Breathless Secrets by Elizabeth Lennox
Excerpt from “In Love with the Wrong Man”
Coming October 15, 2021
Click HERE for Maya and Jalil’s story!!
The funeral was miserable! It was hot, of course. But it wasn’t just the heat. It was…everything! Her hidden guilt was nearly overwhelming, because she knew she hadn’t loved Sandoor the way she should have. That only added to the unbearable sadness of the event, and the mourning crowds that lined the streets, grieving the loss of their happy-go-lucky prince. This was a brutally somber event and there wasn’t a dry eye to be seen.
Except Jahlil. He walked stoically behind the carriage carrying Sandoor’s casket; his features carefully blank. Maya walked beside him, her face hidden behind dark sunglasses and shielded with a large, brimmed hat.
Maya felt wrong about being in the family procession. She wasn’t a member of this family. She hadn’t gotten to the wedding and, worse, Maya knew, deep down, that she never would have. She should have told Sandoor she didn’t love him as a wife should. She should tell Jahlil that she hadn’t been a loving fiancée to his brother. But Jahlil had insisted. He’d explained that she was a member of the family, if only because she wore Sandoor’s engagement ring.
Maya would have argued, but she saw the pain and determination in Jahlil’s eyes and knew that he needed her. It wasn’t because she was a member of the family. It was because…because he needed her. And that gave her the strength to continue along the street to the family crypt where Sandoor’s body would be interred.
This procession wasn’t just for her and Jahlil. The funeral, ceremony, and procession, were for the citizens of Celina. They needed one last goodbye for their adventurous, fun-loving prince. Sandoor might have been irresponsible regarding his responsibilities, but the citizens of Celina adored him. They admired his whole-hearted embrace of life, love, and happiness.
What’s more, they respected Jahlil. He was their leader and they loved him even more. Every few minutes, someone standing on the streets would break the somber silence and call out to Jahlil, offering words of condolences. Sometimes, they called out to her as well. But Maya simply bowed her head, stifling the tears that kept coming at the most inopportune moments. Thankfully, for the most part, she got through the ordeal with just trembling lips and a determination to not shame Jahlil. She had to be here to support him. She might not have loved Sandoor as a wife, but she’d love him as a close, beloved friend.
With that in mind, she lifted her head higher, determined to emulate Jahlil. She could be strong. At least, she could be outwardly strong! Jahlil had helped her through this ordeal, so she’d do whatever she had to, to help him.
But when the time came for the casket to be interred, Maya couldn’t watch. She couldn’t stand by and see her wonderful friend be pushed into a cold, unfeeling block of marble.
Instead, she looked around at the others standing near the crypt. It was a beautiful, sunny day. Not too hot, thankfully. That’s when her eyes landed on Mike. Sandoor’s friend looked as if he’d gone through hell. His hair was rumpled, his tie was askew, and his eyes were red from crying. The pain in his eyes was almost tangible! Once again, Maya wondered if there was more to Sandoor’s friendship with Mike.
She turned her attention back to Jahlil. He was painfully still. The minister spoke a few words. And damn it, she hated the restrictions on public displays. Forget all of that! She reached out and took Jahlil’s hand! For a moment, he didn’t respond and she felt silly. But then his fingers squeezed hers. She tightened her grip, feeling the pain inside of him.
Maya wanted to lean against him, to silently offer him strength. But she kept herself very still, knowing that Jahlil had to appear strong, even during this most horrible moment. Nothing in his world was private, she thought sadly.
Except for that night when he’d held her in his arms. They’d shared something that night. She’d felt a connection to Jahlil from the moment she’d met him, but that night…the connection between the two of them had grown and strengthened. Maya didn’t fully understand how their relationship had changed. But it had. It frightened her in some ways, and comforted her in others.
Jahlil walked into his office, feeling a sense of…grim finality. Sandoor was gone. His funeral was over. He had a mountain of work that he needed to sift through. But instead, he turned his back on his responsibilities.
Maya needed…He stopped himself from assuming that she needed him. She wasn’t his woman, he reminded himself for the millionth time. Still, he thought of something that might help her through the next few days and weeks. At least, he hoped it would.
There was a bit of startled chaos when he stepped into the stables. Normally, his assistant would have called ahead to warn the stable hands that he was on his way. They would have had his horse saddled and standing ready for him.
But he wasn’t here to ride.
“My apologies, Your Highness!” the stable manager exclaimed, bowing as he rushed forward. “We were not informed of your imminent arrival. I’ll have your horse readied personally!”
