Crash by Jeanne St. James

Chapter Sixteen

The rumbleof straight pipes burrowed deep into her chest, where her heart was already trying to knock open a hole.

She had no fingernails left from chewing them down to the quick.

She had no nail polish left from picking at it nervously.

She had no lip gloss left from gnawing on her bottom lip.

She’d been using one foot for the last hour and a half to keep the rocking chair in motion as she stared out over the space between Trip and Stella’s farmhouse and The Barn.

Luckily, she’d only seen one person other than Ozzy, and that was the prospect Tater Tot, in all the time she waited. He gave her a strange look and a chin lift as he rode his sled past the house to the shed where he stored it. But that was forty-five minutes ago.

Now she hoped the sound of the approaching Harley belonged to Trip. As it came down the lane, it slowed and she kept her eyes glued to the corner of the house, waiting.

When she saw who it was, her pounding heart leapt into her throat.

It was time.

Two pairs of dark sunglasses turned toward her as the sled rounded the porch and stopped in front of it.

Trip set the kickstand and shut off his bike, never taking his eyes from Liz.

Liz sure as hell hoped Ozzy hadn’t given them a heads up. If he did, she’d never forgive him.

It was difficult to read Stella’s expression since the lower half of her face was covered with a black paisley bandana. As soon as she pulled it down and pushed her sunglasses to the top of her head, Liz had no problem seeing Stella’s confusion at Liz being on their back porch.

Trip assisted his ol’ lady from his sled before he dismounted, then they both approached the house as a united front with their fingers intertwined together.

True love.

Soulmates.

Liz wasn’t sure true soulmates existed until the couple’s wedding and also seeing them now, ready to bring their first child together into the world.

Trip had to be over the moon.

Liz wasn’t sure about Stella since she had heard a rumor that the prez’s ol’ lady had tragically lost a child years ago. That was why she hadn’t been in a rush to give Trip the babies he wanted so desperately. She had needed more time to heal and for her relationship with Trip to grow.

Liz wondered if any mother could completely heal after losing a child. Probably not. That kind of loss had to leave a gaping hole in anyone’s heart for the rest of their life.

But that child Stella lost was Liz’s niece or nephew, too. She hoped one day Stella would be comfortable enough with her to share. But Liz would understand if she wasn’t and would never push her sister to do so.

She rose from the rocking chair as they climbed the porch steps and stopped.

Neither said a word but Liz could see the questions on their faces, especially Trip’s.

“I bet you never expected me to be waiting for you,” Liz said with an awkward, dry laugh.

Trip tipped his head to the side when he answered, “Can honestly say I wasn’t expectin’ you to come back. Figured you thought the grass was greener south of here. Guess it ain’t.”

“Did they want you to be a sweet butt?” Stella asked, not hiding her surprise.

Liz shook her head. “Not at all.”

“Not sure why you’re on our porch, then. There a problem with the Angels you need to tell us about?” Trip asked.

“No, no problems that I’m aware of. I… I came to talk to Stella… Well, both of you.”

Trip frowned, shooting his ol’ lady a quick glance. Stella’s dark eyebrows rose. Since they never had any kind of relationship before, not even a friendship, Liz could see why the other woman would be confused. Maybe even wary.

“But first,” Liz started, “I heard congratulations are in order.”

Trip’s eyes narrowed and a couple heartbeats later he demanded, “Who told you?”

She would never rat out Ozzy. “Apparently, you going along with Stella to the doctor was a huge flashing neon sign.”

Trip dropped his head to stare at his boots, releasing a sharp, “Fuck.” He shook his head and lifted it.

“Honestly, we all figured it would happen not long after the wedding, so no one will be surprised.”

Trip’s mouth pulled tight at the corners. “It’s early, didn’t want anyone to know yet.”

“I told you, you should’ve met me there,” Stella said with a sigh, patting his gut under his open cut. “I guess now you can run around screaming it at the top of your lungs like you’ve been wanting to do.”

He scratched the back of his neck. “Was thinkin’ about rentin’ one of those planes with the banners. One that announces in all caps, ‘I’m havin’ a fuckin’ son!’”

Stella snorted softly. “You know you can’t guarantee that, right? Carly reminded you at least twenty times already that you have a fifty-fifty chance of having a daughter.”

“Fuck that. If it came from my nuts, it’ll be a boy.”

Liz and Stella shared a look, then Stella rolled her eyes before telling Liz, “Just to clarify, in case there’s any question, the sperm came from his nuts.”

