Rise by Cassandra Robbins
GIA
Present – Twenty-five years old
Los Angeles, California
“I can’t believe you.” I look over at Julianna. Wearing an incredible pink chiffon halter dress and heels to die for, she looks like an angel. But clearly Julianna has become a devil since she came strolling in right when I was getting ready to call Blade and tell him one of his guys kidnapped my friend.
Thank God I didn’t because she’s glowing. “I was worried,” I say quietly.
“You were passed out. I thought you needed sleep,” she whispers back.
“I… how did this happen?” I smile as Bear and his old lady sit down next to us. We’re in a giant air-conditioned tent in the middle of one of those huge horse estates down the street from the clubhouse. And I should clarify—when I say tent, this is like lavish celebrity stuff. It had to cost my brother a fortune.
“Bear.” I nod. He looks uncomfortable in his dress slacks and black cut. He’s been around since as long as I can remember. I think he has a daughter my age.
“VP gone crazy.” He looks up at the chandelier hanging from the top, and the thousands of little sparkling lights glittering around the tent.
I can’t help but grin. “Guess so.”
“I love it,” his old lady says, her bloodred lipstick a bit distracting. “Big Bear here is just ornery because he had to get dressed up. Don’t he look handsome?” Julianna and I look at Bear whose stomach is almost bursting out of his black T-shirt. His beard is combed and his hair’s slicked back, all for my brother. That makes my heart ache.
“You both look gorgeous,” she adds.
I nod, tears already stinging my eyes, and lean back toward Julianna. “I’m losing it.”
She looks at me, then at my dress, and shrugs. “Well, at least you look good.”
“What has happened to you?” I mumble.
“I’m sorry I disappeared, but I had business to take care of.” She crosses her legs.
“Business? I had to sit in utter torture waiting for you while I got my makeup done, and I couldn’t say anything because apparently he’s with Cindy.”
“He’s not.” She smirks and I’m stunned.
“Are you high? What is happening?”
“Excuse me, Gia?” I jump and look over at a prospect who looks about as uncomfortable as Bear.
“Yes?”
“The VP said get your skinny ass… butt in the family section.” He straightens.
“Oh, yes. I was just…” I stand and look over at my mother who’s glaring at me. So much for hiding. “I’ll be right there.” He backs up but waits, which makes me grit my teeth.
“Just lay low,” I grumble, forcing a smile.
“What?” She looks confused.
“Stay here.” I slap her legs so I can shimmy out and try to walk straight. I had to have a couple of glasses of Cristal champagne because my head was pounding. That and my nerves were shot from worrying about Julianna.
The tent is filling up. I take in the multitude of flowers and the sight of Doug sitting and talking with my mom. Something is up. I mean, I know I’m going on very little sleep and all, but it seems like everyone is looking at me. Maybe it’s because I’m Axel’s sister, but that’s stupid. It’s not like they haven’t seen me before.
“Hey, Mom.” I brace myself against Doug’s shoulder as my mom looks up at me. Her knowing eyes don’t miss a thing, so I sit. Why pretend I’m good? It seems everyone knows already.
“Doug, please stay with me.” I grab his hand.
“Gia Ana Fontaine, do you have any idea how worried we’ve all been? Your brother has had enough to deal with, having to be all secret, and now all the press. Doug, tell her.” She looks over at Doug, who squeezes my hand.
“We’re not gonna worry about any of that right now, Janet. Gia’s here. I’ve fixed her up.” He turns to me. “You look amazing.” He runs his hands through my hair. “It’s all going to be fabulous.”
“Do you have any Advil? My head is pounding.” I feel bad, but my mom’s energy is not great right now. “What press?” I sigh, almost bracing myself.
“Nothing,” she snips as Doug sits back, wrapping an arm around me.
“Where’s Robert?” I lean into him.
“In the back. He gets nervous, you know.” I look back and blink at how many bikers and their families are here.
“You can bring Julianna up with us,” my mom says primly.
“What is wrong with you, Mom? I’m not in the mood. I’m here, the whole club is fixed up for your son, and he’s spent a fortune. Look at this tent. What can you possibly be unhappy about?”
She looks at me, and for the first time I can actually see tiny wrinkles under her eyes. She appears tired and worried, but I guess that’s our theme.