“That’s not necessary,” Jahlil replied, holding up a hand to stop the man’s eager efforts. “I’m not here for a ride.”
The man bowed again. “Of course.” He looked around worriedly. “How can I assist you?’
Jahlil felt ridiculous. But he knew his idea would soothe Maya. “The kittens,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “I saw them several weeks ago, just after their birth. Are they weaned yet? Or do they still need their mother?”
The stable manager blinked in surprise.
“The…kittens, Your Highness?”
Jahlil wanted to laugh. “Yes. The kittens. Are they weaned? I was…I wanted to give one a new home.”
The stable manager shook his head. “I will happily take care of that, Your Highness. We give them to–”
Jahlil lifted his hand in the air, gently silencing the man. “I need one,” Jahlil interrupted firmly.
The man stared for another moment in stunned surprise, but he rallied quickly. “Of course! This way!” and he led Jahlil into one of the stalls where the small kittens were scampering about. They were still tiny little fluff balls, but they no longer needed their mother. In fact, the momma cat was already gone, out hunting, or whatever it was cats did during the day.
Jahlil bent down, examining each kitten. There were five in all and he had to admit that they were all pretty adorable. But which would be best? This was such an important decision. He almost laughed at how seriously he was taking this decision. He could snap off orders with military precision. But the selection of a kitten clearly required more effort.
One toddled over to him, staring up at Jahlil with huge golden eyes. The kitten meowed demandingly, then jumped onto his bent knee, balancing by digging its tiny claws into his slacks.
“I’m so sorry, Your Highness,” the stable manager gasped, rushing forward to take the kitten away, as if the tiny creature had done something heinous instead of simply acting the way kittens do.
“Its fine,” Jahlil replied, chuckling as he stood up, the tiny creature cradled in his arms. “This one is perfect,” he told the man. Then turned and walked back into the palace.
At the abrupt knock, Maya opened the door, feeling a sharp stab of pain when she spotted Jahlil standing in her doorway.
“Hi,” she whispered, leaning her forehead against the door.
“Hi,” he replied in his usual commanding voice. “May I come in? I have something for you.”
Maya’s mouth fell open. “Jahlil, I don’t need…” She stopped when he revealed the tiny ball of fluff he’d been hiding behind his back. “Oh!” she gasped, moving forward to accept the tiny kitten. “You are so adorable!” And then she laughed.
Laughed! She’d actually laughed! After the past week, a week filled with sobbing, grief, formal funeral events and…seemingly endless visits from the various dignitaries from all over the world…Maya hadn’t thought she’d never laugh again.
The tiny creature mewed, batting at a lock of her hair. “Where did you come from?” she asked the tiny creature.
“He…or she,” Jahlil sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, looking as if he felt completely out of place. “I didn’t take the time to check its gender, to be honest. I was looking for other aspects.”
She turned and looked up at him, once again startled by how handsome and amazingly wonderful Jahlil was. At this particular moment, she thought he looked even more handsome than ever. Behind all that royal harshness and male arrogance, there was a touching hint of awkwardness. It was almost as if he were embarrassed to give her the kitten.
“What aspects do you look for in a kitten?” she asked, charmed and intrigued as she brought the adorable creature to her cheek. Immediately, the kitten started purring like a jet engine! For such a tiny thing, its purr was loud!
Jahlil shifted uncomfortably on his feet, looking at something behind her. “Cuteness,” he mumbled.
Maya was so stunned, she couldn’t react for a long moment. Then she cracked up, her eyes sparkling. “You were looking for cuteness?”
Jahlil sighed and shuffled his feet. She watched with amusement as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I picked this one out for you. I know that you’re leaving us today, although I still think you should stay and live in the palace.”
Maya’s eyes softened. They’d had this conversation several times already and she sincerely appreciated his offer. “You know I can’t do that, Jahlil,” she said, smiling as she cuddled the kitten closer. “I have to go home. I have to get back to my life.”
“You could have a life here,” he pointed out, pacing back and forth. “I could create a job for you here.”
She laughed again, tamping down on the swelling of the unnamed emotion that welled up in her throat whenever Jahlil was present. Or not present. It was that same emotion that she refused to define, and refused to examine too carefully. It was an emotion that felt like a betrayal of Sandoor.
“I appreciate the charity, but I need to make it on my own,” she told him.
