Rainbow by K.L. Savage

Rainbow looks handsome in his Class-A uniform, a fancy uniform the firefighters wear for special occasions.

And this is one.

It’s been two weeks since the hurricane has passed, and we are no close to getting answers to what happened to the club during those twenty-four hours. It’s been quiet now. It’s like the murderer came and left with the storm. Everyone feels like they’re walking on eggshells and waiting for the next shoe to drop.

We never found Sherlock’s body. The rope snapped during the storm, and his body washed away. Puzzle’s funeral is later today, and we’re on our way to Taylor’s funeral now.

Firefighter Taylor died during the storm when the power went out. The hospital generators flooded, and Taylor could not breathe on his own, which led to his death.

It’s been a long two weeks, but the first forty-eight hours after the storm was the hardest. So many dead bodies. So many car accidents. So much pain and suffering. The city is still cleaning up, and it will be a while before Baton Rouge is back to normal.

I’m only here for another week or so before I head back to Vegas, and I don’t know how to bring that up with Rainbow. Things between us have been great, but the circumstances surrounding us have impacted our relationship. Rainbow has been so quiet, lost in his thoughts, and I’m not sure how to bring him out of it.

He feels guilty for Taylor’s death. No matter how many times I tell him it’s not his fault, he stews in the dangerous ‘what else could he have done’ thought pool.

Trying to pick a time to ask him about me going back to Vegas is impossible. There isn’t a good time. With everything going on and all the funerals we have to go to and the shifts we have to pick up, plus the clubhouse drama, the Vegas thing doesn’t seem to be appropriate to bring up.

I’m stuck in limbo trying to figure it out.

“You look very handsome,” I tell him as he pins the mourning badge to his uniform.

If there’s one thing to say about Rainbow, it’s that he’s a very decorated firefighter. He’s very good at his job and is recognized for his ability, which I think is outstanding, but I bet he believes he doesn’t deserve any of them. That’s just the kind of guy he is. He doesn’t believe how much good he really is capable of.

“Thanks, Sassafras.” He stares at himself in the mirror and hangs his head. “I don’t want to go.”

I wrap my arms around his waist and lay my cheek against his back. “I know. It’s been an exhausting two weeks, but things will get back to normal soon. It doesn’t feel like it because everything has changed, but we’ll get through it.”

“I don’t know what I’d do without you. Just by being here, you’ve made everything easier to handle.” He spins around in my arms, and his hands flatten on my ass, something he does every time he holds me. I used to find it silly, but now I find it comforting.

If he isn’t touching my butt, something is seriously wrong with his health. Even in his sleep, he keeps a palm on my tushy.

“I’m glad I’m here too. It would be a nightmare to go through this without you.”

He bends down, presses a kiss against my lips, and tilts my head back with his hands as he cups my jaw. “I hope you never have to go a day without me, Sassafras. I think a day without you would kill me.”

This is it. This is my segue.

“Ready?” Hound knocks on the wall and pops his head into our new room as the original room is currently under construction.

Rainbow and I agreed that we couldn’t be in there, knowing what happened. I wouldn’t have been able to take a bath in that tub ever again. So Rainbow is gutting it and renovating it, which isn’t a problem since a third of the clubhouse got destroyed.

“Ready,” Rainbow replies, tucking his wallet in his pocket.

Damn it. I’m never going to be able to talk to him. Before I know it, I’ll be packing my bags because I didn’t get the nerve to say what I needed to.

“Coming, baby? You aren’t going to leave me alone, are you?” He gives me a lopsided smile, the best one he can muster, and a hint of his beautiful straight teeth show.

Even on his saddest day, he’s the most handsome man I’ve ever seen.

And seeing him when I feel at my worst still makes me happy. Even when happiness shouldn’t have a place here, given the circumstances. He holds out his hand, and I slip my fingers through his. There’s a sea of black in the living room, and every biker is dressed in their best.

I hate why they’re dressed up, but holy hotness, every single one of them looks like a model. They all wear a black shirt of some sort paired with their cut, tucked into pairs of either dress pants or black jeans.

The only one missing is Cosmo. He hasn’t left his room or told us who assaulted him. Flatline, the Club’s doctor, came back last week, and he’s been treating Cosmo. Physically, he’ll heal.

Mentally, it’ll be a long road.

Hound is dressed in his uniform too. Fox is standing next to him, and his shoulder is still in a sling as he waits for the bullet wound to heal.

“Everyone ready?”

“Yeah, Prez. We’re going to the station, so we’ll see you guys a bit later,” Rainbow explains, guiding me out the door with Hound.

Rainbow and Hound pause on the steps and the sun shines perfectly between them. The silhouettes of their bodies are the only shape I can see. I take out my phone and snap a quick picture of the two of them. They bask in the warmth of the sun and Hound is the first one to trudge down the rotted steps.

They have to be replaced because of water damage.

Mime is in the driver’s seat of the truck waiting on us. The tarp covering the broken window whips in the air, and I jump, startled. I’m still so paranoid that somebody could be behind me. I whip my head around, scanning everywhere, but there’s nothing. The branch logs that shattered the glass are piled neatly next to the door for summer night bonfires. That’s what Jokester said.

I only hope I’m here for them.

“Ready?” I ask Rainbow. “We’re going to be late if we don’t leave now.”

“Yeah, I guess.” He throws an arm around me and walks down the creaking steps. Water squishes out from under the grass as our feet hit the ground. It’s still drenched, and it’s going to take forever to dry up.

Rainbow opens the truck door for me, then picks me up since I can’t climb into the seat myself. I’d be embarrassed if it weren’t for Rainbow loving the fact that he gets to throw me around. We get buckled up, and Rainbow holds onto my hand so tight his knuckles are white.

