Revealing the Monster by Amelia Hutchins
Chapter Twenty
Some men needed a high-five in the face with a frying pan. Lucian was one of those men. ~Lena
Magdalena
Days went by, and Lucian still hadn’t released me from the bedroom. I’d spent this time stewing, watching him return from overseeing the club, only to be fucked senseless. Luckily, it usually ended with both of us exhausted, which left little time for fighting.
I wasn’t stupid. I knew what he was doing to me. Lucian was trying to keep me sated and tired while he was within the room, drained to nothing more than a boneless heap of blissfulness when he left it.
Today the melancholy was reaching a toxic level, and everything around me was muted. I’d been stuck inside my head since the moment Lucian had left the room. My mind raced, knowing what he’d done. Had he murdered my family himself? No. But he hadn’t prevented it from occurring, and he’d known it would happen. He’d chosen to do nothing, nor would he explain why he’d stood by and allowed demons to slaughter my coven and family.
I’d sacrificed my life for my family, too. I’d known that they would wind up caught between Katarina, Lucifer, and Lucian’s quarrel if I didn’t end the game. It was basic math, and even though I hated and had failed math, I’d done the simple addition in my head. If the situation hadn’t been addressed and completed, there would have been collateral damage that neither side would have minded. They didn’t care who was harmed in their fight or who suffered because of them. I did, which had ended badly for me.
I’d protected Lucian, but I’d also safeguarded my bloodline, which was everything to witches. We were taught that our lineage should be protected at all costs, even if it meant ending our own life to save others. It was why the witches clung to the Awakening in the first place. Life should have been simple. I ought to have taken Lucian’s advice, ran away, made pretty babies, and lived a mundane life as a human. I hadn’t, and now I was trapped in his bedroom, held prisoner with the Devil chasing me.
Instead, I’d slept with Lucifer, unknowingly, of course, but it still happened. I was in love with a man that wasn’t even human and what I’d thought impossible to be real. I still hadn’t been able to wrap my mind around that shit.
I’d created life and fallen in love with the idea of being a mother, knowing that it wouldn’t ever happen for me. I’d made one choice as Harbinger’s mom. And that had been to prevent him from suffering or becoming something that his father would have had to put down. I’d discovered my brother was alive, and he’d chosen to remain away from Lucian. Unlike the others of my kind, I couldn’t do that.
I was being held captive by the man I loved, the same prick repeatedly making choices for me. Lucian didn’t ask me or even consider that I may want something else. He continued to do what he thought was best, and those decisions were huge and held life and death matters. He’d protected the coven for me, knowing all along what he was going to do. So why do it at all?
It didn’t make sense, which made my brain itch and my heart ache.
Then there was Lucifer.
The bastard, who had brutally used my sister, impregnated her with a Nephilim and then stole her while Kendra lay bleeding out. Now, he seemed the perfect father. He actually seemed to care about Makenna, and he’d kept the name Kendra had chosen for her. Lucian assumed it was all an act, but I didn’t think it was.
Nothing made sense anymore.
Fucking monsters!
Tears filled my eyes, slowly running down my cheeks as a soft sob of frustration and confusion flittered through me. I wanted to scream and beg Lucian to explain his actions and why he’d done what he had to me. I needed to understand his choices because I was helplessly in love with him, and I wasn’t certain we’d make it through this if he’d just stepped aside, choosing to allow my family to be murdered.
I felt the weightlessness before my head spun. My eyes blinked, and a shudder rushed down my spine as I peered around at white marble walls that sparkled like diamonds. Huge pillars sat inside the room, with silver mineral veins running through them. Radiohead’s Creep played through speakers low but soothingly. I shivered again, dragging my gaze to the shadows where Lucifer stood.
He watched me through dark, indigo-colored eyes. He was shirtless, with messy hair that looked as if he’d spent hours pushing his fingers through it. He exhaled but didn’t make a move to clear the distance to where I had appeared on the altar. His stare was pensive, as if he regretted something. Luc scanned down my body, his eyes heating at the small, thin gown I wore, which left a lot more flesh exposed than should be in his presence. His gaze rolled back up to my face, a frown tugging on his full, sensual mouth.
