Dawn by McKayla Box
Chapter 34
We’re halfway through dinner when Trevor pulls his phone out and frowns.
We’re sitting at the beach club at a table near the window. Trevor’s dad has a membership and while I’ve never been comfortable here, I have to admit that it doesn’t suck. The food is good – better than good, if I’m being honest – and it’s right on the beach. It’s like I could reach through the glass and touch the sand. We went back to his house after surfing, showered, dressed, and then came here for dinner. It feels like forever since we’ve been on a real date and even with my worries about everything, I have to admit it’s been a pretty nice day.
But now he’s frowning.
“What?” I ask.
“Hang on,” he says, and starts typing on the phone.
His hair is slicked back after the shower and the white cotton button-down he’s wearing practically glows against his tan skin. He doesn’t dress up often, but when he does, it’s enough to take my breath away.
He finishes typing and puts the phone away. “I gotta go tonight.”
And just like that it’s like the air is sucked out of the room. All of the details – the polished wood table we are sitting at, the fine linen napkins, the glow of the candles in the center of our table, the soft melody tinkling from the piano near the entrance, the delectable smells – evaporate.
“Again?”
He nods. “Yeah.”
I look down at the half-eaten salmon on my plate, the perfectly braised new potatoes and lemon asparagus, and push it away. “Awesome.”
“Sorry,” he says. “I didn’t think we’d have to do anything tonight.”
“But you do,” I say. “So that’s that.”
“Come on.” He frowns. “Don’t be like that.”
“I’m not being like anything,” I tell him. “I’m being honest. I’m pissed that you’re going again and pissed that our dinner is now all fucked up.”
“Our dinner isn’t fucked up,” he says, picking up his fork. “I don’t have to go right now.”
“But now I’ll be worried the rest of the night.”
“You don’t have to be.”
“And yet I am.” I shake my head. “This sucks.”
“It does,” he agrees. “I’m sorry. But I’ll text you when we go and when we get back. Or I’ll stop by. Whatever you want.”
“What I want is for you not to go,” I tell him.
He takes a deep breath, exhales. “I thought you said you wouldn’t ask me not to do this again.”
“I said I wouldn’t ask you to quit on Brett,” I tell him. “I never said anything about not running moonshine or whatever you’re doing.”
He laughs. “We’re not in Kentucky.”
“I wish we were. It might be better.”
“Hey,” he says. “Look at me.”
I hesitate, then glance his way. His eyes lock on mine like a tractor beam, his expression so sincere that I can’t look away.
“I won’t tell you not to worry,” he says. “You’re right. That’s not fair. So I won’t tell you that. What I will tell you is that I’ll be careful and that I’ll communicate with you.” He pauses. “And I’ll try to get an end date.”
“You think you can get that?” I ask.
“I don’t know. But I’ll try. Because then at least we’ll have an idea of…how long this will take.”
I hate the thought that this might drag on for weeks, even after I go back to school. I shake my head and look down at my plate again, my stomach turning at the thought of trying to eat any more of my dinner.
“Presley, I have to do this.” His voice is soft but urgent. “And the sooner it gets done, the sooner we can stop talking about it and move on. We can make plans. You can go back to school and I can figure out what the fuck I’m doing with my life. But this has to get done first. I need to get Brett squared away. I can’t do anything until that’s all taken care of. You know?”
I nod slowly. “Yeah. I guess.”
“We’ve had a really nice day,” he says. “I’ve missed these days with you. I don’t want it ruined by this. Can we just set it aside for now and finish dinner and just…be?”
I feel a flare of anger inside of me. It’s not fair for him to ask that of me. It’s not fair for him to keep me in the dark and to act like it’s all so simple. None of it is fair, no matter how much I understand his friendship with Brett.
But I don’t want to fight.
I don’t want to argue.
He has to do what he has to do.
And I need to do what I need to do.
“Okay,” I tell him. “We can stop talking about it for tonight.”
He sighs and nods. “Cool. Thank you.”
I stand up. “I need to use the bathroom, though.” I grab my purse. “I’ll be right back.”
I head to the restrooms near the front of the restaurant, my heels tapping a staccato as I march along the marble floor. I find an empty stall inside the bathroom and close the door behind me. I sit down on the toilet and pull my phone out. I find Sunny in my contacts and text her.
Hey.
It takesher less than a minute to respond.
Hey. What’s up?
I stare at the screen,then type.
Tonight. We’re going tonight.