Dark Desires by Candace Wondrak

Chapter Nine – Juliet

Will eyed me up as we walked through the halls. “You okay?” A weight lingered in his words, as if he was afraid to say anything more, but I could tell how concerned he was over my meeting with Markus, how long it had lasted… how I’d looked when I’d left the office.

I didn’t exactly have a mirror, but I figured I looked unruffled. How could I not? I mean, with everything Markus had done, why did he affect me so much? And that dream I’d had of him definitely didn’t help things. How was I supposed to look up at him while on his knee, his hand around my throat, and think of things other than my dream?

Yeah, clearly that didn’t work out too well.

Gosh, I was… I felt… I guess I didn’t know what I felt, but I did know one thing, and that was: I wanted to know what it was like. Enough of the guessing, enough of my wandering, curious thoughts. I wanted to know what it felt like, but I couldn’t throw myself at Markus. I had more self-respect than that.

No, I think I knew exactly who should be my first, and even though I kind of felt guilty for thinking it, it wasn’t Will. I didn’t know how long it would be until Markus… you know, though I did think he would. He kept reminding me that I was his, and he’d had me put on birth control. Like, it was more than clear why I’d been placed on those pills.

Did it mean I had to wait around and let him decide for me? No. No, I wouldn’t. I would take charge and do what I wanted, and right now, that included finding one guy in this massive mansion of a house, bringing him to my room, and discovering what it felt like to have naked skin on mine.

I stopped Will when we were on the stairwell, and when he turned those hazel eyes to me, I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty. I liked Will a lot, too much, probably, but this was just one of those things I knew in my gut.

I wanted Jaxon. Jaxon, the one who’d kidnapped me. Jaxon, the one who’d taken my first kiss and then refused me. Jaxon, the one who’d gotten beat up because I wouldn’t take the birth control. Jaxon, Jaxon, Jaxon. The one who’d started to lessen in his coldness to me recently, the one whose lips were now perfectly kissable.

Yes, I wanted my first time to be with Jaxon.

“Could I ask you for a favor?” I started, and Will was all too eager to nod.

“Whatever you want, always.”

“Can you help me find Jaxon? I want to see him.” I would not tell Will why I wanted to see him, but since Will was basically my bodyguard, he might hear it. Or suspect it, at the very least. “And I don’t want you to tell Markus.” What was another secret between the two of us? We already had a few.

Though I could tell Will wanted to ask why, he didn’t. Together, we started scouring the house for Jaxon, hitting all the common areas downstairs first. As we looked, we passed Theo’s office. Bennet sat across from him, his arms folded over his chest, but since the door was open, he heard us walk by. I barely caught sight of him glancing at me as we went, along with Theo.

I… I didn’t know if something was wrong with me or not. When it came to Markus, there was definitely something wrong, but beyond that, I felt a flutter in my heart when I thought about Theo, and Will—I liked them more than I wanted to say.

Was it possible to have feelings for more than one guy at a time? I never really saw girls dating multiple guys on TV, and when they slept with more than one, they were usually the villains of the show or called sluts. Daddy would definitely call me a slut if he knew what I was about to do, but if he knew I felt things for more than one guy… I couldn’t even imagine the things he’d say.

But, I reminded myself, Daddy wasn’t here. He was a liar, a killer. Who was he to judge me and what I did, what I wanted, when he stained his hands in red, just like the men in this house? I loved Daddy, I did, so why couldn’t I have feelings for these guys? It wasn’t as if I could control having the feelings or not. You couldn’t turn them on and off. Sometimes things just were, and since I faced my inevitable death here, why shouldn’t I experience some of the things I wanted to?

Sex. I wanted to have sex. I was old enough to make that decision. If, by some miracle, I lived through this house and went home to Daddy, it might be my only chance for a while, anyway. Daddy would never let me out of the house after this. He might just lock me in my room forever.

And, you know what? I didn’t want that. I didn’t want his lies or his protection.

We found Jaxon as he was leaving the kitchen, a bottle of water in his hands. He looked as though he’d just gotten done working out, sweat lining his brown hair, his skin flushed. He wore a sleeveless shirt, showing off his defined arms. My legs halted the moment I saw him, something in my gut fluttering, almost as if I’d locked a dozen butterflies inside me earlier.

I didn’t, but I suddenly understood the feeling.

His green eyes widened a bit when he saw me, and he ignored Will completely as dimples appeared on his cheeks, along with a grin. “What’s going on? You look like you’re on a mission.”

“I was,” I admitted, keeping my voice low. “To find you.”

