All the Cuts and Scars We Hide by Garry Michael
Two: Kai
I’m Not In Hawai’i Anymore
Sailboats in different colors and sizes passed by, floating like red and white butterflies in the bay. Waves crashed over the rocky beach of the San Juan Islands, spraying mists of salty water on my face. In the seven days since I’d arrived from Oahu, I had to constantly stop myself from booking the next flight home.
I can't go back.
I could still hear my cousin Mikaela’s voice in my head. You can’t run away from this Kai. You can put distance between us, but you can’t run away from this, not even if you move to Mars tomorrow.
I shook my head and focused on the present, a task that was easier said than done, especially when the past was the very reason for the present.
Everything around this island was different. The color of the cold water was a darker shade of blue compared to the warm turquoise ocean I learned how to swim in when I was younger. Towering black rocks dominated the dark brown beach, a far cry from the white powder we used to build sandcastles with and relax on after hours of surfing. Even the waves were tamer than the ones I used to ride. The morning breeze was cooler than the tropical ones I used to wake up to. But what it offered that Hawai’i couldn’t, was the fresh start I needed.
I blinked away the tears that were starting to form and reminded myself of why I was standing on a beach twenty-five hundred miles away from home.
Fresh start.
I took my shoes and socks off and rolled my pants past my ankles, walked closer to the waves, and dipped my feet to feel the water. The ice-cold temperature of it caused me to shiver and I immediately retreated them from the freezing shore. I’m definitely not in Hawai’i anymore and that thought sobered me more than the bone-chilling water temperature. I’m on my own now.
I ran toward the driftwood log where I’d put my shoes and socks and hurried to put them back on. I continued my walk toward the wooden boardwalk which was half the size of a football field. I passed by a couple heading in the opposite direction and waved at them because I needed some form of human acknowledgment.The one thing that was the same between Hawai'i and this island was the people. They all seemed to be friendly and kind even to newcomers like me.
I decided to head out to the coffee shop called The SoundCafé to try some of the local treats. My landlord, Sam, had recommended it when I asked her about a great place for coffee when I picked up my keys in her office in one of the buildings along Main Street.
***
“You should check out The Sound Café two blocks south of the boardwalk. They’re one of the best on the island,” she announced proudly. To my surprise, she leaned closer and held my arm, the jasmine scent of her perfume reminding me of Ma’s. “Starbucks moved in a couple of years ago and they couldn’t even compete. They tried, but we Islanders support each other, you know,” she whispered as if giving me the island’s best-kept secret. The wrinkles on the sides of her eyes deepened when she gave me the sweetest smile.
“That’s good to know. Thanks for the tip.”
“Of course, Kai, you’re one of us now. Where’d you park?” She craned her neck and her beautiful locks flowed around her shoulders. It was hard to tell how old she was. She could be in her forties or fifties, but her smile and the way she was put together with a loose short sleeve emerald silk blouse tucked into a pair of skinny dark denim jeans finished with the dark green heels made her look younger. Whatever her age, she looked fabulous.
“Um, I don’t drive,” I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat and ignored how my stomach turned to knots at the mention of driving. “Airport shuttle dropped me off.”
“Oh, you’re not moving in until later then?” she asked, confusion drawn on her face.
“No, I’m moving in today. This is all I have,” I explained, pointing at the two oversized, packed to the brim, luggage and the duffle bag sitting on top of one of them.
My cellphone in my back pocket vibrated and a notification popped up on my watch. “And my bed and couch are on its way,” I said and showed her the message on my Apple Watch.
She smiled once again while shaking her head. “You millennials are something else. I’ve always wanted one of those, but my kids can’t seem to find the time to teach me.” Hurt flashed across her face briefly before she schooled her expression.
“You know what, it’s very user-friendly. It’s a bit intimidating at first, but it’s very easy to learn,” I took my watch off my wrist and turned it on, and showed her.
She stood closer to my side, her eyes bouncing from me to the watch as I explained.
“You can tap this button to show your apps, then to go back, you just hit this.”
“Just like an iPhone,” her eyes wide as she grinned.
“Exactly like it. You can sync your iPhone with it. If you like, I can help you set it up if you still want one of these.”
