It Started with a Crack by Piper James

Me: Looks like your ax-murdering plans are going to have to wait. I have to go into the office.

Noah: Bummer. And the ax was metaphorical. I just meant I was going to split you in half.

Noah: With my cock, in case that wasn’t clear.

Me: Oh, my God.

Noah: Yep. That would’ve been screamed. A lot.

Me: You’re ridiculous.

Me: But also, sharpen that ax. I’ll be home as soon as I can.

Noah: I’ll be waiting. *ax emoji* *water spray emoji* *heart-eyes emoji*