Jaxon let out a chuckle. “And why would you want to find me?” He sounded teasing, like he had in the beginning, before things got complicated. Although, I supposed you might say they were complicated from the very start.

He was my kidnapper, after all. My devastatingly cute kidnapper I’d tried to overpower with a Harry Potter book.

“I wanted to see you,” I said. “Are you busy? Can you…” I couldn’t exactly burst out and ask him if he wanted to have sex with me, not with Will standing a foot behind me, watching the whole exchange. “Can we talk?”

“Aren’t we doing that right now?” Jaxon replied, still grinning that boyish, ridiculously cute smile. If there were a dozen butterflies in my stomach before, there were hundreds now. When I did nothing but look awkward, he added, “I’m kidding. Yeah, let’s go.”

It took us a few minutes, but we made it to my room. I almost walked inside with Jaxon, but I stopped to talk to Will, first. After tossing a glance both ways down the hall to make sure no one was nearby, I set a hand on his lower arm, brushing my fingertips against his warm skin.

“Will you let me know if someone’s coming?” I asked, the hope written in my voice.

At first, I couldn’t tell if Will was going to play along further or not. He didn’t seem very eager to aid me in this endeavor, but after he thought about it, he muttered a quiet, “Yes.” He’d never lied to me before, so I hoped he wasn’t lying to me now.

I didn’t want to deal with liars. I wanted to turn a new leaf when it came to those kinds of people.

I gave Will a smile before walking into my room after Jaxon, and as I shut the door, I pushed out any thoughts of any other guy. I could be confused about my feelings later. Right now, I needed to focus on the one in my room.

Jaxon had nearly finished the water bottle already, and his green gaze flicked to the door as he asked, “Are you alright? Did something happen? Did Will—”

“No,” I cut in with a shake of my head. “I’m okay. Will’s fine.” More than fine, really, but I didn’t want to say that.

“Good,” he said. “Then what’s going on? You’re acting… weird.”

“I’m not acting weird,” I blurted out, far too quickly and suspiciously.

He rose a single eyebrow. Jaxon had perfected that look, for he delivered it flawlessly.

“I want—I’ve decided—” I kept pausing, tripping over my words. The last time I’d rushed to kiss him, he’d pushed me off. What if he denied me here? Sure, we’d kissed again recently—a lot—but that was very different than having sex.

As if to further hit the nail on the head, Jaxon muttered as he continued to give me a weird look, “You’re acting very strange, Juliet. Are you sure everything’s okay?”

I opened my mouth to respond, but I realized I’d only keep fumbling over my words like I’d never spoken a complete sentence in my life. So instead, I did something I was pretty dang sure would get the point across.

I started to take off my clothes.

I took off my shirt first, dropping it to the floor. Jaxon watched, his expression slowly changing, and when I reached behind me to take off my bra, the stupid guy turned around, as if to give me privacy.

“Warn a guy before you change, will you?” His voice, though joking, came off much huskier than it did before.

I didn’t say anything to that, not right away. Instead, I kept taking off my clothes, and I only stopped once I stood there naked. Chilly, but naked all the same. Even though I wanted to cover myself, I forced my arms to hang limply at my sides. “I’m not changing.”

Jaxon hesitantly threw a glimpse over his shoulder, and when he saw I stood there naked, bared to him, his eyes widened somewhat. I could tell he waged an internal battle with himself, knowing he should turn around but not wanting to. He settled with facing me, letting his eyes take in every part of me. He looked at me like a starving man would look at his next meal, and it made me blush.

“Juliet…” He could say nothing else, though his fingers did look like he was close to dropping his water bottle to the floor so he could get both his hands on me.

I took a step closer to him, holding my head high even though I wanted to shrink away and not do this. Jaxon wasn’t the only one fighting himself here. “I want,” I started, probably over-emphasizing every single word, “to have sex with you.”

“You…” Again, he trailed off, eyes taking me in for the second time. “You want… no, we can’t. I can’t.” Jaxon took a step away from me, but then that step was made in the opposite direction again, bringing him right back to me. “I want to, but we shouldn’t.” He unscrewed the cap to his water bottle and chugged the rest of it, and then he tossed the bottle and the cap aside. “That was supposed to give me time to think of something to say to convince you this is a bad idea, but I didn’t think of anything.”

“That’s fine,” I told him, “because I wouldn’t have been convinced, anyway.”

Jaxon took a step forward, now standing less than six inches away from me. His hands flexed at his sides, as if he still fought with himself not to touch me. “You,” he breathed out, “will be the death of me, I swear, but the more I look at you, the more I don’t care.”

