The First Rule by Nicole S. Goodin

7

Darcy

“You know what?I never thought I’d see the day you moved into a house with your sexy, forbidden lover, as knocked up as the day is long.” Steph flashes a devilish grin.

I should ignore her. I know she’s only trying to bait me, but biting my tongue isn’t really one of my strengths, so naturally I snap back.

“First of all, he’s not my lover, and secondly, I’m not moving in with him… I’m just staying with him until I get my shit together.”

She raises a brow at me as she tosses the last of my boxes into the back of her boyfriend Mark’s truck. “Whatever you say, sweetie. I’ve got twenty bucks that says you live happily ever after.”

“Stop it.” I roll my eyes.

She’s been at it all week, ever since I told her and Freya that I’d accepted Ryan’s invitation to come and stay with him.

It was more of an instruction than it was an invitation to be fair, but given how incredibly indecisive I’ve been feeling lately, him giving me no room to overthink it was probably a blessing.

“You should go for it. Ryan is ridiculously hot.”

I just shake my head at her. I really don’t need to be reminded about the sex appeal of Ryan Steele – it’s glaringly obvious. I’m pregnant, not blind.

“Is he bad in bed? Is that the problem?”

“God no.” The words are out without me even having time to filter them, or the wistful tone in which I deliver them.

Steph smiles triumphantly. “I knew he wouldn’t be. Spill.”

I want to tell her to shut up – that there’s no way I’m talking about this with anyone, but part of me has been dying to share something from that night. I want to gush over all the details with a girlfriend like I would if it was just some guy that I’d had incredibly hot sex with – so I do. I spill it all.

“I keep getting flashes, Steph. The look in his eyes when he was deep inside me… the feel of his hands on my skin. That wasn’t a business transaction, and it certainly wasn’t drunk, sloppy sex… it was… there aren’t words.”

Steph – the woman who barely stops talking long enough to take a breath seems lost for something to say. I’m a little pleased with myself.

“I’ve got to ask...” she finally says, “do the piercings… you know… extend below the collar?”

I hold back a groan. That nipple piercing was so hot. I never thought piercings were something I’d be into, but I was wrong. So very, very wrong. I don’t even have to say anything, my reaction is answer enough.

“But it can never happen again,” I say as I round the back of the ute and open the door.

“Um, like hell it can’t.” She follows me and pushes the door shut so I can’t climb in.

I scowl at her.

“Don’t punish yourself. Have all the hot, tattooed, pierced sex.” She almost begs.

“I think you’re forgetting that Ryan is Jacob’s twin. You remember Jacob, right? The man I was engaged to marry?”

She waves away the idea with a flick of her hand. “Jacob is a complete dickhead who never deserved you in the first place.”

I want to agree with her, because she’s not entirely wrong, but my mind flashes to the tattoo on my hip… to the first night Jacob and I met… to random events from over the past five years, and I can’t do it – I can’t agree with her.

Jacob has two sides, I may not have got to see his softer side anywhere near as much as I’d have liked to, but it was there. There was a part of him that deserved me. I can’t deny that. It wasn’t all bad between us.

I shrug a shoulder in response.

She gives me a stern look and re-opens the car door for me.

We drive over to Ryan’s without any conversation required on my part. Steph is going on and on about something that happened at work that turned into a scandal between two of her workmates, followed by a very descriptive mental picture of them being caught in the copy room.

I’m only half listening, instead watching her with amusement. She looks ridiculous driving this big vehicle. Mark is huge, and Steph is anything but.

“Next street on the left.” I interrupt her rambling as the GPS shows me the way to Ryan’s.

I glance around at the houses we’re passing and notice for the first time that we’re in a really expensive neighbourhood. I’d never given too much thought to where Ryan might live, or how well off he is financially now that he’s not part of the filthy rich, family business.

Money never seemed to be his priority over the years I’ve known him. He wouldn’t have walked away from his inheritance the way he did if he was all about money but judging by the size and quality of homes in this area, he isn’t doing too badly for himself despite that.

