Hellbent Hero by Naomi Porter

9

Tara

I PACED IN my living room, waiting for Storm and his cronies to leave. “Who the hell does he think he is, treating me that way? Fucking caveman!”

Madeline would be furious if she knew. She’d chew him out. Maybe kick him out of their bed. Yeah, that’d piss him off and show him to never fuck with me.

I smiled deviously and called her. Misery loves company, right?

Mads answered on the first ring. “Hey, babe! How are you?” Her pleasant voice instantly deflated my rage. Crunching filtered through the earpiece, and it made me curious what she was eating.

“Am I interrupting your supper?” I wasn’t sure why but I dialed back my intent to get Storm in trouble with her.

She laughed and crunched some more. “Not at all. I’m munching on ham and pickle wraps. I can’t get enough of them. I’m waiting for Storm to get home to have supper together.”

I dug my nails into the back of my head. Storm, the asshole, had probably told my bestie when and what she could eat. He was a domineering pig like that.

Stop being a bitch. You’re just hurting and taking it out on Storm. You’re just jealous at how much he worships Maddy.

I hated when my conscience was right.

“The kind of wraps with cream cheese?”

“Mhm.” She chewed loudly into the phone as if tempting me. “Your favorite. Tina made up a tray if you’d like to come by and gorge yourself on them.”

Yup, she was teasing me.

“I can’t. I got a new kitten today, so I can’t leave her alone.”

Maddy squealed into the phone. “You got a kitten? Oh my goodness! Send me pics. What’d you name her?”

I smiled at the genuine delight in her voice. “Luna. She’s six weeks old, gray and white.” I lifted my baby into my arms and kissed her head, suddenly feeling calmer. “She’s adorable.”

“Luna? How stinkin’ precious. Bring her over! Please, Tara. I want to cuddle her.”

My grin grew. “Well—” I hissed in pain as Luna’s claws dug into the burn on my stomach.

“Are you okay? What happened?”

“Nothing… nothing. Luna scratched me, that’s all.” I set the furball next to me and lifted up my shirt to investigate the damage. Her razor-sharp nails had poked through my cotton shirt. My wound was bleeding so I put the phone on speaker to remove my top.

“Aww, I’m sure she didn’t mean to.”

I reached for a tissue on the end table. “No, she didn’t.” I dabbed the blood, regretting what I’d done to myself. I should’ve called Maddy before I pulled out the lighter and cigarette. Dammit, all to hell. Why hadn’t I called her?

“Is it bad? Break any skin. If so, you need to clean it really well. You don’t want to get that cat-scratch disease or an infection.”

“Is that a real thing? Cat-scratch disease?” I should have bought a book on raising a kitten.

“Yes, it’s real.”

“I’ll wash it and keep an eye out for infection.”

“So you got a kitten today. Did you do anything else after you left school?”

“Like what, Maddy? Is there something you want to ask me?” Because I knew her all too well, I prepared for the question I wanted to avoid.

“You went to see him, didn’t you?”

I rolled my eyes at the confidence in her tone. “Yes.”

“And?”

“And nothing to report. I told him I wanted nothing to do with him.” Well, after he told me he didn’t want to be with me and would never love another woman. Maddy didn’t need to hear that part. It’d only make her sad and me look pathetic.

“You what?”

“Don’t sound so surprised. I might’ve lost my head over Hero after the whole Hunters debacle, but I’m over it. Back to being myself.” My lonely, unlovable self. “I don’t do relationships, remember? That’s you, Mads.”

Men only hurt me.

“Don’t talk like that. I know you want a family.”

I do. I want one with Hero, but he will never love me. Told me so himself.

If I told Maddy that, I’d sound even more pitiful.

“Luna is my first baby. I don’t need a man to be happy.”

“You’re right. You don’t. But the right man will add to your life in wonderful ways. Beyond sex. I’m talking about emotional intimacy, friendship, and support.”

