Alpha Theo by C.J. Primer

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Brooke

I’m still reeling from Monday night. Dinner at the Jacobsen’s was such an ugly scene, one that keeps resurfacing and replaying in my mind. I knew Theo had it rough at home, that he left for a reason, but what I witnessed at dinner far surpassed what I’d imagined. I’ve never seen family members yell at each other like that, throw plates, cut each other down with their words. It was scary. It was like a movie; one I wish I’d never watched.

That look in his eyes when I ran into him in the hallway is still haunting me. Theo, always so cocky, arrogant, confident, looked… broken.

His freakout at the dinner table definitely wasn’t okay, but his dad shouldn’t have said what he did about Theo’s mom, either. It was so heartbreakingly cruel. He said it just to hurt him, and from the look in his eyes, it worked.

I still remember when his mom died. I was seven or eight, so he must’ve been about twelve at the time. My own mother sobbed as she told Fallon and me what happened- that our luna was out for a run in wolf form and was gunned down by a pair of hunters. Shifters can heal from most injuries, but a bullet to the brain is something we can’t come back from.

It was such a freak accident, such an unexpected tragedy that rocked our little town. Now that I think about it, that’s about when Theo started acting out- shortly after his mom died. In hindsight it all makes sense. He was a grieving little boy, and his hard-as-nails father didn’t give him any grace to deal with his trauma.

Don’t get me wrong, I still think Theo’s a jerk. He left me stranded in Summervale after that awful dinner, forced me to ask Quinn for a ride back. Yelled at me when I was just trying to help. But now that I’ve had a few days to comb over everything in my mind, I guess I’m beginning to see him in a different light. Maybe there’s more to Theo than his crass remarks and promiscuity. Maybe he liked that Green Day song so much because he really is lonely, deep down.

What’s the saying- sympathy for the devil? Guess that’s me right now. I see broken things and I have this innate desire to fix them.

Three days have passed since that night, and I haven’t seen Theo. He hasn’t shown up at the IT unit, hasn’t posted up at my desk in the afternoons. I’d love to say that means I’ve been getting a lot done, but instead I’ve been distracted, worried about him. I even tried texting him. He didn’t respond.

I hope he’s okay.

Gray invited me over for dinner at the Goldenleaf packhouse and I arrive a little early hoping to talk to Fallon, but she’s in the shower. I chat a little bit with Gray’s beta Deke and his mate Holly instead and greet Brock when he arrives. Brock brought Vienna along with him at Gray’s request as a surprise for Fallon. It’s great to catch up with her- Fallon and I became friends with Vienna while she was at training camp earlier this summer. She wound up getting cut from camp a few weeks in and went back home to Riverton; she’s part of the pack that Brock’s dad leads, the pack that Brock is poised to take over at the end of the summer. Vienna’s so much fun to be around- she’s a little Latina spitfire with a big laugh and a sunny disposition.

Fallon and Gray come down after a while and everyone settles into their seats while Deke finishes bringing out the food. It all smells amazing- Holly’s an excellent cook, and she’s whipped up a fancy chicken dish for this little dinner party they’re throwing.

There’s food, wine, laughter- everything needed for a nice evening- but I’m unprepared when the front door of the packhouse swings open and Theo steps inside.

I freeze, forgetting to breathe as I watch him shrug off his leather jacket, slinging it over the couch as he makes excuses for his tardiness.

It would’ve been nice if Gray had mentioned that he’d be here. Then again, why would he? He has no idea what’s been going on between Theo and I, our fragile… friendship?

Are we friends?

Do I want to be his friend?

Theo tries to take Deke’s chair on the opposite end of the table, but Gray tells him it’s taken and points out the empty seat beside me instead. My eyes flutter up to meet Theo’s and those hazel eyes peer back at me cautiously, then flicker away as he trudges over to take his seat.

Shoot. Well this isn’t awkward at all…

I don’t know what to say to him, so I just avoid eye contact, pretend he’s not sitting right beside me smelling like cedar and pine and motor oil, so rugged and masculine that it makes my wolf perk up and whine.

We all raise our glasses as Gray gives a short speech to thank us for coming and we clink them together, sipping the wine. It’s a little sweet, just how I like it, and I lick my lips as I set my glass back down.

There’s a chorus of clinking silverware as everyone digs into the meal, engaging in polite conversation. I feel so awkward sitting beside Theo that I just keep my head down, keep quiet. Part of me wants to ask him how he is, where he’s been, but I don’t have the guts to do it in front of all these people and I doubt he’d want me to.

Gray beats me to the punch.

“How you been, man?”

It takes Theo a moment to realize that Gray’s talking to him, then he swallows the bite of chicken he’s been chewing and clears his throat. “Good. Just livin’ the dream.”

Liar. I take another sip of wine.

“How are things going with the IT unit? You still checking in over there every day?” Gray asks.

“Yup,” Theo responds, popping the ‘p’.

I dart him a glance, but he doesn’t return it.

Gray looks to me for confirmation- and I won’t call Theo out for his lie, at least not this time. It’d be like kicking him while he’s down. I just smile and nod.

That must satisfy him, because Gray moves on. “How’s the program coming, Brooke?”

