An Earl’s Broken Heart by Ella Edon

Chapter Three

"Only broken people need saving, Elizabeth," Isabel said, taking a seat by her sister in front of the pianoforte.

Since the day she had that nightmare regarding her past, Isabel had been trying to keep her mind busy. It was perhaps because she had been in that manor alone for a very long time that her mind kept drifting to the past and haunting her in her dreams. Visiting her sister Elizabeth seemed like the only solution to her problem and so she took it.

"Do not say that, Isabel. You do know I never meant it that way. All I am saying is that it has been ten months since his passing. You ought to be wed again by now." Elizabeth said, frowning.

Isabel understood what Elizabeth was trying to do. She had seen Isabel lose an emotionally abusive husband and was desperate to see her sister begin to heal. That was the beauty of her sister. She was someone who always found joy in the happiness of others. Their sisterhood had a beautiful balance; where Isabel was always in search of novelty and adventure, Elizabeth found solace in a safe, steady hand. That had played out in their love lives too. Elizabeth’s husband Lord Blackthorne was as safe and steady a man as one could possibly imagine. He was never late, rose at the same time every morning, and climbed a flight of stairs one stair at a time. Isabel’s life had not been half so steady.

Isabel took in a deep breath and played out a gentle melody on the pianoforte. Her sister straightened and raised an eyebrow as she slowly became familiar with the tune. It was one they had played often in their youth. A short Bagatelle in C major, it was gentle, with flowing arpeggios that linked the left and right hands. Before long, her sister was singing along. She had a pleasant voice, very soft and sweet. Together, they made the song fill the music room for a marvelous moment before the piece was done.

Isabel turned to face her sister. “I will much prefer to be alone than to be trapped in a loveless marriage again,” she said.

For that, Elizabeth had no answer.

Many a time, Elizabeth had wanted to confront Lord Maxwell on his ugly treatment towards Isabel, but Isabel had often stopped her. Elizabeth was more than a sister to Isabel; she was her best friend and mother. Having lost their mother at a very young age, Isabel barely recalled anything about the Countess, as Elizabeth quickly filled the motherly void in her life. It had been Elizabeth who had also confronted their father for forcing such a marriage upon Isabel.

Perhaps it was because of her kind heart that she had been so lucky in life, Isabel often thought. She wedded a noble man who was rich and who gained their father's approval. Not just that, he loved Elizabeth unconditionally and even more so after she bore their son. Isabel had always been happy for her sister; she, however, could not help but wish that her life had turned out the same way. A husband who loved and cherished her, whom she would bear children for.

With Isabel’s late husband, she had never conceived. Although she had always wondered why, a part of her had never wanted to bear a child in such a loveless marriage. But sometimes, she wished she had been able to. Perhaps it might have reduced the terrible way Lord Maxwell had treated her.

"I know you mean well..." Isabel sighed. "You of all people know that I have no luck in matrimony..."

"People will start talking and they will think you are incapable to keep the manor yourself."

Isabel shifted uncomfortably. She knew that her sister was right, but she did not want to imagine being wed again. She had been unfortunate before. She wanted to enjoy being alone, basking in the peace that was created by her loneliness. She wanted no one now, all she wanted was to go day by day without having anyone to order her around.

Needing to calm herself, Isabel laid a finger on one of the keys on the pianoforte and when the tone filled the room, she smiled soothingly. The pianoforte had been the only thing that had kept her together in that manor, kept her from losing her mind entirely.

"I'm sorry if it seems that I am pushing you too much, I just want you to not feel so alone."

Isabel shook her head. "Elizabeth. Please, stop."

Elizabeth sighed. "I shan't speak of the matter anymore. Come; let us proceed to the courtyard. I have much I wish to tell you."

As Elizabeth rose, Isabel sat there and gave her a warning gaze. "What do you wish to discuss that cannot be done here?"

"Do you not wish to hear about what has been happening in the neighborhood?" Elizabeth asked with a small smile.

Isabel was not surprised that her sister would say that. Elizabeth yearned for information every passing minute. Isabel called it gossip, but Elizabeth often countered that. She would often say that knowledge was key and knowing what happened in people's lives would let you know how to act around them, speak to them, and even look at them.

"The courtyard has no walls and walls do have ears, so come." Elizabeth gestured.

"Perhaps I made a mistake by calling on you, Sister. I should have come to visit my nephew instead. " Isabel said, her crooked smile exposing the jest in her words.

Elizabeth smiled and made her way out of the music room. Just as Isabel was rising, she heard Elizabeth speaking outside. "Have some tea and biscuits brought to the courtyard for the Dowager Viscountess and I."

Once they arrived at the courtyard and took their seats, Elizabeth delved into the information she had gathered.

"It appears that Lord Wilson has gone bankrupt. His father was sunk in great debt right before his death and Lord Wilson was unable to uphold the estate for long afterwards. There was nothing that could have been done," said Elizabeth in somewhat of a whisper.

Isabel felt pity for Lord Wilson on hearing that. "This is terrible news, Sister. "

Elizabeth concurred. "It is indeed so. But there is more."

"However do you even get this information?"

"I shall not tell you my sources, Isabel. All you need do is listen."

