Time-Lapse by J.B. Heller
Chapter Fifteen
I am consumed with melancholy.Hux really believes he deserves to be treated like shit. After he told me everything, I could see why he would think that. He’d been brainwashed.
And I hate his father even more than I had this morning after hearing the way he spoke about his only child. Hux didn’t deserve any of it, yet he took it all and shouldered the weight of his father’s state of mind.
The man needs help. But after seeing how his behavior has affected Hux’s opinion of himself, all I want is for him to rot in his own misery.
I can’t understand how a parent could put that kind of pressure on a helpless child. I would have thought the more appropriate response would be to love and cherish Hux more because he is his mother’s son. Shouldn’t his father appreciate that he still has a piece of her in him?
Understandably, Hux didn’t want to go home tonight, so I snuck him into the pool house. Not because my parents would have a problem with him being here, but because he didn’t think they’d approve of him. Even when I assured him they would, he was adamant about it.
So here I am, stashing a set of PJs in my pillowcase, along with my deodorant, toothbrush, and a handful of condoms from my brother’s bathroom cabinet.
I swipe a couple of apples off the kitchen counter on my way out the back door. “Camping in the pool house tonight, Ma,” I call to her in the walk-in pantry on my way past.
“Okay. Your father and I have that charity dinner at The Plaza with your grandparents. We’ll probably just stay there tonight,” she calls back.
I’d actually forgotten about it. I hate going to those events, but thankfully, this is one I’m not required to attend. A sudden bolt of excitement courses through me. I have Hux all to myself—with an actual bed at my disposal.
I backtrack into the kitchen as Mom steps out of the pantry in an emerald-green floor-length gown. I wolf whistle. “Lookin’ fine, Momma,” I say, waggling my brows at her.
She rolls her eyes and chuckles. “Do you want me to call Ben home for the night since you’ll be alone?”
Oh, hell no. Big brother would totally ruin my plans. I shake my head. “Nah, I’ll be fine. I’m just going to watch a couple of movies then crash. Besides, Ben’s probably got his own thing going on. He’s not going to cancel just to babysit me.”
“You know he’d drop anything for you.”
“Yeah, I do. But he doesn’t need to. I’m going to order a pizza, then I’ll be set for the night,” I tell her, hoping she’ll drop it.
“Okay, honey,” she says, closing the space between us to brush a kiss to my temple. “We’ll be home by lunch. Call if you need anything.”
“Okay, cool. Have fun tonight.” I wink then make my way out the back door.
A grin lifts my lips as I open the side door to the pool house and slide it closed with my foot.
I find Hux sitting on the floor, leaning back against the bed in the main bedroom.
“What are you doing down there?”
He lifts his eyes to my face and quirks a brow. “What’s that look about?”
“I asked first. Why are you on the floor?”
Scratching the side of his neck, he looks away from me. “Everything is white in here. I don’t want to dirty it up. I was hiking half the day.”
After tossing him an apple, I climb on the bed and position myself behind him then drape my legs over his shoulders. “You’re always so worried about getting things dirty, but you don’t mind being dirty,” I say, a slight hint of teasing in my tone. He can take it however he wants.
His shoulders shake with laughter. “Do you think of anything else? I thought it was a guy thing, but you think about sex just as much, if not more, than I do.”
I tense my thighs around his neck, teasing. “Don’t act like you don’t like it.”
He wraps his hands around my ankles, and he squeezes gently. “I didn’t say that,” he says with a grin as he tilts his head back to look at me above him.
I bounce my brows playfully. “Wanna help me dirty up this nice white bedspread?”
Hux’s eyes heat instantly, but then he closes them and shakes his head, pushing it away. “I … no, we shouldn’t.”
Frowning, I unwrap my legs from around his shoulders and slide down to the ground next to him. “What’s up, Mr. Mysterious? You going to start holding out on me?” I’m only half teasing in a lame attempt to lighten his, once again, dark mood.