Funny, because I thought the same thing when it came to him and the others. If I was to meet my end here, let it be a beautiful one.

He let out a long, ragged breath, his hands finding their way to my hips, gripping me firmly. My body was cold due to the no clothes thing, but the moment he touched me, everything inside of me grew warmer. “Are you sure? There’s no going back from this,” he warned.

Nodding, I whispered, “I’m sure.”

Jaxon, ever the wordsmith, finally had nothing else to say. He brought his mouth to mine, kissing me long and hard, the hands on my hips dragging me closer, forcing me to feel the growing hardness between his legs.

His… cock. His dick. I supposed I’d have to get used to thinking those words now, huh? Still kind of felt like dirty words, but that was Daddy talking. I was my own person, and if I wanted to swear or say the word cock, by God, I’d do it.

Jaxon backed us up, never once letting his mouth stray from mine, his fingers digging into my hips with a firmness I couldn’t escape. He stopped only when we stood beside the bed, and I let my hands dip to the bottom of his shirt. We had to stop kissing so I could get it off, and once I did, I let my eyes take him in.

Not the first time I’d seen him shirtless, but the first time I let myself really appreciate how good he looked.

Like, wow. Not overly muscled, but chiseled and defined, smooth and tan, his chest was the most inviting a chest could possibly be. I let my hands explore him, much as I’d done to Will that night, so long ago… only this time, no scars littered this chest. Jaxon’s chest was perfect.

He wore athletic shorts below the waist, and they did nothing to hide the bulge there. Those were the next thing we took off, though I let him do that as I took a step back and sat on the bed. In my head, as I watched him slip off his shoes and get just as naked as I was, the logical side of me screamed danger, danger.

This wouldn’t end well, but I was tired of letting everyone else make decisions for me. Let me decide who I gave myself to. Let me decide who I wanted to kiss. Markus didn’t have to know. I hoped Will would keep this secret for me.

And if, by some happenstance, Markus did find out about this, I would do everything in my power to stop him from needlessly shedding more blood in my name. No more innocent men would die because of me, I swore that to myself, no matter what I had to do.

When Jaxon stood beside the bed, completely nude, I breathed in sharply, feeling a growing heat in my lower half at the sight of him in his full glory. To be honest, cocks kind of looked like aliens to me—I decided that the moment I laid eyes on his—but as veiny and alien-looking as it was, I couldn’t stop my thighs from clenching together in anticipation.

I’d already had orgasms, so what else was there to it? Stick that thing inside me and… move around?

If I sounded awkward, that’s because I was. One hundred percent, totally awkward, but all awkwardness inside me faded the moment Jaxon crawled onto the bed with me, pinning me down with his body.

“You’re beautiful,” he murmured against my ear, his lips finding mine once more. This next kiss blew every kiss we’d shared in the past out of the water. This kiss was the kind of kiss you saw in the fairytales, the kind that could end curses and wake sleeping princesses. He might not be a prince charming, but he certainly knew how to kiss like one.

His hands roamed up my body, stopping at my chest. Palms grazing over my nipples, his fingers found the pebbled things and started to tweak them, running circles around them, pinching them. The sensations made me moan into his mouth, but he didn’t seem to mind.

God, that felt good. You know what else felt good? His body on top of mine, so sure in its movements.

I brought my hands to his sides, running them up and then drawing my fingernails down his back. The action caused him to groan, and I smiled into the kiss. I liked the sounds he could make.

Jaxon’s hands left my chest, moving downward, and I felt him reaching for something between his legs. His cock. I pulled my mouth off his to look, but that only made our foreheads meet in a headbutting motion.

“Relax,” he whispered to me, his voice husky and ragged and more. “Let me take care of you.” As I lay my head down, I felt something slide along me down there, at my apex, and even though I couldn’t see, I knew it was his cock. He rubbed that aching nub of mine with his dick, his hips starting to move as his hand guided the tip.

A thought occurred to me then, as my body lost itself in pleasure and heat. Would it hurt, when he stuck himself inside? And if it did hurt, how long would it hurt? Or was I so aroused I wouldn’t hurt at all? These things I was never taught. Daddy wanted me to be his little girl forever and always and never my own person. Definitely not my own woman with sexual desires of her own.

Heaven forbid.

Jaxon’s mouth found the crook of my neck, and he kissed me there, sucking and nipping with his teeth. He must’ve known exactly where the most sensitive spot was, and I writhed under him as he continued to rub his cock along me.

God, it felt so good. Too good. I didn’t know how the heck I was supposed to handle all of the sensations at once.

