Held by Luna Voss

9

Melyta

My cheeks burn as I stand in the corner, shamefully aroused by the plug in my ass. But that’s not why I’m embarrassed. Everything about that was embarrassing. Whatever it was that made me decide to do that, I need to figure it out and fix my shit.

Barion is right. I went out of my way to get punished. And frankly, it’s not the first time. But never like that. Never with Korva around, never while we were doing something important.

Why do I do that? Why did I do that?

I think back to the week leading up to my heat. Things with Barion didn’t feel so good then, and I was acting out then, too.

Except I wasn’t getting spanked for it. Just put in the corner, mostly.

Just like I am now.

My memory turns to how Barion treated me a moment ago. He started off stern, and then he was so understanding.

Too understanding.

No, that’s not right. I want understanding. I love that about him.

This wasn’t firm. Not firm enough, anyway. I mean, what the fuck did I just do? Snap at him in front of Korva? It doesn’t feel right that the only reason he put me over his knee was to insert the plug. A year ago, I would have been disciplined much more thoroughly. Barion hasn’t spanked me since I hid my heat from him and he rescued me in the grocery store. And thanks to the urgency of that situation, even that was cut short. The last time before that was weeks ago, when I drove right before taking my driving test.

That felt like a real punishment. Like he was really in charge. He even, ahem, ended it the way I find most fulfilling.

I’ve been missing that side of our relationship lately. I think today, subconsciously, I was trying to reassure myself that it still exists.

And at least today, it didn’t.

Instead of firmness, I got patience. I needed a rock to lean on, and what I found instead was a patch of grass. Comfortable, but not supportive. Not the way I needed.

Well, if there aren’t any consequences around here, I don’t see why I should bother following the rules. Barion can talk all he wants about spankings, but it doesn’t mean shit until he actually backs it up.

Usually, after a punishment, I would be waiting, heart racing, for Barion to fuck me in my bottom hole. My punishment hole. I love how complete that makes me feel. How dominated by him.

Now the need is there, but not my mate. And I’m not sure I feel obligated to play by the rules.

With a guilty, if entirely unnecessary glance in both directions, I step out of my panties and lie down on the bed. My hand is between my legs before I even know it, and it feels good.

I haven’t touched myself much lately. Or at all, in truth. I’ve had Barion for that, whenever I’ve wanted him. And in any case, lately I haven’t even been allowed to come without his permission.

The thought gives me a guilty thrill. How long has it been since I had an orgasm I didn’t have to ask for? Months, at least. I’ve almost forgotten what it feels like.

I’m going to remind myself.

My other hand presses on the plug as I rub my pussy, biting my lip. I’m close. I’m close. I’m so close…

A moan escapes me and I clamp my mouth shut. This needs to be silent. My toes curl and my whole body shakes as I come, my ass clenching around the plug.

And then, as quickly as it hit me, it’s over. And I’m left panting and sweaty on the bed, feeling strangely guilty.

I’ve broken rules before. But this feels different. This time, I can go downstairs and no one will be any the wiser. I’m not going to get punished for this. I’m going to get away with it.

His fault,I think resentfully as I button my shorts and prepare to go downstairs, frustratingly unsatisfied.