“Great,” I lie. Guess Theo and I are both liars tonight. “I’ve almost got the kinks worked out.”

Gray raises his glass to his lips and takes a long sip before he sets it back down. “Good to hear. You up for a trip to Denver?”

“Really?” I stare at him, eyes wide, interest piqued. The Denver pack has a security team complete with IT, and since Gray brokered an alliance of sorts with Denver recently, I’ve spoken with a few of their IT specialists over the phone. It sounds like they have a heck of a setup there and I’d love to see it. “When?”

He grins. “Tomorrow, actually. I know it’s short notice, but it’s just an overnight trip- you can tell them about your new program and get the latest from them so we’re on the same page.”

I nod enthusiastically. “Yeah, I’d love to!”

Gray pops a piece of chicken in his mouth, chewing. “Great,” he mumbles, swallowing. “I was gonna go up there on my own but figured it’d probably be better to have someone who knows what they’re talking about come along.”

“For sure,” I laugh. “I’m excited, I can’t remember the last time I got outta the six-pack territory.”

“Me neither,” Fallon adds, pouting a little. “I’m jealous, I wish I could come with you guys.”

Gray turns to my sister, sliding his hand over hers and lacing their fingers together. “Next time, babe.” He brings their intertwined hands up to his mouth, twisting them to plant a kiss on her palm.

Ugh. He’s so attentive, so affectionate. They’re so frickin’ cute. The hopeless romantic in me swoons.

“I’ll pick you up at seven?” he asks, turning back to me.

I nod, lifting my glass again. “Sounds good,” I say before I tilt it back, savoring more of the sweet wine.

I loosen up a little bit after that, and after a second glass of wine I almost forget all about the uncomfortable tension between Theo and me. It isn’t until the evening’s over and we’re all getting ready to head out that I’m reminded, because Theo and I are the last to leave and we try to walk out the door at the same time. We do an awkward little dance before he just gestures for me to go first and I step outside, calling goodbye to Fallon and Gray one last time.

Theo steps out beside me, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans as the door closes behind him.

It’s just the two of us on the front stoop and the tension is so thick that you could cut it with a knife.

I feel like I need to say something, anything to clear it.

“Where’s your motorcycle?” I ask cautiously, looking around.

I don’t see it in the driveway. Wasn’t that his excuse for being late?

To my surprise, he actually responds, addressing me for the first time all evening. “Stalled out. I had to walk over.”

“Oh.” I bite my lip, glancing up at him. “Wanna walk back together, then?”

He shrugs. “Guess so.”

We both start down the walkway, side by side. Even though I’m tall, his strides are so long that I have to take two steps to every one of his.

“You haven’t been up to the IT unit.”

Theo blows out a breath. “I’ve been busy.”

We hit the end of the driveway, turning to head down the street. The streetlights illuminate the pavement in a soft glow as we walk silently, heading for the edge of town to pick up the trail to the complex.

It isn’t like Theo to be this quiet. He’s usually the one chattering in my ear, but tonight he’s reserved, broody.

Guess I’ve gotta take the lead. I’m cautious with my conversation, unsure of what to say given how things left off between us, how fragile he seemed in the hallway of the Summervale packhouse when we last spoke.

“Listen, about the other night…”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Theo snaps. He stops walking, turning to face me. I stop, too, looking up at those intense hazel eyes as he sighs, raking a hand through his hair.

“Can we just agree to never talk about it again, go back to normal?” he asks, voice gravelly.

It’s a total cop-out, but who am I to tell him to confront his feelings or stand up and take accountability for his actions? At this point, I just want this awkwardness between us to go away.

I bite my lip, nodding. “Yeah. Okay.”

We start walking again.

“You did leave me there, though,” I say quietly. That’s one thing I can’t let go.

He darts me a glance. “I know. Sorry about that. I just…” he sighs, scrubbing a hand over his face. “Being back there makes me crazy.”

He’s obviously still hurting, so I’ll let it slide for now.

We approach the bar on the edge of the territory, the faint hum of the music inside audible from where we are on the street.

“Wanna head in for one?” Theo asks, flicking his head in the direction of the bar.

I shake my head. “Early morning. I’m heading to Denver, remember?”

He nods, glancing wistfully at the bar. “Right. Well I think I’m gonna…” he tosses a thumb over his shoulder.

“Oh, yeah,” I chirp. “You go ahead.”

Theo offers me a wry smile, taking a couple of steps backwards.

“Can you make it the rest of the way on your own, kid?”

I chuckle, rolling my eyes. “Yeah, I think I can manage.” I give an awkward little wave. “See ya.”

Theo mumbles a goodbye, turning on a heel and stalking over to the bar entrance. I watch after him for a moment before continuing on to the path that leads back to the complex.

Can’t say I’m surprised. Despite the vulnerability he displayed the other night, he’s still the same old Theo. He probably needs a whiskey and a woman as a nightcap.

I trudge down the path alone, scolding myself for being such a pushover. I let him off the hook too easy for stranding me in Summervale- I should’ve made him earn my forgiveness. To what end, I don’t know. Like I said, I’m not even sure if we’re friends.

Though it would’ve been nice if he’d walked me home.