The Recluse Heir by Monique Moreau
26
Things were tense. After the lapse in sanity that sent me scaling up the side of Cat’s home, I returned home to find Alex, Nicu, and Tatum sleeping on my couch and floor. Considering I had two spare bedrooms, I surmised by the empty bottles of liquor strewn across the living room that they had passed out where they’d been drinking at some point during the night, most likely waiting for me to return.
I wanted to howl in rage. It had nothing to do with my family and everything to do with Cat’s broken eyes last night when I wouldn’t tell her the reason that drove me to her. They haunted me with their remorse, which I was closer to forgiving than was healthy. She’d done everything in her power to comfort me, from sucking my cock to cuddling in my arms. It took herculean willpower to sneak out of her bedroom before the crack of dawn. At least her family was none the wiser.
Walking up to the men splayed out on my furniture, I smacked at their heads. One by one, they woke up, alternating between cursing and groaning as they clutched their heads. My mother had called Alex to tell him what had gone down. My brothers had a speech prepared, a bumbling declaration of love and fealty toward me as their true brother.
Uneasy with the emotions at play, I grumbled about how if they really loved me, they’d stop sobbing and get back to normal. To accelerate their exit from my living space, I shot off a text to Nina, Alex’s wife, to come over and pick him up. I bit my nails waiting for her arrival, and together, we got Alex onto his swaying feet and into the elevator.
One down, two to go. Unfortunately, it wasn’t quite as easy to get rid of the remaining pains in my ass.
Tatum and Nicu decided that it was best to stay and get hydrated while urging me to make something to eat. Since I was the only sober one, I cooked and nursed them back to health. They returned the favor by lounging around my apartment for the rest of the day, covertly monitoring me. They thought they were so smart, but their ruse was absurdly transparent.
They worried that I’d fall apart, but it was a relief to learn the truth from Mama. It explained why I was so different from my brothers, not only in my blond hair and pale eyes, but in my personality. Did my birth mother also prefer her own company?
By evening, I was long over their oppressive worrying and finally kicked them out.
I had to hand it to them, they were persistent in their determination to prove how much I meant to them. It had brought us closer, chipping away at the distance created by my father’s abuse and my continual silence. A code of silence I had no intention of breaking any further. Maybe one day, but for now, I was satisfied that we’d landed safely on the other side of the big revelation. As per Alex and my mother’s decision, we’d maintain the secret about my birth, even to Sebastian and Emma.
As for my mother, I visited her that evening, and we talked more about it. With her, I did break the code. Why? Because she was my mother, and she’d done right by me. Her love was unwavering. A true constant in my life, she deserved to know my truth after revealing hers. Plus, seeing this other side of her, I felt that she could handle it. Needless to say, there was a barrage of tears. I was a little surprised to see her indignation on my behalf, and I think it shook her worship of my father, something even discovering he had another family hadn’t succeeded in doing.
On the topic of forgiveness, Mama tried to get me to discuss Cat. If you can forgive me, then why not her? Everyone makes mistakes. You may make one. In fact, I’m fairly certain you’re making one now. She had a point, but I argued that her so-called “mistake” had been a form of protection. Misguided, but concern over my happiness was at the heart of her decision. The same could not be said of Cat.
No one was perfect, she countered. Cat was protecting her brother and should be given a second chance. I couldn’t admit how close I was to caving after last night. Cat had accepted my limits and comforted me without pressuring me to tell her what had happened. Her care had unmanned me, but fear kept me away. Complicated didn’t begin to describe my feelings. I was paralyzed by the struggle between my need for her and my fear of getting hurt again.
I should’ve been pleased, a few days later, when Nicu’s deference toward me crumbled, signaling that everything was back to normal. His tone had thankfully reverted to its usual tone, but our conversation wrecked what little oasis of peace I’d managed to carve out for myself in the gloomy depression I felt over Cat.
We were in my apartment, nursing a beer together over a soccer game, AC Milan playing against their archrivals, Inter Milan, in a quarter-final clash of the Coppa Italia.
It started with him chastising me over not marrying Cat. “Not sure what you expected, Luca. It was a fucked-up thing to do, taking her virginity. And I’m not saying that because I was her fiancé. I’m saying it ’cause it’s the truth.”
“You act like I forced her or something. Trust me,” I drawled. “It was entirely consensual.”
“I don’t doubt it, but she’s young and a woman.”
“So what? If she’s old enough to get married and lose her virginity to her husband, then she’s old enough to choose who she wants to give it up to. Cat has her own agency, regardless of her gender.”
“A blood bond is a blood bond. That supersedes a little snooping behind your back,” he refuted.
My jaw clenched so hard, swear to God, it was going to crack. “Fuck no, it doesn’t,” I snapped. I was being obstinate, but Nicu butting into my business made me argue with him.
“You’re talking like an idiot, like you don’t know the rules of our world.”
“She betrayed me.”
“So did Mama, but you forgave her. I don’t get you, I really don’t. You’re into her. Despite what some of the busybody mamas go around saying, this wasn’t about hurting me. We both know I don’t give a shit. You sure as hell didn’t hit that for your ego. So that leaves one reason. You care for her. Are you really going to let another man touch what’s yours? Especially him?”
My spine snapped straight up. “What other man? Who the hell is him?”
“Slimy Simu,” Nicu replied with the pithy nickname he’d given the Popescu consilier.