“Oh, Kai. I don’t want to impose.”
“Not at all, think of it as a bribe. I’m going to need a lot of help learning about this town.”
“You’re sweet. I hope you make Friday Harbor your new home. The ladies will love you. Athletically built, dark, and handsome.”
“Do you think guys will like me too?” I winked. I’d always been comfortable with my sexuality, but I didn’t know how a small town like Friday Harbor in the San Juan Islands treated gays. This beautiful coastal town was only hours from Seattle, one of the most progressive cities in the US, but it was hard to know. I held my breath as I awaited her response.
“Well, Kai, they’d be crazy not to. You’ll love it here.”
***
Two blocks from the wooden boardwalk that separated the beach from the town, The Sound Café looked fresh out of a travel magazine. The three rectangular windows were covered by dark green awnings, a perfect contrast to the four oversized white umbrellas that sat over the cast iron tables. Each glass top table displayed a vase of fresh summer flowers. The matching chairs were an intricate pattern of sparrows sculpted from metal rods. Above the antique wooden door with two slivers of faded tinted glass, was a hand-painted sign with a scripted font that read, The Sound Café.
The black metal bell hanging over the door, announcing patrons' arrival, rang and the barista waved me in.
“What can I get for ya, hon?” the friendly barista asked the moment I reached the counter. Her crimson red lipstick stood out from her pale skin. Her black tank top showed the impressive art on her arms. The colors were so vibrant, you couldn’t help but admire the hummingbirds hovering over the colorful flower tattoos she had. She gave me the warmest smile after she plucked a pen from her bun. Everyone on this island is really nice.
“What do you recommend? I’ve never been here before.” I beamed, returning her friendliness.
The person waiting in line behind me groaned. Okay, maybe not everyone is nice.
I was about to look back, but the barista started to give me the rundown of what’s good to have.
“We make the best muffins, we have about twelve flavors, but you’re a bit late,” she explained before bending over to check the remaining selection, which by the looks of it were just plain bagels and a small variety of cookies. “We normally sell out by nine o’clock,” she continued.
I checked the wall clock and I couldn’t believe that it was a quarter past ten. My circadian rhythm was still on Hawai’i time which was three hours earlier than the local time. “I’ll come back tomorrow then, will you be here?” I asked, trying to make friends.
“Oh, come on!” the voice behind me grumbled.
I turned, ready to give this guy a piece of my mind, and was met by muscle. The sexy man had his arms crossed, accentuating the biceps that rippled beneath his tight blue t-shirt. His jawline was covered by well-trimmed facial hair that matched the color of his brown and slightly wavy hair. Those red lips looked supple, luring me to kiss them. Truth be told, I’m a sucker for tall guys. He easily had at least six inches on my five-foot-ten frame. He was wearing tinted sunglasses so I wasn’t able to see his eyes, but I couldn’t miss the scowl on his face. I hated to admit it was a sexy scowl.
The sexy-cranky man motioned to the cash register. Speechless, I let him go by.
“Hi Andrea, you got my order?” the sexy-cranky-gorgeous man asked the barista who went by Andrea.
“Sure thing, babe,” she responded, and I was a little dismayed that she didn’t call him by his name. I didn’t know why I wanted to know either.
The sexy-cranky-gorgeous-suave man moved with precision, swiping his card while maneuvering a pink box in one hand with two to-go cups in a cupboard drink carrier stacked on top. I watched him curiously and when he turned around to leave, all I could do was smile. He froze for a few seconds while staring back at me.
“So, you’re the reason why they’re out of muffins,” I joked, trying to lighten the mood. Because as much as this man annoyed me, I didn’t want to make enemies.
But the stranger didn’t crack. Nope. All I got out of him was a quick once over before he headed towards the door. Jesus. I watched him disappear.
I returned my attention to Andrea and let her know that I would be back earlier tomorrow to try their famous muffins. “My name is Kai by the way,” I introduced myself and offered her my hand.
“It's Andrea,” she smiled and accepted my handshake. “I’ll see you early tomorrow!” she called out before I was out of the café.
On the street, I looked both ways, but the man had disappeared. I couldn’t decide whether I was relieved or disappointed.