When Life Happened by Jewel E. Ann

Chapter Twenty-Eight

If Parker still had a heartbeat, then it wasn’t broken. That was the good news. Gus tried to break it. And for a few days, it seemed as though he had succeeded. Until … Levi gave her an out. An invitation to live life for a while. She couldn’t accept it for many reasons, or at least one: it was insane. Parker Cruse wasn’t insane.

“Oh, god … Caleb.”

Not yet, anyway. At the top of the stairs, Parker cringed hearing Piper’s moan behind their closed bedroom door.

“So … fucking … beautiful …” Caleb’s labored words twisted Parker’s gut.

She scurried to her room, easing the door shut behind her. Visions of walking in on them years ago came into clear focus. Time hadn’t faded a single part of that memory. With her back to the door, she slid down onto her butt, grimacing from the bruise of the bite mark. A few feet in front of her was the suitcase, still full of clothes, still full of memories waiting to be made.

Gus had shit timing. She chuckled out loud. Maybe she was crazy. Blaming him for dying at the wrong time didn’t feel like the thought of a person with a sound mind. Was there ever a right time to die? Yes. The right time for Gus would have been after their trip.

After his divorce.

After marrying Parker.

After four kids.

After a dozen grandkids.

Maybe even after a few great-grandkids.

Was that too much to ask?

“Despicable to your last breath, Gus.” She continued her one-sided conversation. “You could have at least left me your hat or a good referral for another electrician.” Parker slapped a hand over her mouth to mute her laughter. The door at the opposite end of the hall squeaked as it opened. The lovers had finished their morning sexcapade. When she heard their distant chatter in the kitchen, she changed into her workout clothes and prepared to sweat out the crazy inside of her, like exorcising the demons.

*

Days of OperationGet a Life ended in a string of calls and emails thanking Parker for applying but “the position has already been filled,” or “we’re looking for someone with more experience.”

“You could go back to college, even technical training at a community college.” Janey passed around a plate of pot roast with her family gathered at her dinner table.

Parker couldn’t deny her mother had never looked happier—her whole family together again and on amicable terms. “Medical transcription. Dental Assisting. Massage therapy. Boring, boring, boring. I’d like to break into the media field. There’s simply not a lot of options around here.”

“Maybe you need to move to a bigger city.”

“Bart!” Janey scolded their dad. “I just got my girls back together again. Stop trying to send them away.”

“He’s right.” Parker nodded, taking a bite of the tender, juicy meat. “A bigger city would mean more job opportunities.”

“You went to Chicago after you graduated and didn’t find anything there.” Her mom had to remind Parker of her failed attempts at finding a good job after graduation.

“Maybe I should try again. Or be open to moving anywhere I can get a break. I need experience in this field, and right now I’m not in a position to be choosy.”

“This is too upsetting. You’re all trying to ruin my happiness.” Janey slumped in her chair. “Sometimes I feel like nobody wants to be around me. I hope you girls both have kids someday that don’t want to be around you either, so you can know how I feel.”

Parker and Piper shared knowing smirks. At that moment, they weren’t twins at odds with one another, they were sisters who knew how their mother turned everything into a violin-playing sob story of how nobody loved her. They’d watched her drag her blanket through the dirt many times over the years. Janey wasn’t suicidal, but she craved the attention that came with “sometimes I think you’d be better off if I weren’t around,” or “sorry my opinions don’t matter to you. Clearly I’m nothing more than a burden in your life.”

“So in other news …” Caleb interrupted.

Janey rolled her eyes. In spite of everything, she loved him as much as if he were her own son. And he could get away with far more than Parker or Piper.

“There’s been another delay in starting construction on our house.”

“Oh, god, you’re living with me forever, aren’t you?” Parker mumbled while blotting her mouth with a napkin.

“Sorry to disappoint you, but no.”

“They just put the Westmans’ house on the market.” Piper’s back straightened as she smiled on a deep inhale. “We’re going to look at it tomorrow, and if we like it, we’re going to make an offer.”

“Oh my!” Janey pressed her hand to her chest, alight with excitement. “We’re all going to be neighbors!”

“What?” Parker didn’t recognize her own voice, but it was enough to silence the room, landing all eyes on her.

“Um …” Piper’s eyes flitted between Parker and everyone else at the table. “I thought you’d be happy. If we buy their place, then we won’t be living with you as long.”

“But that’s …” Parker lowered her voice, searching for an explanation that would make sense to them. She had to find one. She had to. “They died. Won’t it feel weird living in their house?”

Caleb shrugged. “It’s not like they died in the house. And we didn’t know them, so I don’t see what would be weird about it.”

“I knew them.” Her heart meant it as a plea, but she couldn’t say it louder than a whisper and still hold it together.

“For a month. That’s not that long.” Her mom leaned over and rested her hand on Parker’s. “I’m not implying that you don’t miss them, but I don’t think it would be weird for very long. I’m sure in ten years when Piper and Caleb fill that house with kids and our family memories, you probably won’t even think of the Westmans.”