“Love isn’t for everyone. Some of us will remain single our whole lives. It’s not a bad thing, you know. I’m happy, Mads.” I was also a liar. If she was here, she’d see I was lying through my teeth because apparently, according to Maddy, my eyes revealed the truth.

She sighed into the phone. “I only want you to be happy. No one needs to have another person to enjoy life and be fulfilled. I just thought… Well, I thought you’d fallen for Hero.”

I snorted as if she was ridiculous for thinking such a thing. “Sorry to disappoint you.”

“Don’t get snarky with me. I’m over the top hormonal and you’ll make me cry.”

My chest tightened. The baby wasn’t the reason for her hormones. Well, not entirely. Madeline had been highly emotional since the kidnapping. It didn’t take much for tears to spring from her eyes. She hated it. Hated to show weakness. A trauma like what she’d been through left side effects beyond her control.

Madeline might look sweet and innocent… like an angel. But my girl was stronger than me. I’d seen her strength first-hand many times while dealing with her abusive ex. And more recently, when she’d sacrificed herself to protect the rest of us. Maddy was a fighter, relentless at giving into her emotions and fears, refusing to let the Hunters and that fucking Miller take anymore from her. The abject humiliation and abuse she endured would’ve broken me beyond repair, yet here Mads was persevering on. Not letting anything stop her from living, loving, and blissed-out happiness.

I wished I was more like her.

“Fine,” I muttered just to sass her, but really, it was to keep her from dialing into my own torment. I lifted myself off the sofa and took the phone into the kitchen, where I kept the first aid kit.

“Hey, wanna go out this weekend? Get some of our teacher friends together for karaoke. It’ll be fun. You can sing.”

I laughed, shaking my head, washing my burn at the kitchen sink. I squeezed my eyes shut to fight the urge to cry. My stupid wound stung like I was burning myself all over again. “Storm will let you go out?” Not likely.

“Sure. Why wouldn’t he?”

“Mads, you’re not stupid. He won’t let you out of his sight.”

He was the most overprotective man I’d ever seen. What I wouldn’t do to find a guy like him.

“I’m out of his sight right now.”

I burst out laughing. “You’re on a compound with electric fencing surrounding it, an armed guard at the gate, and I imagine several bikers in the clubhouse who are also packing. Girl, you’re protected to the hilt.”

“Whatever. I’ll ask him. He won’t be here Saturday since Boxer and Ire are fighting. I need something to do.”

“Ooh, that’s right! I’ve always wanted to go to an underground fight. Can we go too?”

“Seriously? Why would you want to watch two men beat the crap out of each other?”

I held my breath as I dotted a cotton ball on the burn. I nearly crumpled onto the floor. God, how could I do this to myself?

Weak in the knees, I leaned against the counter and refocused my attention on Maddy. “For the experience, of course.”

“Girl, I couldn’t stomach it.”

“No, I suppose you couldn’t. A sleazy joint like that is no place for a little lady in your condition.” Weirdly, I felt a lot better. These emotional ups and downs were ridiculous. Sporadic and bipolar. Maddy always could brighten my day with her effervescent light.

“I’ll ask Storm. If he says yes, it’s safe to assume we’ll have a posse of bikers protecting us at The Bullet.” She giggled, then I heard the crunch of a pickle.

“Sounds good. I need to get going. Luna needs me.” Sort of. More like I needed to get my shit together for school tomorrow.

“Okay. See you in the morning. I’ll bring you some pickle wraps.”

“Mmm, I look forward to them. Bye, babe.”

“Bye!” She ended the call.

I blew out a breath as I used my hand to fan my blistering burn. I might as well check my inner thigh too. I carefully peeled off my leggings, then removed the bandage. It was all bubbly. I wanted to pop the tiny beads but knew I shouldn’t.

Now that I was calm, I regretted burning myself. And making a freaking H on my inner thigh at that. What in the actual fuck, Tara? I hardly even recalled doing it.

If I didn’t get myself back on track, I might destroy all that I’d built. With that thought, I dialed Dr. Kelly’s office to make an emergency appointment.

One step at a time. Put one foot in front of the other… You can do this. Don’t break.