Highlander’s Broken Love by Fiona Faris

Chapter Twenty-Three

“What?” Elisabeth found her voice as she stared at Ian. He wasn’t looking at her but looking at his friend instead. “You wish to send me back now?” She couldn’t say all that she truly wanted to say, not in front of his friends.

What about what we shared last night? Didn’t that mean anything to you? Are you done with me now?

“Ian,” Laird Alex took a step toward Ian, his tone a little wary. “That isnae necessary. We can take Elisabeth to Abbey St Bathans. There we can send messages to her faither and discuss her safe return. It is better to do this kind of thing with care and tact.” Despite Laird Alex’s sharp tone, Ian just shook his head, his mind clearly made up.

“That isnae necessary,” he said strongly. “Ye wish me to exercise diplomacy? That kind of thing is only required when a Laird wants a treaty with a man. Her faither would never agree to a treaty. I ken that.”

“How do you know that?” Elisabeth asked, taking a step toward him.

Still, he wouldn’t look at her. He walked straight past her, heading toward the stone archway. He walked past her as though she hadn’t spoken at all, as if she were some sort of object in the landscape, just another part of the church or maybe even a plant, but not human at all. It crushed her. She balled her hands into fists as she watched him walk away.

“Did ye bring horses?” Ian asked as Kenny and Alex followed him.

“Yes, three of them,” Kenny answered.

At first, Elisabeth didn’t follow. She glanced to the altar stone where she and Ian had made love. The sight of it now so empty and cold hurt all the more. Then, she followed them out, her gaze heading straight for Ian as he mounted a horse. She walked toward him, ready to mount in front of him as she had done before, when he stopped her, holding out a hand.

“Ye ride with Kenny,” he said, his voice dark and firm with an order.

“I rode with you before,” she said quietly, moving her head to try and catch his eyes. He purposefully turned his head away from hers, avoiding her entirely.

“We ride only a short distance together today before Kenny will take ye to the English. Ye will ride with him,” he spoke these words without looking back at her. He just turned his horse and began to head down the hill. She glanced between Alex and Kenny on top of their horses. Alex was frowning, staring after his friend. Kenny just shrugged as he looked back to her.

“We best get going, Elisabeth,” he said eventually, beckoning her forward.

With shaky legs, Elisabeth walked toward Kenny. She was desperate to run after Ian, to beg him to tell her what on earth had happened for him to suddenly be so cold with her.

Kenny offered a hand to help her up, and she mounted behind him. Everything passed in silence as Alex followed Ian down the hill with Kenny and her trailing at the back. The horses passed through a dense thicket of forest, making it difficult for Elisabeth to be able to look ahead and catch a glimpse of Ian at all, yet she tried, nevertheless. Each time she caught sight of his face, she prayed to God that he would turn around and look at her, that this icy manner of his would vanish, and he would be his warm self again. But it never happened, and her prayers were left unanswered.

Soon, she gave up trying to catch his eye at all, and, instead, let her eyes drift without really noticing anything they saw as her mind tried to make sense of what had happened.

Ian had told her he adored her, and now he was treating her as though she were nothing at all to him.

Had it all been an act?

Elisabeth closed her eyes tightly, trying to block out the thought. She’d heard of men who would lie to women in order to get something from them. Now she knew exactly what that something was, taking their pleasure from a woman’s body. Could it be true that men would lie about what they felt in order just to have that experience?

Did Ian lie just to spend that night with me?

Her eyes shot open as she placed one hand on the saddle, anchoring herself to it, and placed her other arm around her body, holding herself tightly. She felt worthless from the sum total of Ian’s actions and words. He had tricked her.

A flashing memory of Jockie walking into her cage entered her mind. The two men were related, after all. One man was going to take it by force; it seemed the other, Ian, had tricked her into giving her body to him.

The thought stung, and she wanted to reject it.

That is not the Ian I know.

When the horses curved alongside a river, heading across flat land, Kenny pulled his horse close to Ian’s. It gave her a brief opportunity—very brief—of speaking to Ian again.

“Ian?” she called to him. She decided to ignore the fact that Kenny and Alex could hear her. She wanted an answer, and she was going to try hard to get what she wanted. “Did I do something wrong?” she asked.

Ian darted his eyes her way, then they turned from her. It was barely an acknowledgment at all.

“Ian?” she said his name again, pleadingly.

“Let’s just concentrate on gettin’ ye home,” he said sharply, before pulling the horse forward and leaving her.

Sitting behind Kenny, Elisabeth felt the prick of tears threatening. She held her breath, hoping it would stop them, yet they came anyway, quietly trickling down her cheeks. To her surprise, Kenny let their horse drop back a little more, then he pulled something out of his trouser pocket for her.

“Here, take this,” he said softly, passing her a handkerchief.

“Thank you,” she murmured, using it to dry her tears. To her relief, Kenny didn’t ask why she was crying; perhaps he could see it without her having to say a word.