“You’ve been missing. You should have been a bridesmaid, not sitting in the back like a stranger. You missed all the parties, and you’ve hurt Antoinette, not to mention the twins, all so you can follow Rhys Granger.” She looks straight ahead.
And I’m done.
“Excuse me.” I stand as Doug pulls me back down.
“Let’s all just get through this day. We can get fucked up after pictures. Hold it together, Gia.”
“I’m not going to fight with you, Mom. But I will say this: I’m almost twenty-six years old. I refuse to let you take out all your shit on me. I have enough of my own.” This time my eyes are getting teary from anger, which, let’s face it, is better than a broken heart.
“Okay, let’s take a little walk.” Doug stands, takes my hand, and we head to the side of the tent.
“Talk to me,” he demands, his brown eyes looking around before he takes us into the corner of the tent.
“I’m holding on by a thin thread, Doug. I already have enough guilt, and don’t need my mom and all her shit.” I point at her.
He brings my hand down as I straighten my skintight red satin dress. It’s strapless so it’s a good thing I have great breasts. Otherwise, I would have spilled out of it already.
“That’s not what this is about.” His eyes caress my face. “Gia, Gia, Gia.” He pulls me into a hug.
“I’m almost numb, Doug. Yet my heart still burns. Why does it hurt so much?” I stare at the vast array of flowers in front of me.
“If it didn’t hurt, baby girl, it wouldn’t be worth it in the end.” I pull back.
“What does that mean?”
“It means the wedding is starting. Do you want your friend?” he says tightly as we both glance over at Julianna. She’s watching something on her phone. Then I glance over at my mom who looks pitiful sitting alone.
“God,” I groan and take his hand, returning to the chair I just vacated. “I’m sorry, Mom,” I whisper. It’s curt, but at least I did it.
She nods as the music starts to play out of the speakers and we all turn. All the guests in the tent, even the roughest-looking bikers, smile at them.
“Oh my God.” My hand goes to my chest as my twin nieces stand at the opening and stare at us. Juliette starts to walk, tossing rose petals, but Michelle stands there looking like she’s gonna cry.
“Oh dear.” I stand, ready to help, just as she sees me and throws the basket screaming, “Giaaa!”
I catch her right as my brother enters the tent. I laugh and squeeze her and kiss her fat cheeks. She squirms, but whatever, I need her right now. As my eyes lock with Axel’s, he must be satisfied with my appearance because he laughs as my other niece throws herself around my leg.
I hand Michelle to my mom and grab Juliette. We all turn to watch the wedding party walk down the aisle.
Eve smiles up at Blade. They’re all so beautiful and so in love, it almost makes my knees give out.
Charlie and David, Edge and Dolly, followed by Ryder and Cindy make their way to the assigned spots.
“I got you.” Doug stands behind me. He gets it, understands, and thankfully doesn’t say I’ll get over it. Because I won’t.
Never will be. I’ve loved Rhys Granger for as long as I can remember, and I will love him until the day I die.
It doesn’t matter if we never see each other again. This is my truth, and I need to make peace with it.
“Mommy.” Juliette points and my eyes drift to the tent’s opening. Antoinette stands in a white lace dress that has the most incredible train I’ve ever seen. She also has a veil I could only dream of wearing.
She’s beautiful, breathtaking. Guess I’m not the only one who thinks so, considering my brother, one of the club’s most-feared bikers, blinks back tears. Not waiting for her, he meets her halfway, taking her hand.
It’s then that I realize my niece is wiping my tears away. Why am I crying? Because he loves her so much. Axel never wanted this, and yet here he is. I look at his brothers standing next to him, smiling at him and at their own wives. It’s a family, a band of brothers who would die for each other.
Chairs creak as we sit and listen, but all I can do is cling to my niece who holds me back. Her chubby little hand plays with my hair as her parents say their vows.
“I never thought I’d see the day.” My mom reaches for my hand. I wonder if my dad was invited.
Why do you make all the girls cry? It spins in my head. I should have listened to Stephanie all those years ago. But as I look at my brother, I know that I regret none of it.
I love him, and no matter what the future holds, I know he loves me. And I wouldn’t give any of that up, even knowing how we’ve hurt each other, and despite the pain I’m in.
Some people are born to love many times. Others love only once.
Axel kisses Antoinette. Everyone cheers, and I smile, walking over to hug and laugh with my new sister-in-law.
