It’s Only Temporary by Iona Rose

Bianca

Itried very hard to be excited about our stay in the picture-perfect lodge as Connor wheeled our luggage in. All I could think about was what an idiot I am. I had harbored stupid fantasies that maybe Connor was one of those shy guys when it came to women and asking me to be his date for the wedding was his way of asking me out.

He had asked me to Colorado because his fiancée had dumped him at the last minute. No matter how many times I said it to myself, the pain did not cease. I felt used, which was even dafter because Connor had not promised me anything or even hinted that it was anything more than accompanying him home for a wedding.

I had to stop myself from glancing at the ring. It was a beautiful sapphire ring with two little diamonds on it. It was perfect and exactly the kind of engagement ring I’d always admired.

It even fit my finger and I couldn’t help but wonder if it had been his fiancée’s ring. Was that how he had picked me? By the size of my body. Maybe I was a copyright of his fiancée.

“Connor!” a woman who could only be his mother came rushing out at us.

“Mom!” Connor responded just as enthusiastically. He lowered our luggage to the floor and took his mother into his arms.

Despite my feelings, the ice in my heart melted a little at the obvious joy between mother and son as they hugged. She drew back and cupped his face.

“It’s so nice to have you home,” she said.

“It’s nice to be home Mom,” Connor said and then stepped back and draped an arm around me.

I reminded myself that I was his fake fiancée and plastered a smile on my face.

“Mom, this is Bianca, my fiancée. I told you about her on the phone.

Mrs. Kennedy stepped up to me and took my hands into hers. She smiled at me warmly, instantly disarming me with her friendliness.

“It’s such a pleasure to meet you. We’ve all been looking forward to this moment. I made everyone wait in the dining room. They’re having lunch. We don’t want to overwhelm you.”

She had a round pretty face, framed by a stylish bob. Her soft blond curls fell to the sides of her face and she kept tucking her hair behind her ears.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you too Mrs. Kennedy,” I said, hoping that I sounded like a smitten fiancée eager to meet her soon to be in-laws. I was grateful that I’d had the foresight to ask Connor for his surname.

“Please call me Judy,” she said as footsteps sounded on the dark wood floors and moments later, an older version of Connor emerged.

“Looks like I’m just in time for the introductions,” Connor’s dad said. He and Connor bear hugged and then he offered me his hand.

“Martin’s the name,” he said.

“Bianca and it’s a pleasure to meet you,” I said, my face wreathed in a genuine smile.

“Welcome to our home,” he said.

“Peter, would you please take Connor and Bianca’s luggage to the Blue room,” Judy said to a uniformed youngish man.

He and Connor exchanged greetings before he took our luggage and disappeared down a hallway to the right.

“We’re all in the dining room,” Judy said. “What a stroke of genius to bring Bianca with you. Then she can meet everyone in the family at the same time.”

Nausea rose up my throat as the magnitude of our deceit dawned on me. My heart pounded so hard, I could feel it in my ears. Suddenly, I felt angry at Connor for putting me in this situation.

The dining room was full of people seated at different tables, having their lunch. They all looked up as we entered the room. I fought the urge to turn and flee.

“Connor,” a pretty blond cried and shot up from her chair. She flew into Connor’s arms and he pulled her into a hug.

“That’s Sarah, my daughter and bride to be,” Judy whispered into my ear.

It was nice to see a family who were obviously close with one another.

“Bianca, this is my baby sister, her name’s Sarah. Sis, this is my beautiful fiancée.”

Sarah stepped up to me and to my surprise, she hugged and kissed me. “I’ve always wanted a sister and now it’s happening.”

Guilt bubbled up my throat and I tried to push it down. I would deal with my feelings later. First, I had to play my part. That was the agreement that Connor and I had made.

You couldn’t not like her or Connor’s entire family. They were lovely, cheerful people. Sarah took me to meet her fiancée, Brian who welcomed me just as warmly. Then Connor took me around the tables introducing me to everyone.

His grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins and friends. Judy had not been joking when she said that the whole family was there. We washed our hands and served ourselves lunch from a buffet style set up.

“Everything looks so good,” I said to Connor eyeing the food.

“You’re on vacation. Eat as much as you can,” he said, piling his plate high with food.