Liz laughed, which slightly loosened the ball of tension in her gut.

“Yeah, well. Want two boys, if it takes havin’ ten girls before I get my two boys, then that’s what’s gotta happen.”

“Keep thinking that, Stud,” Stella said on a sigh. “You’ll get what you get and that’s it. Remember, it’s your swimmers that decide the sex of the baby.”

“That’s why I said what I said.”

Stella shook her head. “Anyway… You must be waiting for us for a reason, Lizzy. You said you wanted to talk to me. What about?”

“Liz, please. Lizzy was a sweet butt and I’m no longer one.” She was never a big fan of the nickname Lizzy, so it was a good time to have people stop using it.

Trip stared at her for a long moment. “You got Ozzy all twisted up.”

Before Liz could respond to that, Stella stepped in. “Well, it sounds like someone came along and swept the woman off her feet. You can’t blame her for leaving.”

“Someone came along and yanked the rug from under Ozzy’s boots and knocked him on his fuckin’ ass when he wasn’t expectin’ it,” Trip corrected. “You could say someone made his ass crash.”

Liz’s gaze volleyed back and forth between the couple.

“He should’ve been expecting it.” Stella shrugged, not looking concerned. “He had plenty of time to make Liz his ol’ lady if he wanted to. He didn’t, so it’s his loss.”

Liz decided to interject. “It was never like that between us.”

Trip barked out a dry laugh but didn’t argue. He sharply clapped his hands together once. “Well, I’m fuckin’ starvin’ and need to get some food in my wife’s belly so my kid can eat, too. What do you need from us?”

“A few moments of your time.” Actually, more than a few moments, but a few would be a good start.

“Shoot,” Trip told her.

This wasn’t going to be any kind of casual conversation so she wasn’t sure it should be done on the porch.

When she hesitated, Stella asked, “This is something we should go inside for, isn’t it?”

Liz nodded, that sick to her stomach feeling quickly returning.

“Trip, why don’t we go inside and you can make us dinner.”

The Fury president’s mouth opened as he stared at Stella. His gaze then sliced to Liz before landing back on his wife. He whispered a soft, “Shit,” when he got a clue that whatever Liz was there to talk about might be serious.

He flipped off his black baseball cap, combed his fingers through his hair and slapped it back on as he always did out of habit. Then he nodded, went to the back door that led into the kitchen and held it open for Liz and Stella.

She followed Stella inside. Not only was a baby about to change her sister’s life, so was Liz. She pulled in a deep breath through her nose, trying to settle her churning stomach.

“Sit,” Stella said, pulling out a chair for Liz at the kitchen table Trip’s grandfather hand-crafted decades ago.

Liz loved the old farmhouse. Over the past couple of years, Trip had done a lot of improvements, getting it ready for his own family. She could picture two energetic, young boys chasing each other around the same table while their father stood at the counter making them a snack.

Her eyes began to sting. She wasn’t sure if it was because she might miss out on a lot of that or because she wanted the same for her very own.

She was thirty-two and had time to decide, but she couldn’t wait too long. And she had no idea how Crash felt about kids. He’d made it to his mid-forties without having any. She had even confirmed that one night by outright asking. He answered no with complete confidence, so Liz didn’t expect some surprise mini-Crashes to come crashing out of the woodwork.

But did that mean he never wanted any? Did he believe he was past the age of raising children? Kids were a lot of work and took a lot of energy—

Another chair scraping along the wood floor snapped her out of her thoughts. Thoughts that were very premature for her and Crash’s relationship.

Thoughts she never considered before now.

Stella settled across from her after putting a glass full of ice and iced tea in front of both of them.

“Why do I feel like I need to brace for this conversation?” Stella asked, then took a sip of her tea.

Trip was busy grabbing stuff from the fridge, but Liz was sure his ears were perked. If this conversation had to do with his wife, then it had to do with him. That was the way Trip was. Protective and possessive. Especially of Stella.

Now that she carried his child, he might get even more intense about it.

Liz also knew he paid attention even when it didn’t look like it. Like now.

A sign of a good leader. He kept his finger on the pulse of anything to do with his Fury family.

Liz had no doubt that, even with his hair-trigger temper, he would make a great father. He knew first-hand what a bad one was like and she knew he wanted to be nothing like Buck. The same way Judge wanted to be nothing like Ox. The Fury’s sergeant at arms would do everything in his power to be a good dad to Daisy and Ry, and any future children he had with his ol’ lady Cassie. Trip would, too.