"I shall make sure to call on Humphrey, should I come calling at this manor again." Isabel said, feigning to look around for her nephew while Elizabeth chuckled.

"Humphrey shall be busy with his governess. You shan't be allowed to see him." Elizabeth smirked. Isabel saw the twinkle in her eyes when she spoke about her son. A feeling washed over her, but it passed just as soon. A smile came over her when she thought about him as well.

"Well, I shall see him on my next visit. "Said Isabel, grinning.

"I have not seen you this excited in a while. Is the news of Alexander's return to London as the Earl of Carter the reason?" Elizabeth asked, grinning.

Isabel froze. As soon as Elizabeth had said it, it was as though all the wind had been knocked completely from her. She went still, trying to remaster herself. Elizabeth stopped talking, her eyes widening a tad. Alexander was in London? Isabel asked within herself, as she was too shocked to speak. She sat still, her hands gripping the sides and her lips slightly parted. The name rang in her ears several times and all she could think of was how foreign it felt when her sister had uttered the name. It seemed like the name of a stranger, not someone she had known, someone she had loved. No one had uttered the name near her for the past seven years. Isabel did not know how to react to such news. It was a lot to take in. Thankfully, at that moment, the ladies were interrupted as a maid walked towards them with a tray of tea and biscuits.

"Isabel, I…" Elizabeth went quiet as the maid set their teacups properly. Once she was done, Elizabeth began to speak. "I apologize, I have been carried away."

Isabel wanted no apology from her sister. All she wanted was for her to go on, so she could hear the rest of what she had to say. "No..." she said with much effort. "Do tell, what have you heard?”

Elizabeth shook her head. "No. No. I shan't.”

"I wish to know, Elizabeth." Isabel said sternly. "Please."

Elizabeth sighed. "Rumor has it that he has arrived in London and now occupies the Carter Manor. He is the closest family member to Lord John Steward, who was the Earl of Carter. He is unwed and many young ladies shall be vying for his attention, after all, the season has only begun and... Isabel...?"

Isabel had drifted again. Her thoughts overpowered her this time. Alexander is the Earl of Carter? And after seven years, he is now back in London?

She questioned herself yet she knew she had no answer. She tried to imagine what he looked like now, if his boyish grin remained, if he had grown more of a beard or if he liked to keep it shaven clean. She wondered how he had been all those years ago. Her heart thudded; her knees felt weak.

Knowing that he was somewhere away from London always had her curious to know how he was doing, but nothing quite nagging. However, knowing now that he was in the same place as she was, she felt jitters run through her. What would happen if their paths were to cross? How would he address her? And how would she address him?

"This is a lot to take in," she finally blurted out.

Elizabeth sat up. "Isabel, you must be calm. His return has nothing to do with you."

"That is not the point, Elizabeth. He has returned. How do I face him? What might he think of me?"

"It has been so long a time... You must let yourself free from the burdens of guilt."

Isabel shook her head. That was impossible, given the circumstances. Her mind was filled with thoughts that she could not subdue. She needed to get out of there. She needed to have some time to herself, to prep herself for the possibility of seeing Alexander again after seven years.

"I must leave." She rose.

Elizabeth rose as well. "When you have this look, it is apparent you want no further discussions."

Isabel had no words to respond to her, so all she did was walked around the table and kiss her sister on her cheek. "Have a lovely day, Elizabeth. Send my love to little Humphrey."

With those words, she made her way out of the manor. The coachman brought her carriage around not long after she emerged from the large double French doors and took her home.

* * *

For many years, Isabel had thought that she had created a safe space for herself. She had thought that with Alexander away, she could avoid ever seeing him. But fate had changed it all. Fate had presented her with a situation that was inevitable. Worse was that Alexander was now nobility.

"Welcome back, my Lady.” The butler, Mr. Adley, said to her as she walked in. Isabel was however in a hurry to be alone. She did not want to speak to anyone. She wanted to be in her bedchamber all alone.

"Do you need anything, my Lady?"

Isabel waved him off and made her way up the stairs. Once in her bedchamber, she shut the door behind her. She walked over to her bed, plopped down on it, and for the first time in many months, Isabel did what she knew how to do best: she cried. Her eyes brimmed and the tears cascaded down her cheeks. Her hands shook and her sobs were muffled by the sheets. They had been her closest comfort in the years past. They had heard her cries, quieted them, and absorbed her tears.

There was no other way that Isabel knew to show her pain than this.

Why was her past coming back to her? Why could she never truly be happy? Was fate also against her? Did fate think that she had not suffered enough for what happened? Was she perhaps born to be unfortunate?

Isabel sighed and breathed out a few times. She blamed her father for the way everything had turned out. She had never truly forgiven him for ruining her life the way he did. If only he had let her wed Alexander, she would not have lived so miserably. He brought this upon her, all because he wanted affluence and nobility, because he cared more about the ton than her. But what was all of this when there was no happiness? It was absolutely nothing.

A conclusion formed in her head right in the middle of her anger. In order to be at peace with herself, all she needed to do was apologize to Alexander whenever she encountered him. Elizabeth was right, she needed to free herself. And knowing Alexander, with her knowledge from the past, he was quite kind and rarely bore anything to heart. Asking for his forgiveness would be easy. After that would be done, she could move on and finally live in peace.