Crash & Carnage by Emma Slate
Chapter 23
He took me to a café.The hostess showed us to a booth, and instead of sitting across from me, Boxer slid into the seat next to me. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and tucked me into his side.
“This is going to make it hard to eat,” I said.
“I’ll feed you.”
“Yeah, no,” I said with a laugh.
Boxer grinned and winked at the waitress who handed us our menus. She blushed and mumbled, “Something to drink?”
“Linden?” Boxer prodded.
“Coffee, please.”
“Same. Thanks, darlin’.”
The young woman flushed even redder and scampered away.
“You’re cruel,” I said. “You embarrassed that poor girl.”
“Didn’t mean to.” He leaned close to my ear. “You know the real reason I wanted to sit this close to you?”
While he was talking, his free hand that wasn’t draped around my shoulder wandered across my thigh toward the seam of my legs. When he grazed the fly of my jeans, it caused me to jump and bump my knee underneath the tabletop.
It rattled the creamer and salt and pepper shakers, and the noise caused heads to turn in our direction.
“Boxer,” I hissed.
His grin was cheeky and full of trouble.
I was glaring at him when the waitress returned to the table with our coffees. I hadn’t looked at the menu yet, but Boxer ordered while I scanned it.
A few minutes later, we were alone again.
“You can touch me, you know,” he said. “I won’t object.”
“I didn’t touch you enough this morning? Or last night? Or in the shower?”
He looked deep into my eyes and said, “It’ll never be enough.”
I sighed and then snuggled deeper into his embrace.
“Don’t you guys look cozy,” Zip said suddenly.
I jumped again, hitting my other knee. “Son of a…” I muttered, rubbing my stinging kneecap.
Joni elbowed Zip in the ribs, causing him to grunt. “Sorry,” he apologized.
“It’s okay. You guys want to join us?” I asked.
“We don’t want to intrude,” Joni said.
“Intrude, please.” I grinned. “And maybe your presence will help keep Boxer in line.”
“Yeah, right,” Zip said. “I’ve never known anyone to keep him in line. I was hoping you’d be the woman for the job.”
Something inside of me settled at his words. He was accepting me in his own way. I was humbled. And comfortable. Like just maybe, for the first time in my life I’d found people I could let my guard down around.
Joni and Zip took the seat across from us. Zip angled his body close to Joni and absently brushed a kiss to her hair.
I grinned to myself. I loved that the Blue Angels were not afraid to show affection to their women.
The waitress returned with our food and set our plates down in front of us.
She smiled at Joni and Zip. “Hey, guys. Do you want your usual?”
“Nah, I want to change it up,” Joni said. “Grilled cheese and tomato soup, please.”
“Zip?” the waitress asked.
“Usual for me, Suzie. Thanks.”
“Right-o.”
When she left, I looked at Joni. “You guys are regulars here?”
She nodded. “It’s close to the garage.”
“Garage? What garage?” I asked.
“Charlie’s,” Boxer said. “Where we work.”
“Ah,” I said. “Got it.”
“I meet Zip here a few times a week. They’ve gotten to know us.” Joni looked at Zip and beamed, her cheeks rosy. “I’m afraid we’ve gotten too predictable and comfortable in our routine.”
“No shit,” Zip muttered. “Every time I come home, the TV’s on, and the woman is watching all that HGTV crap. It’s like we’ve become sixty-five overnight.”
“You were the one that wanted to renovate an old house,” Joni reminded him. “So don’t blame me for watching those shows so I have an idea of what the hell we’ve gotten ourselves into.”
“You’re renovating a house?” I asked. “That’s really cool. I wish I had the time to do something like that.”
“You’re still coming over tonight, right?” Joni asked. “You don’t have to work?”
“I’m free.” I looked at Boxer. “My schedule the last few weeks has been wonky, but I’m using it to my advantage.”
“Speaking of advantage…will you let me take advantage of you tonight when you crash at my place again?”
I stared into his eyes and grinned. “You can take advantage of me if you let me take advantage of you.”
“I’m so here for that.”
“I think they’ve forgotten about us,” Joni said to Zip.
“Yup,” Zip agreed. “They’re practically shacking up. And another Blue Angel bites the dust.”
“Dude, I can hear you,” Boxer said.
Zip grinned. “How much shit did you give me over Joni?”
“Plenty.”
“Turnabout is fair play, from where I’m sitting.”
“So go sit at another table,” Boxer said lightly. “And let me grope my woman in peace.”
“Do I have any say in the matter on this groping in public?” I asked with an arch of my brow.
He winked. “You’ll like it, trust me.”
“Gag,” Joni joked.
The server returned and plopped Joni and Zip’s food down in front of them. Joni reached for the pepper shaker.
“Eat fast,” she stage-whispered to Zip. “Then we can get out of here and let the love birds get back to their inappropriate groping.”
She looked at me and shot me a wink and a grin.
I smiled back.
After the check was paid, Zip and Boxer went outside to discuss club business while Joni and I finished up our drinks. Joni glanced out the window, her brow wrinkling with displeasure.
“What’s that look for?” I asked her.
“Zip’s smoking again. He quit for a while and was doing really well, but he’s clearly stressed about something. It used to be me he needed a cigarette over.” She grinned at me. “I drove him crazy while we were getting together.”
I chuckled. “Of course you drove him crazy. Look at you. You’re gorgeous.”
“You’re a doll.” She brushed aside my compliment. “Has Boxer said anything to you?”
“About?”
“I don’t know. Zip’s been…on edge, I guess. For a couple of weeks now.”