Family.

That word was so important. Especially right now.

“I’m just going to rip off the Band-Aid,” Liz murmured, picking at the last remaining corner of nail polish on her middle finger.

Stella’s hand covered hers, stopping Liz’s anxious action. “You’re going to make me nervous if you don’t.”

Liz lifted her head and met her sister’s eyes. Her sister. They looked nothing alike. Liz was blonde, Stella had black hair with blue highlights. Liz’s eyes were brown, Stella’s were blue. Anyone looking at the two of them would never believe they were sisters. Because of that, Stella was the last person she expected to be related to. One of the guys, yes. But the woman across from her, no.

It was also why the results she received earlier this morning were so damn surprising.

Sitting in this kitchen, Liz was now very thankful she never hooked up with Trip. By the time Liz came to the farm that night a couple of years ago, Trip had already taken Stella as his ol’ lady.

“Liz,” Stella whispered, her brow drawn low. “This is about me, right? Not Trip?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

Liz shot a quick glance at Trip, who was busy preparing dinner not even ten feet away. He’d hear everything and he should.

“Okay, hear me out,” she started. Even though Stella might think Liz was saying that to her, she was really saying it to the man working at the counter. “When I heard Trip was resurrecting the Fury, I came here that first night to see what it was about but stayed because… Well, for two reasons, really. One being it was a fun night that turned into something more. The ability to have sex with whoever and whenever, but without judgment, was a huge draw for me.”

When Liz hesitated, Stella nodded, encouraging her to continue. “And the second?”

“Once I turned eighteen, my mother told me a story about an MC she partied with for a few nights after she had just turned eighteen herself. She was a bit wild back then…”

From the corner of her eye, she saw Trip go completely solid. Though, he didn’t turn around.

Stella sat back in her chair with her eyes filled with a mix of concern and worry. “The Fury?”

Liz nodded.

“Did they rape her?” Stella asked softly.

Knowing what she knew about the Originals, it didn’t surprise Liz that was Stella’s first thought. Even Trip tensed, stopped whatever he was doing and turned around.

Liz shook her head and tried to ignore him to concentrate on Stella. “No. She went there willingly with some friends and she told me everything she did those nights, she did willingly. I don’t think she lied about that.”

Trip seemed to relax but only a smidgeon.

Stella frowned. “Okay, then, why is this important now?”

“Because…” Liz took a deep, fortifying breath. “Because she had sex with a bunch of Fury members during her nights partying at the warehouse. One of those nights there was a—”

“Fuckin’ gang bang,” Trip growled, moving away from the counter and approaching them at the table. “Happened all the damn time. At least she wanted to participate, a lot of females didn’t, not that it mattered to any of the Originals. But they were rough either way.”

The thought of them gang-raping women, or even girls, sent a chill down Liz’s spine. She wouldn’t have stuck around the current club if they were still like that. She was thankful they weren’t. That Trip insisted they be and do better.

The Fury president dragged out a chair from the end of the table, spun it around and sat in it backwards. He propped his crossed arms on the chair back. “Keep talkin’.”

She stared at him for a few seconds before turning her attention back to her half-sister. From Stella’s expression, Liz realized the woman was already getting a clue where the story was going, but she remained quiet, letting Liz spell it out.

“I found out this morning that Crazy Pete is… was my father.”

Complete silence filled the kitchen. Trip stared at her, glanced quickly at his wife, then went back to staring at her.

Stella blinked a few times before asking, “Are you sure?”

Liz nodded. “Ninety-nine-point-nine-nine percent.”

Stella’s eyes widened. “You did a DNA test? How?”

Liz rolled her lips under. “It’s the second reason why I became a sweet butt.”

Trip barked, “You fuckin’ took DNA from us without us knowin’?”

Stella grabbed Trip’s forearm and gave it a squeeze. Everyone in the club knew her touch usually helped calm his demons. “Trip, stop. Let her explain.”

“Not from you,” Liz continued, “but Sig. Judge. Dutch. And even Ozzy, to be safe.”

“Anyone you fucked,” Trip concluded, then scrubbed a hand over his mouth.

That statement shouldn’t bother her. It never did in the past since she was never ashamed of her role within the club. For some reason, right now Trip’s words brought heat to her cheeks. “Anyone with blood ties to the Originals.”

“But…” Stella frowned.