If lust had an image, then Luc’s father had dipped him into the jar, sprinkled him in sin, and unleashed him out on womankind everywhere. Everything about him was created perfectly, right down to the stubborn set of his strong jawline and washboard abs that slid to a seductive, pronounced V-line, vanishing into his pants.
“You’re so gorgeous, Magdalena,” he whispered huskily, pushing off of the wall to walk toward the altar.
“I wasn’t dreaming this time, Luc,” I replied, uncertain how he’d pulled me to him without my consciousness being lowered. I usually had to be drifting into stasis or deep within it for him to yank me to him.
“No, you weren’t. You were crying, and I couldn’t stand the salt of your tears. I shouldn’t have told you what Lucian did. I find it difficult to taste your pain lately. Normally, I enjoy it and creating tension between you and him, but not this time.”
“You’re the Devil,” I pointed out, as he stopped in front of me, smirking.
“So I am,” he agreed. “That doesn’t mean that I don’t have emotions or a heart, Lena.”
“Is that what this is about? You’re upset because I called you out for not having a heart?” I asked, searching his face. He looked—ashamed, and my heart thudded against my ribs. I slid my eyes back to his, holding the indigo orbs that peered through me as if he sensed more than I showed him.
“Admittedly, I wanted to hurt you because you drew blood first. If you’d been anyone else, you’d be nailed to my wall, being torn apart for my entire court of villains to see as a warning.”
“Why not just keep Kendra alive, Luc? She was literally another version of me,” I grunted, watching him.
“You’re wrong. I didn’t start out hurting your sister. I tried to court her, but she only saw what everyone else sees when they look at me.”
“And what is that?”
“A monster,” he whispered, allowing his skeletal wings to unfurl from his back. His eyes slowly began to glow, turning the color of silver obsidian. Thick black tattoos that started at his fingertips slipped in whirls along his wrist, crawling up his shoulders and down his shirtless sides. Power hummed around us, and I fought to hide the rush of pleasure I felt at looking at his perfectly dark, sinful form.
Lifting my hands, I touched the pulsing glyphs that held tiny barbs on them. I didn’t pull away or make a sound as one pricked my finger, drawing blood. He hissed at my touch, studying the way I slowly examined him with my fingertips. His skin was hot. But then everything about the Devil and his palace was hotter than any other locale I’d visited.
“You’re nothing like Kendra was, Lena. You don’t see a monster when you look at me. What I can give you or promise you isn’t the first thing that slips from your tongue. You don’t want anything from me, and you’re not afraid of me. There’s a realness to you that your sister didn’t have. You’re pure and unafraid of me and what I truly am. You don’t care that I am the Devil and could give you anything you ever wanted with the snap of my fingers.”
“What did Kendra ask of you?” I pried, lifting my eyes to meet his piercing stare.
“She wished for power and magic. I asked if she would willingly pay the price for such a request. My offer was to end the life of Kendra Fitzgerald. She told me she was Kendra, which is how I found you, Lena. I then asked her for your life, and she refused me. She denied the Devil for you.”
“And you raped her for it?”
“I didn’t rape Kendra. Inside the abbey, that was an illusion for Lucian. I wanted him to think I had because it was part of the plan to make him lose his mind. I thought he loved you or her, rather. I believed I had misread his feelings, but I wasn’t wrong after all. I just had the wrong twin, and he knew it. Kendra, though, I asked her to be with me and formally courted her. She was easy to charm, and I enjoyed her in my bed. In fact, we spent an entire week there creating our daughter, Makenna. The thing was, Kendra tried to abort our child, and for that, I gave her to my men. She told me I’d planted a monster inside of her, and maybe I had. But she’s such a beautiful little monster, Lena. I was grateful that Kendra grew to love our daughter before she died. I suspected her feelings, but they were confirmed when she asked you to protect and watch over Makenna.”