I tapped my fingers on the rim of my coffee mug, unsure of how to answer. It was clear to me that she didn’t know that Boxer had been shot. He wore long sleeves, and his bandage was concealed. Boxer hadn’t come out and said I wasn’t allowed to say anything to the Old Ladies, but it didn’t need to be addressed. They did not involve their women in club business, even if I was something of a novelty.
“Do you think it has to do with club business?” I asked evasively.
“Probably.” She sighed.
“Do you wish you knew what went on? Boxer told me the club doesn’t tell the Old Ladies what’s what. Does that bother you?”
“Honestly? No. I think if I knew, I’d worry more. As it stands, I can somehow compartmentalize it. Almost pretend that Zip doesn’t carry a pistol. And I can pretend I don’t know that he’s had to use it before…”
I swallowed.
She peered at me. “You know, this is not really the place for this discussion.”
I instantly retreated, feeling foolish for asking.
She reached across the table and patted my hand. “I didn’t mean that to sound the way it did—like I wouldn’t talk about it. I’ll talk about it, but maybe we talk about it tonight? When we’re at my house?”
The knot of rejection uncurled inside of me. “That’s a good idea.”
Boxer and Zip came back inside and hovered by the table. Joni wrinkled her nose when Zip leaned down to press a kiss to her lips.
“You stink.”
“Woman, don’t start with me,” Zip muttered.
“I’m a nurse,” she said. “And Linden’s a doctor. Do I really need to lecture you about smoking and your health?”
“Don’t drag me into this,” I said, hastily grabbing my purse. “This is between the two of you.”
“Yeah, let’s get out of here.” Boxer reached for my hand. “Good luck, Zip.”
We left the café and stepped out into the late autumn sunshine. Boxer removed his aviators from his leather cut pocket and put them on.
“I’ve got to stop by the garage.”
“Fine.”
He sighed. “You’ve got a tone. What’s the tone for?”
“She’s worried about him,” I said to Boxer as we headed toward his truck.
“He’s not a hard-core smoker. He’ll go months without a cigarette.” He opened the passenger door for me, and I climbed up into the seat.
“That’s not her issue,” I said. “She said he only smokes when he’s stressed.”
He shut the door and went over to the driver’s side and got in. “What do you want me to do, Linden? Zip’s a grown man who can make his own decisions.”
He jammed the key into the ignition.
“Yes, I’m aware. We can all make our own decisions,” I told him. “She knows something’s going on that has nothing to do with her or their relationship.”
“He can’t tell her about club business,” he insisted.
“Maybe he should,” I fired back. “I know about it. Why am I allowed to know about it, but she can’t? Why can’t the other Old Ladies know about it?”
“You know because you were the one to patch me up. And we’ve been clear that might happen again. No surprises with you.”
“So, if I hadn’t been a doctor, Zip would never have come to me.”
“He wouldn’t have had any reason to.”
“So, I never would’ve known how you got injured, only that you were injured?”
I looked out the window.
“You don’t get to be mad at me,” he said.
“What am I mad at you about?” I demanded.
“I dunno. I’m just covering my bases.”
“You’re impossible.”
“Impossible to stay mad at.” He winked.
“I still think you should tell the Old Ladies what’s what,” I said.
“No.”
I sighed. “I’m between a rock and a hard place. I know you’ve been shot. They don’t know you’ve been shot. I’m hanging out with the Old Ladies tonight. Do you really expect me not to say anything to them about this?”
“Patient confidentiality, Doc. That’s a thing. I thought you’d be used to it by now.”
I stared straight ahead and fell silent.
“What, Doc? What’s going through that big ol’ brain of yours?”
I smiled absently at his teasing tone, but it quickly died. “I’m neither an Old Lady nor a Blue Angel. I’m just the doctor that got caught in the middle. Joni’s offering me her friendship, Boxer. She’s including me. It feels like I’m lying to them.” I sighed. “Are you sure you’re protecting them by keeping them in the dark?”
“Yes, Linden.” He sighed, sounding tired. “Not only is it the way it’s always been, it’s critical that you understand it has to be this way. See what you’re feeling right now? That pull to talk to them, tell them what’s going on? Do you have any idea the risk we took telling you about any of this? It’s insane, frankly, and I had to convince the club you were different. Doctor-patient confidentiality is the only reason they finally got on board with it. Imagine all the women in the club all talking about this shit, their minds going wild and calling family members and—oh fuck all that. It just can’t happen.”
“I get it, but how can Joni be there for Zip the way he needs if he won’t confide in her?” I asked.
He pulled into Charlie’s Motorcycle Repair Shop and parked.
“Linden, stop. Let me lay it out for you, okay? We love our women and children, and we protect them the best way we know how. If Joni or Mia or any of the other Old Ladies has problems with how we do shit, they shouldn’t have stayed. They shouldn’t have chosen this life. You’re in our world now. There’s gonna be shit you don’t like, but that’s just the way it is. So, make your peace with it or—”
“Or what?” I snapped.
“Or I’ll help you make your peace with it.” He leaned across the truck and settled his lips on mine.
I ripped my mouth from his. “You can’t just—”
His hands grasped the back of my head, and he kissed me again.
Deep. With tongue.
So I stopped thinking—and collapsed against him, soft and needy.
He chuckled as he dragged his lips to my temple. “You already talk like you’re one of us, Doc. I like that. I like that a lot.”
Was it true? Why did I feel such loyalty to a group of people I’d just met?
I knew who I was when I’d come to Dallas. But after meeting Boxer and the Blue Angels, I wasn’t sure I knew who I was at all.
He skimmed a thumb across the apple of my cheek. “Hey, Doc. You don’t have to worry about a thing. Okay?”
“I’m not good at living in the moment, Boxer.”
He grinned. “I’ll help you.”