Fragile Longing by Cora Reilly

I’d always wanted kids, and not just because I needed an heir who could become Underboss one day. I wanted a family and the special bond a father shared with his children. I still often missed my father, the long conversations about business, sports, and pretty much anything else. He’d been my most trusted confidante. I trusted Marco and knew he wouldn’t betray me, but it was still not quite the same as the bond with my father had been. I didn’t discuss everything I would have discussed with my father with him.

Sofia was young and I knew she needed a few years before she’d be ready to have children. I was willing to give her the time she needed even if I couldn’t wait forever.

Shortly after her twenty-third birthday, Sofia bridged the subject again herself, surprising me. We’d had dinner at our favorite fine-dining restaurant and afterward taken a naked swim in the pool before making love in the shower. Now we lay in each other’s arms in bed, sated in more than one way and ready to fall asleep.

“I’ve been thinking about not taking the pill anymore.”

Surprised, I pulled back to look at Sofia’s beautiful face. Her cheeks were still flushed from sex and I loved that her skin always showed proof of our lovemaking for so long. “Do you feel ready?”

At thirty-three, I was definitely at an age where questions about my childless, especially son-less, state were coming up more frequently. Everyone felt as if they had a right to meddle. My mother was among them.

Sofia laughed, then shrugged. “Does anyone ever feel ready? Is there something like the perfect timing for children?”

“I guess not, but you’re still young.”

“We’ve experienced so much in the last five years, and I’m glad you gave me the time to get my bachelor’s degree. Some men don’t want to wait for an heir.”

“I wanted to make you happy and give us the chance to grow as a couple. I think a couple needs to be a family first before they can expand with kids.”

Sofia smiled widely. “But I feel as if we’ve arrived. Our relationship is great. I don’t have any doubts, do you?”

“About us? Never. Nor do I have any doubts that you’ll be a great mother. I can’t wait to have kids with you.”

“So, we’re going to start working on kids?”

I chuckled and let my hand run down Sofia’s belly. “You make it sound as if it’s hard work.”

Sofia grinned. “Sometimes it is, but it’s always worth it.”

Sofia waited for me in the foyer when I came home, looking ready to burst. Our dog Poof, looking like a bouncing fluff-ball as he greeted me, was at her side as usual. Since she’d gotten the dog a year ago, he’d become very protective of her. Of course, given his size, his value as a guard dog was minimal, but he made Sofia happy.

Before I could ask what the matter was, she brandished a pregnancy test, her face breaking into a huge smile. I raised my eyebrows. “You’re—”

“Pregnant!” She rushed toward me and flung herself into my arms. Poof barked excitedly. I lifted Sofia off the ground, kissing her temple. It had taken us almost six months and I’d started to worry, so a weight now lifted off my shoulders. We’d become a family. I couldn’t wait.

She shoved an ultrasound image at me. I glanced down at the black-and-white image but had no clue what to look for. There was a big round shape with two smaller forms. “So, she confirmed your pregnancy? Everything is okay?”

Sofia pointed at the two smaller forms in the black circles. “Two.”

“Two,” I repeated, not sure what she was referring to. “You’re two months along?” I thought she was already in her third month.

Sofia gripped my arm. “Two babies! Twins!”

I stared at her. “You’re pregnant with twins?”

She nodded. “Identical twins.”

“Oh, wow.” I stared down at her still flat stomach, unable to believe that she harbored two babies inside.

“Yeah. It’s too early to see if they are two boys or two girls. I’m so excited.”

I pulled her against me. “Your family has it with twins.”

Sofia laughed. “It’s in our blood.”

“Apparently.” We stared at each other, and it still seemed impossible that we’d arrived here. “I love you, Mrs. Mancini.”

She grinned. “And I love you, Mr. Mancini.” She bit her lip. “Do you mind if I tell my parents? They’ll be ecstatic to hear we’re having twins, especially identical twins. Mom will probably want to go shopping with me for matching outfits right away.”

“Tell your parents, and I’ll tell my mother. She’ll probably want to go shopping with you as well. Those babies will be the best-dressed babies in Indianapolis.”

Sofia rolled her eyes, but I didn’t miss the smile she tried to stifle. I kissed her knuckles. “Next time I want to go with you to the doctor’s appointment.” That earned me a kiss before Sofia dashed off to call her parents. I watched her almost skip the steps in search for her cell phone. I loved her exuberance.

I called my mother. She hadn’t found another man since Dad had died, even though I’d encouraged her to give a new love a chance. There were a few nice widowers among my men and even among the Captains, but she had insisted on being alone. She was eager for grandchildren from me, so the name Mancini could live on and Dad’s genes could carry on.

“Danilo,” Mom said happily. “You just caught me before brunch with my ladies’ club.” Her ladies’ club consisted of the wives of the Captains and a few high-society ladies with links to the Outfit, and they met twice a week for brunch and gossip. I was glad she kept herself busy with brunch and social events.

“I won’t take long. Sofia had another ultrasound today.”

“How’s my grandchild doing? And how’s Sofia?” Her voice rose with excitement.

