The Liar Next Door by Nicola Marsh

Five

Frankie

NOW

I may have forgiven Andre for his infidelity years ago but I developed a bad habit not long after we reconciled.

I watch him.

Not in a creepy way—I don’t stalk him or follow him. I just watch when we’re at a party or a special occasion or at a work function; like now, while I’m getting a drink, and he’s surrounded by neighbors, the center of attention and loving it.

I watch to see how he interacts with women, wondering if I’m missing something, feeling like a gullible fool despite him being a devoted dad and husband since his indiscretion. He’s proven once before he’s open to temptation and a small part of me is resentful that what he’s done in the past has turned me into a watchful wife.

It annoys me that I still get the urge to scrutinize him. I don’t do it often these days, not like the first year or two after he confessed, but when there are new people around—new women, more precisely—I find myself following Andre’s every move.

Today, I don’t know what to make of what I see. He’s effusive and charming towards everyone, but standoffish with Celeste. Nothing overt, but even when she’s in the same circle with others chatting, he’s angling his body away from her, as if trying to exclude her. Or I could be imagining the whole thing and fatigue is making me see things that aren’t there.

It’s not that I expect Andre to click with everybody he meets but he’s gregarious. I’m used to seeing him draw everyone around him into his sphere. Ironic, that I ended up with a husband just like my father when I once vowed to find the complete opposite.

Then again, I’d tried the opposite years ago, and that didn’t turn out well either.

It took me several years of marriage to work out I’d been so desperate to escape my folks and the house I’d grown up in that I’d deluded myself into believing a lie, more enamored with the idea of being in love than loving my first husband for real.

Now’s not the time to lament my mistakes though. I’m overthinking Andre’s behavior, and as I see him laugh at something Celeste says, it confirms I’m seeing things that aren’t there. Rehashing a time when we both screwed up—even in my head—isn’t productive and is making me oversensitive.

Besides, from my brief interactions with Celeste and Saylor, I like them. I have no reason to think they’re interested in my husband. Celeste is circumspect, Saylor is outgoing. Celeste has that hint of weary motherhood about her whereas Saylor is all wide-eyed wonder and excitement. A week of sleepless nights when the baby is born will knock that shine right off. It might sound harsh, but it’s realistic. I adore Luna but those early days when I struggled to breastfeed and she was colicky… they were nightmarish.

That’s the time I would’ve expected a husband prone to straying to be tempted, but after Luna’s birth Andre had been the model father. He’d taken on as many freelance jobs as possible so he could work from home. He changed diapers and rocked Luna and paced the floor with her for hours at a time so I could grab some sleep. He’d been my rock and I need to remember that. He adores Luna as much as I do. He dotes on her and she’s a daddy’s girl. It vindicates the choice I made all those years ago.

Lloyd slaps Andre on the back, a gesture that’s the epitome of male bonding behavior, before moving to a group of neighbors who live across the park from us. Andre’s alone with Saylor now and I notice she becomes more animated, her hands moving as she talks, punctuating her words. Thankfully, Andre’s behavior doesn’t change.

Until Celeste leans closer to tell him something.

His shoulders stiffen, like someone has stuck a poker down the back of his shirt. He’s still smiling but it’s more forced and his gaze is wary.

Something about Celeste is definitely putting him off. Have they already met? He went out on a job late last night. Maybe he bumped into her while she was moving in? But why didn’t either of them mention it when I introduced them earlier?

My mind immediately takes off on a tangent, giving them some torrid past they’ve hidden from me. Is she the one? He never told me who he’d slept with and I didn’t want to know. I was dealing with my own issues at the time. Is his standoffish behavior a sign?

I don’t like being this woman, the suspicious wife leaping to irrational conclusions. I need to subdue my insecurities and focus on the positives: that my marriage came through the worst of an ordeal that tested us, and Andre and I are stronger for it. We’re in a good place now and Luna completes us.

Dwelling on the past and mistrusting my husband isn’t good for any of us.