“What is it you think you’re going to get from me?” I countered, unwilling to discuss Kendra anymore with the man that had allowed her to die.
“Who says I want anything?”
“Your eyes do,” I stated, cupping his cheeks while searching his gaze. His hands lifted, covering mine, while he closed his eyes briefly. “What do you want, Luc?”
“Can’t I just be a man, and you a woman?”
“No, it could never be so simple, Luc. You’re the Devil, and I am something—else.”
He exhaled, leaning closer as a smile played on his lips. “Do you know why my father kicked me out of Heaven? The real reason? Not the version I made up or created to make him into a sinner.”
I licked my lips, shivering at the heat his body sent pulsing against my form through the skimpy gown. His eyes lowered to the action, slowly lifting back to mine while he pressed against me, kissing my cheek.
“I don’t know the truth, Luc. I know you tried to say he’d slept with the Devil, but you’re the Devil.”
“No, he was too pure and saintly for that. It was a terrific rumor to make people think he wasn’t as good as he pretended to be.” His eyes grew distant, as if remembering the past. He shook his head, leaning back to peer at me through a guarded expression.
“Was he Adam?”
“No,” he laughed, a sparkle of mischief dancing in his gaze. “Adam and Eve wouldn’t have ever created life had he been Adam. My father wouldn’t dare soil her garden or taint his persona in the eyes of those for which he cared. No, but I was in the garden.”
“You were the serpent,” I stated, but he shook his head.
“No, I wasn’t the serpent. My mother, Lilith, was the serpent inside the garden. I was blamed for it, but I was only watching Adam and Eve. I wanted to know what was so special about humans. My father preferred them over us, and I needed to understand why. So I’d snuck into the garden, which was off-limits to our kind. It was forbidden to speak to or interact with them, but I needed to see for myself what he saw in his humans that would make them superior to us.”
“Emotions?” I guessed, watching his lips jerk up in the corners before his tongue slipped over the bottom lip, pinching it between his teeth as he laughed.
“It was more than just emotions. That was part of it, though. Humans were strange creatures to us. Even the gods were curious about them and why my father had taken such an interest in them. Nyx was among those who noticed, hence me adding her into the mythos about Adam and Eve. My mother, Lilith, also wanted to know what my father found so perfect about his humans. It turns out that he liked them for all the reasons he punished us. They could not ignore sin and had flaws.” He ran his thumb over his bottom lip, tilting his head while watching me.
“I snuck into that garden, wanting to understand what drew my father to them. Instead, I studied them from the shadows as Lilith whispered temptation into their ears. Adam tasted Eve’s lips, and I wanted to be him. I watched Adam lay her down in that orchard and push his cock into her body. I wanted to feel her around me. He loved Eve, and I wished for her to love me, too. These were my father’s favorite creatures, and yet they were breaking all his rules. I thought my father had tested them, and they failed that test.”
“You watched Adam and Eve?” I asked, scrunching up my nose as he smiled wickedly. It was amazing to hear about them and to know that he’d been inside the Garden of Eden. It may have seemed perverted to others, but who else could say they were getting the actual story from the Devil himself?
“Adam and Eve were the first creatures to fuck in that way. Or, they were the first ones in our world. Angels didn’t get that right or feel anything because it was forbidden. Of course, I watched Adam grunting over Eve’s sweat-covered body. I smelled her arousal, and saw it on her naked pussy too, and whispered it into the wind that he should taste her there. He did, and he made it sound as if she was the rarest delicacy when his tongue ran through her pink petals. I wanted to become him and taste her cunt for myself, but I was still holding on to the fact that she was the forbidden fruit, and the apple wasn’t.”
“That’s disturbing,” I snorted, and his tongue jutted out, tracing over his lips while he held my stare captive. He moaned, smirking darkly as his gaze grew hooded.
“I bet you still taste like heaven. The flavor of your pussy is still on my lips, Lena. You came so hard for me, dripping down my chin while you fucked my mouth. You made the most erotic sounds for me.”