* * *

“So, are ye goin’ to tell me what is wrong?” Alex asked. Ian merely glanced at his friend before looking forward. Their horses were ahead on the path now, with Kenny and Elisabeth dropping quite far behind. They were quickly coming to the point where Kenny would have to take another path in order to deliver Elisabeth to Duns Castle and her father’s camp.

“I am fine,” Ian said firmly, trying not to look back at his friend again.

“On this occasion, that was a shockin’ly poor lie,” Alex said.

“So, what if it is?” Ian snapped under his breath in a harsh tone of voice. “What is wrong is me business only.”

“It is? Do ye really think that?” Alex demanded and pulled his horse closer to Ian’s, shortening the distance between them and forcing Ian to look at him. “Ye helped me all those years ago with Delilah. I confided everythin’ to ye. Ye really arenae goin’ to trust me now and confide in me?”

“I cannae deal with this now, Alex,” Ian said quickly and glanced back over his shoulder. He couldn’t see Elisabeth’s face as she was hidden behind Kenny’s back. A handkerchief fluttered though, just past Kenny’s shoulder.

Is she cryin’?

The thought made him hurt, as though someone had placed a dagger in his chest, and he looked back to Alex again. He couldn’t let himself feel bad for Elisabeth, not now that he knew where she came from. She had to be just like her father underneath it all. Perhaps this kind, delicate manner she wore was all an act. It was manipulative and proved just how like her father she truly was.

“Ian?” Alex said his name a little more loudly. “How blind do ye think I am?”

“I never said ye were blind,” Ian said, shaking his head.

“Nay?” Alex scoffed. “So ye think I cannae see the fact that ye seem to be ignorin’ and rejectin’ a woman ye have been infatuated with these last few days? Even Delilah could see it, and ye ken she cannae see.”

“I daenae ken what ye mean,” Ian said, facing the path ahead.

“I am insulted ye think I am so blind,” Alex snapped.

“That isnae what I am thinkin’,” Ian said with feeling, but Alex just carried on.

“It clearly is. Why will ye nae tell me what is happenin’ here?” he asked and gestured back to the horse behind them.

“Now is nae the time,” Ian said, trying to keep a calm voice. “I will tell ye later.”

“Later?” Alex repeated, his voice lilting high with surprise. “After ye have returned her to her faither and stand a good chance of never seein’ her again?”

“Aye, precisely,” Ian said the words with so much force that he could see Alex shifting in his saddle, frowning a little in irritation. “Daenae look at me like that, Alex.”

“Like what? Like I think ye have lost yer senses? Because if that’s how I appear, I am glad of it,” he whispered harshly. “I have never seen ye fall over a woman like ye have done with that lass back there. Ye’ve been infatuated with her. I want to ken why ye are now sabotagin’ yer own chance of happiness.”

“Alex, listen to me,” Ian lifted a hand, stretching out toward his friend in a pleading gesture. “Ye have just used a word which describes what has been happenin’ here perfectly.”

“What word?” Alex asked, baffled.

“Infatuation,” Ian concluded with a firm nod. “Maybe that was all it was, infatuation. Senseless and momentary, a bit like a shooting star. Bright one minute, then gone the next. Infatuation doesnae last. It is merely me foolin’ meself. That is all.” At his words, Alex’s eyebrows shot up.

“Ye really think that?”

“I do,” Ian nodded again. “I will tell ye all later, when we are off the road and Elisabeth is far away, but it is safe to say that Elisabeth is nae who I thought she was.”

“What do ye mean by that?” Alex asked, tilting his head to the side.

Ian struggled for words as memories swam into his vision. He could picture her father so perfectly.

On the day that Ian had arrived at the English prison, he’d not only been greeted by a line of soldiers, but by General Arthur Rolfe, too. The General had stood up on a platform, tall and wiry with short hair and a trimmed blond goatee with a thin moustache that looked more like a rat’s tail than strands of hair. His clothes had sickened Ian on sight. He was standing in a dirty prison, yet the outfit was ostentatious, with pearls lining the russet red coat and the waistcoat inlaid with a pattern of autumn leaves. The court shoes he had worn were buffed to a shine and decorated with little bows. Even the shirt sleeves that hung down out of the cuffs of his jacket were lacy, ending in enough lace and ruffle to hide his hands.

That was the man who had watched as Ian was flogged. He’d never shown the slightest distaste for the torture he had ordered, much less any sympathy for the fellow human being suffering so much pain at his command. He had only demanded answers to his questions as Ian was whipped again and again. Once, when General Rolfe had stood too close to the beating, some of Ian’s blood had fallen on the man’s excessively buffed shoes. It had been abhorrent to him, and he’d demanded that servants clean his shoes at once.

Elisabeth was the daughter of that evil man.

Ian felt strongly that now was not the time to explain everything to Alex. He was still struggling with this new knowledge himself, so the conversation would have to wait for later.

