Sacrificing his Highland Heart by Kenna Kendrick
Chapter Nine
“He’s seen me. God in Heaven!” Rose pulled away from her position at the window and slammed down into the seat at her desk. “What in God’s name was I doing? Just staring at the man! And he was….”
She couldn’t even utter the word aloud. Naked, the man was naked, and when she’d spotted him, her eyes refused to leave his form. Humiliated, Rose’s hand moved to her mouth, shocked at her wantonness. What would Mrs. Drummond think of her? Or better yet, her father or Henry? But it had been such a surprise. It wasn’t as if she’d ever expected such a thing to happen or that it had ever happened to her before. She’d never seen a man in such a state, besides in paintings, in books, and the like.
She wasn’t even sure how it had happened. She’d stood after having finished her letter to Henry and went to look out the window and enjoy the fresh breeze. She’d closed her eyes for a little while but opened them at the sound of hooves, and she’d seen none other than Laird Rede jump down from his horse and, after a few seconds, begin to remove his clothing.
She had to blink at the image when she’d first seen his strong, muscled body completely bare of clothing. He paused for a few seconds before rushing into the water, giving her time to look her fill. Then when he was finished swimming, she watched as he walked back up on the beach. Even though she’d never seen a man’s naked body before, something deep inside of her awoke at the sight of it. His body was so strong, so dominating, so enticing in a way that she couldn’t yet understand fully. There was something dangerous about it that was all too alluring.
She remembered then what Susan had told her just before Euan had entered the library to find them laughing. “Well, Lady Rede, perhaps it is nae seemly for me tae say so, but there is a whole village of women and even those in the castle who are jealous of yer conquest.”
“My conquest?”
“Laird Rede.” Susan had leaned in closer to whisper. “Many say that he is an excellent lover. There are plenty of well-born Scottish women in the village who had hoped he might look tae them for marriage.”
Rose had been so in shock by her young servant’s words that she couldn’t say anything for several seconds. And she was sickened by the fact that she was almost jealous that other women had shared her husband. Why should she care? But she could believe those women. His kiss was expert enough, and even more than a kiss would be…she had trembled to think of it.
Then Susan saw her horrified face and said, “Forgive me, my lady, I should nae have said anything. Och, I am forever making mistakes, and on my first day, nae less!” That was when Rose had laughed, and Euan had entered the room all tall and menacing and handsome.
Now she had seen him unclothed, and images of him as a lover sent goosebumps over her skin. As she sat at her desk, new thoughts were racing through her mind. He had seen her, and now he might come and confront her about it. What would he think? That she was interested in seeing more of his naked body? Or would he come to berate her or even punish her?
A thick pool of dread gathered in her stomach. He was reputed to be a brute after all. While he had let her father go, he had “imprisoned” her through marriage. There was no telling now what he might do to her since she was without her family and forced to live in a new place among strangers. She clasped onto the cup of wine that Susan had brought her and put it to her lips. She was trembling all over, and she hoped the wine would help her from becoming undone.
Not only could her husband come and find her in her study, but he might see the open letter to Henry that she’d written, describing the castle and its architecture with as much detail as she could.
What would he think of that?
Trying not to spill the wine, she quickly put the cup down and hastily folded the letter, and sealed it shut. She would have to get the letter out of the castle before he had even realized she’d sent a letter. And she would also have to swear Susan to secrecy. Perhaps she had been too foolish to write? Oh, she wasn’t sure, and she battled with herself when she heard a knock at the door. She gasped, nearly dropping the letter and falling out of her seat at the same time.
“Come in!” she called in a wavering voice and shoved the letter into one of the ornately carved drawers. She stood up and smoothed her skirts, begging God that it was not her husband come to chastise her on the other side of the door.
God must not have been listening. Euan stood there, his gaze scrutinizing, but his features still somehow soft as he opened the door. He looked around the room, and his look was distant. Her heart was beating so rapidly she feared that its pounding would fill the silence between them. For a few seconds, he didn’t seem to notice she was there until his gaze lit upon her. “Lady Rede,” he said, clearing his throat and shaking off whatever emotion had been in his face. His blue eyes turned to ice once more.
She braced herself to be chastised. The new lady of a Scottish clan should not hang out of the window gawking at a naked man, even if said naked man was her husband.
“I see that Susan has brought ye tae yer parlor. Is it tae yer liking?”
Rose frowned. He wasn’t here to speak of her misconduct. He was asking her once again if something was to her liking? “Yes, Laird.” She wondered when they could dispense with the titles and call one another by their names. Not that she would want their intimacy to go beyond that. Her body betrayed her by feeling the slightest warmth and tingle at his presence. Even though he was fully clothed again, her eyes remembered what she’d seen on the beach. Hard muscle covering every inch of him. His blond hair, ordinarily windswept, was now wet and had been mussed by his hand. His beard shone a little with dampness. She swallowed, trying her best to get her physical sensations under control. She needed to be cold and focused to survive as his lady.