Here’s a hint: a lot of sensations at once meant a world-shaking orgasm. I felt my body being pushed to its limits, and I let out a low moan when I recognized the signs of an impending surge of pleasure inside me. When I came, I tried to stifle my cry, but a sound still escaped me. Jaxon didn’t seem to mind at all.

Through the bliss that was the orgasm, I felt the movements at my apex shift; the tip of Jaxon’s cock no longer rubbed against me. Instead, it dipped lower, pushing against a part of me that had never felt more alive than it did right now.

Jaxon stopped showering my neck with affection, and though my eyes were closed, I could hear his ragged, heavy breathing. My thighs were open, his tip prodding against me, my entrance, and then… then his hips bore down and he pushed inside of me.

It hurt a little, but I didn’t know if it was true pain or if it was only because I’d never felt anything down there before. Only a hand, nothing inside. A whimper of a sound left my lips, and Jaxon cooed into my ear, coaxing me, telling me it was all right. He’d take care of me. He would.

I had no idea how deep his cock was inside of me, but it felt like I was as full as I could be. My eyelids opened just a hair, and I saw Jaxon’s face hovering above mine. Pupils dilated, the green color of his gaze full of hunger and lust and everything that made those butterflies in my gut soar. I felt like a different person. I felt… complete.

Would I feel the same if it was Markus above me? Or Will? Or even Theo?

Jaxon began to rock his hips, taking on a slow rhythm as he pumped his cock in and out of me. I could do nothing but lay there and take it, reveling in the feeling, the pleasure taking hold inside of me as the pain faded away into nothingness, forgotten as the seconds turned into minutes.

Had I lost my mind? Did it even matter?

A low, manly groan left Jaxon, a sound echoing in his lungs. “Fuck,” he whispered, his voice a timbre I’d never heard before. His head dipped low, his forehead leaning against mine as he jerked his hips, shoving his cock further inside of me, filling up my core and then some. “You feel so good.” It was all he could say, it seemed, for another sound left him right then, and this one I felt in my soul.

I breathed out, my body rocking on the bed with each thrust of his hips. Jaxon did not take on a crazy pace, he didn’t lose himself and go wild, go at me so hard and so fast it hurt. No, he was gentle, caring. He was everything I could’ve asked him to be and more. So, so much more.

I didn’t know how long it was, how long it took Jaxon to reach his own climax, and I was too focused on what it felt like to have a cock inside of me and a body above mine to pay much attention to the way his breathing shifted, to how his muscles spasmed or his eyelids slammed shut. By the time I felt him jerk into me a few levels below roughly, he’d had whipped his hips back, pulled out of me, and spilled himself onto my lower belly.

Hot, white and sticky; I knew what it was, even if I’d never seen it before. I also knew that stuff could’ve been sprayed inside of me since I was now diligently taking that birth control, but I didn’t say anything, instead simply staring at Jaxon as he rolled onto his side next to me, breathing hard.

“Shit,” Jaxon breathed out, turning his head to look at me. If he was flushed before, if he was covered in sweat from his earlier workout, it was tenfold now. Every part of him was red and slick with sweat, new beads dripping along his hairline. His lips curled into a dimpled smile. “You’re trouble, Juliet. Sweet, sweet trouble.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.” As I spoke, I couldn’t help but have the urge to get something to wipe myself off. Thankfully, Jaxon must’ve had the same idea, for he rolled off the bed, grabbing something of his from the floor to clean the white stuff off my body.

After I was cleaned off, he ran a hand along his clean-shaven jaw, shaking his head slowly as he stared at me. “If Markus finds out, I’m dead. He was very clear no one was supposed to touch you.”

I propped myself up, thankfully not as self-conscious about my naked body as I was before all this. Still wanted to roll beneath the blankets, but I managed to stop myself, mostly because I was busy eyeing Jaxon up as he started to put his clothes back on. “Why? He was the one who put me on the pill.”

“Yes, but I don’t think that was for my benefit,” he said. His cock was still semi-hard, even as he stuffed it away behind his shorts.

“Then what—” I stopped myself. It went back to what I was thinking about before.

Jaxon gave me a look, and then, once he was fully clothed, he moved to sit on the edge of my bed. “He doesn’t want anyone else to have you, and I can only think of one reason for that.” He ground his jaw, as if he didn’t particularly enjoy the thought of the next thing he said. “He wants you. He wants you all to himself.”

“And what if I don’t want that?” Not that I didn’t find Markus attractive and handsome, but for a man to say I was his and his alone in spite of any feelings residing inside me… it didn’t feel quite right. Like it wasn’t fair.

