Cruel Control by Candace Wondrak
Chapter Eight – Markus
I went to her because I knew she would not listen to me. I went to her because I had to show her that I was not above creating pain—whether it was pain in her little body or someone else’s—all to get her to listen, to do as I said.
Everyone else in this house understood, but Juliet felt the need to spit in my face and challenge me any way she could. It was insanely aggravating, and I was done playing nice. I had to remind her that she was here because I brought her here, because I took the initiative to steal her away from her precious father.
Jaxon stood just outside her room, looking anything but stoic. I knew what he was thinking, knew why he looked so torn. He liked the girl. I supposed I couldn’t blame him, for sometimes the monsters in us craved someone who would look upon our true face, see our darkness in all its blood and glory and revel with us. Such as it was with Lincoln, Ed, Killian, and Stella.
But sometimes… sometimes the beast inside cried out not for another monster to dance with, but for the opposite. For the pure. For the innocent. For the light in the ever-lasting darkness that was this life.
For what was the devil if there was no God? What was sin if there was no virtue?
Her door was closed, and I stopped before Jaxon, causing his gaze to snap up to me. Though a part of me wanted to wrap my hand around his neck and squeeze, remind him that she was just a job—remind us both of that fact—I held back and asked, “How is she?”
My guess would be not too well, not after her meeting with Doc earlier. If her mood when she’d stormed into my office was any indication, she would still be quite pissed off at me now. Was it wrong to be a certain sort of thrilled to know I could rile her up so easily?
Hmm. I supposed the same could be said of the opposite, because that girl made me want to lose control like no other. And I never lost control.
“Not happy,” Jaxon replied. “She refused to eat dinner.”
Hearing that did not make me pleased, and my teeth ground as I glanced toward the door. “Get me a glass of water, will you?” Though it sounded like I was asking him for a favor, I was not. I was simply telling him to get me water. Or, rather, get Juliet water, because it wasn’t for me.
Needed to make sure she actually took her pill, you see. Couldn’t trust that girl to listen to me and do as I said, so I would have to play the dictator and punish.
As Jaxon nodded and walked away to get that glass of water, I pushed into her room. I didn’t even knock. I found Juliet sitting on her bed, wearing those hideous fuzzy pajamas—I would burn them if I could, but she seemed to hold them quite close to her heart, as fucking stupid as it was. I supposed I’d let her keep the ugly pajamas.
Her big, blue eyes glanced up, her face instantly hardening when she saw it was me. I could tell she wanted to say something, but whatever it was, she managed to hold it back, which was probably smart. Anything she might say would only rile me up further, and having her on a bed was all too tempting.
“I sent Jaxon for some water,” I told her. “You’re going to take your pill.”
Her chin jutted out, and she stared at me defiantly. “You’ll have to push it down my throat.”
I took a step closer to her bed, cocking my head as I studied her and those ugly as hell pajamas. “Was that an invitation?” I mocked her. I saw the vitamins and birth control sitting on her nightstand, and I almost smiled—but then I remembered what Jaxon had told me. “You didn’t eat dinner.”
“I wasn’t feeling very hungry,” she mumbled, still glaring at me, as if her glare was a weapon. How ridiculous. She was like a kitten giving me a pouting look—it wasn’t very intimidating. More laughable than anything else.
“No more skipping meals.”
She shot me a frown, her full lips redder than they should be, given the fact she wore no makeup. “Why does it even matter to you? Why does it matter if I eat, if I take the stupid vitamins—”
In the next moment, I was at her bedside, leaning over it, over her. Whatever other words she might’ve said were caught in her throat, and she fell backward. I took hold of her hips, pulling her to the edge of the bed, so I could better block out everything in the room from her. Her small, wriggling body was all too easy for me to maneuver, and once she was under me, she ceased her struggling.
Kind of like what she did when I had her bent over my desk. Oh… I’d be lying if I said I never thought of that encounter.
“It matters because I say it does,” I told her, grabbing her wrists and holding them to the side. She had no strength, no muscles compared to me. She was small where I was big, and it was almost effortless to remind her that she had no power here, even though she desperately tried to gain just an ounce of it at any opportunity.
“Why?” she asked, her voice hitching, a breathless word I felt in every part of my body. I should let her go, I should take a few steps away from her, but I found I could not. Releasing her would be like cutting off my own skin; I didn’t want to do it.
Could I? Yes, but I would feel her loss immediately.
“Why does it matter to you?” Juliet tried to speak again, this time getting a full question out, at least. She breathed through her mouth, practically panting, her blue gaze both livid and resigned to whatever fate would take her tonight.
Fuck. Of course I wanted her. I had wrestled with myself quite a bit when it came to this girl and the invisible power she seemed to hold over me without trying. She should be just a job to me, and yet she wasn’t. She was so much more, and that’s why my mind occasionally got the best of me.