Smiling for the camera as the photographer takes pictures. Laughing with Dolly. I do all these things, while in my head I’m counting the moments until I can hide in a corner and fucking sob and let out all of today’s joy. Because as happy as I am for my brother, I’m still human.
“You okay?”
I look up to see Edge. How long he’s been standing next to me is anyone’s guess.
“Edge, how are you?”
His blue eyes focus on me, and he wraps an arm around my shoulder. “Better than you.” He grins. “Come on, let’s get fucked up.”
Laughing, I let him steer me into another large tent with tons of decorated tables. I almost groan. I didn’t know we were having a sit-down dinner, or I guess brunch, in this case.
He walks me straight up to Axel who’s laughing with Blade and David, his arm planted possessively around Antoinette. I could have sworn I saw Julianna come in here. We need a plan. I figure we let everyone start drinking, then call an Uber and have them take me to my house in Venice.
He looks over at me and brings an arm around my shoulder but keeps talking. Again, I have this odd sensation like I’m missing something, but quite frankly, I’m too tired to care.
“I need to use the restroom.” Axel looks down at me, frowning, but lets me go. Stepping back out into the afternoon sun, I head into the massive, ranch-style house for the bathroom.
“Oh my God, in a way it’s fucking hot,” I hear Dolly as I turn the corner. She and Cindy are watching something on her phone, and I know this has something to do with me, or Rhys.
“It’s hot. Even the fuck you part.” Cindy bites her lip, watching the screen.
“Especially the fuck you par—” I walk straight up and hold out my hand to Dolly. She purses her red lips, and she glances at Cindy who looks a mess already. Her big boobs are almost falling out of her dress, and her eyes are slightly glazed. I almost ask her what she’s taking because whatever it is, she looks comfortably numb, and I could use some of that right now.
“Gia, I’m not supposed to show you this.” Dolly looks at me and suddenly it all clicks.
“Is this why you guys are all acting weird around me?” I almost stomp my foot, but I’m in five-inch Jimmy Choos, so I flop down on the couch.
“Just give it to me. I don’t have a phone anymore.” I put my head back. I’m so tired I could probably fall asleep, but that can wait until I see why the whole world seems to be looking at me like I’m some kind of different species.
Dolly flops down next to me and holds the phone away from me.
I sit up. “What? And who told you not to show me?” I reach for it, but she has speed on her side right now.
“Everyone.” She waves her hand. “I wasn’t even a Granger fan, but fuck, Gia.” She winks as a wave of adrenaline flows through me.
“Give me the phone.”
Dolly smiles and hands me the phone as she digs in her bag for her cigarettes. Her screensaver is Edge and their baby, Gunner, who has red curls and fat, rosy cheeks. Dolly and Edge need to have more babies. He’s incredibly cute.
“What’s your password? And I love this picture.” She smiles and lights up, taking the phone back so that her face can unlock it as Cindy sits on the other side of me, fixing her dress. Maybe she’s not as numb as I thought since her energy is rather aggressive.
“What’s the deal with your friend?” she says curtly.
“Why?” I may sound defensive, but fuck it, my life is out of control, and I need to watch the video. Her eyes laser on me.
“Cindy. Do I need to slap your tits?” Dolly leans over me to give Cindy a warning stare and hands me her phone.
“Is this going to upset me? Because I can’t—”
“God, Gia, really?” Cindy rubs her head. It’s kind of harsh since I don’t know her all that well. She’s close with Charlie. Dolly and I stare at her.
“I’m sorry. I’m a bitch, but come on. The fucking Rock God is singing about how his heart beats for hers, and she’s sitting here crying.”
“She doesn’t know any of this. And you’re cut off,” Dolly snaps right back as Cindy stares straight ahead. The only thing moving is her heeled foot, bopping up and down.
Suddenly I want to hug her. I’ve seen that look in so many women’s faces. Desperation, it takes over. You’re consumed with a person who you know, deep down, has moved on, but you can’t accept it.
“It’s okay, Cindy.”
She looks over at me, her blue eyes full of tears, and I nod. I want to say I get it, but the way she looks at me makes me think I should watch the video. Dolly takes her phone and presses play as she shakes her head and rolls her eyes at Cindy.
“This is actual footage of the Rome concert yesterday.” She sounds bubbly, excited.
“How is this up?” I say, because seriously this looks like Sebastian’s stuff. It’s up close and clean, not gritty like a fan shot it from below.