Ten years was a long time. A month was not. But it didn’t take Gus long to leave a permanent mark on Parker. Time couldn’t erase that no matter how many kids and memories Piper and Caleb shared in that house.

“We might not even like it.” Piper shrugged with a flash of nerves curling her lips.

They would love it. It was well-built and stunning. Parker knew it wasn’t a matter of if they moved in, but when.

*

Excusing herself, Parkerwalked home to have some time alone to process another bend in the road of her life. She held her hand up to her forehead, squinting at the Westmans’ house. A white SUV with several boxes, a dog bed, and suitcase behind it occupied the driveway. Levi had to be leaving. It made her happy that he decided to drive Rags instead of putting him on a plane.

She removed her shoes and stood in the suffocating quietude of the farmhouse. Walking across the road wasn’t enough distance between her and a life of lonely agony, joblessness, and ghosts only she could see. With the heel of her hand, she rubbed circles on her breast bone, trying to relieve the pain. The only time she could remember not feeling that crushing pressure was with Levi. His touch took it away. It was sunshine and oxygen. It was everything.

“Tell me what to do, Gus.” Parker closed her eyes. A second later, she opened them to a dog barking. “Okay, I hear you.” A grin stole her face as she ran up the stairs. Grabbing as many toiletries as she could carry in one trip from the bathroom, she threw them in the suitcase, latched it, and lugged it down the stairs. She snagged her purse off the kitchen table and shoved her feet into her blue Chuck’s.

The second she opened the door, her lungs took their first breath since the day Gerald arrived at her door. It felt amazing. Tears stung her eyes. “Wait!” she yelled, dragging her suitcase across the impossible rocky terrain of her drive, chasing the white SUV driving away next door. “WAIT! LEVI!” She waved her free hand. The torque of her purse and suitcase wrenching her shoulder made her grimace, but she didn’t stop until Levi started to turn onto the main road.

Grabbing a golfball-sized rock, she pitched it at the vehicle. It pinged against the hatchback. Red brake lights illuminated. Her grin reappeared as she resumed her mad dash. The driver’s door opened. Levi stepped out with a wrinkle of confusion along his brow as he moved toward the back of the SUV, staring at her for a long moment before inspecting the vehicle.

“You dented my rental.” He ran his fingers over the small dent then looked back at her as she slowed to a stop, breathless.

“Sorry, you wouldn’t stop.”

His eyes shifted to her suitcase and then back to her. “Didn’t know I needed to stop.”

Parker adjusted the strap of her purse on her shoulder and tucked her hair behind her ears. “I like to cook. Most of the time I eat a healthy, balanced diet. But sometimes I need random junk food from a convenience store. I need you to accommodate my needs without judgment. Can you do that?”

A twist of the tiniest smile played across his lips as he wet them. “I think so. What does that have to do with you damaging my rental?”

She tugged her suitcase forward, dropping it at his feet. “I’m saying I think I need you.”

Torturing her with nothing more than that barely-there smile, he inspected her and her baggage. Turning, he opened the back and put her suitcase on his, next to the boxes. Rags barked from the backseat, tongue out, tail wagging. Levi walked around to the passenger’s side and opened the door, his grin growing bigger by the second.

Parker hopped in the front seat, unable to control the excitement on her own face.

“Being needed,” he said. “It’s a pretty amazing feeling.”

She blinked back her tears. “It’s indescribable.”

*

They made ita good twenty miles down the road without saying a word. Quick sideways glances and subtle smiles said all that mattered. When it sank in that she had in fact done the most spontaneous thing of her entire life, Parker fished out her phone and sent a text to her mom.

Parker:Please don’t make this about you, but I’ve left to look for my life. I love you and you are needed in my life more than you’ll ever know. TTYL xo

She silenced her phone, knowing it would explode with texts in a matter of seconds.

“Letting people know where you are in case this turns into an abduction?” Levi grinned, keeping his eyes on the road.

“Hope you’re not planning on demanding some sort of ransom. My family doesn’t have that much money … except for my sister and her husband. But I’m pretty certain they wouldn’t pay up.”

“Damn! There goes my rent money.” Levi grabbed his sunglasses from the drink holder and slipped them on.

“Are we going all the way?” she asked.

Levi shot her a quick sidelong glance then shifted in his seat while clearing his throat. “Um …”

“Oh jeez!” She laughed. “That sounded so wrong. I meant are we driving straight through and just switching off driving, or are we stopping for the night?”

He massaged the back of his neck. “Oh, well, it’s a minimum of a twenty-one-hour drive. We’ll make several stops along the way. I’m in no hurry. Are you?”

“I’m just along for the ride. Once we get out of Kansas, it will all be new scenery to me. Drive as slow as you want.”

“I don’t drive slow, quite the opposite, but we might take a more scenic route.”

“Fine by me.” Parker said goodbye to her familiar surroundings one flat field at a time. “I have no job, no money, no direction, nobody—except my parents—missing me.”