Saving Emmy by Rayne Lewis

Chapter 6

The past

Eli opened the door of his truck and helped Ember into the cab. Usually, she just jumped up onto the seat, but the task was a bit more difficult and daunting in the formfitting dress. As she raised her foot onto the running board, the slit running up the side of her dress exposed her pale ivory thigh and Eli had to hold back the gulp that lodged in his throat. Ember was unaware she was making this menial task of getting into his truck a major boner show. If Eli wasn’t able to tamp down his raging libido quickly, it was going to be a real embarrassing night.

Before tonight, she was still the girl who liked boy things. Playing in the dirt, catching frogs and swimming in the creek on a hot summer’s day after fishing from its banks. Camping, hunting, bikes, skateboards and fast cars. She could fix damn near anything. Girl knew more about hardware, plumbing and Do-It-Yourself projects than half the men in rural-town Texas. Though she still loved all those things, she never realized, somewhere along the way, that tomboy grew into a pretty young girl and then into a stunningly, gorgeous lady. It was a pity she never knew how he loved her through all those stages.

The minute he’d taken in the sight of her in the house, Eli had stepped forward, closing the distance between them, oblivious to anyone else in the room but her. She was magnificent. Strikingly beautiful. Sophisticated.

The simpleness of the dress set off her curves, and her hair, falling in tendrils framing her face and pulled back to one side, was a sight that Eli burned into his mind. Never again would he be able to unsee this gorgeous girl...no, not a girl...she was a young lady. All woman.

Eli had never seen a more beautiful sight in his life. It was a bit of a shock to see the tomboy he grew up with transformed into this beauty with just the simplicity of so little. So little, that was so much. She didn’t need a face full of make-up or an over-the-top dress to make a stunning statement. He knew it was the same Emmy in front of him, his best friend, but the femininity standing there was Emmy 2.0.

Ember situated herself in the seat and Eli shut the door, thanking God that the PG-rated peep show was over. He walked around the front of the truck and hopped in, settling onto the bench seat, gave the ignition a start, and the engine came to life with a roar.

“Where’re we going?” Ember asked again.

Eli just turned to her, grinned, put the truck into gear and pulled forward. But, he didn’t head out on the driveway. Instead, he pulled the truck around back behind the house, through the expanse of prairie grass, and up along the side of the barn. He shut down the engine and turned to Ember.

Reaching across the seat, he laced his fingers with hers. “I know you didn’t want to go to the prom, but I really wanted to take you. Actually, I was dying to take you, but I would never ask you to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.” He paused, thinking about his next words. “We’ve shared everything, Emmy. Everything from kindergarten to now has been experienced with you. Every field trip, every camping and hunting trip, even the skiing trip when I broke my leg. You stayed with me until our parents came and then you refused to leave when I had to stay the night in the hospital.” He chuckled at the memory. “We’ve always been together. Next is going to be graduation and then we’re off to new adventures. Even the same college. I want to do everything with you, Ember. That day will be here before we know it, so before that happens, I need to have this night with you.'' His eyes were laser focused on hers, and he swore he could see into the depths of her soul. “Please, Emmy, do this with me. Dance with me. I need this moment with you.”

* * *

Ember sat speechless. This was Eli. Her best friend. It was true; every moment she could recall had been with him. She realized she needed this moment with him as much as he needed it with her.

“Yes, Elijah. I’ll dance with you.”

That was all he needed before opening his door, making his way around the truck then opening her door, hand held out, to help her down.

They walked hand-in-hand to the barn, and Eli slid the heavy door open. Ember looked inside and saw that he must’ve set things up prior to coming inside the house. White twinkling Christmas lights hung haphazardly from the rafters as if strung in a hurry. A lantern sat on the ground between two hay bales. An ice cream pail filled with ice held a variety of children’s juice pouches, and a plate with grapes, strawberries and cheese with an assortment of chips sat on a paper plate under a covering of cellophane. A small radio, set to a country station, also sat on the same bale. Ember giggled at the makeshift prom setting.

“Had to compromise on a tight budget,” he said, reading her expression.

“I love it!” Not one false word left her lips.

He shrugged and led her over to a vacant hay bale.

