Don’t Let Me Break by Linda Verji
CHAPTER 24
Sebastian left hospital the next afternoon.
Though he was well enough to take care of himself, Marley took him home. After settling him in the living room, she kept bustling around the house trying to make him more comfortable.
At this very moment, she was standing in front of the TV with her face scrunched up with worry. “Are you really sure you’re warm enough?”
“Marley, you already got me two blankets.” Sebastian laughed. “I think that’s enough.”
“The doctor said you needed to keep warm,” she reminded him.
“He said to keep warm… not hot,” he countered with an amused grin.
“What about the soup?” she asked. “How does it taste? Should I make you something else?”
“The soup is great,” he reassured. Actually, it was better than great and worlds apart from the watery stuff the hospital had fed him. “In fact, I think I might need some more after this bowl.”
“Okay, I’ll warm it up then when you’re done with that one, I can give you a refill.” She hurried off to the kitchen.
While he ate and watched TV, she washed dishes and cleaned the kitchen.
“You don’t need to do all that,” Sebastian protested when she asked him for the vacuum cleaner so she could clean the rest of the apartment for him.
“You’re sick,” she said. “You won’t be able to clean for a few days, and I don’t want you staying in a dirty place.”
“I’m not that sick,” he returned, “and I can do it myself.” When she gave him a skeptical look, he emphasized, “Really, I can clean the house myself.”
Marley didn’t say anything for quite a while. Though she watched him in silence, her pensive gaze made it obvious that her brain was spinning fast. It was as if she was trying to decide whether to bring up something that was bothering her or not. Finally, she made her decision.
“If you’re afraid that I won’t do it the way you like,” she said, “I promise I will. And I’ll make sure I put everything right back where it was when I’m done.”
To say he was startled by how observant she was would be an understatement.
Yes, he liked things to be done in a certain way. Because he knew that his requests could be considered troublesome, he preferred to do those things himself rather than cause conflict. Most people took years to notice that side of him. Some people never even saw it. How had Marley seen it so fast? Was he that transparent to her?
“I promise,” she repeated. “I’ll be careful while I’m cleaning.”
Still confused about how she’d caught him, he nodded. “Okay.”
She went off to get the vacuum cleaner and soon, she had his house looking spick and span and his laundry done. As promised, she left his things just as she’d found them but cleaner.
Once she was done, he patted the space next to him. “Come and sit down.”
With a smile, she walked over and settled next to him. When he put his arm around her shoulders, she easily melted into the side of his body. He smiled because of the warmth that immediately soared through his body. When he looked down, he found Marley smiling too. He pressed a fast kiss to her lips. With a happy sigh, Marley cuddled deeper into him.
The mystery series that was playing on TV was interesting enough that it quickly held her attention. It was no wonder that when he tried to draw her attention to him by calling her name, she answered with a distracted, “Hmm?”
“How did you know?” he asked as his fingers danced on her upper arm.
Her gaze stayed on the TV. “How did I know what?”
Sebastian asked, “How did you know that I don’t like it when people mess up my stuff?”
She shrugged. “I just knew.”
“But how?”
She looked up at him. “I don’t know… the way everything in your house is so neat and clean. The way nothing is out of place. The way your wardrobe is color-coded. The way even your spices have their labels facing the same way. It must’ve taken a lot of effort and time to arrange your stuff that way, so I just figured that you’d hate it if someone disarranged it.”
Her assessment was right on the money, and he couldn’t help but stare at her in bemused awe.
When she saw his surprise, she asked, “What?”
“I’m just surprised you noticed,” he said. “No one else ever noticed that fast.”
Her eyes still on him, she watched him for some time then softly asked, “Is it that you’re neat or is it something a little more?”
“Something a little more,” he admitted. He’d never discussed his oddest habit with anyone else. But with Marley he was so comfortable that he found himself explaining, “Actually, it’s just a side effect of living with my father…”
Sebastian went on to describe just how he’d developed the trait. When William was having one of his schizophrenic breaks, he often had hallucinations that the villains in his books had come alive and were now stalking him. He’d convince himself that he and the boys weren’t in the house alone, and that someone was planning to murder them. Slight changes in the way their home was arranged would only confirm these hallucinations and make his symptoms worse.
Leaving a spoon on the counter, turning a spice bottle so that the label was facing backwards instead of forward, setting shoes on the doormat instead of in the shoe drawer… even little things like those were enough to make William fly off the handle. Both Sebastian and Matías had learnt to put things back the way they found them. The habit had followed them into adulthood and their significant others always erroneously tugged them as having OCD.
All of Sebastian’s previous partners had hated the habit. They didn’t understand his nervousness whenever they didn’t put things right where they found it. They found his habit of following after them and straightening things to be annoying. Worse, he made an effort to mute the habit while at work, but then became unbearable to live with (in their words) when at home which made them feel like he didn’t value them as much as he valued his workmates. One girlfriend had even broken up with him over it. What they didn’t understand was that at work he forced himself to seem ‘normal’. But when in his own home, he wanted to be comfortable, and order made him comfortable.
