Not His Omega To Love by GS Holmes

11Cody

“Oh my god,I’m sooo sorry.”

I covered my face with my hands to block out the naked image of Reggie in front of me. All I wanted was to use the bathroom. Accustomed to having my own bathroom at home, I hadn’t thought to knock. Just dragged my feet inside with my hand down my pants, fixing my morning semi.

“It’s okay. I’m just getting out.”

I still kept my eyes closed, my heart pounding in my chest. It had been doing that a lot since Mr. Finch rescued me last night like a knight in shining armor. Even though I’d slept in a nice bed without anyone cursing or banging on the door, the slightest sound had woken me up. I might never be able to sleep well again. Nothing could have prepared me for staying at that dingy motel. The only thing that made it safer than being on the streets was the door that kept everyone out, and I hadn’t been too convinced that it would have held up another night.

“Everything okay?”

I spun around to Mr. Finch, and heat crept up in my cheeks. He glanced from me to Reggie, frowning.

“I needed to use the bathroom,” I said quickly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know Reggie was in here, I swear.”

When he gave me a small smile and nodded, my world felt a tiny bit better. The last thing I needed was for him to think I was back together with Reggie. It seemed super important that he understood that.

“Yeah, Dad, I’m just leaving.”

“You’ll use my bathroom from now on,” Mr. Finch told Reggie. “Cody can use this one.”

I clapped my hand over my mouth. “Oh no, I don’t want to put anyone out.”

“It’s already done.” He indicated with his thumb for Reggie to get out. The teen grabbed a towel from the rack and rubbed at his hair as he walked out of the bathroom.

“After your shower, I need you in the kitchen, Cody,” Mr. Finch said. “Both you and Reggie. There are things we need to discuss, and we need to do that before you go to school.”

I was going to school? My stomach churned at the idea. How many people knew by now the reason I hadn’t been in attendance? The only other omega I’d known from high school who’d been pregnant had transferred schools after some nasty stuff had been written about her on her locker. I couldn’t go through that.

I nodded at Mr. Finch, who walked to the stairs, leaving me alone. With a sigh, I closed the door and hurried over to the toilet to pee. Reggie was a slob who’d missed the clothes hamper, and he hadn’t even bothered to pick up the T-shirt from the floor. The counter was such a mess I wanted to either dump everything into the trash or reorganize the shelf, but it wasn’t mine to touch. I was nothing but a guest in their house, living on their generosity until Mr. Finch weighed in on my pregnancy. He would take Reggie’s side and expect me to get rid of the fetus, wouldn’t he?

My throat thickened with tears stinging the back of my eyes, I got into the shower and blasted myself with cold water. I could feel myself caving in already, but not because I wanted to. Being alone and wanting to keep the baby when everyone else disagreed weighed heavily on me, but I would listen to Mr. Finch. He was the only person who showed me any sign of compassion at all, and if he thought it would be best for me to have an abortion, I’d heed his advice. I’d be crushed, but I would do it.

After taking a quick shower, I returned to the bedroom and grimaced at the clothes on my bed. They were the same clothes I’d worn when I left my home. Once I told my parents I was keeping the baby, they hadn’t allowed me to pack anything. They’d shown me the door. I’d barely been able to grab my backpack. I’d thought it best not to waste the little money I had on clothes but to keep it for food.

Dressed, I descended the stairs slowly and entered the kitchen. I braced myself for the stench of the food but was surprised at the light pastry aroma that had my tummy growling.

“You slept okay?” Mr. Finch asked as he placed a few crackers on a plate.

“Yes, thank you.”

I hugged my arms and glanced around the kitchen. Should I sit? What did he want me to do?

“Take a seat.” He waved at the island. “Wherever you feel comfortable. Breakfast isn’t homemade as I don’t care for cooking and neither does Reggie, but I ran out to get you two something to eat before school.”

I eyed the stool at the island dubiously. It was ridiculously high, and not meant for huge alphas who didn’t expect to have tiny omegas running around their house with their short legs and causing all kinds of problems.