Markus had told me already, countless of times, that I was his in every single way. But that didn’t mean he wanted me, did it? Although, it would go hand in hand with what Theo had told me before.

Me. It was always about me.

But again, I still didn’t think I was special enough to merit a man like Markus’s attention.

“As much as I wish things were different, if that’s what Markus wants, you don’t have a choice,” Jaxon broke his silence, bringing me back to reality. He reached for me, running a hand along my face. The gesture caused my heart to skip a beat or two. “Have I mentioned how sorry I am lately that I brought you here?”

“Not in the last twenty-four hours, no.”

“I am. If it weren’t for me… well, realistically, if it weren’t for me, he would’ve sent someone else to grab you, and I don’t think they would’ve been as nice about it as me, but still,” Jaxon started to ramble, which led me to smile.

I finally sat up fully, gathering the blankets around me to cover me somewhat. “It isn’t like you took me from a normal life. I… I know there are awful things that go on in this house. I know what you do here, but I think I feel less like a prisoner here than I did in my own house. Is that wrong?”

“Here,” he spoke, “right and wrong don’t exist. I learned that growing up, and you’ll learn it, too. You’ll either grow numb to the things you see here, to what Markus does… or you’ll wake up one day and realize you kind of enjoy it. I’m not sorry for taking you away from your father—he sounds like a grade A asshole—but I am sorry for that. I don’t want this place to change you.”

“It won’t.”

Jaxon gave me a smile in return, but he said nothing. Even I felt odd after that, and as I got off the bed and started to get dressed, I knew, deep down, we both knew I was lying. Living here, with these men… it would change anyone, and not necessarily for the better.

The days started to blend in together, but I got a routine. I spent some time with Tori when she wasn’t in school or doing homework, when she could weasel her way out of doing what her mother wanted—which was to leave me be. Stella apparently didn’t want Tori hanging around me, maybe because Markus still had so much interest in me. We played a lot of Mario Kart together, had a few more swimming lessons. I was getting better at both, slowly but surely.

I didn’t see much of Markus after the video chat with Daddy, but that was okay. Mostly because I needed time to sort out my own feelings. Feelings that were growing even more confused as the days progressed, furthered by the vivid dreams I had each night.

Odd, I knew, because before this house, I’d only dreamed of the night I first met Markus Scott. But now, now I dreamed of a kitchen that was familiar to me, but one that wasn’t from the house I’d grown up in. I dreamed of Daddy watching as the various men of this house took me, defiled me—to use Daddy’s own words. I dreamed of bodies on top of me, making me forget any sane thought.

No, everything grew more complicated as the days went on.

It was one day in the late morning, after Will had dropped me off at Theo’s office, when I learned today would be a special day indeed.

Theo was up and about when I walked in, and he held onto a set of car keys. The moment I saw those silver things, I couldn’t help but freeze. My eyes widened of their own accord, and I knew it was almost too much to hope for.

There was a whole world outside this house, a world I knew next to nothing of. I’d love to see it, even if I only saw parts of it.

“Ah, there you are,” Theo spoke, giving me a warm smile. Thankfully, my attention was too focused on the keys in his hand to see the caring look in his eyes—maybe I was crazy, but I swore Theo knew that I’d had sex, and he knew I was no longer a virgin.

Then again, I could swear that every person I came in contact with in this house knew, even Tori. Which was ridiculous, because she was ten years old.

Yeah, probably all in my head, but still.

“What’s going on?” I asked, not bothering to try to hide my confusion.

“You and I are, uh, going out on the town,” he spoke. “Which is to say, Markus told me to grab a few things, and since you’ve been good, you can come. Now, I know what you’re probably thinking—” I highly doubted that. “—but please don’t try to run. I really don’t want Markus to turn his ire on me.”

No, the last thing I was thinking about right now was to run while Theo and I were out and about. I was actually wondering what the catch was, for surely there had to be one.

“And, who knows? Maybe if you can prove he can trust you out there, he’ll let you out of here more often.” Theo took a step towards me, amber eyes flashing with concern as he asked, “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

All I could do was nod.

“Good, then let’s both be on our best behavior today, shall we?” Theo’s lips sluggishly curled into a smile, and I could not fight the giddiness rising inside me.

This. Day. Was. Awesome.

We left right after that. It felt strange to walk through the house with Theo, to head into the garage with him—a place I’d never been before now. The Scotts had cars aplenty, all shiny and new and definitely expensive. I had no idea what they were, but even I knew they were not the kind of cars you saw on the road often.

And, of course, they were all black, as was the Scott way. Black clothes, black cars, black souls. Everything and anything that could be black would be black when it came to this household.

