God of Wrath (Legacy of Gods #3) by Rina Kent

My fingers tremble and shivers snake down my back and into the pit of my stomach.

“I guess Aunt Kim was right when she mentioned having a bad feeling about him,” Ava continues, oblivious to the sound that’s invading my head.

Tick.

Tick.

Tick.

“Yeah. This is so creepy. You really don’t know what people are hiding.” Glyn hugs herself. “But how did you hear about him turning himself in?”

“Uh, hello? It was all over the news. He’s the son of a higher-up in some ministry, and many are speculating that maybe his father is using his son as a scapegoat to hide his crimes. So he’s also under investigation. Following this whole charade is popcorn-worthy, I tell you.”

Mum and Papa probably saw the news, too. Is that why Mum told me she was there for me if I needed to talk about anything this morning?

“Cecy?” Ava grabs my arm, her voice spooked. “Oh my God, why are you crying?”

I pat at my eyes, only for my hand to be flooded with tears. Everything I’ve bottled up for years rushes to the surface like a tornado taking out everything in its wake.

My heart shrivels, my tears won’t stop flowing, and then everything just…pops.

“Ces.” Glyn’s eyes water as she grabs my arm. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”

“I’m not,” I admit, my voice low and emotional. Usually, I would never show them this part of me. I hate being vulnerable, even with my closest friends, but I can’t fight it this time.

“Jonah…drugged me until I couldn’t move, but he made sure I was still aware of my surroundings so I’d feel it when he tried to assault me. The only thing that stopped him was his revulsion when I threw up all over him.”

Ava’s lips part. Glyn’s eyes water.

Both of them are caught in a state of shock, and I understand. There was a time when I honestly never thought the day would come where I’d talk about that experience out loud. I thought if I buried it deeper, if I dealt with it on my own, it’d be over.

Turns out, the exact opposite happened. That night devoured my spirit and consumed my life. It wasn’t until Ava mentioned it the other time that I realized how much I changed after that incident. Yes, I was always an introvert, but it was only after that trauma that I closed in on myself. I quit wearing dresses and skirts and switched to jeans and sarcastic T-shirts because that could help drive attention away. Baggy, unflattering clothes. Just anything that didn’t make me as pretty as that night.

I know it’s a victim-blaming mentality, but the moment I realized that, it was too late. My soul had already darkened, and nothing was left to be salvaged.

“You know how sometimes I zone out?” I continue, staring at the TV, which is playing some Netflix film. “It’s because of that. I also have severe sleep paralysis that’s an imitation of that night. I feel everything around me, but I can’t move. I scream for help, but no one can hear me. Before you ask, I couldn’t report him, because he had nude pictures of me that he would’ve made public and sent to Papa. He would have used them to ruin my grandparents' political and diplomatic reputations. My mum’s career. Everything. I just… I just didn’t want them to see me like that.”

I choke on my last word, and Ava envelops me in a hug.

“Oh, Cecy.” She cries in my neck, her tears slipping down my skin.

Glyn wraps her arms around me, too, sniffling quietly. “I’m so sorry, Ces. I’m so sorry we weren’t there.”

“You didn’t know. I made sure no one knew. Not even Papa or Mum. I thought I’d be fine, but I’m not. I thought everything would be okay, but I’m tired of pretending to be something I’m not. I’m so tired.”

The three of us cry in unison as they hug me tightly, shaking against me, their hands unsteady, as if they can feel every burst of my pain.

I hate that I’ve turned them into this mess, that I’ve become a burden, but I still take every bit of their support and cooing words.

Ava pulls back, her eyes red, face a mess of tears and snot. A look she hasn’t allowed anyone to see since she was a kid.

“I understand why you couldn’t or didn’t want to tell us, but if we had known, I would’ve killed that fucker with my bare hands.”

“I wasn’t ready to talk about it. I don’t think I am now either, but talking about it is the first step to getting over it. Besides, I didn’t want you guys to feel burdened by this.”

“Bullshit.” Glyn sniffles at my side. “We’ve been together since we were in nappies, Ces. We’re sisters from different misters, meaning we’re there for each other for better or worse.”

“Why would we feel burdened by a situation in which you were a victim? That’s bollocks! He should be the one feeling all these emotions and worse. He should apologize for being a fucking subhuman.” Ava’s voice breaks. “I’m sorry we didn’t notice.”

“You couldn’t have. I spent that summer with my grandparents and Uncle Kirian to recharge, so neither you nor my parents noticed anything. Now that you mentioned he turned himself in, I felt a tinge of relief mixed with anger at myself because he assaulted someone else. If I’d reported him that first time, he wouldn’t have done it again.”