“Lover boy is loaded too, huh?” Steph asks as she dips her head to take in a huge three-storey house as we pass it by.

“It’s number thirty-seven,” I say, ignoring her comment.

She drives farther down the street and comes to a stop outside a slightly more modest-looking house. It’s still very nice, and I bet it cost an arm and a leg to buy, but it’s by far the least extravagant on the entire street.

I can’t quite place my reasoning for the thought, but I’m relieved it’s not some giant mansion.

We pull into the drive and no sooner that Steph has killed the engine, Ryan appears out of the front door, a wide smile on his handsome face.

A sigh slips through my lips without permission.

“I agree, mmm, mmm, mmm,” Steph teases smugly, climbing out of her door before I have a chance to argue with her assumption.

I close my eyes for a minute and take a deep breath. I’m here. I’m really doing this. It’s going to be fine.

I can do this.

I hear my door open and feel the cool air on my skin. My lids flash open.

“You planning to get out of there anytime soon?” Ryan asks, his tone amused.

I take in every inch of him from his dishevelled hair to his bare feet.

Shit.

Shit, shit, shit.

He looks all kinds of handsome dressed up, but it’s possible he might look even better dressed down.

It’s as though he Googled ‘what to wear to drive women wild’ when he woke up this morning and then put on exactly that.

He’s got grey sweatpants slung low on his hips and a snug-fitting white t-shirt stretched across his broad chest. His bare arms are littered with tattoos, and I’m suddenly curious to know if any of them have any specific meaning to him, but now is not the time for twenty questions. Now is the time to remember how to function.

I unbuckle my seat belt and climb out of the vehicle on shaky legs, my body brushing past Ryan’s as I move.

His lip twitches as though he knows exactly what he’s doing to me, and he’s enjoying my reaction.

“Thank you again for this,” I say as I walk around to the back of the ute where Steph is already unloading my stuff.

“Nothing to thank me for.” His voice comes from close behind me. Too close.

I resist the shudder that my body tries to let out.

I’m going to have to get my head on straight, and fast. I’m going to be living with this man for the next little while, at least, and I can’t spend that entire time coaching myself through fighting the level of attraction I’m feeling right now.

I don’t know if it’s the pregnancy hormones making me crazy or what, but I make a mental note to Google it when I get some privacy. It would be great if I could blame this on something other than pure lust.

Both Steph and Ryan refuse to let me lift a single box or bag into the house, even though I’m perfectly capable, so I stand there awkwardly, watching them carry the few things I own, into my new home.

Ryan shows me to the spare room – my room – it’s beautiful. The space is so well coordinated I have to assume he had help from a female. The whole house just has a woman’s touch, which unsettles me in a way I wouldn’t have expected it to.

I can’t help but wonder if he shared this home with a girlfriend, a fiancée... maybe even a wife. I know very little of what’s happened in his life these past few years.

“The door to the left is your bathroom, and that one there is your wardrobe.” He points at the two doors that come off the clean, light room, disrupting my train of thought.

“It’s a beautiful room, Ryan. Thank you.”

I turn to face him. He’s leaning against the door frame, his arm stretched up to rest on the top of the frame. My gaze lingers on his toned and golden bicep.

I don’t know how he does it – he makes standing still look sexy.

“You need to work out what you want me to pay in board, I have some cash on me, but I’ll set up a –”

His brow sets in a deep scowl and he cuts me off. “Stop talking.”

I tilt my head to the side, confused. “What? Why?”

He shakes his head, “I don’t want your money. I won’t take it.”

“You have to, I can’t live here for free,” I reply, outraged.

“If she’s being ungrateful, I’ll swap places with her,” Steph says, appearing behind Ryan and slipping through the doorway. “This house is amazing.”

She’s obviously been giving herself the grand tour, typical Steph. No boundaries and even less shame.

