Time-Lapse by J.B. Heller

Chapter Twenty-Eight

To sayI’m happy about El getting jealous of the server who delivered our breakfast is an understatement of massive proportions. It means she still feels some kind of claim to me. And that means I have a chance of winning her over.

And maybe sooner than I had expected.

I just have to figure out what’s going on with the boyfriend. As much as I don’t want to change the topic of our conversation, I feel kinda shitty talking about her underwear when she’s in a relationship with another guy. I know I wouldn’t be okay with it if I were him, so I reluctantly redirect our conversation.

“So, where’d you meet the boyfriend?” I ask, going straight in for the kill. She frowns. It’s brief, but I catch it.

“Oh, Ben and I go way back,” she says with one of her fake smiles plastered on her face.

I decide to roll with it for a little while, although I’m ninety-nine percent sure she’s lying through her teeth. “What’s he do?”

“Fireman.” And this time, she’s telling the truth.

I nod. “Cool, I’ve got a lot of respect for guys that put their life on the line for others like that. How long have you been together?”

And the fake smile reappears. “Uh, a while,” she says, shifting her gaze out the window we’re sitting by.

I’m done with this little game. It’s not as entertaining as I thought it would be. I heave a heavy sigh. “Did you forget I can read you like a book?”

Her eyes dart back to mine, then her shoulders drop. “You suck.”

I chuckle. “I don’t, actually. It’s not my style,” I say with a shrug.

She rolls her eyes. “Ha ha. You’ve still got the same sense of humor,” she says, then she sighs softly. “What gave me away?”

“The little frown that flashed across your face when I asked where you guys met hinted that you were lying, but the fake smile is what really gave you away. So, what’s the deal with you two?”

Pushing her almost empty plate away from her, she rests her elbows on the edge of the table in front of her again. “He’s … my brother.”

I frown. “Why’d you let me think he was your boyfriend?”

She licks her lips and shifts her eyes off my face and back out the window. “I don’t know, maybe I thought you’d keep your distance if you thought I was with someone?” She shrugs, still not making eye contact with me.

A weight settles in the pit of my stomach. “Is that what you want? For me to stay away?” If she tells me to go, I will. But, God, I hope she doesn’t. She’s still looking out the window, gnawing on that plump bottom lip, and I can’t take her silence any longer.

I reach across the space separating us and wrap my hands around her wrists. “El, if it’s what you want, I’ll stay away. I’ll do what I need to do here, and you won’t even see me while I’m doing it. Then I’ll go.”

She’s still looking out that damn window, and I plead, “Look at me, El, please.” When she finally turns her eyes to mine, they’re brimming with unshed tears. “If it’s what you want, I’ll do it. But I’m telling you now, it’s not what I want.”

One single tear slides down over the apple of her cheek. “I don’t want that. But I’m scared, Hux. You left me once. You’ll leave me again.”

Bile rises in my throat at the pain in her voice—the pain that’s there because of me. And I don’t know what to say. I search my mind for the right words. “Let me prove it to you. You don’t have to trust me right away. You have no reason to. I took the coward’s way out before, and I’m so sorry, El. But I’ll spend as long as it takes making it up to you.”

I slide my hands along her forearms until I’m entwining my fingers with hers. “What do you say, El? Will you give me a chance to win you back?” My heart is in my throat, waiting for her answer.

She sniffles. “I’m your past, Hux, and you’ve got an amazing future ahead of you.” She shakes her head slightly, and her hair tumbles over one of her delicate shoulders, then she pulls her hands away from mine. “You need to move forward, and so do I. I can’t keep living in the past.”

Then, she stands up from the table, pulls in a deep breath, and says, “I’m sorry, but you broke me once. I can’t let you do it again. I have to protect myself.” Then, she walks away, leaving me shattered and alone.

Always fucking alone.

I’m walking awayfrom him, and it should feel liberating. Shouldn’t it? I’ve just closed the door on a past that has haunted me for the last five years. I should feel validated—relieved, even—but I don’t.