I wanted to tear off those stupid pajamas, shred them into pieces until I got at her naked skin. I wanted to run my hands down her hips, dig my fingers into her sides and make her squirm. I wanted to wrap my hand around that slender neck and squeeze as I spread her legs around me. Take her, claim her, mark her, taint her.
I was supposed to be better than everyone else, and yet, it would seem, I still had the baser instincts, too. My father would be disappointed in me. So, I guess it’s a good thing the man wasn’t here anymore.
“It matters,” I whispered, feeling suppressed in my suit quite suddenly, “because when you are here, you are mine. My responsibility, my duty, my job. I will hurt you, Juliet, but I will also make sure you are well taken care of.” Just because I was a monster did not mean I could not also be kind. Even the worst of us had our moments.
Pushing myself off her, I straightened myself right when Jaxon returned, carrying a glass of water. He saw me, saw Juliet slowly sitting back up on the bed, but he said nothing as he moved to my side and handed me the water.
I set it on her nightstand, near the pills. I did not look at her as I said, “Now, take one.”
Juliet made no moves to do as I said. She merely rubbed her wrists and stared at me hard, just begging for my inner monster to make an appearance. The girl thought she knew what we did here? She thought she knew what I was capable of? Oh, the poor girl. The poor, stupid girl. She really had no idea.
But I’d show her, and I’d start tonight.
I reached down, undoing the buttons of my suit jacket. “Take the pill, Juliet.” Still, the girl made no moves to do so, and I shrugged the jacket off, folding it neatly. I moved to set it atop a dresser behind me.
A mirror sat atop the dresser, allowing me to see Juliet’s reflection on the bed as I worked at loosening my tie. “Take the fucking pill,” I growled out, staring at her in the mirror, feeling my blood start to pump hotter.
She didn’t. Juliet was motionless, watching me. I couldn’t blame her. She had no idea about this ritual of mine. She did not know what came after all this, and when she did, I had the feeling she would regret ever riling up the beast inside me.
I set my tie atop the folded jacket, and then I went to unbutton the buttons near my wrists on my shirt sleeves. The fabric was a dark grey, but still. You couldn’t be too careful. I was not a big fan of messes, and I hated getting blood on my clothes. Sometimes it must be done and there was nothing you could do about it, but I tried not to be excessive.
“Your last chance,” I warned, and still the girl made no moves. Not that I expected her to. This was remarkably on-character for her, which was surprising, in a way, considering how brainwashed her father had her. Her feistiness had come as a shock, but she needed to learn to listen to her master.
And right now, that master was me.
Once my sleeves were rolled up to my elbows, I undid my watch and set it atop my clothes on the dresser. I turned to face her. “I gave you an order, Juliet,” I told her. “And you refused. I gave you multiple chances to avoid conflict, and yet here we are. If you’re not scared of me, you will be.”
My feet drew me to her dresser, and I grabbed the plastic rectangle the birth control was in, tossing it on the bed. It landed right next to her, but she did not move a single muscle.
I watched, half of me wishing she would just take the pill so we could be done with this, but the other half of me wanted to show her just a hint of the darkness residing inside me. She thought she knew all about me after that video we’d recorded to send to her father? She was wrong.
“A pity,” I said, turning away from her as I met Jaxon’s knowing green eyes. He knew. He knew what was coming, and he also knew I would take more pleasure in it than I normally would. Jaxon was motionless as I went to stand behind him, standing taller than him. I set my hands on his shoulders, squeezing as I glanced at her. “You’ve gotten pretty close to Jaxon, haven’t you?”
She said nothing, and Jaxon himself remained silent. Nothing either of them could say would stop this train from coming into town now.
“I find that a little funny, since he was the one who stole you from your home and brought you to me,” I went on. “Now, I like Jaxon, too. I trust him a lot more than I trust some of my own brothers.” My hands fell off his shoulders, and I moved to stand beside him, shooting him a hard look. “But lately I’ve seen things. Passing looks. Body language you wouldn’t see unless you were paying attention. For what it’s worth, Juliet, I think Jaxon likes you, too.”
I gave Jaxon a good slap on his back, causing him to sway on his feet a little. “Normally, I wouldn’t give a shit about who takes up the space in Jaxon’s mind, but you? Oh, you’re not allowed to be there, you see, because I told him you were strictly off-limits in every way.”
Juliet was finally starting to understand what deep shit she’d unloaded onto Jaxon, for she started to look between us with concern on her petite features.
“He’s not allowed to touch you, and he certainly isn’t allowed to think about you,” I went on. Moving, I stopped when I stood before him. He and I stared at each other for a few long moments, the silence of the room stretching between us. When I spoke again, I spoke to Juliet, even though I wasn’t looking at her, “You should’ve taken your pill, for his sake.”
And then, without warning, my fingers curled into a fist and I punched him across the face, clean along the jaw. I hit him once, but I hit him so hard he stumbled. I didn’t hold anything back. I let every ounce of power inside me out in that punch, and I was certain Jaxon saw stars.
