Healed by Evan Grace

Chapter Two

 

Colton

 

I do a back squat with my fellow teammate Tyrell spotting me. It’s been two weeks since I saw Heidi and my heart started beating again. I know that sounds corny, but it’s true.

Leaving Heidi five years ago was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but I had a good reason. I thought I was protecting her from an uncertain future. Fuck, but she’s even more beautiful than when we were younger.

The look on her face after she slapped me will haunt me forever. Her repeating the words that I had said to her back then hurt worse than any hit I’ve ever taken in football.

“Fuck, Colt. You’re a fucking beast.” Tyrell squats behind me with his hands hovering under the barbell. I stand up and step forward, placing the barbell in the rack.

My workouts have definitely gotten better in the past two weeks because I’ve had copious amounts of stress to work off. I slap Tyrell on the back as we switch spots, and I spot him; of course he has to add about a hundred more pounds to the barbell.

Once he finishes his set, we grab a couple bottles of water and chug them down. “You have plans tonight?” he asks.

Coming to this team right before the start of the season was a risky move, but Ty has been the one to make the transition super easy for me. He and his wife, Monique, have had me over a lot. My parents are still in New York for the time being, so it’s been nice having home-cooked meals. Ty and I have shared many a beer on his back porch—enough for me to tell him all about Heidi and why I left her.

“Nah, I was just going to pick up a steak or something.”

Tyrell follows me into the locker room. “Come over for dinner. Moni will be happy to feed you.”

His wife is amazing, and in her opinion a home-cooked meal solves many a problem. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy spending time with them. In such a short period of time, Ty has become a good friend, but I hate feeling like I’m encroaching on their family time.

“Sure, thanks. I’ll bring her favorite wine and cupcakes for the kids.”

He slaps me on the back, and then we head to the showers—separately of course.

 

***

 

I scroll through Heidi’s Instagram page. She’s always had a thing for pink, and I’m not surprised that her hair has been various shades of it over the past couple of years.

I look through her pictures, and I don’t see a boyfriend or a husband. I won’t lie—it makes me happy knowing she is single. It gives me the slightest twinge of hope—hope that I could win her back.

When I tell her the reason I left, she’ll understand … I hope. It killed me to make her feel like I didn’t love her anymore, but it was the only way to sever ties completely. 

I stop on a picture of Heidi in a bikini. She’s always had a beautiful body, but now—now it’s even better. Her athletic build is curvier and her breasts are fuller. Heidi has the body of a woman.

I exit out of the app because I’m nothing but a creepy stalker. In my bedroom, I grab the frame that’s on my nightstand. It’s a picture of Heidi and me the summer before our senior year in high school.

Heidi was in a pink sundress, her blonde hair was up in a high ponytail, and her feet were bare. I was sitting behind her, my arms pulling her back against my chest. We were babies, but I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.

Unfortunately, fate had other plans, and honestly, I didn’t expect to live past the age nineteen. It made it easier to leave her, knowing I was leaving her to live the life she deserved.

I put the picture back on the nightstand. After I shut off the lamp, I crawl underneath my covers and watch the shadows dance across the ceiling. I’m not sure how to approach Heidi, but I need to tread lightly; otherwise, she’ll never let me back in.

With everything on my mind, it’s a long time before I fall asleep.

 

***

 

I pull into the parking lot of Sugar and Spice, Ink and park my SUV. I’m not sure what I’m doing here, but I wanted to see her. In the past month I’ve only seen Heidi a couple of times, and each time I’ve tried to talk to her she runs in the other direction as fast as she can.

Inside, the place is buzzing with activity. There are people in the waiting area. Greta sits behind the counter with a platinum blonde. I spot Mona and Sierra both working on people, but I don’t see Heidi.

Greta looks up and crosses her arms over her chest. “What are you doing here? Heidi doesn’t want to see you.”

“I just want a chance to talk to her. I swear I’m not trying to hurt her, but there are some things that I need to say to her … please.” I hope she can see that I’m sincere. “Please, Greta.”

She sighs. “She’s in the office down the hall, but if she tells you to leave, leave.” 

“Thank you.” Every step I take down the hall my stomach starts to turn violently, but I breathe through it. I reach the open door and find Heidi sitting behind the desk; her cotton candy pink hair is twisted up into an intricate knot on top of her head.

She’s leaned over the desk, drawing, and she’s so focused on what she’s doing, she’s oblivious to me watching her. When Heidi used to be focused on something, her tongue would poke out from the corner of her lips, which it’s doing right now.

I could watch her forever, but I know I can’t, so I knock on the door frame to get her attention. She looks up, and her eyes widen in obvious surprise and then apparent disgust.

“What are you doing here?” She slowly stands. “You need to leave, Colton.”

I shake my head. “I can’t. I can’t leave until you agree to meet me so we can talk. I know I don’t have the right to ask anything of you, but if you give me the chance to explain, then maybe you’ll understand.” I walk further into the office and come around the desk to stand in front of her.

“What makes you think you deserve that chance?” Heidi backs away from me, or tries because I match her step for step, advancing on her until we’re almost chest to chest.

“I know I don’t deserve a chance, but I want it—I need it. Please, Heidi. I promise that after you hear me out, if you still want me gone, I’ll be gone.” I sound so fucking desperate right now, but I don’t care.

She doesn’t speak right away, but so many emotions cross her face while I wait for her to answer. I want to pull her into my arms and hold her tight as I tell her that I never stopped loving her.  Every minute I was away from her felt like an eternity.

My parents didn’t understand my decision to end things with Heidi and tried multiple times to talk me out of it. I just didn’t want to saddle her with everything that was about to happen.

She lets out a resigned sigh. “Fine, we can talk. After that, I don’t want to see you again.” Heidi scoots past me and then practically runs out of the office.

I’m not feeling super hopeful, but she did agree to meet with me. I’ll tell her everything, and just maybe she’ll give me a second chance.