“They are doing well. The kids and Sofia.”

A moment of silence followed, then, “Kids?”

“Sofia is pregnant with twins.”

Mom laughed. “The Mione twin gene! I can’t believe it. How wonderful! Do you know the gender yet?”

“It’s too soon, but they are identical twins so they’re either two boys or two girls.”

Two months later, the gynecologist told us that we were expecting two boys. Sofia squeezed my hand firmly. “Are you happy?”

“I am, but I’ve been happy from the day I found out you were pregnant. I would have loved to have two daughters as well.”

“Then we would have had to keep trying until you got an heir, you know.”

I regarded her carefully. “You don’t want more than two?”

Sofia shrugged. “Two is a good number. I know many girls desperately want a daughter to dress up, but I think I’d be perfectly happy with two cute boys to dote on. I’m in no hurry to get pregnant with a third child.” She rubbed her lower back with an apologetic smile.

“I’d be happy with just two kids, but you’re still young, so if you ever change your mind, we can still give another child a chance,” I said.

After finding out the gender, everyone congratulated me. I could tell that they considered two boys a victory, especially the men. I was just relieved that Sofia wouldn’t feel pressured to give me an heir anymore.

I couldn’t wait to go hunting and hiking with my boys, to teach them all I knew about guns and show them how to fight. My dad had done all those things with me and I wanted to share that with my sons.

Danilo carried both boys in his arms while I held Poof by the leash. Those boys loved Danilo like crazy, and always wanted to be held by him when he was home. He had to work a lot, so it was only natural that they sought his closeness whenever they got the chance, and Danilo tried to make time for them as often as possible. I wasn’t too sad when they clung to Danilo occasionally. They were quite a handful, Orlando more so than Aldo, who’d been named after Danilo’s father, but together they were a force to be reckoned with. They were hard to contain sometimes.

Our cat, a red tabby stray that had one day appeared on our doorstep and never left, had chosen one of the trees in our garden as her favorite resting spot because the boys couldn’t reach her there. Not that she didn’t know how to defend herself. Both boys had been scratched more than once because they tried to carry her around. Most of the time she sat on the bench close to the pond, watching the Koi, but she never tried to hunt them—which was why Danilo had allowed her to stay.

Orlando gave me a huge grin from his dad’s arm. They were the spitting image of Danilo.

Mom opened the door before we could ring the bell, beaming at us. As usual, she was styled to perfection with an elegant updo, a woolen pencil skirt, and a flowy silk blouse. At least she wasn’t wearing long earrings or thin necklaces. Despite her perfect styling, she pulled me into a tight hug before she ripped Orlando from Danilo’s hold and pressed him to her chest, not caring if her blouse got wrinkled.

Danilo chuckled. “Good day to you too, Ines.”

“Danilo,” she said with a laugh and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before she turned to Aldo. “I don’t think Grandma’s strong enough to carry both of you boys.” He pouted, but Dad saved the day, appearing in the doorway. The gray streaks in his dark hair were now more dominant and the wrinkles around his eyes had deepened, but to me he still looked like the man who had walked me down the aisle to the altar. He hugged me tightly. “You look beautiful as always, ladybug. I don’t know how you find time with those two boys.”

“Some days I don’t,” I said with an exasperated laugh. It had gotten better now that they were a bit older and could keep each other entertained. But leaving them to their own devices always posed a risk to our furniture. I’d learned not to leave Poof alone with them because they’d turned him red and blue with watercolor last time.

Dad took Aldo from Danilo, then shook his hand.

“I hope you’re hungry. We’ve prepared a big feast for tonight.”

“You don’t always have to go to such troubles when we visit,” I said with a laugh. I saw my parents at least once a month, so it wasn’t like we had to celebrate reuniting.

Mom waved me off. “I’m sure the boys are hungry.”

“They always are,” Danilo said.

Mom and Dad went inside with the boys, leaving us on the doorstep.

I gave Danilo an amused look. “They wouldn’t even notice if we just disappeared.”

“Then let’s take our luggage up to the guestroom and rest a bit until dinner,” Danilo suggested in a low voice.

“That sounds like a good idea.”

We hurried upstairs. From somewhere in the house I could hear delighted laughter of the boys.

The moment Danilo and I were behind closed doors, we ripped our clothes off, enjoying our time off.

Later at dinner, the boys practically ate their body weight in food, but I also ate more than I should have. Dad and Danilo discussed their upcoming hunting trip, a men’s weekend with Samuel and Marco. The boys would be staying with me, and Mom would come for a visit to help me. At two, they were still far too young to go along on the trip.

Orlando’s head sagged forward, his forehead briefly touching the mashed potatoes before he jerked back up. Aldo was still poking around in his food. Mom laughed and got up to clean him. Her eyes sparkled as she looked at me. Dad looked relaxed and eager for his trip.

The past really had been put to rest. We’d gone through some difficult times, but we were happy now.

Danilo met my gaze and smiled, the dimple flashing in his cheek. Whatever lay ahead of us, I was confident we’d master it.

The End

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