“What are you going to do?” he asked, furious all over again on her behalf when he remembered how she’d lost the job in Boston because the company had filled her position with someone else when she hadn’t arrived on the start date. “I can still call that company,” he offered. “I have enough power to get your job back. You stayed here for Sandoor. You shouldn’t be penalized for the generous gift of your time.”
Maya lowered her eyes, not bothering to tell him that she hadn’t stayed out of respect for Sandoor. She’d grieved for her lost friend. She’d always miss him. Sandoor had been a wonderful person and one of her best friends. But he hadn’t been the love of her life. She’d known that almost immediately upon arriving here.
Almost immediately upon meeting Jahlil.
Okay, that was one of those forbidden thoughts that she didn’t want to have!
The only thing she’d allow herself to admit was that she’d stayed here in Celina, not for Sandoor, but for Jahlil. He’d never admit it, but he’d needed her. He’d needed her in ways that…again, she wasn’t going to define. Together, they’d gotten through the past month. Day by day, they’d talked about Sandoor. Over dinner, she’d told him about how she’d met Sandoor, the way he’d teased her into leaving her studies to have a picnic. On another morning, Jahlil told her about how Sandoor had climbed too high into a tree one day. Jahlil had climbed up to help his little brother down, showing him step by step how to get out of the tree. She’d laughed at the story, awed by Jahlil’s bravery as well as his obvious love for his little brother. No matter how many times Sandoor got into trouble, Jahlil rescued him.
And Maya lov…greatly respected Jahlil.
Coming back to the present, she turned and smiled up at Jahlil. “I know that you have the power to fix just about anything,” she teased. “But my career isn’t something that I need you to fix, Jahlil. I have to do this on my own. I’ve gotten my degree, and now I need to go out into the world and prove to myself that I’m good enough.”
She saw the muscle flex in his jaw and knew that he didn’t agree with her. He was a lion. A protective lion, who was willing to take her into his household and protect her, even though she wasn’t even a member of his family. “What are you going to do?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I know that you paid the rent on my apartment for the next year,” she stated, watching his features. There was no embarrassment at his generosity being discovered. Just a slight lifting of one of those dark eyebrows, as if challenging her to remonstrate him for that generosity. “And I have some ideas on what I’d like to do.”
“Care to share?” he asked, an almost teasing note to his voice. But Jahlil never teased. Did he?
“No,” she laughed, untangling a kitten claw from her shirt. “If I tell you what I’m planning, then you’ll step in and interfere.” She looked up at him. “In a kind and generous way of course. But I’m not going to let you do that. You’ve done more than enough already.”
As she cuddled the kitten, the sparkle on her hand reminded her of one last thing she needed to do. Slipping the enormous ring off, she held it out to Jahlil. “Here,” she said. “This isn’t mine anymore.”
“Keep it,” he retorted, folding his arms over his massive chest as that arrogance came washing back into his demeanor. “Sandoor gave it to you. It’s yours.”
She shook her head. “No, it’s too expensive. And I never married Sandoor. It’s not mine.”
“It’s yours, Maya,” he replied firmly.
She smiled up at him. “I’m not taking it, Jahlil,” she said, moving over to the coffee table and setting the huge ring down. “Thank you for the kitten. I’ll bring him back to the stables.”
“The kitten is yours, if you want it.” His gaze sharpened slightly as he watched the scrap of fluff sitting on her shoulder, batting at Maya’s earring. He sighed. “And you’re flying home on my private plane. My assistant has already cleared the way for you to bring the animal into the United States, so you won’t have to deal with customs.”
She smiled up at him. “I can keep it?” she asked, awed by the wonderful gift. “Seriously?”
He chuckled and the sound sent that now-predictable shiver racing down her spine.
“Seriously, Maya. The kitten is yours if it will help you feel better,” he replied. His gaze turned serious. “You will call me if you have any problems, won’t you?” he commanded. It wasn’t really a question. “You’re under my protection now.”
She smiled, and did something daring. Moving forward, she snuggled her new kitten against her side as she hugged Jahlil. “I promise, I will call you if anything happens.”
He hugged her back, and Maya smiled at the awkwardness of his gesture. This man was not hugged enough, she thought.
Stepping back, before she did something foolish, like kiss him…she smiled up at him. “Thank you for the kitten,” she said.
He looked around, that awkwardness right back in place. “Well, right.” He sighed. “Take the ring. And the kitten. Sell the ring.”
She laughed. “I’ll take the kitten,” she told him.
Jahlil growled as he turned and left her suite.
Click HERE for Maya and Jalil’s story!!