I could not hide my excitement as Theo led me to one of the cars. He opened the passenger door for me with a gentle smile, and I returned it with gusto, beaming. How could I not? I never thought this day would come. Maybe it was a dream and I just didn’t realize it; I’d wake up in a few moments and wish I could’ve slept a while longer.

To go out in the world, even if it was just to run some errands with Theo… I never thought I’d see the day. Never believed Markus would ever let me out of that house—not alive, anyway. If this wasn’t a dream—and I was half tempted to ask Theo to pinch me just to make sure it wasn’t—it gave me hope that, someday, I might no longer be a prisoner here.

Maybe Markus could let me go.

Or maybe this was him showing me, through actions, what life could be like if I was good, if I listened to him and didn’t try to run again. Would this little jaunt out of the house be enough of a bribe?

I wanted to say no, but honestly, the outside world was always something I’d wanted, deep down, even when I tried to convince myself Daddy was right. Even when he told me time and time again that the world and the people in it only wanted to hurt me, it was hard not to feel trapped.

But, I supposed, it’s because I was trapped. Daddy, as much as I loved him and believed he thought he was doing right by me, was a liar. A liar who worked for the Scotts, for Markus. I couldn’t forget that. Though it hurt me to think, every word out of his mouth might’ve been a lie.

And that wasn’t something I wanted to think about right now.

As Theo pulled the car out of the garage and to the gate, where he hit something on the visor near his head to open the metal gate—the same one I’d tried to climb and failed—he kept tossing glances in my direction. I was too busy looking at the world around us to pay much attention to him, although I did hear his question: “Excited?”

How could I not be excited? How could I be out here, not with Daddy, not tied and kidnapped in the back of a car, and not be excited? It felt like forever ago when Jaxon had brought me here, when I’d huffed and puffed from the backseat, annoyed and furious that he’d taken me.

Of course I was excited. I was beyond excited, but I settled for saying, “Yeah.”

The streets we drove on, the roads we passed, none were familiar to me, so I didn’t bother trying to tell where we were or which way we were going. Running was the last thought in my head as I stared out of the window.

The Scott residence must be on the outer portion of the city. They must own a lot of land, for it was a long time before we started passing other huge mansions. Their yards were not nearly as large, nor were their outsides quite as impressive. The Scotts really were a cut above the rest, when it came to everything.

Eventually, we turned onto a road that appeared to head further into the city, and we started passing restaurants and grocery stores. Even though everything looked rich and fancy, it still felt like home. Like I was meant to see all this, to be here. We passed people driving, people walking on the sidewalks, chitchatting. Women with bonnets and dresses with flower designs. We even passed a school, Midpark High, that looked like something out of a television show. High and imposing walls, giant windows, a campus so clean you couldn’t see a speck of filth or trash anywhere.

Most of Midpark was like that, actually, which was quite deceiving in reality.

Though it was the last thing I wanted to do, I turned away from the window, away from the outside world, and looked at Theo. Busy driving, but he kept tossing glimpses to me still. Maybe I was acting silly or something.

“What do you have to get?” I asked.

“There is one thing, in particular, Markus sent me out for.” He hit the turning signal of the car, and we slowed down to pull off the road and into a parking lot. Theo did not say anything more as he parked the car, and together, we both got out.

We stood before a small building. Not many other cars were in the lot near us, and I let my eyes roam the area. The building was a shop, a boutique, whatever that meant, and as we headed for its front door, I saw the displays in the windows. Mannequins wearing what I would call hideous clothing were perched and arranged.

Did we come here for clothes? I wondered. I didn’t see any male mannequins, so my curiosity was definitely peaked.

When we walked in, a woman standing behind a counter approached us. An older woman, maybe near Daddy’s age. Her blonde hair was curled, highlighted to an almost white hue. The curls bounced with each step she took, and she stopped when she greeted us, “Hello there. Anything I can help you with today?”

Theo took the lead, thank goodness. “Can you point us to where your sleepwear is?”

The woman did one better than that, taking us through the boutique, to the back corner. “Here we are,” she said. “Anything in particular you’re looking for?”

“Just browsing for now, thank you.” Theo gave her a smile, which the woman seemed to enjoy quite a bit, for as she left us to look over their selection, she walked away with more sway to her hips… even though I was pretty sure I spotted a wedding ring on her left hand.

Maybe that was a normal interaction between strangers in the outside world, or maybe it’d been laced with flirting. I guess I wouldn’t really know, but I did know I didn’t really like the thought of Theo flirting with anyone.

I know, stupid, considering everything, but I just couldn’t help it.