“Before I... Before we...” She flapped a hand around, hoping Stella picked up what she was trying to put down without having to spell it out. “And, luckily, you two never invited me to your bed,” Liz squeezed her eyes shut for a second and added, “Thankfully.”

Stella made a noise deep within her throat.

Trip leaned forward over the chair. “So, where the fuck did you get Pete’s DNA? His cut?”

“No, I grabbed some of Stella’s hair from one of Teddy’s combs.”

Stella’s eyes went wide. “On our wedding day?”

Liz nodded. “Yes.”

“So… We’re sisters.”

“Half-sisters,” Trip corrected Stella and surged from his seat. “But what the fuck! You knew this whole fuckin’ time you were the daughter of an Original and never once said a fuckin’ word? I’m more pissed about that than you bein’ Pete’s daughter.” He began to pace the large country kitchen. “You fuckin’ didn’t trust us enough to tell us. You’ve been keepin’ that secret this whole fuckin’ time.”

Secrets were nothing new with the Fury but this was one she figured Trip would be pissed about.

“And what would you have done if you knew, Trip?” Liz asked him.

“Not given you a goddamn cut for Christmas like the rest of the fuckin’ sweet butts, that’s fuckin’ what. For fuck’s sake, if I knew, you never would’ve been a fuckin’ sweet butt from the get-go. Christ!”

“That’s what I figured, you would’ve tried to control me. That’s exactly why I didn’t want anyone to know until I knew for sure who he was.”

Trip paused his pacing and spun to face Liz. “Did Oz know?”

Now she was glad he didn’t, that she never shared that secret with him, even though she had been tempted to many times. But if he had known, he would have been on the receiving end of Trip’s wrath. “No. I kept it from him, too.”

“What if you never found out? What if it was none of us or if it wasn’t Pete? Would you’ve kept it a secret forever?” Trip asked, a flush rising from his chest into his neck and his dark eyes glittering like shards of glass.

“I don’t know. I was hoping I would find out which Original he was, but if I never did… Would it have mattered?”

Trip blinked.

“No, it wouldn’t have,” Stella answered for her ol’ man and also keeping a careful eye on him since he tended to spontaneously combust. “But now that we know,” she blew out a breath, “where do we go from here?”

“I don’t know,” Liz said honestly. “I was hoping we could build a relationship with each other.”

The woman across the table from her frowned. “We already had one.”

“No, Stella, we didn’t. You might not disrespect any of the sweet butts but you certainly don’t befriend them, either. I’m not saying you should have or should in the future. Your status in this club is way above theirs. You are Trip’s queen. But the truth is, I was one of those sweet butts, so while we were cordial, we were never close. I was fine with it because I knew that if I said anything to anyone about why I originally became one…” Her eyes flicked to Trip and then back to Stella in an unspoken message. Stella nodded in understanding. “Truthfully, none of that matters now. That chapter of my life is over and I’m on to a new one.”

“With Crash?” Stella asked, surprised.

“With you as my sister. I would love to get to know you better. Really know you. Spend some time with you. Maybe you could tell me more about Pete. But I’m going to leave that up to you. However, please don’t feel obligated. I’ll understand if you don’t want anything to do with me.”

When she was done talking, silence stretched between them as Stella considered what Liz said.

“Of course, I’d want to get to know you better. You’re family, no matter how you were conceived.” Stella placed a hand to her belly. “You’re going to have a niece you’ll need to get to know, as well.”

Trip huffed sharply.

Stella grinned at his reaction, then sobered quickly. “I know I should be shocked about all of this, but, honestly, I’m not. The way the Originals were, this isn’t surprising at all. I have no doubt there are more children out there who were born to the Originals that we don’t know about.” She gave a dry laugh. “Hell, we could have more siblings ourselves. Unfortunately, the word ‘faithful’ was not in the Originals’ vocabulary.” She tipped her head toward her husband. “Trip and Sig could also have more brothers and sisters than the ones they already have. Hell, I wouldn’t be shocked if the Originals fathered a whole damn army.”

“Wouldn’t surprise me, either,” Trip said. “Keep sayin’ that there’s more out there. Hopin’ more would come forward and join our ranks. But didn’t know we had one hidin’ within our fuckin’ midst like a goddamn spy.”

“I’m sorry I had to go about it like that, but I figured it was the best way.”

“You figured wrong,” Trip stated flatly.