“Did I? I don’t recall,” I snorted, glaring at him while he chuckled.
“I’ll never forget how you tasted or the noises you made.”
“Focus on your story, or send me back, Lucifer.”
His eyes lowered to my gown, and his nostrils flared before he laughed soundlessly. “I was curious, but then who wouldn’t be? It was the first time a man had lain between a woman’s thighs, and she was fucking hot. Eve was perfect, created in the image of how my father thought women should look. So I remained in the shadows, observing as Adam pumped his cock into Eve’s tight opening. I saw the look of such utter pleasure in his eyes, and I wanted to feel that desire, too, and what it felt like to be within a woman. To feel something so fucking pleasurable that it sparkled from Adam’s eyes and made him scream maddeningly as he continued pummeling her delicate flesh,” he paused, lowering his stare to my body with need boiling in his gaze.
“But that wasn’t all I wished for, sweet girl. They were in love. It shone from them like a light that couldn’t be snuffed out. Eve watched Adam as if he was an extension of her being. It was as if they were so deeply embedded into one another that one would perish without the other. I craved to know how it felt to have someone so in love with you that no matter what happened, they would rather die than be without you.”
Frowning, I searched his darkening gaze before exhaling. “And you told your father how you felt, and he sent you to hell because of it,” I guessed absently.
“Of course, I told him. He was my father, so I shared everything with him. He had never exposed how cold and merciless he could be until I confessed that I wanted to feel love from a woman. I was once his favorite son. I thought maybe, just maybe, if I were like Adam and Eve, he’d love me as he once had. I informed him of what I’d witnessed and that his children could have that, too. I told him that his humans and angels could live together and create a perfectly balanced race. I told him I wanted to know what a woman felt like in that manner. How Adam had looked between her thighs and the pleasure he had taken from her body.” Luc laughed sinisterly and planted his hands on the altar, watching me as his stare turned cold, ruthless, and hard with his words. “He said he had bigger plans for the angels and that coupling with humans would interfere with his master plan. He sent me to Hell and that same day and placed a curse on angels and humans that mated. He created—”
“Nephilims,” I finished his words, hating the way my stomach flip-flopped, knowing that it was why Kendra had died. “He made certain that you wouldn’t chance to lie between a woman’s thighs. He cursed the mother to perish for the monstrosity they would create together.” I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “Back then, you were an angel, Lucifer, which meant you were still pure?”
“I was. Had I known what my father would do, I would never have chanced it occurring. I love women, which is no secret. I was thrown into Hell for wanting what the humans have with the promise that he would bring me home once I’d learned my place, and I’d atoned for wanting what wasn’t mine to have. My father acted like my wanting to feel love was so fucking wrong, but the humans with all their sins weren’t punished like I was. Not even close. He allowed them to live and populate the earth.”
“That couldn’t have been easy for or on you.” I pushed the hair away from my face, noticing the coldness that washed over Luc’s features. The muscles of his neck tightened, and he snorted loudly.
“Do you know what happens to an angel when he enters Hell? Their wings rot to bones, becoming useless. Then, they burn for centuries, charring the bones until the angel transforms and grows into the wing of the monster they become. Wings are the most sensitive place on an angel’s body and have more nerve endings than a woman’s clitoris. After that, Hell claims the angel, using barbs to hold them down, making them into monsters that are never sated or satisfied. There’s nothing but an endless hunger and the need to quench it. Pain that never ends still rips you apart, no matter how long you’ve been there. It is the most horrid way for an angel to go on living, and my father never even tried to get me out. He forgot about me, and eventually, I started hating him.”
“He sounds like a difficult father, Luc,” I uttered hoarsely as pain danced in his deep blue gaze.
“He is not my father any longer, sweet Lena. I’m what this place has made of me. I am the Prince of Hell. I became the monster he accused me of being, and all because I simply wanted to know what Adam had felt with Eve; love, unconditional love for someone else besides myself or my father. I am the monster that Hell needed,” he stated, wincing before he stepped back.