“I’m not ungrateful, I just can’t –”

“Then it’s settled,” Ryan cuts me off with a firm nod.

Those intense eyes of his are staring at me again, a mix of annoyance and confusion swimming in the depths of them. Mine are probably mirroring back the same.

There is no way I’m going to let this go, if it means I have to track down his bank account number myself, or hide cash in drawers around his house, I’ll do it. He’s already being so generous with his time and space, the last thing I want to do is take advantage of him financially too.

“Well, this has been fun, but I’ve got to get going. Mark is waiting for me.”

I hug and thank Steph, and with a few inappropriate, sexually based hand gestures behind Ryan’s back, she’s gone and we’re all alone.

“Come on, I’ll show you the kitchen and living room.”

He reaches his hand out towards me, and it takes me a few seconds to realise that he wants me to take his hand.

Hewants to hold my hand.

I’m ridiculous. I’ve had sex with this man, but our palms touching still freaks me out.

I don’t know where I find the balls, but I comply, resting my hand in his much bigger one.

He leads me down the hall, my palm sweating in his.

Just a simple touch, something so innocent and sweet has my mind racing and my heart galloping in my chest.

I feel like a teenager on a first date, all hormones and nerves as he leads me through the living room, dining and into the kitchen.

“I didn’t know what kind of food you liked to eat, so I got a bit of everything.” His tone is sheepish as he drops my hand to open the double doors on the huge pantry in the corner, revealing shelf after shelf of snacks, cereals, treats… it’s like a supermarket threw up in here. The gesture is so kind, so generous and also so completely unexpected. “There’s fresh fruit and vegetables in the fridge.”

“You know, we might have to make another trip, there’s not nearly enough options,” I tease. “In fact, I think I could eat all this in one afternoon.”

He rubs at the back of his neck, his expression still a little embarrassed. “Is it all too much?”

A smile pulls at my lips as I watch him, watching me. I reach out for him and give his forearm a light squeeze “It’s the sweetest, most considerate thing anyone has done for me in a long time, Ryan, I appreciate it, really.”

Jacob would never have thought to go out and buy anything for me. He probably would have offered to hire someone to do the shopping for us, if I’d asked him to, but he never would have thought about anyone or anything other than himself for long enough to consider doing something so nice for another person.

“I want you to be comfortable here, Darce, it’s important to me. What’s mine is yours.”

It most certainly is not mine, but I can tell by the look in his eyes that this is indeed important to him, and given how much he’s doing for me, the least I can do is go along with it.

“Thank you. You’re too kind to me.”

He shakes his head and opens his mouth to argue, but I get in first, snagging a packet of flavoured popcorn off one of the shelves.

“Are you busy? We could watch a movie?”

His answering smile is blinding, so much so that I physically stumble backwards a step, my jaw gaping.

He’s so gorgeous, it’s almost hard to look directly at him.

“You good?” he asks, his bottom lip working the ring of silver pierced through it.

I nod, my eyes trained on the movement.

Unwise.I tell myself. Staring at Ryan’s lips is definitely a mistake, even more so when I can remember the way that cool metal felt against my bare skin. Skin in places that barely sees the light of day.

“Movie,” I blurt out like a moron.

“You want to watch a movie?”

I nod, dumbly, unable to string a sentence together if my life depended on it. I don’t know how on earth I managed to sleep with this man without completely losing my shit. I can only assume it was the alcohol, and I won’t be able to repeat that until this kid evacuates my uterus.

He smirks, the look too good on him. “What do you want to watch, princess?”

I gape as he brushes past me and walks back out into the living room.

Princess.

I’d always wished that Jacob would call me by a pet name, something sweet, or sexy, or even just something silly that showed he’d gone to the effort to think of it. But he never did.

Princess.

It takes at least three full minutes before my legs remember how to move and my brain resembles something other than mush.

I’m in big trouble here. Big, tattoo-covered, pierced, sexy trouble.