Love, Comment, Subscribe by Cathy Yardley
CHAPTER 34
“Oh my God, thank you,” a woman said, surveying herself in the mirror. “I had no idea I could look like this!”
Lily smiled at Mikki. Mikki had approached her with the idea of doing a collab and helping out a small beauty boutique owned by a friend of his. They took samples of various foundations, shadows, blushes, and lipsticks, and the two of them offered free ten-minute makeovers for people willing to be in the video. They’d done about twenty makeovers over the course of the day, and she could already tell the before/after shots were going to be amazing.
“It’s our pleasure,” Lily said as Mikki gave the woman a hug and then presented her with a small, pretty paper bag that held the samples they’d used. The woman waved as she left, and Chloe, the owner of the boutique, ushered the last of the customers out of the store and locked the door, then leaned against it and let out a long exhalation.
“Oh my God,” Chloe said. “That was amazing! You two worked wonders!”
“The products are wonderful, Chloe,” Mikki said with a wink and a smile. “Thanks for letting us use your store and your samples.”
“You’re doing me a favor,” Chloe countered. “You’re promoting my store, and my products. And you did so many people’s makeup!”
Lily surreptitiously stretched a little. She had done a lot today. She’d almost avoided it, considering how much time she was spending down in Ponto, but she’d planned this video with Mikki at least six months ago, and they’d been friends too long for her to abandon it.
The fact that she’d even considered it showed just how much she’d changed since doing . . . whatever it was she was doing with Tobin.
“All right, now you have to tell me everything. That last video, where you were all but making out with him?” Mikki fanned himself with a hand. “Oh my God! I was so disappointed you didn’t actually kiss. I swear, that would probably get a billion views. You’ve got people invested in that ship.”
She cleared her throat. They’d edited out the kissing that had been caught on camera, instead recording an alternate ending—still seeming naked in bed, but this time Tobin shutting off the light and the whole scene fading to black. The commenters had gone absolutely bananas, and as predicted, the video had gone viral.
“Wanna grab something to eat?” Mikki said. “I’m starving.”
Chloe had to bow out, needing to get back to her husband and kids, so Lily and Mikki headed to a little Thai restaurant. She ordered a spicy green curry, and Mikki ordered pad thai. “So, what’s your next video?” Lily asked, taking a sip of her iced tea.
“Finishing up my classes,” he said. “Then, maybe take a nice long vacation before fall semester starts up again.”
Lily frowned. “Are you going to be filming on vacation, then?” That could be good, she realized. There were plenty of YouTubers who filmed on location, and it worked out well. “Maybe testing the makeup from other places? Or . . . ooh! Street fashion report?”
He tilted his head, taking a long draw of his diet soda. “Oh my God. I forgot you didn’t know.”
Lily blinked. “Didn’t know what?”
“I’m shutting down my channel,” he said. “You’ve been down in that little beach town, doing all your stuff with Tobin, so I just . . . I didn’t want to tell you over text, you know?”
“But why?” Lily wailed. “You’re doing so well!”
Mikki rolled his eyes as the food was put in front of them. “I do all right,” he says. “But I haven’t even gotten to a million subscribers, on YouTube or TikTok, or even Instagram. And let’s face it: you need at least a million to do anything as an influencer.”
She bit her lip, moving her curry around with her chopsticks. “You could get there, though,” she argued. “It just takes some time, and work, and collabs.”
“We both know it doesn’t ‘just’ take that,” Mikki said wryly. “You’ve been doing this for, what, eight years?”
“I wasn’t really serious about it the first two,” she said . . . well, lied, really.
“But your ‘not really serious’ is most people’s ‘utterly obsessed,’” Mikki said with a grin. “You realize that, don’t you?”
Lily fell silent. He might have a point.
“The thing is, if you’re not willing to be completely dedicated to this, you know that you can’t make it in this business,” Mikki said. “You need to be utterly obsessed. You need to devote your life to this craziness, and hopefully, you’re enjoying it,” he pointed out. “I love it, but I’m not obsessed with it. I still want to get my degree. And God damn it, I kind of want a boyfriend.”
She suddenly found herself having a hard time swallowing her curry, and it had nothing to do with the four-fire rating. “You could have a boyfriend and maintain a YouTube channel,” she said, almost tentatively. “At the same time, I mean.”
He studied her, then leaned forward, his eyes wide. “Do you have a boyfriend and a YouTube channel, by any chance?” he teased.