Even as Sebastian explained all this to Marley, he felt a thread of nervousness. Would she find him odd too? Was this flaw too much for her to handle?
His heart in his throat, he said, “I hope I didn’t scare you by telling you all that.”
“Scare me?” Marley let out a soft laugh. “I think I’m the last person who would be scared by anyone’s little habits. If anyone is winning the Scary Habits Awards, it should be me. As you already know, I have a habit of changing into a whole other person. Now that’s scary! Can you beat it?”
Sebastian’s nervousness disappeared in an instant and relief took its place. He laughed. “No, you win.”
For the first time in his life, Sebastian felt like he’d found the right person for him. This was the first time he could laugh with someone about things that everyone else thought were horrible or strange. This was the first time that he felt so connected with someone. It was the first time he felt that he was with someone who could understand him and his shortcomings, someone who wouldn’t judge him for being less than perfect. Being with Marley felt like finally finding a puzzle piece that had been missing for a long time. When he was with her, he felt complete.
“Ugh!” Marley groaned when her gaze settled on the clock above the TV. She moved from his arms to sit up. “It’s getting late. I think I have to go home.”
“You’re going home?” he protested. Disappointment had him sitting up too. “Why?”
“Because it’s my home,” she returned rather obviously.
“Can’t you stay the night?”
“I haven’t been home since yesterday,” Marley reminded him. “Kenny will wonder where I am.”
It was almost as if Kenny knew they were talking about her because right then Marley’s phone rang. Kenny’s name flashed on the screen. Marley leaned forward and picked the phone.
“Hey, Kenny,” she answered.
“Hey,” her sister returned.
Sebastian was close enough to Marley that he could hear everything the other woman was saying.
Kenny asked, “Are you still with Sebastian?”
“Yeah” Marley snuck a look at him. “Why?”
The other woman said, “I just wanted to let you know that I have a five p.m. meeting at work so I’ll be gone by the time you get home.”
“So that means I won’t see you until tomorrow morning?” Marley asked with a note of disappointment in her voice. Meanwhile, Sebastian began to smile.
“Yeah, sorry,” Kenny apologized. “Are you sure you’ll be okay without me there?”
“I’m an adult, Kenny.” Marley laughed. “Why wouldn’t I be okay?”
“I mean… with everything that’s going on… someone is after you,” Kenny reminded her. “Are you sure you’ll be safe there alone?”
In an instant, Sebastian’s smile dropped and Marley stiffened. They’d both forgotten that just yesterday someone had tried to kill her.
“Can’t you spend the night at Sebastian’s or maybe at a friend’s?” Kenny suggested. “I really don’t like the thought of you being alone here.”
“I’ll- I’ll be fine,” Marley assured her sister. However, Sebastian didn’t miss the slight stammer in her words. That was always a sure sign of her being nervous. “Our- our place is really safe. We have CCTV everywhere, remember?”
“I know, but it’s just…” Kenny sighed. “Okay, if you’re sure you’re fine then okay. But at least get Sebastian to drive you home so you’re not alone on the way there.”
“I can’t.” Marley glanced at Sebastian again. “He’s unwell. I’ll just take a cab.”
“No, no, no. I don’t trust cabs. They’re driven by strangers.” Kenny offered, “I’ll send someone from the club to take you home. Text me Sebastian’s address.”
Marley agreed immediately. “Okay.”
“When you get home, make sure you lock the door,” her sister urged. “Don’t open for anyone unless it’s me.”
“Don’t worry, Kenny,” Marley assured. “I’ll be fine.”
Kenny took a deep, shaky breath then said, “Okay.”
After reminding Marley to send Sebastian’s address again, Kenny ended the call. Marley immediately began to type out a text with his address.
Sebastian stopped her. “Don’t.”
Confused, Marley met his gaze. “Why?”
“Stay over tonight.” Before he’d been trying to get her to spend the night because he was reluctant to let her go. Now, he was actually worried. He said, “Your sister is right. You shouldn’t be alone right now.”
Marley studied him. “Are you sure you’re not keeping me here just so we can- we can-”
Though she didn’t finish the sentence, the wary look in her eyes and the way her body was tilted slightly away from him left no doubt where her mind had gone.
Despite the worry bubbling within him, Sebastian found himself chuckling. “No, Marley. That’s not why I’m trying to keep you here with me.”
It would be a lie to say that he hadn’t thought of sex with Marley. Last night, it was all he could think about. And tonight, he’d probably fantasize about it too. But he wouldn’t do anything until Marley was ready. And she obviously wasn’t.
“Trust me. I just want you safe,” he assured. “You can sleep in the guest room if it makes you feel safer.”
Marley watched him for a moment then smiled. “I trust you.”
Which is how, they ended up sleeping in the same bed.