“I cannae explain it all now, Alex,” Ian must have put some desperation in his tone, for he could see Alex’s expression alter. It went from anger to a kind of understanding, and his friend eventually nodded.

“Very well, but I hope yer explanation is a good one,” Alex said with a warning in his voice.

“Why do ye say that?” Ian frowned.

“Because I daenae need to be beside a woman to ken when she’s cryin’,” Alex gestured behind them. “Ye have caused that, Ian. I hope there is good reason.”

Ian glanced back again, feeling the pain sink lower in his stomach at the thought of Elisabeth’s tears. Before his guilt could grow too heavy, the image of General Rolfe with his sickening smile, flamboyant outfits and cruel interrogations appeared in his mind. It made Ian turn his head forward, indicating the conversation was over.

“Kenny,” Alex called back as they reached a fork in the road. “Ye will have to take Elisabeth this way.”

Ian pulled his horse to the side of the road and waited for Kenny’s horse to catch up. Once beside him, Ian opened his mouth to urge Kenny to depart straight away, but Alex spoke first.

“Kenny, ye and I should give these two some privacy for a minute,” Alex said, gesturing between Ian and Elisabeth.

“That is nae necessary,” Ian said quickly, staring at his friend.

“We can argue about it later,” Alex said with resolve. “Ye may nae wish to speak, but I think Elisabeth wishes to. Am I right, me Lady?”

“Yes,” she nodded at him, her tears dried now.

To Ian’s surprise, Alex dismounted his horse and went to help Elisabeth down from Kenny’s mount. Then he directed Kenny to follow him off to the side a little. Reluctantly, Ian jumped down from his own horse. As he moved toward Elisabeth, he let his eyes settle on her face for a moment. There was the same delicate beauty there as before, the same lips that had moaned his name the night before when he had made love to her.

Stop thinkin’ of that!

He looked away from her, at the trees instead.

“Can you no longer look at me?” Elisabeth whispered, staring at him.

“It is best this way,” he said, trying not to let his heart bleed for her.

“No, it’s not,” her words were strong, spoken with feeling. “What happened this morning? You went from saying that you ad –”

“Forget what I said,” he snapped, interrupting her to avoid being reminded of what he had said. He didn’t need to hear how much of a fool he had been, how he had allowed himself to care so much for General Rolfe’s daughter that he would tell her he adored her. What a fool he had been to be so manipulated by her!

“Did you not mean it then?” she asked. Ian couldn’t tell her he hadn’t meant it, for he had. Instead, he said nothing and folded his arms, allowing her to draw her own conclusions. The way her eyes closed, warding off more tears, showed the conclusion she had come to. “You tricked me.”

“Tricked you?” he said in shock, just as her eyes opened again.

“You played with me,” she whispered the words, as though fearful to say them at all. “You played with my heart. You tricked me into falling in love with you, and all for what? Just to have what we had last night? That’s all it was, wasn’t it? Just a release?”

Love…she said love.

Ian could say nothing. His lips were parted in amazement at the accusations she had made.

“I can’t believe you did that,” she whispered, as a tear escaped down her cheek. “You deceived me.”

“I did nay such thing,” he hissed the words, but she appeared not to hear them.

She is tryin’ to manipulate ye again. That is why she said she loved ye. She is continuin’ this act of sweet temperament. She is just like her faither. Remember that. Born from the same blood, how could she nae be?

Now that the thought had occurred to him, it wouldn’t leave him. She would have seen from the beginning of their acquaintance that he was not like Jockie or Grier. He was more gallant than that. She could have used that to take advantage of him, to manipulate his nature and emotions to help her escape.

“I didn’t think you were capable of such cruelty,” she said with watery eyes.

She’d crossed a line now with her choice of words. He took a step back from her.

“Daenae ye talk to me about cruelty,” he said louder than he had intended. “I think I ken what that word means much more than ye do.”

“Why are you talking to me like this?” she begged, stepping forward. “Was last night really all a trick? Did it mean nothing? Answer that, and I’ll leave you now; I’ll be gone for good. I just need to know –”

“Then ye already ken me answer,” he lied, for it had meant everything to him, but he was happy for her to believe it was a trick, knowing he had to see the back of her now. “Go, Elisabeth.” He nearly said sithiche, but he held back. That’s not who she was anymore.

She placed a hand over her mouth, clearly trying to stop more tears, but they came anyway. She walked down the turning in the road that would take her to the English camp. At once, Kenny ran after her, pulling his horse behind him.

Ian watched her go, feeling his heart break at the sight of her pain. A beat later, Alex appeared beside him.

“I hope ye ken what ye’re doin’,” Alex warned. Ian was no longer so confident. In the heat of the discovery of her identity he had been so certain, yet Alex’s support for Elisabeth was beginning to make him wonder if he was in the wrong.

Had he misjudged Elisabeth?