“You’re not sitting.” He put a steaming mug on the counter before me.

I lowered my eyes. “I can’t.”

“You can’t sit? Why?”

I bit my bottom lip. “I’m too short.”

“Oh. Oh!” He nodded in understanding and came around the island. Before I could stop him, he lifted me and set me on the chair. “Is that better?”

My stomach fluttered, and it had nothing to do with the food. It was all him and how close he was to me. My nostrils opened, greedy for a smell of him.

Oh no. Oh no.

“Yes, better,” I replied after too long a silence.

“We may need to use the dining room from now on. I had the island customized for my height.”

“It’s your home,” I murmured. “I’d never find fault with it.” I stared down at the liquid in the mug he’d placed before me. “What’s this?”

“Peppermint tea. I remember you were having trouble with morning sickness, and this is what my ex used when he was pregnant with Reggie.”

“Does it work?”

“He swears by it. And you can eat the saltines. They should stay down.”

“Thank you.”

I sipped on the tea, which went down like a warm hug. I smiled and drank some more, relieved when my stomach didn’t revolt. It had been causing quite a riot lately.

“Reggie should join us in a bit,” he said. “He’s eating in his room. I thought the scent of the bacon and eggs might be too pungent for you.”

“I’m sorry for being a bother.”

“You’re not. I’m sure life’s not what any of us expected it to be at this moment, but there’s no reason for anyone to be miserable with what’s happened. We’ll work it out. I promise.”

I blinked furiously at the tears that rushed to my eyes, and when he turned his back, I swiped them away. He was such a good father. My parents had been put to the test, and they’d failed epically. I’d never thought they would actually go through with their threats and kick me out, but they had. Every waking minute of the last two days had filled me with terror. Until now.

“Mr. Finch.”

“Call me Ethan. No need for formalities.”

I couldn’t do it. Ethan seemed so real. So more within reach than Mr. Finch, and it was inappropriate to go there. Not only was he Reggie’s father, the grandfather of my unborn child, but also so much older.

What the hell’s wrong with me?

“Did you want to say something?”

“Just to thank you for letting me stay here last night.” I stared down into my teacup. “I don’t have anywhere else to go, and that place was horrid, but there was a roof and a door.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s all behind you now, and you’re safe.”

“I’ll get a job and be out of here soon, find somewhere safe for me and the baby.” But where was I going to get a job? If I didn’t graduate, how would I follow through with my dreams? And who was going to pay me enough money to rent an apartment all by myself. If I was lucky, I wouldn’t end up starving myself or my child.

Maybe they were right, and I should give up the baby.

“Maybe I should…” But I couldn’t even get the words out.

“Maybe you should what?”

I shook my head. “Do you want me to get rid of it? I told Reggie it was my decision, and I don’t expect anything from you both. I just want to be able to keep my baby, but if you don’t think…”

“Hey.” Ethan walked over to the island and stopped in front of me. “My opinion doesn’t matter here. You’re the one who’s going to be most affected by this, so that decision is yours alone to make, but whatever you choose, we’ll support you.” He glanced toward the entrance of the kitchen. “Right, Reggie?”

Reggie shuffled into the kitchen, bright red spots on his cheeks. “Right.”

But I didn’t believe him at all. His expression was so tight, and his lips one straight line. He obviously didn’t want me to keep the baby, and I got it. Things would be much easier if I didn’t, but life would always be one big challenge, right?

“Have a seat.”

Reggie pulled out a chair at the other end of the island without a word. I crunched down hard on a saltine and chewed away to resist the urge to flee.

“Now I know this might be a very uncomfortable discussion for both of you, but we still need to have it,” Ethan said, his tone gentle yet serious. “You both have a responsibility here, but more than anything, we need to know what you want, Cody, so we can support you.”

When was the last time what I wanted mattered to someone? I glanced from Ethan to Reggie. One seemed genuinely ready to accept whatever decision I made, and the other looked about ready to throw up on the counter.

