The Anti-Crush by Harper West

19

Elizabeth

My heart was heavy.

I clutched my books to my chest and walked out of the testing center with my head hanging low.

No test had ever been more difficult. It was hell trying to keep my my mind of the test when my thought skeps returning to Nathan. I worked my ass off and I was filled with so much anger at the possibility of my future being thrown away because of heartache.

As I scowled up at the dark stormy sky, it started raining. The icy droplets bounced off my face and quickly soaked my clothes.I feel like I was in some kind of soap opera. Wiping the hot tears from my eye, I sniffled. Surely, I'd failed the MCAT. And it was all because of some boy.

What was I going to tell my mother? What would she think? How could I face her and tell her that we had no future together as a mother-daughter duo for private practice?

Of course, it was too early for me to say such things. We wouldn't have our results back for weeks. But still, I knew in my soul that it was bad. And it felt as if my entire world was crumbling around me.

Adding insult to injury, a large gust of wind hit me so hard that it knocked me a step back. I tripped over some idiot's bicycle, cursing the bicycle and life itself. I sat in the gutter as the rain poured down on me, soaking my jeans, my textbooks, and the brand-new calculator I’d spent sixty bucks on. I sobbed as I lifted it up and began tapping buttons frantically. It was dead. Hopeless, like my life.

I lowered my head, sat, and watched as the notes that I had worked on so tirelessly over four months got soaked by the icy water, making them useless. My only comfort was knowing that at least it was over. I didn't have to kill myself over a test anymore.

“Elizabeth?" The voice was familiar and comforting. Quiet. Just barely audible over the rain.

I looked up and met Nathan’s gaze, his blond hair dripping wet, plastered to his forehead, skimming his eyebrows. My heart ached even more. My heart was breaking over the test, but I'd broken his along the way and I felt absolutely gutted over it

"What are you doing here?” I asked. I ran my hand down my slick skin, trying to wipe the water from my face. It was useless, of course, as the downpour continued.

"I came to talk," he said.

My eyes widened as I finally noticed that he was in full football gear. Shoulder pads and all, his helmet resting beside him as he helped me pick up my belongings.

"The game?" I asked, my voice hoarse as thunder cracked above us.

"What about it?'' he asked, not meeting my eyes as he extended a hand, pulling me to my feet.

"You have the game today, right? Isn't there a game?" I said, racking my brain, trying to remember the weekends.

"Yeah, and the NFL scouts are there right now," he said. We stood in silence, the rain pouring all around us.

“You're missing your shot," I said as I stared into those troubled blue eyes that fit the storm so well.

"I know," he sighed. He swallowed, and his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat.

“So... wait. You're missing out on the opportunity of a lifetime to stand in the rain outside a testing center?" I asked. “Why, Nathan?”

"You know you're the second person to say that to me tonight. I'm not missing any opportunity. I'm right where I want to be?" My body stiffened. I couldn't believe what he was saying. "You're more important to me than a football game and the NFL. Dammit, Elizabeth, you're the most important thing in my entire life. I'm in love with you."

His words hung in the air once more.

Tears streamed down my cheeks, blending in with the rain.

"I'm in love with you, Elizabeth. Maybe I'm a fool, but I thought that you were smart enough to realize that you were in love with me, too," he said as he shifted his weight and looked around the empty campus.

That stung just a little, but I knew that I deserved it. He was more important than anything. I was being short-sighted. I could have Nathan and medical school. I was smart enough to handle both. And I was definitely smart enough not to let Nathan go again.

"You still want to be with me?" I asked, "Even though I ran away and broke up with you in a text message like a coward?"

"Of course, I want to be with you. Even if you chuck this thing at me," he laughed as he lifted my large textbook.

No longer able to contain myself, I took a page from McKenzie’s playbook and jumped into his arms, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, threading my fingers in his hair and searing my mouth to his. I finally felt warm on this chilly night.

Nathan held me close and kissed me, sending thrills of lust through me. No, not just lust. Love. I loved him. And I had to say it before I exploded.

"I love you," I whispered as I broke away and brushed his damp hair away from his face. "I'm sorry it took me so long to see it. God, I'm such an idiot." I half-laughed, half sobbed.

"You're not an idiot," he murmured, "you're the smartest person I know."