Dare Me by Ella Frank
Kieran
BY THE TIME Saturday afternoon rolled around, the dark cloud that had been following me was a permanent fixture over my head. If I was smart, I would’ve called and begged out of today’s little family get-together. But clearly I was no genius, considering my choices over the past few days—hell, weeks.
I thanked my driver and climbed out of the less-than-clean Uber that had picked me up, and was more determined than ever to get better so I could get back to driving myself around town. Then I stood at the bottom of Bailey’s drive and stared up at the house.
This was the last place I wanted to be right now. Not because I didn’t like hanging out with these guys, but because I knew they were going to make a big deal over the fire and my shoulder injury, and I didn’t want to be the center of attention. I was burying too many secrets under this dark cloud of mine, and if they looked too close, they just might see what bolt of lightning had set off this chain of events.
But had I taken my own advice? Nope. So here I was standing in Bailey’s drive like a total dumbass—like I said, not very smart—or maybe I’d just blame it on the pain meds. Yeah, that sounded plausible, right?
Knowing I couldn’t stand out here all afternoon, I made my way up the drive to the front door and knocked.
Xander pulled it open and flashed that famous smile my way. “There he is, the hero of the week.”
I snorted and shook my head as Xander stepped aside and let me in. “Hardly a hero when I was the one taken away in an ambulance.”
“Stop it. We’re just thankful a dislocated shoulder was the worst of it. That fire was a monster. The fact that you guys ran inside of it and managed to pull people out makes you heroes.”
“Nah. We’re just doing our job.”
“Well, it’s one we can never thank you enough for. But today your family is going to try, so let me be the first.” Xander gave me a hug, careful not to bump my arm. Then he pulled back and gestured to it. “How is your shoulder?”
“Throbbing like a motherfucker, but they gave me some really awesome pain meds.”
He chuckled and gestured toward the kitchen. “Come on, everyone’s in here.”
Yeah, I could hear them, which was why I’d been lingering. When Bailey called yesterday to check up on me, he’d told me they were going to put together a special afternoon in my honor—another reason I hadn’t skipped—and as we made our way toward the kitchen, the delicious aromas of garlic and onion greeted me.
Meatballs. Yum. Okay, so maybe showing up here today hadn’t been such a bad idea. If there was one meal I loved above all others, it was Bailey’s meatballs and marinara sauce—a jar of Prego and some extra garlic and onions, a.k.a. perfection in my eyes.
“Ah! See.” Sean glanced our way as we walked into the kitchen. “What’d I tell you? Kieran’s got a hard head. Here he is all safe and sound, and you’ve all been worrying yourselves about nothing. Shit, I bet that sling’s just for sympathy.”
I flipped Sean off as Xander shook his head. “Excuse me, but correct me if I’m wrong. Weren’t you the first one to call when you saw that fire? So don’t even try to play Mister Indifferent.”
“Eh, I was just making sure you didn’t miss out on a breaking news story.”
“Yes, because there was a real danger of that.”
My big brother. Sure, Sean might act like an ass, but deep down we all knew he had feelings. Like deep, deep down.
“We knew he was okay. We were just worried. That fire was huge,” Bailey said from the opposite counter. He was busy balling up the meatballs and placing them into a glass baking dish as Henri stirred the marinara sauce.
“I gotta admit, I’m glad I wasn’t the one running into that thing.” Henri shook his head. “I’ve been in some pretty…dicey positions. But nothing I know how to do would get me out of that.”
“Yeah, we all know what your specialties are, Boudreaux.” Sean smirked. “Give him a gun and a getaway car and he’s your man.”
Henri narrowed his eyes on his ex-handler and soon-to-be quasi-brother-in-law. “I didn’t hear you complain’ when we took down rAz, Detective Dick.”
“True. But that’s because it got me a pay raise. Thanks for that, by the way.” As Sean saluted Henri with his beer, I made my way over to Bailey and did a quick count of the meatballs.