“I don’t know.”

“It’s not so hard to decide,” Reggie muttered. “Do you really want to have a baby at nineteen?”

I wanted the baby, period. It didn’t matter what age I was. Why was that so wrong?

“Reggie, unless you’re the one carrying a baby, you’re here to listen and to support.”

“So, it doesn’t matter that I don’t want to be a father?”

“It takes more than donating sperm to be a father.” Ethan’s voice was hard.

“Well, maybe I don’t want to be like you,” Reggie cried. “Maybe I don’t want to have a kid, then let someone else raise them for half their life. Problem solved by not having a kid.”

My jaw dropped at the animosity Reggie spewed toward his father. Whoa, had I stumbled into something? Poor Ethan recoiled from the words, flinching. My hands shook, and I dropped the saltine.

“That’s not fair to me, Reggie.”

“And it was fair to me to leave everything I knew and go live with Dad without anyone asking me what I wanted?” Reggie pushed away from the counter. “For the record, if anyone had bothered to ask me, I’d have chosen you, but you didn’t choose me. You didn’t want me. So, maybe I got that from you in not wanting this child. I don’t want to be a father.”

He stalked out of the kitchen, shoulders hunched over. Silence descended in the kitchen. Ethan’s face was pale, and his eyes were devastated. Clearly, this wasn’t what he’d expected this morning. Did he have no clue Reggie felt this way?

“You should go to him,” I said softly. “He seems really hurt.”

He nodded and, without a word, went after his son. When they were gone, I dropped my shoulders, letting go of the tension. As much as I understood Reggie’s perspective more and why he didn’t want a child, I couldn’t allow his opinion to influence whether or not I had this baby. I didn’t expect anything from him.

I devoured the rest of my saltine and drank all the tea. I was at the sink washing up when footsteps thudded behind me, and I swiveled around.

“Did everything work out?”

Ethan grimaced and ran a hand over his face. “Goes to show that raising a kid is one of the toughest things in the world. I thought I’d done as much as I could, given the situation.”

My shoulders stiffened. “I’m keeping the baby.”

“Oh god, no, I wasn’t saying that to influence your decision. I can’t take back the years of Reggie living with my ex. I know he was hurt by the split but not to this extent.”

“How old was he?”

“When we got divorced? He was ten.”

“Very young, but I’m sure he doesn’t hate you or anything. He’s just lashing out in anger. You seem to have a close relationship, and he was always bragging about the cool dad you are.”

“It’s getting there, but it wasn’t easy. I just didn’t feel it was right for me to make demands of my ex to stay in town when he wanted to move away from the disaster of our marriage.”

I wanted to hear more about this mysterious man he’d loved. Why had he classified their marriage as a disaster?

“Sorry, I shouldn’t be talking to you about this.” He scratched at the back of his head. “We’re discussing you and what we’re going to do.”

“We’re not doing anything.” I jutted out my chin, ready to fight him over this if he insisted. “I’m having a baby. In fact, I should go.”

He blocked the entrance. “Why do I have a feeling I’m ruining everything this morning? Why don’t we start over?”

“You can’t make me give up this baby. It’s my choice.”

He nodded. “It is, and I’d never do such a thing. I’m here to support you, that’s all.”

I eyed him warily. “But Reggie doesn’t want to be a part of this.”

“I’m still going to be the granddad.” He grimaced. “Oh fuck, I’m going to be a granddad.” Then he laughed, and I stared at him. What was happening right now?

“Sorry.” He shook his head. “We have a few months to work everything out. How far along are you?”

“Almost three months.”

“So, another four to go. When’s your next prenatal appointment?”

I shrugged and looked away, embarrassed.

“You haven’t had a prenatal appointment?”

“I didn’t know what to do.”

He gave me one of those patient and understanding smiles that made me feel that every dumb thing I’d ever done would still be okay.

“It’s all right. Why don’t we skip today’s class? We have a few things we need to get done.”