Psync by Zile Elliven
Chapter Twenty-Five
Haruka
Haruka was supposed to be paying attention in class. He was supposed to be taking notes and listening to the lecture on what to expect on their midterm, but his attention kept straying to the bewitching creature sent into his life with the sole purpose of torturing him to death.
It had taken every ounce of self-control Haruka possessed this morning to allow Eli to leave his bed unscathed.
The image of Eli’s slim hips, barely covered in his sleep shorts haunted him. Thinking about the little cat tail wrapped around the curve Haruka had been pressed against this morning had been all it had taken to get off when he’d jerked off in the shower—for the second time in less than twelve hours.
He was torn between the urge to burn those shorts and the desire to enshrine them.
Haruka wasn’t used to wanting like this. All his life, he’d been given anything he wanted. Anyone he desired, Haruka could have. He’d lost count of the number of men and women who had propositioned him over the years.
None of them stirred him like the boy sitting next to him, chewing on the end of a pencil like his life depended on it.
His lips were swollen from the constant abuse Eli put them through, and they glistened in the morning light. Did he put something on them to make them look that way? Knowing how much the boy hated drawing attention to himself, Haruka doubted it. He was just naturally beguiling.
Haruka had walked Eli to his first class that morning—he couldn’t have stopped himself if he’d tried—and he had personally pulled Eli’s hood up before he’d left him at his desk. The boy’s large Bambi eyes had nearly done him in, but Haruka had somehow managed to drag himself away and leave the classroom.
He was fortunate Eli’s class was half an hour longer than Haruka’s, so he could be back to wait for him.
Haruka scrubbed his hands over his face and suppressed the urge to hit his desk. If he could, he would keep Eli in his room where no one could see him or hurt him. Or steal him.
Not for the first time, Haruka was glad the boy had a tendency to hide himself in loose clothes. Not that it made much of a difference. There was something about him, some ineffable quality that shined through anything Eli wore, something that announced to everyone that he was special, someone worth knowing more about.
And Haruka wanted to know everything. His favorite food, his favorite movie, his favorite hoodie—everything. Anything that could help Haruka capture and keep the boy’s attention all to himself.
He was such a selfish creature, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.
Eli was his. The boy just hadn’t realized it yet. And if Haruka wasn’t patient, he would scare him into running away again and leave Haruka with a hole in his chest that made the first one look like a pinhole.
For Eli, he would wait as long as it took for the boy to want him back. Even a fraction of how Haruka felt would be enough. As long as he knew he was Haruka’s and Haruka was his, everything would be okay.
This morning had been a good sign. Eli hadn’t run back to his own room after spending forever in the bathroom, like Haruka had half-expected. Instead, he’d stayed and continued to alternate between clinging to Haruka and pulling away like he had the day before. He’d even eaten most of the food Haruka had bought him for breakfast. Maybe someday soon, Eli would let him feed him personally.
And now he was staring at Eli’s mouth again.
“Are you ready to go?” Eli asked, tilting his head to the side adorably. He was like the sun, brilliant, blinding, and something Haruka couldn’t take his eyes off to save his life.
He nodded and closed his notebook on the empty page in front of him. He trailed after Eli, unable to do anything else.
When the boy’s phone chimed, Haruka wanted to ask who messaged him. Who it was that brought the soft smile to Eli’s lips. But he knew better than to act like a caveman. If he was lucky, he would find out on his own. Patience was the key with Eli.
“Alice wants to have coffee with us. Do you think she’ll notice the bruise on my face?”
Haruka scowled at the reminder of what Ash had done to Eli. He’d never been as close to killing someone as he had that night. His aunt would have changed her mind about not wanting to recruit he for the shady side of his family’s business if she’d seen him in that moment.
“You don’t want to?” Eli’s hood slipped back off his face.
“No, it’s fine.” Haruka pulled Eli’s hood back up, covering the livid bruise. It had transformed into a truly impressive array of green and blue. “If you keep this on, she won’t notice anything.”
And it will be easier to stop myself from hunting down the person who gave it to you.
“The police said he’s being held without bail for the time being. So, we don’t have to worry about seeing him yet.” Eli answered Haruka’s unspoken thought—seemingly unaware he hadn’t actually said anything out loud.
Damn it. Haruka had been working hard to keep from spilling over into Eli’s mind. He used the space of no-mind he’d learned to slip into while practicing archery, but apparently, he still needed to work on it. Hearing Eli’s thoughts could only help Haruka, but hearing Haruka’s thoughts would only damage Eli.
It was better for Eli not to know too much about the predator he had at his side. Especially since he seemed unaware of the reality of situation he was in.
Haruka had never known exactly what his soul had been searching for all these years, but he had known one thing. That once he found it, he would never let it go. And after knowing first-hand what losing Eli would feel like, Haruka was willing to do anything it took to make sure it didn’t happen again.