“You better be making enough for more than four balls each.”
Bailey’s lips twitched, and when I realized what I’d just said, I started to correct myself, but Xander was waiting to pounce.
“You sure you can handle four balls at a time? Two seems like it would be a challenge with that hurt arm of yours.”
Heat crept up my neck as his lips tugged to one side. Fucker.
I’d been pretty adamant the last time the two of us spoke that Bash and I were just friends. But I’d known when I showed up here today that Xander would remind me that he knew better, or at least thought he did.
Not that Bash and I were even friends anymore.
I plastered a fake smile on my face. “I can handle them just fine. But if worse comes to worst, maybe you can help me out.”
“Like hell he can,” Sean piped up, and threw an arm around Xander, who’d just stolen his beer for a sip. “Go get someone else to play nursemaid. I know how Xander gets around a wounded hero.”
Xander just about choked. “I think it has to do with who the hero is.”
Sean kissed the side of his head. “Damn right.”
Bailey turned on the faucet and quickly washed his hands before moving over to the saucepan where Henri was gently stirring the marinara.
“Would you like to try it, chef?” Henri brought the wooden spoon up to Bailey’s lips.
He had a quick taste then nodded. “That’s delicious.”
Henri took Bailey’s chin in his hand and pressed a kiss to his lips. “Hmm. Agreed.”
Oh, for fuck’s sake. Someone get me a bucket. All this lovey-dovey shit was making my stomach twist.
“You okay?” Sean asked.
I looked over to see him and Xander frowning at me. Shit, had I said that out loud?
“Yeah, why?”
“You groaned like you ate something bad, dude. You need to use the john?”
“No, asshole.” Think Kieran, think. “Arm was aching, that’s all.”
Sean, Bay, and Henri all nodded, seeming to buy that. But Xander’s expression cried bullshit. And I had a feeling he saw right through my lie.
Jesus, could someone please get me the hell out of here? Maybe I could think up some kind of excuse and leave. I could text Olsen and have him call me and pretend to need me for—what? A paperwork emergency?
It looked like I was stuck here.
“I’m guessing you can’t have a drink, right?” Bailey asked as he headed to the fridge.
“Yeah, probably shouldn’t mix it with the meds, but I’ll take a Coke if you’ve got it.”
He nodded and grabbed one out, then replaced everyone else’s beer. “Okay, well, we just need to put the sauce over the meatballs and get them in the oven. So if you want to head out to the deck—”
“Actually,” Xander said, looking to Sean, who nodded, “before we head out there, Sean and I have something to tell you all.”
“You’re pregnant,” Henri deadpanned as he finished pouring the sauce over the meatballs and dumped the empty pan in the sink.
“Idiot.” Sean chuckled, but was clearly too excited by whatever they had to tell us to put much heart into the insult.
“No.” Xander wrapped an arm around Sean’s waist. “We’ve set a date for our wedding.”
“Oh my God,” Bailey shouted, a bright smile spreading across his lips. He raced around the end of the counter toward Xander—his best friend, who would soon officially be both his and my brother-in-law. “That’s wonderful news. When? Soon?”
Xander nodded. “We’re thinking fall.”
“As in this fall?”
“Yep, a couple of months from now.” Sean looked over at me with my hand clamped tight around the Coke bottle. I was thankful for the prop, because it gave me something to concentrate on other than the fact that everyone’s love life seemed to be turning up roses while mine fell apart.
Hang on a second. Love life? I don’t fucking think so.
“So what do you think, Kieran?” Sean said, and everyone looked in my direction.
I tried for my best smile and hoped like hell it looked more convincing than it felt.
“You think you can narrow down your list to a special plus-one, and find a lovely lady to bring to your big brother’s wedding?”
My mind immediately flashed to a sparkling red Valentino gown, but I quickly shoved it aside. “How about you just concentrate on the fact that your list will soon be nonexistent, and leave me to worry about mine.”
