Now Or Never by Stella Rhys

32

HOLLAND

I madethe crucial mistake of waiting for a coworker who insisted I skip the train and let her drive me home, because she wound up getting caught up in a long heart-to-heart with Freya, and I missed the train I would have taken home, which was why I was now, at nearly 5PM, hustling back to my apartment with the straps of my tote repeatedly falling off my shoulder, and my chest still heavy with the weight of the last text Iain had sent.

IAIN: Adam can’t know

It had come forty-five minutes after my question, despite the fact that we had been texting steadily for a full hour before with barely any wait time between messages.

And it wasn’t technically unreasonable. I wasn’t fully sure myself that I wanted to tell Adam yet anyway. It already felt like I was constantly trying to catch up on telling Mia everything she wanted to understand about my relationship with Iain, so I could only imagine how much more I’d have to talk about if Adam knew, because if Adam knew, A.J knew, and I just wanted to enjoy the peace for a little. So I could understand not telling Adam.

But something about Iain’s text made me nervous.

Enough that I’d texted after if he was okay, and his response to that was quick: I’m okay.

Oddly enough, not comforting.

Because he had never been a man of many words but still—something about it felt so off and all I wanted was to call and hear the sound of his voice. To gauge how he was feeling. But he was with my brother.

So I called my brother.

Of course, timing had it so I caught Adam just as Iain was in the middle of saying hi to all their law school friends who had just come in to meet them at brunch. I could actually hear all they boisterous greetings and fanfare. I had heard bits of conversation, how happy they were to be in New York. I heard Adam tell everyone to say hi to me, and everyone chorused “hiii Holland.”

But then Adam said he had to go and hung up.

And since I didn’t want to come off as a clingy, needy kid sister, I refrained from calling back or texting Iain, realizing that what I needed most was to just see them in person to figure everything out face to face.

Which was why I was now standing in a full train in a sandy beach cover-up with a bag full of towels and sunscreen, eagerly waiting to get home, get showered and get dressed so I could text Adam to send me the location of where he was at that point.

Because I couldn’t help feeling vaguely worried and wishing I could see what Adam and Iain were up to. But Adam had deleted his Instagram since becoming a senior agent.

A.J, however.

I paused, suddenly remembering seeing her Instagram story last night. It was a silly picture of her fiance sitting in her open suitcase with the caption “when he doesn’t want you to leave.”

Thank God,I thought when I realized she’d come on this trip too.

I was a stop from my house at Third Avenue when I went to look at A.J’s story.

Updated twelve minutes ago.

Yes.

Holding my phone close, I clicked on the story, watching the video set inside a flashy, arty, part-wild, part-fancy lounge that I didn’t recognize and would never know without the likes of Adam or Iain. The caption was “nights on The Bowery” but there was no location tag to show exactly where on Bowery they were.

I squinted, watching closely as the video surveyed the enormous space, going from the mural-painted walls to the funky sculptures to the cocktail waitress leaning over their very long, very crowded U-shaped booth.

And what I saw a flash of just before the video ended made my stomach lurch.

I stared, unblinking, but by the time I tried to replay, it wouldn’t load because my service dropped out, leaving me to curse the train I was on for the tenth time today—and to wonder what the hell could’ve possibly happened since my last text to Iain.

* * *

I knewI’d run into Mia when I got home since her shift didn’t start for another two hours, but I didn’t plan on telling her anything until I got into the apartment and saw her coming out of the bathroom in her robe with her hair wet.

“Inappropriate, but I thought about your boyfriend the whole time in there. Do you think he used the coconut body wash or the grapefruit?” she joked. But when I couldn’t laugh or respond she frowned. “Oh God. What’s wrong?”

“He’s out with my brother and their law school friends and I saw in A.J’s Instagram story that he’s with a woman.”

Mia stopped in the middle of the living room and stared. “Wait. What? What do you mean ‘with’ a woman? What woman?”

“They’re at some lounge and I guess my brother or one of his friends invited a bunch of girls. They’re all packed into this big leather booth and this—” Absolutely gorgeous brunette in the lowest-cut dress. I took in a deep breath and gathered myself. “This very attractive woman is basically smashed up against him with his arm between her boobs and she was whispering in his ear.”

Mia hit me with a dry look. “Dude. That’s nothing. That’s just a typical night out and a crowded table with—”

“He was smiling in this way,” I added, my heart thumping again at the memory as I pulled up the video on my phone and played it for Mia.

Crap, I thought as I watched her eyes immediately go wide and her eyebrows pinch into a frown. And just like that she became Mama Bear Mia.

“Okay, first of all,” she said defensively as she stood straight again. “Fuck that bitch—if no one else is licking each other’s ears to talk at that table, it’s definitely not that loud and she does not need to be all up in his business like that,” she declared heatedly. “Second, that is not Mr. Ass.”

I stared at her. “What are you talking about? That’s obviously Iain.”

“I know, Holland. What I’m saying is he’s acting totally different. I’ve spent years watching him do meetings at my bar and get hit on by all kinds of beautiful women, and he always looks bored beyond belief. He won’t even humor girls even when his clients clearly want him to, so unless your brother is the one exception, something is up right now.”

I was still standing at the door as I stared at Mia, my heart beating even faster now because I knew she was right.

He wasn’t being himself. He had flipped a switch.

And I didn’t know why.

But I needed to figure it out.

“Who are you texting now?” Mia asked.

“Adam,” I said, still typing furiously. “To see where to meet them.”

“You know you have to show up looking hotter than hell, right?”

I finished sending my text and looked up at her.

And with the quickest wordless exchange she nodded and said, “Yeah, come on. Let’s doll you the fuck up.”