Mime pulls out of the muddy driveway. There’s still debris everywhere. Fallen branches and scattered leaves. There are a few puddles of water gathered where there were natural dips or holes in the woods.

We pass a group of men tossing ruined furniture on the side of the road. Rainbow tenses and that’s when I notice Dex. He’s the oldest and tallest of the bunch. He doesn’t seem to notice us, but we’re the only ones that live on this road, so he has to know.

“Remind me to give him that recording his father left. I keep forgetting. He deserves to have it,” Rainbow’s voice fills the cab, and it sounds deeper since it’s so quiet.

“No problem.” I lean my head against his shoulder, and the rest of the ride to Station 11 is quiet. When we get there, the fire trucks are out of the bay, with ladders up and American flags blowing in the wind. Rainbow blows out a breath.

“Goddamn it, I can’t do this,” he says. “He didn’t deserve to die like this.”

“No one does.” I press my hand in the middle of his back and rub large circles over the wide width to try to calm him.

When Rainbow sees the fellow Station 11 crew, he opens the back door. I don’t expect him to pay me any attention during a time like this. I don’t know if his friends know he’s with a man, so I’ve already given myself a pep-talk. I’m prepared since this isn’t about me or us. This is about saying goodbye to his friend.

Hound steps out of the truck next. I’m about to jump to the ground from this dangerous height. Thankfully, I’m surrounded by medics if I fall on my face.

“Here, baby.” He grabs the space under my arms and lifts me with ease, gently placing me on my feet as always. “I feel sick. I hate having to come to these.” He takes my hand and leads me toward his crew. We’ve been back at work, but I’m not sure if he outed us or not. When we work, it’s professional.

Always.

I mean, I hope that changes, but I won’t push it.

“Saint,” Rainbow shakes his fellow firefighter’s hand. “How are you holding up?”

“Taylor was my best friend.” Saint doesn’t answer the question exactly, but what he says implies how he’s doing.

“I tried—”

“—Don’t for one-second blame yourself. You saved us. His plans were different from mine in the end. There are no hard feelings, brother.” Saint gives him a quick hug and the rest of the guys come out, all dressed in their Class A uniforms.

Baldwin, Kincaid, Lock, and Captain Warwick greet us next.

“I want to apologize. Maybe if I hadn’t fought you on getting out of there, he would have lived,” Baldwin says.

“You were following orders, and I don’t think he would have,” Rainbow grimaces as the truth leaves his mouth. “As Saint said, there’s no hard feelings.”

“How are you doing, Hathaway?” Saint asks me.

“I’m good. I wish I could have known Taylor better.”

Saint begins to laugh. “He called you a chihuahua that bites.”

“Well, he wasn’t wrong.” I lift a shoulder, and all the guys laugh until it lulls into a slow, sad stop.

“Ready boys? The hearse is three minutes out.” Captain Warwick begins to walk to the edge of the road where cops and firefighters are lined up to show their respect.

Their lights are on, but the sirens are off.

“I’m happy for the two of you if you were worried about telling us. Taylor would have cheered you on,” Kincaid states.

“I didn’t feel the need to hide it or announce it. I just figured if you guys didn’t like what you saw that was your problem.” Rainbow sounds curt, and his hand drops to my lower back. “And keep your eyes to yourself, Kincaid.” Possessive Rainbow.

Me likey.

“Anyway, it’s all good. We don’t care.” Saint claps Rainbow’s shoulder. “Baldwin, is the intercom on?”

“Yeah, everyone will be able to hear it.”

“Come on. Let’s stand next to our engine.” Rainbow’s fingers clutch my hips, and I don’t miss the way he mean-mugs Kincaid.

“Stop glaring,” I whisper.

“He was looking at your ass.” The deep, pissed off and protective rumble coming from his chest has my heart frolicking down Being in Love Lane—and plot twist, there’s a dead-end with no way out.

I giggle, wanting to say that's more than what I have in store, but time and place.

And now is not the time nor the place.

We stand on the side of the road, and my breath catches in the middle of my throat when I look down the road and see regular people lined up on the streets. Hundreds of police cars and fire trucks are parked on the side of the road, blue and red lights on. It’s hard not to get emotional.

The love here today can be felt, but who we lost will be felt forever.

The hearse turns onto the street, and the big men next to me stand straighter and salute. Saint has a tear dripping down his face as the last call for Firefighter Evan Taylor sounds.

Dispatch sounds on the radio, which are amplified in the speakers on either side of the station.

“Firefighter Taylor,” Dispatch calls for him.

But he doesn’t answer.

“Firefighter Taylor.” Dispatch tries again while the familiar melody of “Amazing Grace” comes from a bagpipe somewhere in the distance.

“Having heard no response from Firefighter Evan Taylor, he has responded and served his last call on this earth and for Station 11. Firefighter Evan Taylor protected and served the citizens of Baton Rouge for five years. His dedication, honor, and sacrifice will always be remembered as a Firefighter.”

The hearse drives by slowly, and I see the American flag draped over the casket through the window.

“Firefighter Evan Taylor is a Guardian now and watching over his fellow Firefighters.”

The first car drives by, and in the passenger’s seat, I see a man who resembles Taylor. His window is down so he can hear the last call, and his cheeks are wet from crying, mourning over his sibling.

“Firefighter Evan Taylor has completed his tour as a Firefighter. This is the Last Call for Firefighter Evan Taylor. May he rest in peace and be safe until we meet again,” Dispatch ends the call, and static crackles the speakers.

No matter how amazing the support is, no matter how beautiful the show of love is, I hope to never have to come to one of these again.

Rainbow has become my breath, and the last call would take that from me.

I’d suffocate until he breathed into me again.