Merciless Union by Faith Summers

37

Lucca

“What happened to her?” I blurt, racing over to Aria.

What the hell happened? She looked fine. She played the violin. She actually played like she was herself again, and nothing had changed.

Dr. Belmont is already at her side checking her vitals. “Call 911, now.”

I stop in my tracks, panic wreaking havoc inside me as I reach for my phone. When I dial the number, he grabs the phone from me. I stay by Aria’s side and hold her cold, clammy hands.

“This is Dr. Belmont, consultant Psychiatrist here,” Dr. Belmont begins, but he doesn’t take his eyes off me. “One of my patients just fainted. I’ve checked her vitals; she’s breathing but unresponsive. I need an ambulance now. She has very high blood pressure, and she’s pregnant.”

Everything inside my being freezes at the word pregnant.

At first, I look at Dr. Belmont, and I try to process what he actually said. Then I look at my girl and take in her tiny body so lifeless in front of me.

I look from her rosy red lips and trail down to her flat stomach.

Pregnant…

Aria’s pregnant, and I never knew.

I tune out everything else Dr. Belmont is saying and only snap back to reality when he joins me on the ground and wipes away the blood seeping from Aria’s nose with a tissue.

I look at him and find he’s already looking at me. And he must know I’m pissed as fuck he didn’t tell me.

He didn’t say he thought she was. He knew it.

“Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”

He shakes his head. “Not now, Lucca, not now. Deal with me after. The ambulance is on their way.”

The next minute sirens wail in the distance, and when the paramedics get here, I watch them check her.

My heart sinks when they decide to take her in.

I ride in the back of the ambulance with her, and it’s not until we reach the hospital that she opens her eyes and looks at me.

She squeezes my hand when I hold it, and then she’s gone again.

Thankfully she wakes once more, but this time the doctors take over, and I’m left to wait in the private waiting room. Dr. Belmont comes in looking uneasy.

I want to hit him and knock his teeth down his throat, but I hold back. I only do it because I know the only reason he didn’t tell me was because she asked him not to. I’m still enraged, though.

“This was exactly the kind of thing you should have told me,” I seethe.

“I know, and I blame myself.” He nods. “She asked me not to say anything.

She wanted to get her head around it because there was so much going on. Today she promised to tell you on Sunday.”

“When did she find out?”

“Last week. She’s nearly two weeks pregnant.”

Indeed there was all manner of hell going on, but if she knew last week, then there would have been other reasons why she didn’t tell me. The answer is simple.

It’s me.

I’m the reason. I gave her a reason not to tell me. Even with the fucking shit with Damien.

“I wish I’d known.”

“I know, and I apologize. It’s a sensitive subject, and I didn’t want to push her when she wasn’t ready. I didn’t know what was going on in her head at first when she said she wanted to think about it.”

“Please tell me she wants to keep it,” I sound like I’m begging.

“She does. That’s as much as we’ve discussed.”

While I feel relief, I think of the only thing she’s asked of me. She wanted to leave, and she hasn’t said any different in regard to that. In fact, things have been so rocky we’ve had more bad moments than good ones.

Those happened mainly in that last week when she knew she was carrying my child.

Dr. Belmont rests his hand on my shoulder. “Try not to be mad, Lucca. I’d be mad too, but this isn’t a normal situation. She’s in good hands here. She may need to stay a night or two, but they’ll stabilize her condition, and you guys can take it from there. Alright?”

“It has to be.”

“I’ll call you later. I have appointments I have to get to.”

“Thanks for taking care of her.” I have to acknowledge that. He did a lot of work with her.

“No worries.”

It’s another hour before I get to see her.

When I walk into the little room, she’s awake, but she looks drained out and exhausted.

The doctor I spoke with said they were controlling her blood pressure with medication. They did a scan of her womb, and things were okay with the baby. That’s at least something good to hold on to.

When she looks at me, guilt sweeps over her beautiful face. I’m sure by now she knows I know she’s pregnant, so we can cut past any pretense.

“Hey there,” I say. “How are you feeling?”

“Awful.”

“You’ll feel better soon.”

“I’m sorry, Lucca,” she mutters, looking weaker just for speaking. “I should have told you about the baby. I know the doctors told you. That wasn’t how I wanted you to find out.”

We stare at each other.

“Don’t worry about it now. You need to rest.”

A tear slides down her cheek. “Please say something more than that. I can’t just rest or not worry. There were a lot of reasons why I wanted to wait to tell you.”

“And since I know every single one of those reasons, there’s not a damn thing I can say against you or act like I don’t understand. I do.” I’d only be an asshole if I got mad with her. I still haven’t given her a reason to stay with me, so I can’t get mad that she’d want to take my child and leave me.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“I know.” This is the moment where it’s do or die, the moment when I have to wake the fuck up and take responsibility for my actions. It’s the moment where I have to do the right thing for her and the baby. “I’m going to see this bad spell of shit through, and I will make sure both you and the baby are safe. Then I’ll… set you free.”

“Free?” She looks confused.

“Yes. The only thing I’m asking is that you don’t keep me from my child. They don’t need to know who I am or see me all the time, but there’s no way I can have a child in this world and be absent from their lives.” This is so much harder to say than what I rehearsed. “I’ll look into what I need to do to sever the legal guardianship and our marriage as quickly as possible so you’ll get your complete freedom. You won’t have to do anything more than live the rest of your life free of me.”

The impact of my words leave her skin sheet white. I don’t expect her to say anything.

I don’t want her to.

“Lucca—”

“No.” I hold up my hand. “That’s it.”

“No,” she mutters.

“Yes,” I say with more insistence. “You know I’m right. None of this was ever fair on you. I had no right to demand that you be my wife when I was the one who forced your hand in marriage. I had no right to ever be in your life when I always knew I was going to be destruction to you. We were never meant to be, but it was me who kept pushing. Look what happened to our parents. We have a chance to do better for our child, so we should do it. I loved you too much to let you go, but that’s not the way it works. I should love you enough to set you free. So that’s what I’m doing, Aria De Marchi.”

I turn and walk away, hoping this will be over soon.

Loving her was always my weakness, and right now, I can’t afford to be weak.