”

Finley’s voice trailed off, and Etna could see the gears turning in his mind, trying to find a solution for something that was long over. “Dinna think about that noo,” she said. “Ye’re only torturin’ yerself.”

“At least it was a relief to hear that she loved Malina,” Finley continued, not addressing Etna’s concerns. “Malina loved her, too. She loved her dearly. I remember the two of them bein’ inseparable. I dinna ken what I would do if I found out that she hated her own bairn as much as she hated me.”

Etna placed a hand on Finley’s shoulder with a soft sigh, nodding slowly. “I’m sorry this happened to ye, Finley,” she said. “I wish I could make it better.”

“Ye do,” Finley said, turning to look at her with a small, hesitant smile. “Ye really do, Etna. Ye came here, and ye changed everythin’. Ye changed me. Just bein’ around ye makes me a happier man. So, dinna think that ye need to do anything else.”

Finley’s words startled Etna. She had never expected to hear such an admission from him, but that only made the confession that much sweeter. Pulling him closer, she gave him a short, chaste kiss, but before she could pull back, Finley claimed her lips once more, that kiss more intense than the one before.

Finley cupped Etna’s cheek with his hand, looking right into her eyes when he pulled back. “I have another confession to make,” he said, but then he remained silent for what seemed like eons to Etna. She wanted to ask him what it was, to push him, but she stopped herself, knowing that he would tell her once he was ready. “I . . . I love ye, Etna. I didna want to admit it for a verra long time, but I can finally admit it noo. I love ye.”

Etna’s chest tightened, her jaw-dropping at Finley’s confession. It must have taken her a long time to react, she thought, because he began to pull away, and she could see that he was instantly building those walls around him once more, his expression becoming unreadable.

But she stopped him before he could get too far, her hand shooting out to grip his arm. “I love ye, too,” she said. “I never thought I’d hear those words from ye, Finley. Forgive me for bein’ startled, but I’m tellin’ ye the truth. I do love ye. So, so much.”

Etna thought for a moment that Finley wouldn’t believe her, at least at first. She wouldn’t blame him for it. He had already been through so much that it was only natural he would be careful. But then he smiled, giving her the widest smile she had ever seen on his face, and pulled her on top of him, making her squeal in surprise.

“Will ye stay the night?” Etna asked him, aching to have him close after everything that had happened. With Finley around, she felt safer, as though nothing and no one could touch her.

Finley glanced at Etna’s fists that were curled around the fabric of his shirt, clinging onto him almost desperately. He nodded, perhaps realizing that she felt safer with him around, and the two of them got under the covers, Finley pulling Etna against his chest. She laid her head on his shoulder, her fingers tracing patterns on his skin until she finally began to fall asleep, her eyes getting heavier with every breath that she took.

Before darkness encompassed her, she heard Finley whisper those three words to her once more, and when she slept, she did so with a smile on her lips.