Henri moved up alongside me and replaced my Coke with a beer. I took it. “One won’t hurt, and if you’re feeling anything like I am, I need some alcohol to wrap my head around the fact anyone is brave enough to marry your brother.”
No shit. As I twisted the top off the beer and leaned back against the fridge, Xander looked my way, and I thought I caught a flash of sympathy and…understanding in his eyes.
I took a long swig of the beer, pain meds be damned.
OKAY, SO THOSE warnings on the side of the pill bottles that say don’t mix meds with alcohol? They really should be followed at all times. Something I would take into great consideration when my spinning head finally came to a standstill and I was able to tie my own damn shoe again.
As it was, Xander was walking me to the door of my loft while Sean waited down in the car by the curb, after they’d kindly offered to drive my inebriated ass back home.
So tonight hadn’t really gone as planned. But the good news was that I probably wouldn’t remember most of it tomorrow. After Sean and Xander’s big announcement, most of the night had been spent talking about wedding plans, bachelor parties, groomsmen, blah blah blah. You name it, they talked about it, while I sat there with a really big smile on my face and pretended I wasn’t dying to be anywhere else.
There was no way I was about to be a surly asshole for one of the happiest moments of their life, and just because I was nursing a wounded ego, a pissy mood, and a bum shoulder didn’t mean I needed to bring that vibe around them.
So pills and alcohol. Don’t do that at home, kids. Sure, it made me happy, but it had also made me completely useless. I figured the guys let me get away with it by giving me a pass for a stressful week and a screwed-up arm.
Ahh, if only they knew the rest of it. I was pretty sure Xander knew, or at least suspected, but the rest of them—nada. I wondered how they would react to knowing that their womanizer of a brother had been left high and dry by a…guy.
They’d all get a kick out of that. Shit, I’d never hear the end of it.
“Right,” Xander said as we stopped just inside the loft. “You got it from here?”
I waved but swayed a little on my feet. When he went to grab me, I chuckled. “I’m just fucking with you.”
“Not funny, Kieran.”
“Kinda was.”
“Look, maybe you should come home with me and Sean.”
Oh God no, anything but that.“I’m good, really. Sean already texted Olsen, and he’s gonna be home in a little bit. I’ll be fine. I just want to sleep this off.”
Xander slipped his hands into his pockets and let out a sigh. “Are you sure?”
“Yep. One hundred percent. Again, super excited for you and Sean.”
“Thanks. We’re excited too.” Xander turned to head back to the front door, but stopped and looked back at me. “Kieran?”
“Hmm?”
“Other than the shoulder, everything else okay?”
Everything except Bash ditching my sorry ass.It seemed that my anger had now officially turned to self-pity. “Everything’s fine.”
Xander’s eyes narrowed. “You’d tell us if it wasn’t, right?”
“Course.”
“Okay, well, I’m going to text you in a few. Don’t go to sleep until Olsen gets here.”
“Yes, Mom.”
Xander waved and headed out the door, and I finally let out a sigh of relief. Finally, alone at last. I made my way into my room and tossed my phone onto the nightstand, and that was when I spotted Bash’s business card where I’d left it the night before.
I picked it up and ran my thumb over his name, my mind still buzzing as I thought about the last time I saw him after the fire. The worry in his eyes, the flash of hurt on his expression when he looked at Summer as she clung to me like I was her prize possession—
Wait, had I…had I been reading this entire thing wrong all this time? Maybe Bash hadn’t ditched me. Maybe he’d run. Maybe he’d been protecting himself from me and what I might do. Like, leave him, for Summer…
No, he knew better than that.
He knew I wouldn’t do anything like that.
But what if he didn’t?
I looked at the card and the address printed at the bottom of it, and before I knew what I was doing, I was online booking a plane ticket to South Haven, Georgia for tomorrow morning.
That’s right, kids: pills and alcohol don’t mix. But sometimes, they can make you do things you just might not do if you were thinking straight.