She shushed him, glancing around, but really, nobody gave a damn what they were talking about. “I don’t know,” she said in a low voice. “I think so? Maybe?”
He did a little butt-wiggling dance in his chair, then froze. “Wait. We’re talking about Tobin, right? Because I’m a huge shipper, too, and if I find out that was all fake and you’re dating someone else, I am going to be really disappointed.”
She suppressed the urge to shush him again. “Maybe,” she muttered instead. “I . . . think so? Or maybe not. Maybe it’s just sex.”
“YOU HAD SEX?”
Now she really shushed him. “For God’s sake!”
“I totally called this,” Mikki said, his grin ridiculously smug. “I knew you were into him! So you had sex, huh? Was it after that last video? Because oh my God, that thing was ridiculously hot. You two have more chemistry than a meth lab.”
“That is a strange analogy,” she said, rubbing her temples. “And . . . yes.” She paused. “And possibly a few more times that night.”
Mikki’s eyes went wide.
“And the following few days,” she said.
“You lucky bitch,” Mikki said. “I am envious, really. He’s a surprising hottie.”
“Oh, God,” Lily said, rubbing her hands over her face.
“So what’s the problem?” Mikki said, digging into his pad thai noodles with his chopsticks. “And please tell me you’re not self-sabotaging already. I know that you’re the type who loves snatching defeat from the jaws of romantic victory, but for God’s sake, you just slept with the guy. What’s wrong?”
“I do not self-sabotage,” she tried to protest, but Mikki’s lopsided grin and skeptical expression pinned her in place. “Well, not deliberately. And not that I was aware of?”
He scoffed, but nodded magnanimously. “I’ll allow it.” He still pinned her with that stare, though. “So, now that you’re aware of it, what are you doing about it?”
“I just . . . my work has been my life,” she said. “You might think I was self-sabotaging, but frankly, none of my relationships have ever been as important as the work, you know?”
“I know,” Mikki said. “That’s why you’re so good at what you do, and why your channel’s a success. But what’s different now?”
She frowned. “Tobin is different from anybody I’ve ever been involved with. He needs more attention, I think.”
“What, he’s needy?”
“No!” She quickly shook her head. “I don’t know. He spends lots of time with his friends, and he just does things spontaneously—doesn’t keep a regular filming schedule, mostly does things on a whim. He has lunch with his parents every month even though he doesn’t really seem to enjoy it. He loves being in Ponto Beach and hates LA. It’s not like he’s successful with his channel because he’s a machine or has this big strategy. I swear, it’s like he’s successful despite himself, you know?”
Mikki tilted his head to the side. “Still not seeing the problem.”
“The problem is, we’re very different!” she spluttered, pointing her chopsticks at Mikki. “I plan my content, I rehearse, I schedule stuff months in advance. I go to influencer parties every week. I’ve got big plans that involve me living here. If I don’t, I’ll fall behind. What if he doesn’t want to have something long distance? Or what if he thinks that I’m an obsessive-compulsive control freak?”
“Is he just meeting you?”
She glared at Mikki, who smiled apologetically.
“You’re looking at this very glass half-empty,” Mikki said. “Look at it this way: you two could be a total YouTube power couple. You’re already doing gangbusters with your cross collabs. I think he does something good for you, and I think you’re good for him. You say he’s disorganized and doesn’t want to go after opportunities? Help him grab them. Show him how to be consistent and successful. Hell, you could launch him into the stratosphere.”
She sighed, eating a prawn. “I suppose,” she said.
“At least talk to him about it,” he said. “Better talking to him than me, anyway.”
She wanted to change the subject, immediately. “You going to the party tonight?”
He smirked. “Which one?”
She smirked back. “Daisy’s birthday party.”
“You know she’s the one who dished behind your back to Dirt Tea.”
“I kind of suspected,” Lily said.
Mikki’s smile was sharp as a razor. “Ten bucks says that she acts like your best friend and suggests a collab when you’re there.”
“I had Chloe make me a special palette—all green,” Lily said, and Mikki burst out laughing. “I’m really, really looking forward to giving it to her.”
“You are amazing,” he said. “That’s why you’re going to be the biggest beauty influencer on the planet.”
She nodded. Still, she felt disquieted. Tobin wouldn’t care about this kind of stuff, she thought . . . not the way she did. And she wasn’t sure how he’d feel about everything else. But Mikki was right about one thing.
She’d just have to convince him. And when she wanted something, she figured out a plan, put in the work . . . and got it.