Each step I take that leads me farther away from him hurts more than the last. Why does it hurt so bad? I don’t understand. I’m doing the right thing, aren’t I? I’m doing what I should have done all those years ago, when he warned me what would happen. I’m putting the distance between us now that I didn’t then.

When I reach the threshold of the restaurant, I turn back to see him, and he’s sitting hunched over the table with his hands fisted in his messy hair. My heart aches. He just opened up to me, and I walked away from him.

I never thought the day would come when I would see him and he would want me back. In fact, I never thought I’d see him ever again. Yet, here I am, and I’m the one walking away.

The tears I fought so hard to contain in front of him spill over, and I make my way to the elevator bank with my head hanging low. I let my hair fall around my face, hiding my tattered emotions from onlookers.

When I reach my office, the door is slightly ajar. I push it open and see Grandfather standing by the window. I quickly wipe my tear-stained cheeks before he sees, but he catches my reflection in the tinted glass and turns to face me as I’m scrubbing my face.

“Want to talk about it, sweetheart? I’ve got years of experience to call on for advice.”

I step in fully and close the door behind me. I try to smile, but I can’t muster one up—not even a fake one. I sigh. “Not today, Grandfather. This one’s all kinds of complicated. Is there something you needed from me?”

He takes a seat on my couch before looking out the window. “Come sit with me,” he instructs, and I do. “I want you to work with this Hadley fellow. You know what I like, and while I’m yet to see anything of his that I don’t like … well, I just want you to keep an eye on it for me. Okay?”

Flopping back on the couch, I’m too emotionally spent to even try and act like this doesn’t bother me. “Is that completely necessary? You can’t keep tabs on him yourself?”

He raises a brow. “You’re normally more than happy to take on extra responsibilities. What is it about this that has you balking?” he asks with narrowed eyes.

“I don’t like him,” I say flatly.

Grandfather scoffs. “Since when has that been a problem for you? I’m sure you’ll put him in his place if he steps out of line. You’re the best ball-buster I’ve got,” he says with a wink.

While I would normally take that as a compliment, I really don’t want to think about Hux, or his balls, in any capacity. I groan. “I don’t think he’ll step out of line, I just don’t enjoy his company. I’d rather not have to work closely with him if I can help it.”

Right when I think he’s about to let me off the hook, he says, “So that wasn’t the two of you I saw walking across the lobby last night, soaked to the bone? And that wasn’t him having breakfast with you this morning in the restaurant?” he asks, raising a speculative brow.

My chest deflates. Damn it. “Do you have to notice everything?” I grumble.

And he smiles. “This is my hotel, sweetheart, and you are my granddaughter. I take a special interest in both of those things. Now, you can either tell me what is going on, or you can take the task I’m giving you.”

Crossing my arms, I mumble, “I’ll keep an eye on him, okay?”

Grandfather pats my thigh. “Good girl. I’ll be going out of town for a few days. I have a mess to clean up in one of the other branches.” He stands and bends at the waist before placing a kiss on my forehead. “This will be a good thing,” he murmurs then strides out of my office, nodding to himself, and closes the door behind him.

Well, there goes my plan to stay away from Hux.

And for some strange reason, my lips quirk at the thought.

Okay, maybe the reason isn’t so strange. I don’t want to stay away from him. I know that. I’ve never wanted to. Not back then. And not now. But I don’t think I’ll be able to handle it if it ends the same way this time.

He asked me to give him a chance, and I said no.

He told me he wanted to make it up to me, and I walked away.

I don’t know what to do. My head and my heart are at war. One wants me to wrap my arms around him and never let him go, but the other wants me to run away and protect myself from being hurt again.

I’ve never felt so conflicted. I didn’t even have to think about it when we were younger. I just dove in headfirst with no reservations. I wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anything. He made me happy. He showed me how to be myself—for that, I’ll forever be grateful. But the hurt and the pain that followed his departure still threaten to cancel out the good that having him in my life did in the first place.