“Shhh, you’re gonna miss the best part.” Dolly cuddles up with me as my heart skips at what I hear next.
“Fuck you, Gia.”
Dolly pauses it. “I’ve got goose bumps.” She lifts her arm so I can see them.
I have to hear it again.
“Fuck you, Gia. One. Two. Three. Four.”
I bite my bottom lip as the dreaded tears I’ve been holding back spill and I hear his voice sing.
Smoke and whiskey, I can almost smell him as he grabs the microphone.
Baby, I don’t want to see you cryin’. But I can’t live without your love. This hunger that eats me up, only your lips can cure. Ammo’s guitar comes in hard and fast as it builds. I make everyone bleed. But that’s nothing compared to my heart. It bleeds for you.
It’s strong and powerful. And mine beats for yours. Nuke’s drums add the beat, and I’m mesmerized as I watch the magic.
It beats for you. Dolly’s hand takes mine, hers warm, mine cold as I watch him fucking destroy me with his voice and words.
Let me match your breathing; let me steal your breath, rest my racing mind. For this moment, I’m at peace. I can’t make you love me. I can’t control your heart. But baby, mine is yours. It beats for you. It beats for you.
The crowd starts chanting “beats for you.” Like someone addicted to pain, I swipe my finger to go back to the beginning.
“There’s been a lot of talk lately about my personal life. Shit that means nothing. But this meant something. I wrote it for another, but it belongs to you.” I jump when another video comes on of him. And I hand the phone back to her as I sit and smoke, the room filled with his black magic as all three of us can’t help but hear his voice in our heads.
“Well?” Dolly says.
“Well, what? That video means nothing, except that he’s drunk and wrote a song to me, then gave it to his real true love: his fans.”
“Snap out of it.” She claps her hands in my face. “You love him, he loves you.” She holds the phone up. “That was hot, and you know it.”
I clear my throat and wipe under my eyes. “He’s a rock star. I will agree he’s beautiful, but it’s way more complicated. I can’t always be worried he’s cheating or getting someone pregnant or dealing with his fans and the band—”
“Please. Welcome to our world. Why do you think I fucking stabbed Edge?” Dolly waves her hands, then leans back and crosses her legs like that’s a normal thing.
“Dolly?” We both jump as Eve walks in and looks at all three of us.
“You showed her?” She puts her hands on her hips.
“Of course I did. It’s freaking hot,” Dolly retorts.
“Are you okay, Gia? We all agreed to let you see it after the wedding.” Her eyes narrow on Dolly who answers for me.
“She’s fine.” Dolly turns to me and frowns. “Well, she will be.” She rubs my shoulder as I shake my head and stand.
“At least I know why you guys were looking at me weird.”
“We were not looking at you weird,” Eve says, shaking her head at Cindy who keeps staring at the wall in front of her.
“Let’s go. They’re ready to make a toast, and brunch was already served, plus they’ll be cutting the cake soon.” Eve motions for us.
“Let me fix your eyes.” Dolly stands and grabs my hand.
“Cindy? You coming?” We all look down at her.
“In a minute,” she says to the wall, then turns and looks at me.
“Stop it, Cindy. You’re definitely cut off. I’m serious.” Dolly frowns at her, then pulls me as we follow Eve.
“We need to get Charlie to handle Cindy,” Dolly states.
“Agreed. What is she on?” Eve hesitates. “Which one is the bathroom again? This house is huge.”
“That’s it.” Dolly points to the far door. “I know she’s on a new antidepressant. You think it’s that along with the alcohol?” she whispers, already digging inside her giant purse. She pulls out her makeup bag as Eve opens the door.
Only it’s not the bathroom.
We all three stop in horror. I think I scream, or maybe it’s Eve, but Julianna’s eyes pop open. Her blond hair and pink dress are like a flare alerting us. That, and their loud groans, along with her legs wrapped around Ryder’s waist as he fucks her against the bedroom wall.
“Holy fuckkk.” Dolly drops her bag with a loud thud.
Julianna screams.
Ryder doesn’t even seem bothered. He keeps thrusting, snarling for us to get the fuck out. I go to back up only to bump into a pale-faced Cindy.
“Oh. My. Fucking God,” she explodes. I try to grab her, but she’s already lunging at his back. “I’ll kill you!”
If I thought my life couldn’t get worse…
It just did.