“Trip, I get what she’s sayin’ and why she went about it the way she did. But get over it already. It’s done. Now we know.” Stella turned back to Liz. “Did you only come back to tell me this or are you coming home for good?”

This was where things might get sticky. Especially with how Trip was. He wanted to keep family close, whether Fury family or blood. She didn’t know if it was a Marine instinct, a leader trait, his protective nature or a combination of all three.

“I’m here for a few days… I was hoping it would give us some time to spend together…”

“I have to be at the bar…” Stella started.

“I don’t mind helping you out at the bar while I’m home, if you’re willing. I—”

The lit dynamite finally exploded. “You’re my fuckin’ sister-in-law! You’re Pete’s blood! You’re Stella’s sister! You’re gonna be my son’s aunt! You should own a piece of that goddamn bar!”

Stella’s head spun toward him at that last announcement.

Liz’s hand slapped over her mouth. Own a piece of the bar?

She never considered Trip using the bar as one more excuse to keep her in Manning Grove.

“No!” she said quickly, shaking her head. “No, just because Pete’s swimmer was the winner in a sea of sperm does not mean I deserve a piece of the bar. I would never take that away from Stella. That’s her baby. Her father’s baby. I never even knew him. Never met him. He was a father to her, but never one to me.”

Stella said softly, “He might have been if he had known.”

“Maybe. Maybe not. But my mother thought it was best no one in the Fury knew. Especially since she had no idea which member it was. Even if she knew, she still might have kept it a secret. She said back then… Things were rough.”

Neither Trip or Stella argued that fact. In fact, their expressions said it all. Things could’ve gotten ugly, just like her mother thought. She could’ve ended up dead or badly beaten. And most likely Liz wouldn’t have been born.

The Originals might have made sure of that.

Her mother did what she had to do for her daughter—and her—to survive.

They all did. Every damn one of them.

Back then the Fury was a pit of vipers, striking out at others and even their own. It was their downfall.

She never blamed her mother for not telling her the truth until she was officially an “adult.” Of course, for good reason. Since Liz was older when she found out, she could understand her mother’s actions a lot better.

Her mother was never ashamed of her sexuality or the choices she made. She owned up to what she did and also her mistakes. She passed that way of thinking on to Liz.

“No,” Liz reiterated. “I don’t want a piece of the bar, Trip.” She turned back to Stella. “But I would like to help you out this week to give us more time together. No longer as a sweet butt and the president’s ol’ lady, but as sisters.”

Stella didn’t hide the relief on her face. After Pete died and she came back to Manning Grove to deal with the bar, Stella thought she owned the whole failing business. It turned out she didn’t. She never knew the club had financed it back in the day, taking most of the profits in return. Once the club no longer existed, Pete pocketed the profits for himself. It wasn’t until Trip came home twenty years later and resurrected the Fury that she discovered if it wasn’t for the club, Crazy Pete’s bar would never had existed in the first place.

But now it didn’t matter. Stella was a part of the club, the queen as Trip liked to call her, and benefited whether she owned half the bar or all of it. It was also because of Trip that the bar was pulled from the brink of bankruptcy and ruin.

Liz didn’t realize she was holding her breath until Stella answered, “I’d love that. And I hope you reconsider staying afterward.”

“I…” She shook her head. “I made a promise.”

“To Crash?” Trip asked.

Liz expected another mini-explosion from the man. “I know it’s so soon, but…”

“But?” Trip prodded.

“I think I’m falling in love with him.”

Stella’s dark eyebrows shot up her forehead. “Does he know?”

Liz blew out a soft breath. “No.”

“Are you going to tell him?”

Was she? It was so soon. Things were so new.

But she was also torn about leaving Manning Grove. She wanted to be with Crash, but she also wanted to be with her family.

Even though Shadow Valley was only about four hours away, it was still about four hours away.

If she went back, she wouldn’t be around to help Stella out with the baby. After she went back, she and her sister would need to get to know each other better by phone or text. Or even video calls.

It could work. However, the biggest hurdle would be Trip. He could go either way. Be totally understanding or dig in his heels and be very stubborn.

She’d seen him be both.

He had the power to make things either easy or difficult for her and Stella to forge a relationship.

“Let you go without an issue ‘cause I’ve always said sweet butts could walk away at any time. Durin’ the time you belong to us, we protect you just like everyone else. Unlike with the Originals, the sweet butts are never forced to do somethin’ they don’t wanna. But they’re either in or they’re out. It’s simple. You now bein’ the daughter of an Original and the sister of my wife, shit has changed. You went from Fury property to family. And you know how I feel about family.”