Eli felt something for him, Haruka was sure of it. The problem was, he had no idea what those feelings were. And there was the issue of Eli’s roommate Jace. Haruka could ask him point blank if there was anything going on between them, but he was afraid the skittish boy would run if he did.
Instead, he’d chosen to wait and see if Eli’s thoughts would shed light on the subject. It was tricky, though. Eli’s mind was a fascinating puzzle Haruka hadn’t even begun to understand. He was an odd mix of self-deprecation, optimism, and oblivious innocence.
Every bit of his mind worked overtime to weave a complex tapestry of protection around the gaping wound of his kidnapping—something Haruka only discovered by accident. It had been a nothing more than a faint whisper on the edges of Haruka’s mind, but when he’d heard it, Haruka knew it was the source of Eli’s nightmares.
They reached a large maple tree by the pond, and Haruka sat at the base of the tree, content to be left with his thoughts.
Haruka observed quietly as Eli interacted with his friends. Both Alice and Nate worked to entertain and distract Eli, but it didn’t escape his notice that they each took turns asking subtle questions, trying to figure out the nature of Eli’s relationship with Haruka.
“Eli, when we’re done eating, can we go back to your room? I want to borrow the copy of the Escaflowne OVA you found last week.” Alice smiled sweetly, but her eyes darted to Haruka.
He didn’t know what she was trying to do, but if she wormed her way into Eli’s room, it would be obvious he didn’t live there anymore. Haruka had done his best to make sure Eli had no reason to go back to his room when packing the boy’s things.
“Um . . .” The bridge of Eli’s nose began to turn a charming shade of pink.
“I just borrowed it. When I’m finished, I can give it to you,” Haruka said. It was the first words he’d spoken beyond a simple greeting.
The reason for the subtle questioning—that none of them were talking about—was due to the fact that shortly after everyone sat down on the grass, Eli began scooting over to Haruka. When he propped his head on Haruka’s thigh, both Alice and Nate’s eyebrows shot toward the sky.
Haruka had motioned for them not to say anything. It was better to just let the boy do his thing. He’d had a hard week after all.
And he was in a good mood right now.
Haruka could feel it like a sweet song, threading through every aspect of his mind. Every now and then, he would catch snatches of Eli’s thoughts.
Right now, he was wondering if he picked where they ate tonight, if he could get away with not being overstuffed like a turkey.
Haruka smiled. Eli could pick where they ate every night, but Haruka would continue to push food at him until he stopped looking like a strong wind could steal him away.
He closed his eyes and leaned his head against the tree propping up his back and let the sounds of the campus, and the chatter of Eli and his friends wash over him.
This was good.
✽✽✽
“I should have made you carry me back here. I think I’m going to explode.” Eli leaned against the doorframe heavily while Haruka unlocked their door.
“Do you want me to carry you inside?”
“I think I can manage a few more feet.”
“Suit yourself.” Haruka pushed the door open and motioned for Eli to enter first.
The boy toed off his shoes, stumbled over to the bed, and dropped himself on it like a bag of rice, landing face down, groaning.
Okay, maybe Haruka had fed him a little too much.
Eli sat up and began to unzip his hoodie. “I think I’m going straight to bed.”
Haruka nodded and peeled off his shirt.
“W-what are you doing?”
“Going to bed,” Haruka said simply then went into the bathroom to brush his teeth.
When he came out, Eli stood outside with a small bundle of clothes hugged to his chest and darted past him, closing the door firmly behind.
Haruka changed into a pair of sweatpants and climbed into bed, making sure to leave room for Eli.
Then he waited.
And waited.
He took out his phone and scrolled through YouTube videos until Eli finally emerged, wearing an oversized gray T-shirt and black pajama pants with the Batman logo down one side. His eyes were large and uncertain.
“There’s only one bed.”
Haruka nodded and put his phone away. “Just like last night, and the night before.”
He’d been expecting this. In fact, when Haruka had been helping Eli pack, he’d fully intended to go out afterward and buy another bed. A plan he’d immediately scrapped when Eli told him to leave his comforter behind because Haruka already had one.
“Right.”
Haruka watched as Eli visibly steeled himself to climb into bed. Halfway there, he stooped to pick up a long throw pillow from the floor, crawled under the covers, and wedged the pillow between them, glaring at Haruka as if daring him to say anything.
Haruka put his hands up and bit back a smile. The he turned out the light and settled back, preparing himself for a long, sleepless night of lying next to someone he craved but couldn’t have.
Ten minutes later, the pillow shifted and rolled onto Haruka’s stomach and a small, warm bundle of sleeping Eli pressed against his side. The boy’s arm went over his chest and knocked the pillow onto the floor. Haruka pressed his nose into wavy black hair and breathed in Eli’s scent.
This.
If he could have nothing more, this would be enough.