I moved beside him, eyes dropping to his hands as he started to peruse the racks. “What are you looking for? I can help.” My thought process: if I helped, we would get out of here sooner, which meant less time for the worker woman to eye Theo up like he was a piece of candy and she had the biggest sweet tooth—which she was currently in the process of doing near the front.

Yeah, she wasn’t so secretive in her glances, nor were those glances quick. They lingered.

“I will let you know once I need your help,” Theo told me. “For now, why don’t you just take a look around and see if there’s anything you like? I know you have clothes already, but if there’s something you love, I’m sure Markus won’t mind getting it for you.”

Hmm. It almost sounded like this shopping trip was for me, but that couldn’t be, could it?

I didn’t find anything I really liked in this store. Everything seemed like it was meant for the hoity-toity of society, which clearly was not me, the girl who’d been stuck in her house practically since she was born, or for older women who wanted to have a certain… look, let’s just say.

Theo and I walked out of that store with nothing, though it was not the only place we visited.

Shops were aplenty in Midpark, although none of them were my kind of style. In each one, Theo asked to see their sleepwear—I found it kind of funny that he wouldn’t just say pajamas. I guess sleepwear sounded more eloquent and less childish, but whatever.

I paid no attention to the time while we were out, instead choosing to enjoy simply being free, at least to some extent. The outside world was bigger than I could even comprehend; I knew it exceeded the confines of Midpark and the house I’d grown up in, but I guess it didn’t really hit me until I drove around town with Theo.

And, what was stranger, beside the women who giggled and batted their eyelashes at anything Theo said as we went from store to store, no one was outright mean. No one was rude, no one gave off vibes of danger. In fact, everyone seemed nice, which led me to think not everyone out there wanted to hurt you. Some people, sure, but not everyone.

The things Daddy had told me, the things he’d said as I’d grown up, made me think you couldn’t trust anyone, but that was wrong. It was all very, very wrong, and I felt almost as if my life had been stolen from me.

What would things have been like if Daddy hadn’t kept me locked up? If he was normal, and I was by extension?

After each store, Theo texted Markus an update, probably letting him know I hadn’t run off or disappeared. We even stopped at this cute little diner that looked as though it was completely out of date—only on purpose. Theo called it retro, fifties-style. The floor tiles were checkered, the booths made of red leather, windows lining the entire front of the place. Bar stools sat near the counter, and you could practically see straight through into the kitchen, where they cooked their food.

We sat in the farthest booth, and I was overwhelmed just by glancing at the menu. So many things. No, wait. So many choices that I didn’t know what they were. Sometimes Daddy got takeout, but mostly we ate whatever he cooked, and when he was gone, I had to fend for myself. Sandwiches were usually what I decided on.

So Theo ordered for me when the waitress came back, “We’ll do two orders of the chicken tenders and fries.” Our drinks already sat before us: bubbling brown pop. When she left, he smiled at me. “Chicken’s always a safe bet, and their fries are really good.”

“Do you eat here a lot?” We sat across from each other, but the booths were not that wide; every so often my foot grazed his ankle, my knee brushed up against his. Had to be careful, otherwise my mind might start to get other ideas…

Ideas that involved wondering what Theo looked like when he wasn’t trying to be a proper doctor, when he didn’t have his shirt perfectly buttoned and tucked into his pants. Did he ever get unruffled? Did he ever get wild? Memories of that day in his office, when he’d held me close, grazed his thumb over my lip, surfaced in my head, which led me to think other things.

What would Theo look like in the dark, his body covered in sweat, above mine?

No, no, no. I shouldn’t let myself think of those things, but with each stolen touch under the table, it grew harder and harder not to.

“Not too often now, but I did a lot growing up. My dad was always working late, or he just made excuses not to be home. With the Scotts, you never know.” Theo shrugged. “My mom and I would come here every Tuesday, and I’d always get the same thing—”

“The chicken and fries?” I spoke with a smile.

His smile only widened, and I felt my gut twist. “How’d you know?”

“A lucky guess.”

Theo’s smile faded as he went on, “When he retired from his position at the house, I’d already gone through med school and all that, on the Scott’s dollar. My parents both moved out of Midpark shortly after that. I still have their house, but I don’t go to it that often.”

“Why not? It’s a place away from that house.” AKA a place away from the Scotts and all of the mayhem and murder they wreaked.

His shoulders went up and down once. “I don’t know. I used to, but not so much anymore. I think the last time I did was when Jaxon brought you to the house. I knew you weren’t like any of them, so maybe it was a way to make sure you were okay—although it isn’t like I’m a part of the family. I still like to think Markus listens to my advice, sometimes.” He chuckled.