“No!” Juliet cried out once, her feet dangling off the bed. “Don’t—”
I glared at her. “Don’t what? You seem to think you’re invincible here. I told you I could hurt you, but what I didn’t tell you is that I can hurt anyone I want. Whoever will serve the best purpose, to finally get it through your skull.”
Jaxon straightened himself, and he said not a word even though his jaw was already beet red. Oh, that would leave a terrible bruise… but I wasn’t quite done yet.
The next punch was to his stomach, an underhanded blow that knocked the air out of his lungs. Jaxon wheezed, and I hit him again in the same place, causing him to double over and fall to his knees before me.
Juliet launched herself off the bed, racing to my side. “No, please, don’t—” Again, she tried begging me; she even tried to grab onto my arm, the fool.
While she was latched onto one arm, my other snapped up, a hand curling around her neck and forcing her off me. “No,” I hissed. “You don’t get to tell me what to do. You’re going to watch while I beat Jaxon into a bloody fucking pulp, and you’re going to do it while knowing it’s your fault.”
I pushed her away from me, causing her back to hit the lower frame of the bed. All she seemed to be able to do was stare at me with wide eyes, to stare at Jaxon with equally wide eyes. Oh, she definitely cared about him, all right. Didn’t know how the fuck that happened or why, but I didn’t particularly like it.
When Jaxon got up, I hit him again. And again. His nose started to bleed, his face all bruised. I went to town on him like I’d never gone to town before, and even though my knuckles should ache with each blow—it wasn’t long since I’d cracked the skin on the tiled wall in the shower—I felt nothing. No pain, no soreness. I felt nothing but the rush of adrenaline in my body.
Adrenaline, and… something else. Something I couldn’t quite describe. A hidden anger inside of me, a fury that was only there because I didn’t want Jaxon to have a connection with Juliet.
Was it jealousy? Was it envy? I couldn’t say, because I had nothing to compare it to, and yet, when I tried to describe it as anything else, nothing else felt quite as right.
“Stop,” Juliet cried out, rushing to her nightstand and fumbling as she opened the plastic packet to get at the pills. “I’ll take it, okay? I’ll take the stupid pill.” Her hands shook as she pushed out a single pill, its small white body lying flat in her palm as she grabbed the glass of water.
I had Jaxon’s neck in my hand, about to punch him again in the face—he looked like he wanted to pass out, but he was fighting it. Jaxon was, if anything, a trooper. I paused, my eyes on Juliet, on watching her place the pill onto her tongue. I didn’t even blink as she lifted the glass to her lips and drank from it.
Once the pill was swallowed, she set down the glass and said, “See? There you go. You can stop hurting him now.”
“Come here,” I growled out, and Juliet inched to my side begrudgingly. I still held Jaxon’s throat in my hand, my other still curled into a fist. I would not let him go until I was sure she’d actually swallowed the damn pill and wasn’t trying to pull a fast one on me. Once she was beside me, I said, “Open your mouth, let me see.”
Her lips parted, and she moved her tongue around, showing me.
“Your gums,” I added.
Juliet looked as though she wanted to roll her eyes, but she held back, reaching a finger to her lower lip and pulling it down, doing the same to her upper lip. “There, are you happy? It’s done. Please, Markus, stop hurting him.”
I shoved Jaxon away, and he fell to the floor, too beat up to catch himself. I towered over Juliet. “It didn’t have to be like this,” I told her. “We could’ve avoided all of this if you’d just taken your damn pill like I told you to. Look at him.” I pointed to Jaxon, watching as her blue eyes darted to him, to his disheveled, crumpled form. “That’s on you. He might be a part of the family, but he knows his place. The only one who can save him from another beating is you.”
Juliet opened her mouth, and I could only imagine what she’d say to me in that moment. I didn’t give her the chance to speak, for I walked away from her, away from Jaxon. I gathered my things, and then I left. The longer I lingered there, the more I would feel the jealousy inside.
Oh, I could imagine what she’d say to me after that. I was a monster. A monster who could hurt his own family without even blinking. That didn’t say much, for I could hurt anyone without blinking. Pain… I never felt it, never understood it, and yet it could be a great tool.
Pain. I was not above inflicting pain on anyone to get that girl to listen to me. Sooner or later Juliet would realize everything I did, everything I would do was all for her. To keep her safe.
That’s what I told myself, anyway, but the truth was murkier than that. Her father was a piece of work, but Juliet… she was everything I never had. A delicate, pretty flower that needed constant care in order to bloom. Beautiful and entrancing, far too innocent for the world she was in.
The monster in me wanted an angel. A virtuous, pure angel it could protect and claim, taint and cage. Someone who could remind me of everything I never felt, teach me everything I was clueless about. Pain, jealousy, obsession.
One thing was certain, though. A man like me could never learn to love.