“That’s horrible,” I whispered, unable to imagine the horror he’d felt at being abandoned and left to suffer endlessly. “Nyx said God slept with the serpent and created your race…” I admitted hesitantly, remembering an entirely different conversation with the goddess. “Wait, you watched your mother telling people to fuck, and didn’t think to look away?”
“Nyx wasn’t inside the garden. I started that rumor to get back at my father. Rumors have a way of becoming a version of the truth to the uneducated ear, and it was one of my better lies that got around. You should hear all the shit I created about myself, Lena. You’d be scarred over the stories and would feel sorry for me. What happened to me was horrible, but I adapted. Now I am simply the monster ruling Hell. I am not his favorite son or his beautiful avenging angel that reaped the souls of those bound for Heaven. Gone is the boy who would have wrecked the world to please his father.”
Lucifer smiled as his appearance shimmered, his wings turning white, growing fuller as his skin became iridescent with a pearlescent sheen. Violet eyes watched me, searching my face while his black glyphs turned silver, sparkling in the sunlight, which I was guessing was an illusion.
“Yeah, sorry, Luc.” I smirked at his beautiful image that shimmered in front of me. “I prefer your darker persona much more to this one. This version is a little too sparkly for me. I feel like maybe you should wear a dress, and that harps should strum as a choir sings about your beauty. Give me bad boy Lucifer any day over this pretty boy.”
His lips jerked up into a genuine smile that knocked the air from my lungs as he returned to normal, sucking his plump lip between his perfectly white teeth. His dark head shook, and he slowly turned toward the sound of a babe crying. My heart slid into my throat as my eyes swung in the noise’s direction.
“Makenna,” I whispered breathlessly.
Luc spun, staring at me while I looked toward the muffled cries of the baby. Hesitantly, he walked to me, holding out his hand. “Do you want to meet her? She’s beautiful and looks just like you.”
“I can’t see her and not touch her. Its torture,” I admitted, swallowing thickly as tears burned in my throat.
Lucifer studied me through narrowing eyes. Slowly, he stepped closer to place his lips against my cheek, kissing the tears I hadn’t realized had escaped my eyes. His tongue darted out, tasting them before he moved back, studying me.
“Then hold her, Lena. But know this; I will kill you if you try to take Makenna from me. She is my daughter. I have grown rather attached to her, and she is mine to love selflessly. Come, she’s scared to be alone for too long. Much like your tears, hers hurt me to hear.”
I blinked, slowly jumping down from the altar to smooth out the skirt of my nightgown. I slid my hand into Luc’s as we started walking through the large marble room. He smiled wickedly, his fingers laced through mine, raising my hand to brush a soft kiss over the knuckles.
It took a few minutes to reach a bright pink room that he tugged me inside. My heart stopped and restarted until it was the only thing I could hear as my feet rooted in place, tears swimming in my eyes while I fought the emotion warring through me.
I peered at the tiny form, kicking and waving her arms inside the ivory crib while making sweet cooing noises. Luc went to Makenna, releasing my hand to pluck her gently from bed, mimicking her sounds to soothe her, causing a smile to play on her mouth.
Lucifer smiled back at Makenna, the perfect picture of a father doting on his tiny daughter. Tears slipped free from my hold, slowly trailing down my face. I marveled at Kendra’s daughter, smiling at the Devil with no fear. Her chubby cheeks held dimples, which she had to have inherited from him. Her hand moved to his mouth, and he kissed it absently while she laughed at his antics.
Stepping back, I took in the sight of him holding her, curling her into his arms while she continued smiling up at him like he was her world. Lucifer’s lips brushed Makenna’s forehead, and I frowned at the image of them together. It wasn’t what I’d expected, and it didn’t appear to be faked, either. He smiled at her, turning to look at me with a wicked smirk on his full mouth.
“You look scared, Lena.”
“I’ve never held a baby before,” I admitted, barely above a breath, as he laughed at me. “She’s so beautiful.” He nodded, continuing to hold my gaze while he stroked Makenna’s back softly.