Personally, I couldn’t imagine Markus listening to anyone’s advice. He seemed like the kind of man who thought he knew best. His way or the highway, or whatever the saying was. Markus the inflexible, the unswayable.

“Besides, it’s not like I have anyone to go home to,” Theo hurriedly added, breaking eye contact with me as he glanced to his right, out of the windows beside us.

“You could, if you wanted,” I spoke, feeling more than awkward as I said it. Theo looked back to me, an expression in his amber eyes I couldn’t describe, so I plowed on, “I mean, I think you could. All the women today seemed to like you a lot, even the ones wearing rings—”

He flashed a toothy grin. “Oh, that’s just because marriage means nothing to any of these people. Midpark is… not like any other city out there. It might look shiny and new, but it’s just like the Scott house. The shiny outside hides the evil.”

Eyebrows creasing, I muttered, “Those women didn’t seem evil. They just seemed to like you.” Did I sound jealous? I couldn’t tell, but I really hoped not.

“Affairs are very low on the list of sins this city has,” he told me. “And, anyway, those women aren’t my type—not that I have a type. I mean, maybe I do, but I never really thought about it.” If I didn’t know any better, I’d say Theo rambled, kind of like what I did when I was in an uncomfortable situation.

Did I… did I make him uncomfortable?

Theo rubbed the back of his neck, looking away from me and causing me to say, “Well, for what it’s worth, I think you’re a good man, and I think you should be happy. I don’t think your entire life should be all about the Scotts.”

Those amber eyes met my stare, holding them as he whispered, “And I think the same of you, Juliet. I want you to have a life after this, and I’m doing everything in my power to make sure you get it.” A weight hid behind his words, and even though I didn’t quite know how to respond to him, I gave him a smile.

Thankfully, since it was an odd time of the day, the diner wasn’t that busy, so our food came out shortly after that. No more deep conversations, at least for now. It did give me some food for thought, though.

As our shopping trip winded down, our last destination proved fruitful. At a mall outside of Midpark, in a store that specialized in everything pink and girly. I loved it so much, loved each and every thing they had on the shelves. I could easily spend the rest of the day in there, but we were here for something else.

Something that was, I slowly realized, for me.

I was in the next aisle over when Theo pulled something off the rack. He moved around to the end of the aisle and held it up for me. “What do you think of this?”

I didn’t expect to look over and actually like what he held up, nor did I anticipate the bubbling feeling inside me, the way my heart, confused as it was, skipped a beat. I took in the pajama set he offered to me for appraisal and said, “It’s… it’s nice.”

It was more than nice, really. It was a bright pink, fuzzy fabric with various unicorns on it. It was reminiscent of my old pajama set, before it’d gotten stained with blood and tossed out.

“Just nice?” Theo echoed, a grin slow to spread on his cute face. “If that’s all it is, then I’ll put it back—”

“No,” I said, lunging for him. He froze, letting me take the hanger out of his hand and bring it closer to me so I could inspect it. The unicorns were more cartoonish, but still adorable. As I clutched the pajama set to my chest, I met his eyes. “What is this? Don’t tell me we were looking for this all along?”

His response told me more than words ever could: he shrugged.

Theo shrugged, as if it meant nothing. As if we’d spent the last few hours in search of nothing in particular and we’d just happened to stumble across this. I didn’t know why the thought didn’t occur to me before; he’d told me we were running errands, but in all the stores we’d been to, we’d not bought one thing.

“Theo,” I started.

“Do you think they’ll fit? There’s a fitting room in the back, I think, though from what it looked like, it’s just a curtain, but I can stand watch—”

“They’ll fit,” I cut in, not blinking as I stared at him. How could I? This was all a ruse to get me pajamas to replace the pair Markus had ruined in his rage… how was I supposed to feel after that? What was I supposed to think?

Why… why did it matter to anyone?

“Good,” Theo said, lifting the hanger from my hand. “Now, anything else you’d like before we check out?”

I had no idea if this was all Theo’s doing or if Markus had indeed sent us out for this, but I leaned towards Theo. After all, at the diner he’d told me he was trying to look out for me, and even though he couldn’t stop Markus from being Markus, knowing he was there for me filled me with contentment. I liked the idea of Theo being there, watching over me from afar. He might not be perfect, but he was as close to a white knight as a man could be while employed with the Scotts.

Maybe… maybe Daddy wasn’t so bad after all, then. If Theo could be a good man while working for Markus, maybe Daddy could be, too.

Or maybe my mind grasped at straws.