Liz opened her mouth but Trip threw up a palm to stop her and shook his head.

“Ain’t done. The Angels are our ally. Don’t like the idea of you going back to them, but ain’t hatin’ it, either, if that’s what you really want. If Crash is your man, then he’s your man. Ozzy ain’t gonna like that, but Stel is right. He shoulda moved when he had the chance. He didn’t, now it’s too late. Even so, Oz will get over it. If the Angels weren’t an ally, this speech would be a lot fuckin’ different, but…” He paused. “Thinkin’ you bein’ Fury blood and joinin’ the Angels will only strengthen that alliance. So, here’s the thing… Ain’t gonna stop you, but also want you to know you always got a home here if it don’t work out. But listen carefully… If it don’t, askin’ you to leave quietly and not create a shit storm on your way out the door. Don’t want any ripple between the clubs. The Fury, the Angels, the Knights need to remain a strong, united front, you got that?”

She couldn’t say, “Yes,” fast enough, relieved that this wasn’t turning into a fight.

When Trip’s temper wasn’t flaring, the man had a great head on his shoulders. Liz had always respected him for what he’d achieved by rebuilding a club that had been reduced to nothing but ashes and a rusty warehouse. It hadn’t been easy, especially in the beginning when he was the sole member trying to pull it all together.

But thinking about how the Fury rose from those ashes reminded her of Crash’s enormous phoenix tattoo. She’d only been gone for a few hours and she already missed him. Another sign that piece of her heart she’d left behind in Shadow Valley now belonged to him.

“I made a promise to him, but I’ll also make a promise to you both. I’ll definitely come home when the baby is born. I’ll keep my place in Parsington for a while, so Crash and I have somewhere to stay because I don’t think it would be smart to stay at the motel.”

“Good idea.” Stella sighed and assured her, “Ozzy will get over it. Eventually.”

True, but still, this needed to be said… “He never once indicated it was anything more to him than what it was. Not once.”

“‘Cause he’s a stubborn fuck who probably refused to acknowledge it.”

Stella grimaced. “There’s a stubborn streak in all of you.”

She wasn’t exaggerating about that.

“Ain’t gonna argue that,” Trip answered her. “Gonna finish makin’ us grub then head over to help Dodge out so you can stay here and do your sister thing with Liz. Maybe you better give the sisterhood a heads up, too, while you’re at it.”

The sisterhood.

Would they accept her, a former sweet butt that most likely had sex with their ol’ man? If so… Her family would continue expanding at a rapid rate.

She hoped they would, but would understand it completely if they wouldn’t. She also hoped the DAMC sisterhood accepted a former sweet butt among them. Crash said they would and seemed to be so far, but he was a man and women tended to think differently.

The hole in her heart that was left from her mother and stepfather moving out of the country and becoming ex-pats was filling at a quick pace. She realized she needed to decide what to tell her mother. Not only about Crazy Pete and Stella, but about Crash, too.

Luckily, her mother only wanted her to be happy.

And she was.

But she’d still like to make peace with Ozzy before she left.

Out of all the times she’d seen Ozzy with other women, she’d felt zero jealousy. She wouldn’t have been upset if he no longer asked her to be in his bed practically every night. This was how she knew he wasn’t hers.

The other night, when she saw a DAMC sweet butt leaning on Crash and flirting with him before he told her to get lost, it caused a pang of something she never felt or experienced before... jealousy. But it wasn’t a “I’ll scratch your eyes out, bitch, for looking at my man” jealousy, but more of “I’d be hurt if you ever move on to someone else,” pain.

No. Not pain.

Devastation.

He said she was his sunshine, but she realized right then, right there in that kitchen in Manning Grove, her light would truly dim if he ever got tired of her. Or if he realized he made a mistake being with a sweet butt from another club.

Formersweet butt.

If things changed with Crash, she doubted she’d ever go back to being one, not that Trip would ever allow it.

Even so, as much as she loved sex, being with Crash these past weeks showed her that sex with the right person could be so… much… more.

Something Ozzy never could give her, even if he wanted to try.

While her heart was now overflowing with Stella’s acceptance and with finding out she’d be an aunt soon, she left part of her heart in Shadow Valley. So, no, she couldn’t stay here. She would return to the man who waited for her.

She’d keep the promise she made to the man who accepted her as she was. For who she was.

And never judged her once.