“She takes after her mother, who was very beautiful indeed. I’d like to believe she has some of the Devil inside of her too,” he stated with a softening smile playing on his full lips. “She looks like you, too. Makenna has your eyes, hair, and smile. The way she loves blindly, uncaring that I’m a monster—” he said thickly as if his throat was swelling with emotion. “I think she gets that from you, Magdalena.”
He moved closer, handing Makenna to me before I’d realized his intentions. She fussed, peering up at me while I stared at her in wonder. Tears continued rolling down my cheeks as my heart clenched painfully. She was tiny, weighing next to nothing in my arms. Her hand lifted, brushing over my shoulder while I took in her features.
“Hello, Makenna. Your momma would have loved you so much. You’re perfect, aren’t you, sweetling? You are loved and missed by—me.” I swallowed down the realization that no one else lived to miss her or see how truly beautiful she’d turned out. Her hair was our rich, caramel color, framing wide, curious turquoise eyes that reminded me of the sea after a storm had passed.
Time went by, but I couldn’t look away from her. I felt at a loss for words and what I could offer her. Lucifer loved her. He would fight to protect her, even from me. Makenna peered back at me, her inquisitive stare holding mine while I ran my fingers through her wispy curls.
“You love her unconditionally, don’t you?” I asked, lifting my gaze to lock with his.
“Absolutely, without question,” he stated, smiling at her while she cooed. “She likes you, Lena. She lets no one else hold her, not without screaming her displeasure to the heavens. I had thought about changing her name, but it is something her mother gave her. I think she will like that about it, don’t you?”
“I do,” I admitted, wondering if I was going insane or if the Devil actually loved his child. “Is she your first?” I asked, curiously.
“That I know of, yes. More often than not, I don’t stick around to find out if I’ve fathered a child. If they’re mine, their mother doesn’t survive long enough to ask for help with them, either. To be honest, I wasn’t certain I’d be able to create life after my father had finished with me. I knew the cost Kendra would pay for it, but I didn’t know you at the time, Lena. I’m not sorry for creating Makenna; I can’t be. She’s too perfect to regret.”
“She is perfect,” I admitted, watching her with a tightening in my chest that physically ached.
I lowered my lips to her forehead, feeling the heat coming from her. Makenna was a Nephilim, and they were dangerous creatures. Could I protect her? I couldn’t even escape the apartment where Lucian held me locked away, not that I’d really tried yet. Luc was a protective father. He was attached to Makenna, which was visible by the way he watched over her and cared for her.
I held her out for Lucifer to take her back, noticing how his eyes lifted to hold mine. I smiled tightly, noting his narrowing gaze as if he thought I was rejecting her. Something changed in his posture, and I shook my head, knowing he was assuming wrong.
“I miss my child, too, Luc,” I whispered brokenly, and he nodded his head in realization as he retrieved Makenna from me.
“For what it’s worth, Lena, I am sorry. Grief and rage had fueled my actions. Katarina had a plan that seemed like a good idea to make Lucian pay for what he’d done to us. I hope you understand that I regret my part in it now that I know you. Makenna wasn’t a part of this fight, so when Lucian comes for me, remember her. Eventually, this will spiral out of control, and she’s innocent.” He leaned closer to me, brushing his lips against my forehead as the room started spinning around me.
I appeared back inside the bedroom, lifting my gaze to the darkened corner. I found Lucian sitting in the shadows, studying me as a deep growl escaped him. Leaning forward into the light, he steepled his hands in front of his mouth. His posture was rigid and deadly, and his eyes burned with anger.
“Did he hurt you?” he asked softly.
“No, but he allowed me to hold Makenna. He loves her, Lucian.”
“Lucifer doesn’t care about anything or anyone except himself.” He stood to remove his suit jacket, slowly folding it to set it aside. “Be careful with him, Lena. He may have been an angel, but he’s long since abandoned any decency he once held. I’m going to shower, and you will join me. I intend to rest without smelling him on your skin, let alone knowing you allowed him to taste your tears. Come, I enjoy my showers with you more than I do alone.”