“Would you care for some punch, m’lady?” Eli said, gesturing to the makeshift ice bucket, imitating a horrendous French accent.

“Why, thank you, kind sir. That’d be absolutely mav’ulos!” Ember used her strongest southern drawl, laying it on thick.

He pulled out a juice pouch and stabbed the straw through the silver foil packaging, and presented it to Ember over the length of his forearm like a maître d’. “Only the finest for you,” and they both laughed.

“I thought you had to work?” Ember questioned while taking a sip off the tiny straw.

“I did, but I have some pull with the boss.” He winked at her then punctured the straw into his own juice pouch.

“Really?” She pulled her head back, feigning surprise.

“Ends up, when you tell the boss you want to take his daughter to her own personal prom, he looks very favorably on you.” Eli reached over and uncovered the paper plate, “Hors d’oeuvre?” He offered the plate of sad appetizers.

Ember took a few grapes and popped them in her mouth. “So, you did this all yourself?” she asked, taking in the setting.

Well, I did get some help from your mom,” he said as he pointed to her dress. And, your dad took me to his tailor and hooked me up with this.” He pulled the lapel of his jacket. “He even taught me to tie a real bow tie. Said every man should tie his own; never use one of those pre-tied adjustable ones.”

“Well, you’re very dapper, Mr. Ryan.” Ember smiled while looking him over.

Eli grinned, then took Ember in once again, from head to toe. “You look absolutely beautiful tonight, Emmy. I mean, you're beautiful all the time, but tonight, you look,” he paused, “like the prettiest thing on earth.”

The moment hung between them, neither saying anything to break the splendor of the confession. Ember wasn’t sure how long they sat there staring at one another—could have been seconds, maybe hours—but Eli broke the moment when he stood and walked over to the radio, turned up the volume, and sent the speaker into the beginning guitar riffs of Brad Paisley’s “She’s Everything.” Turning, he held out his hand to Ember and asked, “Dance with me?”

She rose, wiping her backside free of stray hay and took his hand in hers. Eli pulled her into his body and she went willingly. He held her right hand in his left and his other hand wrapped around her waist, skimming her lower back, almost resting on the top of her lace panties beneath her dress. She was now grateful for the skimpy scrap of material, because she knew her everyday casual underwear would be granny-panties compared to the light lace, and he would’ve definitely felt those bloomers through the thin material of the dress.

She laid her head against his chest, hearing his heartbeat beneath her cheek. It was strong and beat out a rhythm that soothed her soul. Eli tipped his head and slowly inhaled, taking in the scent of her hair. It was all Ember. He wished he could bottle it and that way she would always be with him.

Slowly, they swayed to the song, Eli sang softly and every word of the song was felt in his heart. He wanted to tell her that every note of this song was for her and that she was his everything. She was everything to him.

The song drew down, but they stood still in each other's arms, caught in the depths of the other’s gaze. They were standing so close. Eli tucked a tendril of fiery red hair behind her ear, the escaped curls embodied an emblazoned halo around her head. He gently brushed his thumb over her cheek. Just grazing her skin, sending tingles over her body, and she felt the hair on her arms come to life. His hands cupped her face, gently, lightly, with a barely-there touch. Then, hesitantly, Eli leaned forward. Slowly. Intimately. Reverently.

Inhaling through her nose, Ember smelled a hint of the spiciness of his cologne and the scent that was all Eli. Her heart beat erratically and her breath shuddered in her lungs. Their lips parted, and slowly, their mouths met. Her top lip over his; his suckling her bottom. Slowly, tentatively, just a single kiss. Time came to a stop. The cosmos stood still.

They each pulled back, barely, with their lips slightly agape, but lingering close enough to feel each other's presence. Their lips brushed again and parted once more. Without hesitation, their tongues intertwined. Their lips molded and tongues danced. He deepened the kiss, pulling her into his soul, further into the depths he thought he’d never explore.

It was her first kiss. She’d waited for this and it was more than she ever could’ve imagined. The taste of his lips washed across her palate. There was no floor; there was no ceiling, just them. Two souls crashing together as if pulled by some force of nature, pushing them, ravishing them into the throws of passion. Ember felt herself shimmering in the afterglow of what neither of them expected, yet felt so natural. Inevitable.