“You are very kind to be so attentive. But you have already asked if everything was to my liking today. I doubt it would have changed so quickly.” There was the slightest bit of rancor in her voice, and Euan noticed. His mouth set into a grim line.
“Och well, I had hoped tae make sure ye were settled so that we could continue on with our lives without bothering one another too much. After we have spoken, then I can leave ye tae yer peace.” His words both thrilled and disappointed her. “This was my mother’s room. Treat it with care, Sassenach.” He practically spat the words now, and Rose’s new sensations were that of anger.
She was so grateful for the feeling, she nearly sank to the floor with relief. Anger was much more comfortable to deal with than lust.
* * *
As soon as Euan was dressed again, he rushed inside the castle and hurried to the study where he knew she was. What did he plan to say to her? Stop looking at me when I am unclothed? Do not hang out of windows in the castle? The ideas that came to him became more and more foolish, but his legs were taking them to her without stopping.
Part of his desire to see her was also to see what the servants had done with the study. His father had kept it closed ever since his mother died, and Euan had respected his wishes. Even after his father’s death, he had kept it closed and untouched, but now that he had a wife coming, he’d asked the servants to clean the room and prepare it for a new mistress.
He was now eager to see the room and see if it would fill him with all the sensations he felt when thinking about his mother. While the library was her absolute favorite room, the study was her special hiding place away from the rest of the house. Growing up, he had always thought she was up to some mysterious business there. Now he knew that she had merely conducted her affairs or spent time in private.
His limbs were trembling when he finally knocked and was allowed entry. Slowly, he pushed open the door, and he almost gasped at the sight of the study, clean and sparkling with a fresh fire in the hearth. He was in a daze for a few moments as he took it all in.
It is just as I remember.
He wasn’t sure if that comforted or unsettled him. He didn’t like to think of his parents too much, for their deaths brought back all the horrible memories of them and reminded him that he was utterly alone in the world. After a few more seconds, he could focus on the matter at hand, and he turned his attention toward Rose. The Sassenach. His new wife. The woman who’d been nearly falling out of the window looking his way on the beach when he’d been completely naked.
At the sight of her lovely green eyes and lifted, defiant chin, he wavered. He realized that he didn’t know what to say to her. She looked almost nervous about his following words, but his mind went completely blank. He said the first thing that came to his mind, but it was received with sarcasm.
“I shall do my utmost to care for the room. I would never dream of doing otherwise, despite you thinking of me as some sort of barbarian.” Her eyes flashed a warning at him, and he bristled. She really was so bold. He had thought an Englishwoman being brought from her own country forced to marry a Scotsman against her will would be terrified. Instead, she seemed to fight back at him every time they spoke.
“Good. See that ye do,” he replied nastily. “And now that it has been established that everything is tae yer liking, there is nae need for us tae speak any longer. Ye may enjoy yer new life as Lady Rede. We will see each other only in passing.”
She gave him a solemn nod, but that was all. That same feeling of disappointment rankled him that his new wife wanted nothing to do with him. He did the same and turned on his heel to leave. With his back still turned toward her, his hand on the door, he looked back just a little.
“Ye are free tae use the stables and the horses at yer leisure. And of course, the land is yers tae enjoy, as is the beach.” A wicked thought came to his mind, and he had to keep from grinning too wide. “Seeing as how much ye enjoyed yer beach view just a few minutes ago, I thought perhaps tae let ye ken that ye may use the beach whenever ye like.” He grinned at the quiet gasp he heard from her direction, and then he left, slamming the door after him.
“That will teach the lass,” he said, gratified that he had elicited a shocked reaction from her.
She must assuredly be innocent, for her to react tae my words like that.
He liked that he had confirmation of her innocence for more reasons than one, but there was only one reason that he really wanted to explore. He could now have a little fun teasing her about her blatant staring at him and make her as uncomfortable as possible. It was the least he could do in vengeance against his English wife, who refused to be meek and keep from irritating him to no end. Nine years of war against the English, and despite its silliness, he was satisfied to get his vengeance in some small way.
He was relieved he had made her aware that they need not speak to each other very often. In the room with her, he could feel his desire growing again, even without alcohol to muddle his brain. He would need to keep a hold on that to keep his vow and not bed her.
Amid all the emotions and ideas floating around his head, one thing bothered him the most. When he had seen the study made beautiful by the servants’ hands, with Rose standing inside, he had thought, for the merest fraction of a second, that she looked completely at home.