Reaching over, I take his hand, lace my fingers through his, and swallow hard, knowing he is going to reject the next words that come out of my mouth. But I need to say them anyway. I don’t want there to be any doubt in his mind that I would do anything for him. “I would go with you, you know. If you asked me to.”
And even though I anticipated his reaction, it still hurts when his entire body tenses beside mine.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” I murmur. I try to keep the hurt out of my voice.
Before I even have time to begin my internal pity party, he’s wrapping his hands around my waist and dragging me into his lap until I am straddling him.
He nudges my chin up so that I’m looking at him. “You know if I was going to take someone with me, it would be you. Nobody means as much to me as you do. But I can’t take you with me, El. I don’t even know where I’m going to end up or what I’m going to do once I get there. I have to do this on my own.”
The tips of his fingers linger on my cheek, and I lean into his touch. “I know, but I just had to tell you.”
A small smile shifts at the corner of his lips. “I wish I was more. If I could change anything in my life, that would be it. I’d be more, better, so I could be good enough for you.”
My bottom lip wobbles as my tears begin to fall. “Don’t say that. I don’t want to change anything about you. Not one little thing. I love you, Hux, as you are, right now in this moment. My wish is that you could see yourself through my eyes.”
Hux shrugs. “You’re just saying that because of the orgasms. I’ve addled your brain with climaxes. It was my plan all along.”
I take the hint of his not-so-subtle subject change and drop the topic. I’ve said what I needed to. There’s nothing more I can do but enjoy my last week with him.
So, I roll my eyes back in my head and groan, “Oh, God, I totally fell for it.” Then, I shift quickly so my boobs are pressing up under his chin, and he starts laughing. “Don’t laugh. I’m seducing you. If you can use orgasms to alter my thoughts, I can use my boobs to bend you to my will.”
“You don’t even have to try, beautiful. I’d do anything for you, even if you weren’t molesting me with your breasts right now,” he says with a gorgeous grin.
My heart melts then begins to fracture. I smile through the pain leeching from my heart and spreading throughout my body one excruciating inch at a time. I jump to my feet. “Gotta pee!” I say then dash out of the room.
Locking myself in the bathroom, I quickly turn on the tap to drown out the sound of the sob that rips from my chest. I’ve known from the beginning that he was leaving. I also knew it would be hard to say goodbye.
But this … this ache that is consuming my entire body … I never expected it to hurt this much.
A soft knock comes from the other side of the door. “El, you okay?”
I take a few deep, steadying breaths then call back, “Yep. When you gotta go, you gotta go. You know?”
I bet he’s on the other side of that door, scratching the side of his neck right now, wondering if I actually had to pee or if I’m having some kind of nervous breakdown. I flush the toilet and wash my hands under the still-running tap, just to make my lie a little more believable, before swinging the door open.
Hux is leaning against the opposite wall, his hands shoved deep into his pockets, looking at his sneaker-covered feet. He glances up when I open the door fully, and I know he doesn’t believe my poor attempt at lying.
“I knew this would happen. I should have stayed away. I’m sorry, El.” A self-deprecating laugh shudders from his chest. “Guess my old man was right. Causing pain is all I’m good for.”
I launch myself at him and take his face in my palms. “You have made me happier than I’ve ever been, Hux. Don’t say shit like that about yourself. Your dad is a selfish prick. But despite him, you’ve turned into this amazing human being who takes my breath away with your appreciation of the little, seemingly inconsequential things in life.”
His eyes are on mine, and I can see right inside him.
“I love you,” I whisper then push up on my tippy toes so I can press my mouth to his kissable lips.
“I love you too,” he says right before he takes over the kiss and switches our positions, putting me against the wall.
Wrapping my legs around his waist and sliding my hands into his scruffy hair, I moan when I feel him harden between my legs. “No more talking. It’s depressing. I want you inside of me, Hux, now, please,” I beg.
He gives me a slight nod as he pulls me away from the wall then carries me back to the bedroom, where he gives me a few more of those mind-altering orgasms.