What am I doing? Is this really happening? This is Eli. This. Is. Eli. I’m kissing Eli? OMG, this is weird. Eli’s like my brother. Am I kissing my brother? Oh, God! This needs to stop!

* * *

Hesitation ensued. Eli was waiting for her to recoil, but she stayed in his arms. This is what he waited for, what he’d imagined in his dreams. She gave as good as she got. He was kissing Emmy, his Red. He loved her. Down to the marrow of his bones, he knew Ember Hayes was his. His past. His present. His future. There was no turning back. Be it the gods, or fates, or karma or whatever spiritual pull was in the universe, he was kissing his forever!

Then Ember pulled back with such force, she almost lost her balance, surprising Eli.

“We can’t do this Elijah,” she said with heavy breaths, her hand going to her lips, feeling the swell of their kiss. She started to pace away from him, but he stopped her with a hand on her upper arm.

“Emmy, wait. Wha—”

“You're my friend Eli, my best friend. We can’t do this. I don’t feel that way about you.” Her words came out on heaving breaths.

Cold. Water.

Her words drenched his soul. Blanketing him, shivering to his core.

“I mean I love you, in a brotherly/sisterly way.” She tried to laugh off the moment, but it fell short. “I mean, come on, Eli. You're like my brother,” she paused for a moment oblivious to the destruction she was laying on him. “Like you said earlier, we’ve grown up together. We’ve known each other since kindergarten. We’re not,” she pointed back and forth between them, “this.”

So, there it was. The truth Eli didn’t want to face. The truth that Ember and Eli were just that.

Ember. And. Eli.

There would never be an us with them. He was relegated forever to the friend zone. A truth that tore his being. He internally steeled himself, not wanting to show his vulnerability, when in truth, he wanted to wail away at the cruelty of it all. Show how much her words were tearing his soul, the very soul that would always belong to her, though she would never claim possession of it.

Eli heard the nervous tremble in her laughter. Not wanting her to feel embarrassed, he joined in the denial, though each word was a dagger to his heart.

“No...No, yeah, you're right. I’m sorry about that.” He rubbed the back of his neck, one of his nervous ticks. “I...we, ah, yeah...we never should have done that.” He laughed a breathy laugh, hating himself with every word.

“Right? That’s just crazy.” Ember’s mood lightened, though the nervousness was still there. “Please, Elijah, tell me you don’t hate me.”

The shocking question took him by surprise. “Why would I hate you?” he asked, shaking his head in disagreement.

“I don’t know. I guess...I…um.”

He waited to hear her reasoning. What would make her think he could ever hate her?

“I guess, I don’t want you to be mad.”

His next words made him sick, but he had to give them to her, if anything, to get her off the hook of any guilt she was putting on herself. “Em, don’t worry. I’m not mad. It was a mistake. Guess we just got caught up in the moment. I mean,” he swallowed the bile creeping up with each word, “that kiss...it didn’t mean anything.”

He could physically see the relief come over her and her shoulders fell as she chuckled, getting the pent up nerves out. “Yeah, not like you haven’t kissed lots of girls before.”

It wasn’t a lie, he had kissed girls before, not a lot, but he had his fair share of girls he dated, but none even came close to the explosiveness of the kiss he shared with her. And, he knew none would ever come close to it again. The lies were killing him, but he would say them if it meant it would soothe her conscience.

“Yeah, lots of kisses. Like I said, just got caught up in the moment.” The constant rubbing of his neck quelled the shivers crawling up his spine. He hated himself for even venturing into the realm that was Ember Hayes. The dynamics were forever changed, and he knew that path to calling her his was never going to change. She didn’t see him in the same light. But, he vowed, Ember Hayes would own his heart until his dying day, until he breathed his last breath. He couldn’t live with her, so he would figure a way to live without her. Even if it killed him to set her free.

She let out the breath she was holding. “We’ll probably look back and laugh at this moment. It’ll be hilarious. One of the stupid moments of regret.” She laughed.

There would be regret all right. His regret. The regret that the only girl he loved, didn’t love him back.