Commitment Issues by Ali Ryecart

Chapter Forty-Five

Freddie

We make our way upstairs to my bedroom. I feel oddly shy, not because Elliot is going to be sleeping with me in my parents’ house, but because in the space of a few hours our world has shifted.

I close the door but don’t switch on the light. The room’s hot, the air thick with electricity, but that’s not just because of the coming storm. Outside the thunder’s rumbling all around us, but a crash, loud, sudden and shattering, seems to shake the room, lighting it up for a split second, and in that moment we’re on each other.

“I want you so fucking much,” Elliot growls at me, shoving me against the door. I answer him with a hard kiss and a harder cock. He groans into my mouth, the vibration heating my body to fever pitch. “I need to be inside you, sweetheart.”

“Bed,” I rasp, but he laughs, low and gravelly, and Jesus but I could come here and now.

“Oh no, here, up against the door.”

My heart hammers in my chest and my ragged breath hitches, as above us the storm rages, unleashing its power as something is unleashed in us.

“In—in the drawer, I’ve got—”

“Get them now,” he commands.

I yank open the drawer with so much force I almost pull the whole thing over.

Scrambling for the condom and lube, my hands are fumbling and clumsy, but I find them and swing around. He’s already naked, the flashes of lightning illuminating his body. My breath catches in my throat, and I can’t move an inch because all I can do is watch as he runs his tunnelled fist up and down his hard length, his other hand massaging his balls.

“Strip. Now. I’m going to open you up, Freddie, and then I’m going to fuck you so hard you’ll see stars.”

I nod hard and fast, and do exactly what he tells me.

Elliot pops the top off the tube, and smothers his fingers before pulling me in close, one arm encircling my waist as with the other he finds my hole. Against my burning skin, the gel’s cold and I flinch.

“Shush,” he whispers against my ear. “I won’t hurt you, Freddie, you know that.”

And I believe him. He’s not just talking about now, this moment and what those slicked-up fingers represent, he’s talking about us and who we are now, and who we’ll be tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that. I nod, and he kisses my brow, because he knows I’ve understood.

He urges my legs open and I gasp as his insistent finger breaches the tight muscle between my arse cheeks.

“You okay?” His fingers still.

“I’m more than okay.”

He resumes his gentle, insistent movement and I’m breathing hard as I lean into his body, knowing he’s got me, loosening my muscle as he loosens my mind.

Two, then three fingers, and as he finds and strokes at my gland every one of my nerves explode and I push my face into his neck to muffle my desperate wail. My legs tremble, my knees buckle, but his arm’s strong around my waist and it tightens, holding me up and taking my weight. He chuckles, dark and deep, and I need him more than I need breath in my lungs.

“Now. Now Elliot, I need you fucking now.” His fingers slip from me, the warmth and pressure gone and I mourn their loss, but the ripping of foil and the snap of the condom tells me the time for mourning is over.

Elliot edges me towards the door, pressing me against the cool wood. Cupping my face between his palms, he kisses me long and deep. His cock nudges mine, both of us full and hard against our bellies, and I drift a hand down to wrap my palm around the two of us.

He slaps my hand away, and there it is again, that low, dark chuckle that makes my heart stutter. “No sweetheart. No touching, not yet. I said I was going to fuck you against this door, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

He knocks my legs wide apart and stands between them, lining himself up to push, nudging at my entrance with so much more than his fingers.

“Ready?” he murmurs, and I grunt my response as I jerk my thighs upwards. Elliot catches me, supporting my weight with his strong arms as I wrap my legs around his waist and anchor my body. My arse cheeks are spread wide and the tip of his cock brushes at my hole in a delicious, agonising tease.

His body’s pressed hard against mine, crushing me into the door, crushing me almost through it. Our bodies are hot and slick with sweat and I gasp as I feel myself slipping, but he’s got me, just as he said, just as I know he always will. Elliot loosens his grip, just a little, guiding my body lower, everything controlled. I moan as his cockhead breaches my muscle, and every part of me trembles in his arms.

“Freddie, Freddie, Freddie,” he murmurs in my ear, his voice centring me as I take more of him, as he fills me fully and completely.

A low rumble of thunder, a flash of brightness, and what I see in that split second is seared on my soul. He’s looking at me, not with hunger and lust but with a kind of wonder. There’s want in that face, and heat and desire, but there’s something more and my stumbling, stuttering heart knows what it is.

Love.

Outside, the world’s gone still, and we’re still with it. I lay a palm against his cheek feeling the rough beginnings of stubble.

“I love you Elliot, I think I always have.”

“Ah, sweetheart.”

There’s a smile in his voice, and I want to tell him, over and over again, how much I love him.

“I—,” but my words are swallowed up in a crash of thunder that seems to shake our very souls, as the room fills with shuddering light as, above us, the storm rages and rips the North Sea sky. The time for tenderness and sweet thoughts is over as he thrusts up inside me, filling my body with a heat that burns me from the inside out.

“Ah, Jesus.”

His hips piston into me and there’s nothing I can do but take him.

Every thrust, every grind of his hips, pushing deeper and deeper into my body, his cock filling me up as my heart thunders hard, my breath coming in rapid short bursts. Our bodies burn, slick sweat drenching our flesh, as he pounds into me. The door’s banging hard in its ill-fitting frame, the thumping hard and rhythmic like our gasping, desperate, ragged breaths.

“Oh sweetheart, oh Christ…” His face presses into the space between my neck and shoulder, and he’s muttering and grinding out incomprehensible words, and all I can do is cry out for more and more and more.

The storm’s above us now, right above, and a huge thunderclap and bolt of lightening crash in unison, lighting up the room, illuminating Elliot. His eyes are wide in wonder, and he cries out as his hips stutter and stumble, before stilling suddenly, as all the world around us suddenly stops. Buried deep inside me, I feel his pulse and heat as he empties himself into the condom, rushing my own climax from me as my balls tighten and tingle, and hot cum bursts from me.

Above us the storm’s passing. The howling wind’s dropped, and the rumble of thunder is now just an echo. Soon, all will be calm and quiet.

Elliot’s breathing hard, and I feel his heart beating next to mine. My exhausted leg muscles slacken, and I slip down from his waist as he pulls out of me, leaving me for a moment as he deals with the condom. My body’s shaking and my legs are spaghetti, and I’m about to sink into a boneless heap on the floor, but he catches me and swings me up into his arms, carrying me to the bed like I’m the most treasured possession he’s ever had.

“Storm’s past,” he says, slipping in beside me.

It has, in more ways than one. I snuggle into him and he envelops me in his arms. Resting my head against his chest, I hear the rapid beating of his heart, matching mine every thud of the way. He plays with my hair, carding his fingers through it, and sighs.

“Freddie,” he says. “Freddie, Freddie, Freddie.”

And I smile. I don’t answer because I don’t need to. My eyes fall to a close, and I drift off to sleep safe in his arms, as over and over he repeats my name as though it’s something wonderful and precious.