“What?” The blood drained from my face. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“You didn’t hear?” he replied with a sly smirk. “Simu asked for her hand. He doesn’t care that she’s not a virgin. Apparently, he doesn’t care that she’s still in love with you, either. My spies told me that he refused to help her brother if she didn’t marry him. Get this, his uncle is the Hagi consilier. Simu’s influence is their last hope, so she has no choice but to accept him. She’s his now.”
“She’s not,” I denied.
Pity was written over my little brother’s face as he shook his head. “Believe me, it’s true. The point is, are you going to allow another man, the enemy, to clean up your mess? It’s not a good look for you, brother.”
I stood up, towering over him. My head was about to explode. Explode. “What in the fuck are you talking about?”
Casually draping his arm over the top of the couch, he raised a brow at me. “What, the part about other people cleaning up your mess? First, you refused to marry her, so I picked up the slack. Then, you fucking bond with her and refuse to marry her, leaving Slimy Simu to take the damaged goods off her father’s hands.”
“Don’t. Fucking. Call her that,” I spat out. God, I hated how obsessed our society was with women and sexual purity, like they were only as good as their hymen. Such fucking bullshit.
He rolled his eyes. “Okay, whatever.”
“I’m not a fucking puppet that you can pull by the strings. I didn’t marry her the first time around because I’m not Alex’s little fuck toy, unlike you.”
His eyes narrowed. “And what’s your excuse for not marrying her now? Don’t try to use the excuse that she rifled through your shit because that’s nowhere near a good enough reason to turn your back on a blood bond.”
That pulled me up short. My eyes shot away from his incisive glare. I swallowed and said, “I can’t marry her.”
He leaned forward, muscles coiled to pounce. “Why the fuck not?”
“There are too many reasons,” I grumbled.
I fucking ached for her. I was close to forgiving her, vacillating back and forth, back and forth. Hell, I hadn’t made it through one night without sneaking over to her house, arguing with myself as I paced beneath her bedroom window, only to creep away hours later. It was a miracle that I hadn’t already ended up in her bed, but I doubted I’d win the battle tonight.
I couldn’t admit to Nicu that I was fucking shaking in my boots from fear. I’d given my heart to her, and she’d hurt me. She’d made a bad mistake, and I believed she learned from it. Problem was, Cat left me exposed. Loving her had made me vulnerable to getting hurt again. After my father, I made an oath to myself that I’d never put myself in a position to get hurt again.
“Well, humor me. Since there are so many, why not name a few.”
I shook my head.
“Alright, let me come up with a few. You don’t want to marry. You don’t want to marry a mafie girl. You don’t respect our rules, even though you know the blood bond is as close to a sacrament as they come. You don’t want to make your family happy. You don’t want to make yourself happy. She snooped around on you because she’s young and stupid and easily manipulated by her sick fuck of a father and brother. But the real reason has little to do with any of that, does it? No, it goes much deeper. Something like you don’t feel worthy of love. Of happiness. Am I getting warm?”
Pow!And there it went. My head exploded. Fuck, since when was my little brother so fucking perceptive? I had dug in my heels, weaponizing my stubbornness and my fury at Alex to help me stay away. But the fever had broken with Simu back on the scene. That fucker was dangerous. Not only was there no doubt that she still loved me, but his motivations for wanting to marry her were highly suspect.
Yes, she could theoretically hurt me again, but instead of focusing on the potential damage, what if I focused on how she shielded me the other night? The remorse I read in her journal was real, and Cat was too intelligent to make the same mistake twice. The core issue was that I didn’t think I deserved love. It came back to my father. Knowing he was the source of that fear empowered me to fight it. I wouldn’t let my daddy-dearest fear win. Cat was in danger, and I wasn’t letting her go. I could resolve the Cristo problem. Cat might not know this, but Simu wasn’t the only one with clout with the Hagi clan.
My head whipped around, my glare boring into my brother. He gave me a nonchalant shrug as he persisted, “After what you pulled, I don’t think you’re wrong. You sure as hell don’t deserve her, even if she’s a Popescu. Hell, if I found a girl I wanted and I’d popped her cherry, especially if she was mafie, I’d run her to the ground and lock her down. I swear, I don’t understand you.”
“And you never will,” I thundered. “Now get the fuck out of my apartment.”
He gave a light shrug. Bracing his hands on the couch, he placed his beer bottle on the coffee table, got to his feet, and sauntered to the front door, leaving it open as he left. He knew that annoyed the shit out of me, but he did it anyway, the little punk.
Stalking to the entrance, I slammed the door hard, letting it shudder in its frame. A wave of guilt gripped me by the throat so tightly I struggled to breathe. I pushed her to this by throwing her out and leaving her to take care of the Cristo situation alone. By not taking care of her, I allowed Simu this entry point back into her life. And now he had power over her.
If Simu touched a hair on Cat’s head, I’d take a knife to his throat. Has he already touched her? Just the thought made me want to track him down and kick him to death. He didn’t deserve to breathe next to her, much less touch her or fuck her or, God forbid, marry her. My hands curled into fists at my side.
The image of him lying beside her in bed, lying on top of her—fuck! I couldn’t go there. If I did, I’d go hunting. Murderous intent pounded through my bloodstream, but I reined it back. Killing Simu would definitely make me feel better, but it wouldn’t solve the root of my problem. Getting Cat back would.
And with that, I knew what to do.
She was mine and I was going after her.