There were curious stares and Connor was teased a bit about finally getting someone to say yes, but after a while, everyone moved on to other topics of conversation.

I was glad to take a back seat and eat as I observed everyone. It was clear that the newlyweds were in love as they kept exchanging secret glances and touching each other.

They were lucky to have found each other but I felt no feelings of envy at all. It started out well enough with people loving each other and treating each other with kindness. Then the nastiness began.

I’d seen it so many times in my parents’ various relationships and marriages. Then when things got tough, they took off and moved on to other partners. I was not averse to affairs and long-term relationships, but marriage was a big no-no for me.

Obviously, it worked for some people. Connor’s parents seemed like they had found the secret to a long marriage. I on the other hand came from stock that wasn’t cut out for marriage and that was just fine with me. I was happy with my life and I knew that with time, I’d meet a man who felt as I did and we would have a nice long relationship.

Judy stood up and came to our table to speak to Connor. “Maybe you should show Bianca the room so that she can rest and relax after that journey.”

“Good idea,” Connor said. “Sorry B, I got carried away catching up with everyone, I forgot that you must be exhausted.” He stood up and offered me his hand which I took.

I ignored the sparks that flew from his hand to mine.

I stood up. “I was okay, really.”

We excused ourselves and left the dining room. We passed servers and other uniformed members of staff all who exchanged pleasantries with Connor.

The blue room turned out to be on the other side of the lodge. The hallway led outdoors to the garden, where we followed a paved path to the building on the other side.

“Do your parents live on the property full time?” I asked Connor.

“Yes, except when they take their yearly summer vacation,” he said. “It’s convenient for them to stay here.”

“It’s a perfect arrangement,” I said as Connor stopped in front of a door with a sign saying ‘Blue Room.’ “This is it.”

He pushed the door open and when I entered, my lips curved into an automatic smile. The room was beautiful, with a large four poster bed at the center and gorgeous rugs arranged on the dark wood floor.

The color scheme was blue but it wasn’t so much of it to jar the eyes. It was just perfect. White sheers covered the French doors that looked out into the garden.

“I love it,” I said to Connor as I walked to the French doors and slid them open. Outside was a small porch with two Adirondack chairs and a table and beyond that a couple of steps that led to the lawn and garden.

“It must be lovely in the summer,” I said.

“It’s lovely all year round to be honest,” Connor said.

A gust of icy cold wind blew in and I stepped back into the room and Connor slid the doors shut.

“You got some snow on your nose,” he said, laughingly stepping up to me.

He brushed it off and for a few seconds, I forgot everything else except how good he smelt. He went still and stared into my eyes. His gaze dropped to my lips and my insides melted. I was sure that he was going to kiss me. Would I kiss him back?

Before I could answer that question, Connor stepped back and disappointment flooded me.

“I’ll give you some privacy to shower,” he said.

“Okay,” I said, grateful to have some time to myself to think things through.

When Connor left, I kicked off my shoes and laid down on the bed on my back, looking up at the ceiling. Connor obviously knew what he was doing as pretending that I was his fiancée didn’t seem to bother him. As nice as these people were, they were his family and he was the one who knew them.

True, I’d been upset that he hadn’t mentioned the fiancée who had dumped him, but if I were to be truly honest, it didn’t change anything. The only difference was that I was now Connor’s fake fiancé instead of his fake girlfriend.

The only reason I’d been angry was because I hadn’t known that Connor had a fiancée and I’d lied to myself that he was attracted to me. It was not a nice feeling to know that I was replacing another woman.

A knock came on the door, startling me. I got up quickly and went to open it. It was Connor. He must have been outside because his lips looked pale with cold.

Instead of entering the room, he dipped his hands into his pockets and contemplated me.

“What’s up?” I said and then added in a teasing tone. “I hope my sister’s suspicions were not correct.”

He laughed and then grew serious. “I wanted to apologize again. I should have told you about Angie, that’s my ex. But I didn’t want to look like a loser. You’re so beautiful and I wanted to come across as cool, not like someone who had just been dumped.”

I threw my head back and laughed. “I understand and it really doesn’t make a difference. I was an idiot as well. I’d felt flattered that you asked me and I thought it was because you were attracted to me… or something stupid like that.”